Virgins Never Die
by Thrifty Sara
Summary: [Alternate ending for first film changes trilogy] Stu and Randy go to college after framing Sidney for the Woodsboro Murders. This is the story of their wacky mishaps and how they go about killing again.
1. Stu and Randy?

**Author's Note:**

Greetings and salutations! This chapter is the alternate ending to the movie. If you've already read this then read it again because I've edited it to make it remotely readable because at first it was the most god-awful thing created.  
  
**0-0-0-0**

"You get the gun and I'll untie pops, okay?" Billy ordered calmly as he held the knife to Stu's cheek, both staring at one another with psychotic looks.  
  
Stu sent Billy demented looks, knowing what he had to do. He slowly nodded and said, "Okay..."  
  
His lanky frame turned for the gun, stepping over the tied up and gagged Mr. Prescott on his way to the little table. He bit down on his lower lip in attempt to silence his questionable laughs. Unable to contain himself he glanced back at Billy and muttered, "Sorry, Billy!"  
  
"What?" Billy asked, his eyes squinting lostly.  
  
"I said I'm sorry!" Stu stared at Billy with the dark look on his face.  
  
"Why are you sorry?" Billy asked as he raised his eyebrows. He fearfully thought something was wrong with the gun or something.  
  
Stu looked in Billy's direction and yelled with a menacing tone, "Fuck you, Billy boy! Fuck you!"  
  
Stu stumbled to the table and snatched up the gun quickly as though if he went any slower he would be doomed. He turned the gun towards Billy and blinked a few times as though to clear his vision. He aimed it directly at Billy's head and mocked cruelly, "Incase you didn't catch this part.... I'm going to kill you now, Billy boy!".  
  
"When did you decide upon this?" Billy stared at the gun fearlessly, knowing Stu wouldn't be able to do a spur of the moment murder. Sidney stood there silently as she watched the two psychopaths' every move.  
  
"Oh no you don't!" Stu pointed a finger accusingly at Billy while laughing insanely and saying, "You are not getting a motive out of me! You really don't deserve shit, Billy boy!"  
  
"You're not going to kill me though," Billy said confidently, "You're just the sidekick. You're not the killer who always gets away. I am!"  
  
"Billy boy, its been fun and you were a good friend. Too bad as the killer you sucked!" Stu laughed at Billy's confidence and pulled the trigger on the gun. Billy opened his mouth to protest and got a bullet in the center of his forehead. He fell to the ground dead and the knife he had held in his had fell to the kitchen floor with a clang.  
  
"I'm the killer, bitch! I'm the killer," Stu barred his teeth as he kicked Billy's lifeless body. As he looked down at Billy he said in a psychotically calm voice, "And that is how it's done."  
  
Stu wasn't even paying attention as he turned and squatted down next to Mr. Prescott's tied up figure. Stu's eyes were wide with child like happiness as he said, "I feel a lot better now. In fact, if you didn't already know I was the killer I would let you go. It really sucks to be you..."  
  
The tied up man struggled slightly as Stu held the cold gun against his cheek. With Stu's free hand he waved as he jammed the gun in the side of Mr. Prescott's head. The man's eyes were wide with terror as Stu didn't hesitate to pull the trigger, just like he didn't hesitate with Billy. As the bullet entered Mr. Prescott's head Stu echoed the effect of the gun with a loud, "Bang!"  
  
"So sorry, Sidney!" Stu said with a wide smile as he slowly turned to mock Sidney. She wasn't in sight. He quickly (as quickly as he could with his newly acquired wounds) stood up and violently turned in every direction in search for any sign of Sidney.  
  
"Fuck!" Stu snapped violently. He sighed then said in a calmly annoyed tone to himself, "I knew that'd be too damn easy...."  
  
He was prepared to leave the kitchen to search for her when the phone rang. He jumped slightly then slowly crept toward the phone. He picked it up and asked, "Jay Jay's Pizza Shack. How may I help you?"  
  
"Do you want to play a game, Stu?" The creepy voice asked, Stu knew it was Sidney instantly.  
  
"Sid, let's be a good little girl and come die," Stu said as he stumbled around, noticing his large amount of blood loss.  
  
"I asked you if you wanted to play," The creepy voice repeated her request to play. Stu rolled his eyes and insisted, "Well, I don't really wish too play right now unless we play The Slice and Dice Sidney Up game. Is that the game we're gonna play?"  
  
"Let's play 'Guess Where Sidney Is'."  
  
Stu decided he might as well and questioned, "Alright, let's play. Is Sidney on the front porch?"  
  
"Why don't you look and find out," The creepy voice said.  
  
Stu walked towards the front door, not really thinking over his actions now. The phone fell to the ground when it ran out of cord and the banging noise of it hitting the ground bothered Stu and made him feel uneasy. He stared at the door as he stood in front of it, considering not making the victim-like mistake and opening it.  
  
He decided not to open it and the door suddenly flew open, banging against his face. He backed away, rubbing his face with his free hand as he dropped the gun distractedly.  
  
Sidney rushed in through the door and held a bloody knife in her hand. Tears streamed down her face as she yelled, "You killed my father! Now, guess what?"  
  
Stu cursed then asked, "What?"  
  
"You lose this game," Sidney raised the knife in the air and was ready to thrust it into Stu's chest.  
  
Stu realized this would be the end of his movie so he thought quickly, pointed behind her and said, "Oh fuck! It's Billy!"  
  
She quickly dropped the knife and turned to see no one. She sighed, disappointed in herself, and turned back to see Stu snatch up the gun and knife. Stu laugh menacingly, glad to be in control again.  
  
He mocked, "No, Sid. You lose this game."  
  
A groan came from behind them and Stu violently turned to see Randy slowly standing up, clamping a hand over his bullet wound...  
  
"Hey Randy, nice of you to join us," Stu said with an evil look in his eyes.  
  
"Randy!" Sidney ran to his side quickly and said, "You were right! Stu is the killer!"  
  
"Really?" Randy raised his eyebrows in an unsurprised way. He stared at Stu and Stu stared back in understanding.  
  
Randy finally looked at Sidney then asked in a blank tone, "So, you finally gave it up to Billy?"  
  
She blinked and wondered, "What does that have to do with anything?"  
  
"Well...." Stu explained, "You gotta die now. We've already established that!"  
  
"So Stu," Randy went back to staring at Stu when he asked, "You wanna kill her or should I?"  
  
"I might as well... I don't want you to black out because of it, you big girl!" Stu watched Sidney carefully, watching as she began to back away slowly as she shook her head in disbelief.  
  
Sidney backed up until she was flat against a wall. She inquired as she still was in denial about the truth, "You're joking, right Randy?"  
  
"Not quite," Randy shrugged his shoulders innocently then remembered his wound and asked Stu, "You shot the bastard, right?"  
  
"What do you think?" Stu asked back with an added nod. Randy sighed in a relieved way then commented, "He shot me. I really didn't see it coming."  
  
"Well, your even now because he didn't see his death coming," Stu glanced over at Sidney and stared at her dangerously.  
  
Sidney opened her mouth to say something and Stu cut in, "You want a motive now, don't you?"  
  
Slowly she nodded and Randy answered, "Well, at first I had nothing against you as me and Stu started plotting against Billy. Then I started to slowly get annoyed with you until I hated you."  
  
"We were friends," She pointed out. Randy just laughed and said proudly, "Or so it seemed."  
  
"Okay! Now is the time when we foolishly tell her how we did it!" Stu said excitedly then asked, "Care to do the honors, Randy?"  
  
"You see, Sid, it all started around the time Billy and Stu started plotting to kill your mother. That is when me and Stu started plotting against Billy and of course, you!" Randy explained, nodding towards Stu to continue.  
  
Stu continued the explanation, "Randy, this whole time, has had to act like he had a little crush on you as he sent accusations at everyone. I feel sorry for him really..."  
  
Randy eyed Stu's wounds and asked, "Are you okay? You look like your gonna die."  
  
"I'm fine!" Stu insisted, waving a hand at Randy dismissively. He stared at Sidney darkly and said, "Now we must frame you for everything!"  
  
"Yes!" Randy continued enthusiastically, "We are going to make you seem mentally insane!"  
  
Stu glared at Randy and snapped slightly, "You don't tell her the plan."  
  
"Its not like I gave her details!" Randy defended.  
  
Stu rolled his eyes and while doing so he noticed a costumed figure standing at the top of the stairs. The person stared at him and his eyes widened in horror. The person quickly ran out of eye sight and Stu quickly asked Randy, "Did you see that?"  
  
"See what?" Randy looked around nervously and saw nothing. Stu pointed up the stairs and said, "I saw someone!"  
  
"Fuck!" Randy cursed and looked to Stu for answers in what to do in this situation. Stu handed the gun to Randy and said, "You call the cops and watch Sid and I'll go take care of whoever the hell is here."  
  
Randy nodded in agreement Stu started stumbling towards the foot of the stairs. He finally realized how much blood he was losing. He then crept slowly up the stairs, trying to concentrate on what he was doing. He walked toward the first bedroom he came too and poked his head in. He saw no one and was relieved.  
  
He entered the room and sat down on the bed, overlooking his wounds. He was so fuckin' glad Billy was finally dead. He stared down at his shoes and took in a big breath. Looking down, it was almost impossible to see anyone coming and he didn't.  
  
The costumed person slowly crept up behind Stu with a butcher knife raised in the air. The person was totally unseen until they tripped and fell onto the bed causing Stu to jump up violently and stare at the person while exclaiming, "What the hell!?"  
  
The unknown figure scrambled off of the bed and lunged at Stu, the knife being forced into his shoulder. He gasped and gradually found his way to the ground. He stared up at the masked person until everything went dark and he blacked out. 


	2. New Beginnings

Author's Note:

Well, this originally was horrible but it has been fixed and reborn. Read it! And, thank you for any feedback!

**0-0-0-0-0**

A year had passed and everything changed so abruptly that it seemed like they all were no longer living in reality; It was as if everyone stepped out of actuallity and entered a living movie. In most movies, It'll be summer and you'll blink and open your eyes to see Christmas. Thats how it all seemed for the people of Woodsboro.

Sidney's movie wasn't going as she had hoped it would. Everything Stu and Randy (and leastly, Billy) had done pointed all the accusation arrows in her direction in the end. She was blamed for the murders of some of the people she was closest too. Even some of Stu's closest buddies were convinced they saw her go back to the school the day Principal Himbry was murdered and made it known in court.

Shortly after the trial (where Stu and Randy testified willingly), Sidney was sentenced to Lyon's Asylum For The Criminally Insane for an undetermined length of time.

She now resided in a white, windowless room with padded walls. She sure as hell was living the life. After almost a year in there she really was losing her mind. All she had left were the memories of the night Stu and Randy destroyed her and the idea of revenge. One day she was going to get Stu and Randy back for the life she was now no longer able to live.

Sidney was the girl who cried "killer".

**0-0-0-0-0**

Stu and Randy walked together on the campus of their college, plotting and shopping for new victims.

"Let's kill her," Stu said eagerly as he pointed to the rude cheerleader type of girl as they passed her. Miraculously she was unable to hear their loudly spoken plots.

"In good time. Its mandatory for the blondes to get killed," Randy replied smartly.

"So what your saying is that we should kill all the blondes?" Stu asked as his eyes shifted from person to person. When they landed on her he asked in amusement, "Even the blonde little social misfits?"

"Why not," Randy shrugged, not really paying attention to anything. Mentally, he was off restocking movies at a video store in California.

"Even her?" Stu nodded towards two girls who were gradually lurking their way down the sidewalk towards them. Randy paused the mental picture of setting Cujo on the shelf in the horror section and looked at the girls with mild interest.

One of the girls had dark purple hair that fell halfway down her back, most of it covering her pale face and leaving her a mystery. The other girl wore her blonde hair in two messy, frizzy pigtails that were sticking out of the front of the top of her head, pointing out like devil horns. As her hair bounced out of her face with each step her pale face and blue eyes (surrounded with large amounts of black eye make-up) were revealed.

"I don't know. Let's meet her and see if she is killable," Randy suggested, his interest level elevating.

"Yeah! Good plan, Randy. We'll just walk up and ask them to take part in a survey," Stu replied sarcastically, sighing at their lack of planning.

"Well...." Randy knew Stu was remotely clever and would be able to think on his feet. Plus, Randy's next action would be kind of funny.

Without saying anything Randy just shoved Stu. The outcome: Stu rammed into the blonde girl violently, making her whimper.

"Walk much?" The blonde snapped, looking offended that he was even touching her. She turned to her purple haired friend and whined, "Aw Jenna, the strange boy is molesting me...."

"You wish," Stu retorted, clearly aware of his sex appeal. He looked to Randy for the answers only to see his geeky friend laughing silently. Stu rolled his eyes and looked back at the girls, taking in their features.

The girl with purple hair, Jenna had finally brushed her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ears nervously. Her teal eyes darted from Stu to the ground as her black fingernailed, silver ring covered fingers ran themselves around the the fabric of her black, oversized Thir13en Ghosts t-shirt. Also incorporated into her outfit were black, baggy jeans that hung over her black, leather boots (Sponge Bob shoe laces dangling off of them).

Stu didn't even bother looking the blonde over as he asked, acknowledging her shirt, "You like the movie Thir13en Ghosts, huh?"

Her eyes widend in slight horror as she wondered how the hell he knew that. She realized that he was staring at her shirt and finally answered shyly, "Yeah. Thir13en Ghosts just kicks ass. You gotta love Matthew Lillard."

"The dude who plays Shaggy?" Stu shook his head. "He's not that great."

"He's tons better than you," The blonde said, already disliking Stu. This got Randy's attention.

Randy stared at the girl, looking her up and down. She wore a black t-shirt that read in red, blood like print "I'm not the killer, I swear!" She also wore a plaid red skirt worn over a pair of black jeans. Her navy blue shoes had many random things written on them such as "The Colonel is your dictator!"

Randy smiled at her and said the first thing that came to mind, "Killer!"

The girl stared at Randy in a startled fasion. She then defended lostly, "But... My shirt says that I'm not. I swear."

"No offense but I just met your shirt and I don't know it well enough to trust it," Randy's smile widened.

The blonde, Sara looked down at Randy's green shoes and asked (changing the subject) with no sign of shyness at all, "Can I rape your shoes?"

"Women aren't meant to be killers. They're supposed to stay in the kitchen and bake pies," Stu said simply to start a little controversy as he glanced over the blonde's shirt.

"Complications!" Jenna waved her hands around. Then she sighed and mumbled, "And so it begins...."

"Listen, you!" Sara poked Stu in the chest as she screamed in her little rant, "Women are equel to men! Hell, we are more then equel if you ask me! I mean, why would we want to be on the same level as guys like you? You have mullets, bathe irregularly and are incapable of calling another male by anything but their last names! Just think of it like this! Men, who start out as women in the beginning, are a downgrade in comparison to women. And-" She sounded more passionate about this then anything else as she said, "-Matthew Lillard is a god amoung insects!"

"But... I have no mullet!" Stu pet the top of his head defensively.

"Yet!" Jenna added. Sara laughed and said, "Hah! The mullet is going to get you one day! On that day you'll wish you were back in your mama's womb getting a sex change!"

"Right.... Now let's speak realistically here," Stu spoke to Sara as if she was an ignorant child. "Women are only good for one thing...." Stu winked at Jenna causing her to fear what that one thing he spoke of was. "That one thing being makin' pies."

Jenna couldn't help but grin. Then Stu began, "Well, Jenna- It is Jenna, right?" She nodded slowly and he continued, "What is so great about the dude who plays Shaggy?"

"Well," A shy smile covered her face as she ventured into her mind for an appropriate answer. Sara leaned over and and whispered something to her. "As Sara puts it," Jenna stared skeptically at the blonde she repeated in a mocking robotic voice, "Whoo whoot! Hot stuff!"

"What about me? Am I hot stuff?" Stu asked, already knowing that he was.

"Shoe man is much hotter than you," Sara answered, looking towards Randy with a smile.

Both Stu and Randy started looking around themselves in search of this shoe man the strange girl was speaking of. Jenna shyly pointed out, "I think she means you..." She pointed at Randy and Sara nodded in agreement.

Stu was upset by this, not because he cared what the girl thought but because for once he was considered a downgrade to his geek of a friend. Randy was suprised yet happy. Finally, someone understood and got things right.

In a hurry to maintain his precious ego, Stu quickly, in a slightly hurried voice, asked, "Jenna, you think I'm hot stuff, right?"

A blush slowly crept up Jenna's face as her eyes fell to the ground. Not knowing what to say she quickly said, "I gotta go! Bye!"

"Yeah...." Sara kind of glared at Stu as she agreed, "We'd better go before you two ask us out."

"A little too sure of yourself, aren't you?" Stu questioned as the blonde slowly backed away from them. She simply shook her head in response.

"Bye..." Jenna said shyly as she turned and started walking away. Sara waved to Randy and said with finality in her tone, "Farewell, Shoe Man!"

Randy grinned and called after them, "My name is Randy!"

Sara nodded then turned and walked off with Jenna. Once the two were long gone Stu whispered to Randy, "We're killing Sara."

"I don't know. I liked her," Randy shrugged his shoulders. Then he questioned, "What about Jenna?"

"What about her?" Stu asked back, a little lost in his angry expressions.

"Are we going to kill her too?"

Stu didn't know yet so simply replied, "I don't know. Are we?"

"Well, I don't know, Stuart. Is she promiscuous? Does she say _I'll be right back_ excessively? Does she drink and light up a doobie whenever she gets bored?" Randy spoke in all seriousness as a mischevious grin grew on his face.

"We'll find out in good time," Stu wasn't worried in the least. He was confident that they'd have no problem finding victims this year.


	3. Drama IS funny

A/n I hope you like this. Im sorry it all sucks.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Jenna and Sara walked together down the hall with a girl with short curly blonde hair walking with them.  
  
"Kayleigh, you need to stay away from this one guy we met today," Sara said, annoyed.  
  
"What was his name?" Jenna asked.  
  
"I don't know. Let's call him Dennis," Sara replied.  
  
"What did he do that was so horrible?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"He was created," Sara answered.  
  
"What about that other guy?" Jenna asked.  
  
"Randy? He seems quiet," Sara answered.  
  
"Jenna, Sara! You two need to stop denying your attraction for these guys," Kayleigh said enthusiastically.  
  
"You're the one in denial of the feelings you have for Gerritt!' Jenna yelled. (A/n-That's just for you Kayleigh!)  
  
"I have to go to my class," Kayleigh said as she ran off.  
  
"Bye Kayleigh," Jenna and Sara said in unison.  
  
"We have film now, right?" Sara asked.  
  
"Yeah," Jenna replied.  
  
Sara tripped and fell on her face.  
  
"You're so graceful, Snoopy," Jenna said with a laugh.  
  
Sara kicked Jenna causing her to fall. They both began to crack up laughing.  
  
"Are you two okay?" Stu asked as he stood over them.  
  
Jenna stopped laughing suddenly and stood up.  
  
"Thanks for helping me up, Jenna!" Sara said sarcastically as she stood herself up.  
  
"No problem."  
  
"What are you guys doing?" Stu asked.  
  
"We're heading to film class," Jenna answered quietly.  
  
"So are we," Randy said as he ran up to them.  
  
"Jenna wants to know your name," Sara blurted out to Stu.  
  
"I'm Stu."  
  
Jenna elbowed Sara and began to blush madly.  
  
"What type of movies do you like?" Randy asked.  
  
"Horror," Jenna and Sara said automatically.  
  
"What's your favorite scary movie?" Randy asked.  
  
"Probably Halloween," Sara answered.  
  
"Not Halloween H2O or the resurrection one." Jenna added.  
  
"You should be in a horror movie, Sara. You're face is ugly enough to scare anyone," Stu said with a smile of satisfaction.  
  
Sara gasped and sent St the darkest of looks.  
  
Jenna leaned over and whispered something to Sara causing her to grin evilly.  
  
"You know me to well," Sara said with a small smile.  
  
"Randy, If I didn't know any better I'd think these little ladies were plotting against us," Stu said as he eyed the girls suspiciously.  
  
"Good thing you don't know any better, right?" Jenna asked.  
  
"She speaks," Randy said with a surprised tone.  
  
"Wow! Looks like we're at our class already," Sara said with false enthusiasm.  
  
Stu sat next to Jenna who was sitting next to Sara. Then Randy sat next to Sara.  
  
"How are doing?" Stu asked Jenna as he watched other people walk in.  
  
Jenna blushed and squeaked out, "I'm fine. And yourself?"  
  
"I'm better now that I'm talking to you," Stu batted his eyes causing Jenna to laugh.  
  
"Can you not hate Sara too much? She just treats everyone who bumps into her like that," Jenna said as she stared into his dark eyes.  
  
Stu nodded and smiled.  
  
"Hello class, I am Mr. Connors and I teach film," A man wearing a plaid suit came walking in.  
  
"Nice suit," Jenna and Sara said together.  
  
Randy and Stu glanced at each other than Randy asked, "Are you two really clones?"  
  
"If we told you then you'd know," Sara said.  
  
"You four can stop talking," Mr. Connors said.  
  
"That's the first time someone's said that to you, right Jenn?" Stu asked.  
  
"Probably isn't your first time," Sara snarled at Stu.  
  
"You fours' names are?" Mr. Connors asked.  
  
"Stuart Killings," Stu said dryly.  
  
"Jenna Lively," Jenna stated softly.  
  
"Randy Doom," Randy hesitated slightly.  
  
Everyone stared at Sara. She cradled herself back and forth in her seat as she stared at the floor.  
  
"Redrum," Sara began repeating under her breath.  
  
"They're all going to laugh at you," Jenna began repeating in a shrieking tone.  
  
"They know," Sara said suddenly. She fell out of her chair and laid in the middle of the room, staring up at the ceiling.  
  
Jenna got up and raced to Sara's side.  
  
"What did you do?" Jenna yelled frantically.  
  
"I drank a bottle of rat poison," Sara answered in a croaky tone.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I want you to be happy," Sara cried. She shut her eyes and didn't open them again.  
  
Tears ran down Jenna's face as she checked Sara's pulse, "Oh my god! She's dead!"  
  
Everyone looked shocked and horrified.  
  
"I'll get a doctor," Mr. Connors said hysterically.  
  
"No need," Jenna said evilly.  
  
Randy and Stu sat there, amused.  
  
"Why not?" The teacher asked.  
  
"Because you don't need a doctor if your dead," Jenna pulled out a gun and aimed it at the teacher.  
  
The teacher began to sob as he closed his eyes tightly.  
  
Jenna pulled the trigger and water came out.  
  
Sara then jumped up and said, "We had drama yesterday."  
  
Jenna sat down in her seat when Sara did.  
  
Randy began clapping and Stu joined in.  
  
"Yo teach, the name is Sara Black. Remember that, okay?" Sara said to the embarrassed professor.  
  
~*~*~  
  
A/N  
  
Review please and thank you! I hope you found the last bit funny. You know I did! 


	4. Is that jelly on your collar?

Chapter 4: _Is That Jelly On Your Collar?_  
  
"Did you see his face when I aimed the gun at him?" Jenna chortled proudly.  
  
"No, I was dead, remember?" Sara reminded as she envisioned the teacher having a heart attack and smirked with a wild look in her blue eyes.  
  
"I think this might end up being another class we fail," Jenna said, wondering weather or not she should feel proud or distraught.  
  
"Boo fuckin' hoo!" Sara replied in a sing-song voice.  
  
"Hey Jenna! Wait up!" Stu called to them as he ran after them.  
  
"Damn. I had hoped we lost him," Sara declared under her breath with a sigh.  
  
"Be nice," Jenna commanded in a harsh whisper.  
  
"I'm always nice. I should get a gold star for niceness," Sara responded sarcastically.  
  
When Stu finally caught up with them he walked between him and praised, "That was great what you guys did in there!"  
  
"We try to please," Sara sighed, wishing the boy who now draped an arm around both girls' shoulders would go away.  
  
Jenna felt a slow blush creep up her pale cheeks when she had no choice but to support Stu's arm. She didn't know if she liked him touching her (even in such a casual way) or not. She dismissed everything and cackled dramatically, "The entire faculty shall taste our wrath!"  
  
"Too bad the whole rat poison thing didn't work out for ya, Sara," Stu said in false sympathy.  
  
Sara replied innocently, "I'll keep that in mind next time we go drinking." She elbowed him and stepped away, looking at his hand as if it was a rabid beast (which, in a sense, was exactly what it was).  
  
Jenna looked down at the ground, wanting to be a part of the conversation. She asked the first thing that came to mind, "So, where's Randy?"  
  
"I don't know. Possibly getting laid or filleted," Stu answered with a shrug. Realizing that he rhymed he started cracking up. When both girls sent him questionable stares he continued, still laughing, "Don't you get it? Laid rhymes with filleted." They didn't laugh with him, which made him add insecurely, "It's funny..."  
  
Before anything else could be said Kayleigh kind of popped up out of no where with the hyper greeting of, "Hey!!"  
  
"Hi Kayleigh," Jenna greeted happily, tilting her hand slightly in a wave.  
  
"Run Kayleigh!" Sara warned, "You mustn't meet the farm boy!"  
  
Stu mouthed the words "farm boy" in amusement, knowing that being from California hardly qualified him to be a farm boy. He shrugged and introduced himself, "I'm Stu."  
  
"Nice to meet you... I'm Kayleigh," The girl greeted, looking at him and the arm that still remained around Jenna oddly.  
  
"Stuart Killings," Jenna said suddenly, "That's an odd name." She paused and added, "I like it."

"Is the name German?" Kayleigh questioned with shifty eyes. "Are you a nazi?"  
  
"Not since last I checked," Stu answered.  
  
Jenna glanced everyone over then returned to looking at the floor ahead of her. She asked, "So, are you guys going to that one party tonight?"  
  
"Party?" He was immediately interested.  
  
"Yeah. This one blonde chick is throwing it like its 1984. I guess it's a Welcome Back To Hell type of thing," Explained Jenna, nodding with an all-knowing look. Sara just sent her a look that said silently, "Don't be talking about my people, bitch."

"We totally should throw eggs at people," Kayleigh suggested. When no one replied she said to herself, "It sounds good to me."  
  
They all stopped when they reached a door that had pictures of Matthew Lillard pinned to it. Jenna smiled at Stu and said jokingly formally, "Well, this is our living quarters, Stuart. Farewell to you."  
  
A wicked grin spread across his face when he realized all three of them lived together. He chuckled, "Alright. I'll hopefully see you tonight."  
  
After walking out from under Stu's arm Jenna opened the door. Sara shrugged and informed them, "I think I might go see Stevo."  
  
"Okay," Both girls said. Kayleigh started walking in the room as she said, "Tell Stevo I'll get him the blue hair dye tomorrow."  
  
Both of her friends entered their room, closing the door behind them. Sara sighed and started walking off in the same direction as Stu, crossing her arms around herself defensively.  
  
"Are you stalking me?" Stu sent the blonde a mistrusting stare.  
  
She ignored the question and asked boredly, "Are you and the Randster roommates?"  
  
"No. This one guy named Stevo is," Stu answered, sticking his hands in his pant pockets, wondering why Randy got to be called something with the suffix –ster. How come he wasn't The Stu-ster? 

"Stevo? Your roommate is Stevo?!" She questioned in disbelief. He nodded and she shrieked, "Damn the man!"  
  
"What's it to you?"  
  
"If he's a blue haired sex machine then your roommate is my boyfriend," She answered slightly proudly.  
  
"Hmmmm..." He opened his mouth to say something, decided against it and silenced himself.  
  
Quickly she accused randomly, "You have the hots for Jenna!"  
  
"Oh yeah? Is that so?" Stu made a face of contemplation then agreed, "Oh yeah! I guess so."

"Yeah? Well, no one is interested so keep your hormones in check, farm boy!"  
  
"I'm no farm boy..." He defended. Sara rolled her eyes and muttered boredly, "Whatever..."  
  
"What's your problem anyway?"  
  
She shrugged and answered, "I'm crazy."  
  
"I see that..." He paused at a door that had a poster of Ronald Reagan that said the words: "I am your puppet!"  
  
Sara immediately recognized the door and smiled sweetly, waiting for Stu to open the door. When Stu did she walked past him and entered the room happily. The room was kind of cut in half. On one half there were pictures of Reagan with bullet holes, anarchy symbols, and a beautiful blue haired man. Sara didn't even look at Stu's side of the room as she looked her boyfriend over.  
  
He was a tall, lean looking guy with untidy blue hair. On his wrists were cut up socks cuffs with yellow stripes and on his neck was a necklace of safety pins. He wore a faded blue and pink striped t-shirt (which matched his plaid jacket that sat beside him on the bed), a pair of dark blue pants and combat boots.  
  
He sat up on his queen-sized bed, smiling a dimpled smile at the newcomer. She quickly moved toward him, squealing, "Stevo!"  
  
"Hey baby," He greeted tiredly before the girl tackled and pinned him to his bed. Stu rolled his eyes and moved over to his own bed after closing the door.

Sara rolled off of him and lay beside Stevo. He turned to her, draped an arm around her waist and asked, "Have you met my roommate yet?"  
  
"Sadly, yes..." She answered, sending Stu an annoyed look. She forgot all about Stu when Stevo started kissing her neck gently.  
  
Stu rolled his eyes, clearly seeing the look Sara sent him. He then asked, "How do you put up with her?"  
  
"I have my ways," Stevo answered, kissing her roughly. She pushed him away and sat up, commanding, "Not now."  
  
Sara looked Stevo over happily, a proud smile on her face. The smile faded when her eyes landed on the blue collar of his shirt. On the collar were smudges of soft pink in the shape of lips. Quickly she asked, "What's that on your collar?"  
  
"Huh?" He looked down at his collar and a look of panic came and left on his face. He smiled to falsely reassure her, "Oh, it's just some of your lipstick."  
  
Stu, trying to act like he wasn't paying any attention, only watched them from the corner of his teal eyes. He watched as Sara shook her head violently, her hair flipping around madly. She reminded in an irritated voice, "I would never wear pink lipstick."  
  
Stevo couldn't think up anyway to explain himself so he just forced a kiss on her. Sara shoved him away and Stu snorted. Both Sara and Stevo looked at Stu with eyebrows raised. Stu smiled sheepishly back at them.  
  
Having their attention he decided now would be the perfect moment to create some controversy. He looked at Stevo innocently and asked, "How was Shannon last night?"  
  
Stevo sent his roommate a look that asked "What the fuck?" as Sara demanded to know lostly, "Who's Shannon?"  
  
"No one!" Stevo answered instantly. Sara sighed, rolled her eyes and got up off of the bed. She spoke softly, not knowing what to feel, "I'm just going to go now. We can sort things out later."  
  
She sent both boys dark looks before leaving them. Stevo stared at Stu in silence for a minute then snapped, "Damn it, man! Why'd you have to bring up Shannon?"  
  
"I just figured out how you put up with her, is all..." Stu shrugged as a wicked smile spread on his face. "You cheat on her..." He shook his head.  
  
0-0-0-0-0  
  
Author's Note:  
  
Well, my loves, I have edited another chapter. So everyone knows, Stevo is Matthew Lillard in the movie SLC Punk. So, basically Stu is living with himself, which is kind of weird when you think about it.  
  
Thanks for reading and reviewing!


	5. Death Threats And Lack Of Pity

A/n I'm sorry about my stupid story. It bites monkeys.  
  
Snickers evilly  
  
In future chapters aka the next chapter were going to party.  
  
Does the Snoopy dance to distract them  
  
Enjoy it my lovely readers,  
  
Sara the evil McChicken Snoopy  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Stu sat on his bed as he received dark looks from Stevo. There was a knock.  
  
Stevo got off his bed and opened the door eagerly. When he saw who it was he said dully, "Stu, its your friend."  
  
Randy walked in and walked over to Stu with a smile on his face.  
  
"What did you do this time? Lose your essence for living?" Stu asked.  
  
"Sadly, no. I have great news. There's this party tonight and it's a great shopping choice."  
  
"I already know. Jenna is going," Stu said with a grin.  
  
"Is Sara going to be there?" Randy asked casually.  
  
"Are you talking about my girlfriend?" Stevo asked sharply.  
  
"You actually care about her for once? Oh I forgot, Shannon isn't around so you care," Stu snapped.  
  
"Shut the hell up!" Stevo yelled.  
  
"Or you'll do what? Kill me?" Stu asked with a dark laugh.  
  
"Remember Stu, It takes a man to do something like that," Randy said sarcastically.  
  
"You tell Sara another thing about Shannon and I'll gut you," Stevo yelled.  
  
"Are you big enough to live up to your words?" Stu asked in a serious tone.  
  
"You'll find out when you're sleeping," Stevo threatened.  
  
"You just keep saying that," Stu shook his head.  
  
"I'm leaving," Stevo muttered frustrated.  
  
"Say hi to Shannon for me," Stu called out to him.  
  
"You were defending Sara, you know that don't you?" Randy asked.  
  
"She isn't that bad. Besides, she is our only chance with Jenna."  
  
"You still want to slit her throat, don't you?" Randy asked.  
  
"Yes I do," Stu sighed.  
  
"We're going to the party, right?" Randy asked eagerly.  
  
"You know it," Stu answered.  
  
"What are we going to do about your roommate?"  
  
"We're going to get Sara and Jenna drunk then we let them catch Stevo with Shannon," Stu said with a dark look.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Jenna, Kayleigh. I'm going to go talk to Stevo," Sara said slowly.  
  
"Kick his ass!" Kayleigh commanded.  
  
"Dump him and tell him I'm going to bite him," Jenna laughed.  
  
"That's just what I'll do," Sara replied.  
  
"You want us to come with you?" Kayleigh offered.  
  
"You just want to stop by Gerrit's room, don't you?' Jenna teased.  
  
"Maybe.." Kayleigh answered.  
  
"I'll be back in ten minutes," Sara aid as she walked out of the room.  
  
"Be strong," Jenna called out to her.  
  
Sara walked alone down the hall until she ran into Randy.  
  
"Hey Sara, what's up?"  
  
"I'm off to see my boyfriend," Sara said gloomily.  
  
"You sound happy," Randy replied.  
  
"I think he's cheating on me," Sara said.  
  
"Who would want to cheat on you?"  
  
"Your sweet, Randy."  
  
"I got it from all the horror movies I watch," Randy said with a smile.  
  
"That's where me and Jenna pick up our social skills," Sara laughed lightly.  
  
"If you and your boyfriend break up do you think you'd ever want to go out with me?" Randy stared at the floor.  
  
"I'm saving myself for Stu," Sara said sarcastically.  
  
"That's a no, isn't it?"  
  
"No, it's a I'll think about it," Sara answered.  
  
"Good."  
  
"Okay. I'm here so I'll see you later," Sara put her hand on the doorknob.  
  
Randy nodded and kept walking.  
  
Sara opened the door and let out a gasp, "What the hell?"  
  
Stevo sat on his bed with a preppy chick with blonde hair. They were kissing.  
  
Stevo jumped off the girl and looked at Sara in disbelief.  
  
"Who is she?" The girl asked in a snobbish tone.  
  
"I'm his girlfriend, you dumbass!" Sara yelled.  
  
"I thought I was your girlfriend," the girl smacked Stevo.  
  
"Girls, you don't mind sharing me do you?" Stevo asked.  
  
"I'm going to kill you," Sara shrieked as she turned to run.  
  
She walked into Stu and started crying, "Move!"  
  
Stu shut the door and said, "Do you really want to kill him?"  
  
"Leave me alone," Sara whined.  
  
"You want to cut him open, don't you?" Stu asked.  
  
"Yes, I do now leave me alone," Sara whined.  
  
"I'll see you at the party and we can all get drunk," Stu smirked.  
  
Sara ran off.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"What do you think happened?" Jenna asked.  
  
"Sara probably is crying. Then I'll see her and I'll start crying," Jenna replied.  
  
"Let's poison Stevo," Kayleigh laughed.  
  
"Let's kick his ass," Jenna punched her fist into her hand.  
  
Just then Sara walked in crying, "He was cheating on me."  
  
"With who?" Jenna asked.  
  
"Stupid preppy Shannon," Sara answered bitterly.  
  
"I'll be back. I'm going to kick his ass," Jenna and Kayleigh said together.  
  
"I want blood!" Sara pouted.  
  
Jenna and Kayleigh left and headed toward Stevo's room.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Jenna started banging on the door.  
  
"Open up punk," Kayleigh yelled.  
  
Stevo opened the door slowly, "Go away."  
  
Jenna pushed open the door and shoved him, "You cheated on Sara!"  
  
"You deserve a total ass kicking," Kayleigh yelled.  
  
Jenna punched Stevo in the face, "You will die."  
  
Kayleigh kicked him, "Jenna, remember Sara wants him to bleed."  
  
Jenna started punching Stevo until he was bleeding.  
  
"Let's go," Kayleigh said.  
  
Jenna walked away. Kayleigh kneed Stevo in the groin.  
  
"Have a nice day," Jenna called.  
  
~*~*~  
  
A/n  
  
I'm sorry that sucks. I was bored. Now im watching fear factor where they get needles stuck in them. 


	6. Boo hoo! MOW MOW!

A/n YAY! I get to write more. This chapter is going to have a big old party.  
  
I know you'll like it cuz you guys are in the story. Its going to be fun. We're breaking a rule though. And no, we are not loosing our essence.  
  
Does the Snoopy dance then end it with a split Guys, I'm stuck. HELP!!  
  
Anyway, I love you people,  
  
~Sara the evil McChicken eating Snoopy  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Jenna, must you wear your Tool shirt?" Sara glanced at the black Tool shirt Jenna wore.  
  
"Chester, must you wear so much eyeliner?" Kayleigh asked Sara.  
  
"There's nothing wrong with eyeliner," Sara and Jenna said together.  
  
The three girls began laughing impishly.  
  
"I'm cold," Kayleigh said suddenly.  
  
"Then take off all your clothes," Sara said for no apparent reason.  
  
"How bout not," Kayleigh replied.  
  
"Stu actually said he wanted to get us all drunk?" Jenna asked.  
  
"Yes he did," Sara said dully.  
  
"That would be breaking a rule," Kayleigh said enthusiastically.  
  
"We are all going to die," Jenna started shaking Sara's shoulders.  
  
"Can't wait," Sara lied back on her bed and hugged her Whinny the Pooh bear.(A/n-LOL! I actually have a ratty looking pooh bear and I actually act like this)  
  
"Sara! Let go of the bear," Kayleigh ordered.  
  
"Pooh bear is my only friend," Sara yelled.  
  
"Snoopy! We are your friends and just get over Stevo,' Jenna snapped.  
  
"Stevo loves me and he knows it," Sara yelled.  
  
"Get over it!" Kayleigh yelled.  
  
"I'm ugly aren't I?" Sara asked, poutilly.  
  
"No, Shannon is," Jenna rolled her eyes.  
  
"You're just trying to make me feel better," Sara snapped.  
  
"Let's go to the party, you can hook up with Randy and have a good time," Kayleigh said with a smile.  
  
"Fine!" Sara tossed her bear across the room.  
  
"You're not wearing that are you," Jenna teased.  
  
"Let's bring a carton of eggs," Sara smiled weakly.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Stu and Randy stood together in the crowded room.  
  
"Hi," A girl walked up to Stu and said in a flirty tone.  
  
"May I help you?" Stu asked.  
  
"Depends if your single," The girl said.  
  
"Here comes my woman now," Stu nodded towards Jenna who came in with Sara and Kayleigh.  
  
"Not for long," The girl turned and walked up to Jenna.  
  
"Hey freak, you better stay away from that guy over there," The girl pointed at Stu.  
  
"Right," Jenna replied slowly.  
  
Sara who stood behind the girl grabbed her finger and bent it back, "It's not nice to fucking point."  
  
The girl let out an 'owwww'.  
  
"Hope you like eggs," Kayleigh said.  
  
Jenna grabbed an egg and smashed it into the girl's head.  
  
Kayleigh started throwing eggs at random people as she laughed evilly.  
  
"You guys really are freaks," The girl quickly ran away.  
  
"We're proud," Sara yelled.  
  
"Jenna, why don't you go sit on Stu's lap?" Kayleigh teased.  
  
"Why don't you go sit on Gerrits lap?" Jenna teased back.  
  
"I will," Kayleigh walked over to the said Gerrit and said 'hi'.  
  
"Oh god, there's Stevo," Sara felt the tears swell up in her eyes.  
  
"Don't look at him," Jenna put her hand over Sara's eyes.  
  
Sara began backing away until she tripped and fell intro someone's lap, "Sorry."  
  
"You're actually apologizing to me?" Stu asked.  
  
Sara jumped up and hit someone, "Sorry."  
  
"Hey Sara," Stevo said bluntly.  
  
"Nice nose," Jenna pointed at Stevo's noise that looked pretty nasty.  
  
"What are you up to?" Stevo asked Sara.  
  
"She is spending time with her new boyfriend," Stu lied as he stood up and put his arm around Sara.  
  
"What?" Stevo, Sara and Jenna said together.  
  
"Go along with it," Stu whispered in Sara's ear.  
  
Sara nodded slowly. "Yeah Stevo, I'm with Stu now so fuck off!"  
  
Stevo stared in disbelief then said, "You're a slut, Sara!"  
  
Sara glared at Stevo then said, "Hold me back."  
  
Jenna stood in front of Stevo and head butted him.  
  
"Fuck! You bitch," Stevo yelled.  
  
"I'm going to kill you," Stu, Sara and Jenna threatened. "I'm fucking leaving!" Stevo yelled.  
  
"I think we're going to cry," Stu pouted.  
  
Stevo ran off with a pissed look.  
  
"Thanks Stu," Sara pecked Stu on the cheek.  
  
"Yeah. Thanks Stuart," Jenna smiled.  
  
"What? I don't get a kiss from you?" Stu pointed to his cheek.  
  
Jenna blushed madly and kissed Stu on the cheek.  
  
"Let's get drunk!" Sara said suddenly.  
  
"Wait, let me go find Randy then we'll get drunk," Stu said.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara sat in Randy's lap as she drank bud light.  
  
"What's with the light shit?" Stu grabbed the bottle and threw it behind him.  
  
"It's less calories!" Sara said with a head tilt.  
  
"Stuart, drink!" Jenna ordered as she gulped down some beer.  
  
Stu took a sip and nodded.  
  
"MOW!" Jenna yelled as she slapped Stu across the face.  
  
Sara fell off Randy laughing.  
  
"Are you okay?" Randy asked.  
  
Sara rolled on the floor laughing uncontrollably.  
  
"This is why women stay in the kitchen and bake pies," Stu stated.  
  
"Stu, I think you're cute," Jenna giggled.  
  
Kayleigh came stumbling by when she tripped over Sara.  
  
"I think I'm cute too Jenna," Stu laughed.  
  
Sara sat up suddenly and stared at Stu, "Stuey, we need to pretend we're having sex!"  
  
Stu raised his eyebrows.  
  
"I need to sleep in you room so when Stevo comes he can get jealous," Sara stumbled around.  
  
"Only if it can be a threesome," Stu nodded toward Jenna.  
  
Sara fell over laughing again.  
  
"I think there drunk enough," Randy glanced from Sara to Jenna.  
  
"Stuart, I think I love you," Jenna stood up and pointed at Stu.  
  
"I think I love me too, Jenna," Stu said.  
  
Kayleigh pushed Sara up then stood up herself. "Did you know that Gerrit still has his essence?"  
  
"God, you sound like Stu," Randy stated as Sara fell on him.  
  
"Kayleigh, go take away his essence," Jenna started laughing.  
  
"Randy, Stuey, I poisoned your beers," Sara said quickly as she drooled on herself.  
  
There was a silence.  
  
"HA! Happy April Fools Day!" Sara pointed and laughed.  
  
"No more alcohol for any of you," Stu said.  
  
"Snoopy! Snoooopy!" Jenna called out for no reason.  
  
Kayleigh started barking like a dog.  
  
"Let's take these little ladies home," Randy said to Stu.  
  
"Gerrit is taking me home!" Kayleigh snapped.  
  
"I have to pretend to sleep with Stu! I'm taking his essence," Sara tripped.  
  
"I want a whopper!" Jenna yelled.  
  
"Memo to self: Never give women beer," Stu said to himself.  
  
~*~*~  
  
A/n  
  
LONG LIVE US DRUNKEN FOOLS!!  
  
I am going to go watch Hackers now. JOY!  
  
I hope you like this chapter.  
  
For the love of Stu, Chip, Matt, Dennis, Stevo, Tim, and every other character Matthew Lillard has portrayed. Please review. 


	7. The Adventures of Mr Banana Man

A/n I'm going to write what happens when Stu takes the drunken Sara to his room. " This is a direct quote from my lovely clone: "Knowing you Stevo probably will walk in to see monkeys doing the limbo."  
  
I feel loved. Anyway, I am so happy. I just thought up the meanest ending for my 13 Ghosts fic. Im so mean to my readers, aren't I?  
  
I love you!  
  
~Sara the EVIL Loser  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara sat on Stu's bed, "Stuey, do you love Jenna?"  
  
Stu laughed as he eyed the drunken girl, "I like Jenna."  
  
"You want to kiss her! You want to love her! You want to molest her," Sara sang.  
  
"You have no idea how much I hate you drunk," Stu shook his head.  
  
Sara laid back on the bed as she stretched, "Stuey, am I mean?"  
  
Stu sighed, "To me, yes. To Stevo, yes. To Jenna, no. To Kayleigh, no. To Randy, no."  
  
"I'm not mean to you. I'm trying to be nicer," Sara replied.  
  
"I want to watch a movie," Stu jumped off the bed and grabbed a movie from underneath his bed.  
  
"That so better not be porno," Sara said.  
  
"Oh, it is. I'm trying to seduce you," Stu said sarcastically as he stuck the tape in the VCR.  
  
"The adventures of Mr. Banana Man, right?" Sara sat up and looked at the television.  
  
Yeah, I borrowed it from Randy," Stu laughed.  
  
The movie title came up and made Sara squeal. Horror Movies and How to Be and Beat the Killer.  
  
"How did you get this? There are only twenty copies in the world of this movie," Sara yelled in excitement.  
  
"You have no idea how hard it was to get this movie. Luckily Randy has connections," Stu stated.  
  
"I love this movie," Sara said with a smile.  
  
"How the hell have you seen this movie?' Stu asked.  
  
"Jenna has it."  
  
"Why would someone like you even want to see this movie?" Stu asked.  
  
"What the fuck do you mean by that? Are you calling me some prissy bitchy horror hater girl?"  
  
"No. I've dated girls like that and you aren't one of them," Stu didn't look away from the television.  
  
Sara turned her attention back to the movie, "We aren't dumbasses! We know not to shoot someone when we want to make it look like suicide."  
  
"I know. You only use guns when they have someone else's prints on them. Or if you are trying to make it look like they killed themselves after killing other people."  
  
"Guns are so damn stupid. They are sexist as hell. Be a real killer and use a traditional knife. Besides guns can be tracked back to you," Sara said slightly annoyed.  
  
Stu looked away from the movie. He turned and stared at Sara, "Have you ever killed anyone?"  
  
Sara laughed, "Do these look like hands that would kill people?"  
  
Stu glanced at her hands and said, "You're right. Only men kill."  
  
"Fuck you Stuart!"  
  
"You're going to start calling me Stuart too?"  
  
Sara nodded, "I prefer Stuey."  
  
Stu sighed, "Let's go to your room."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Jenna is there and I'm bored."  
  
"So you have the attention spanned of a five year old, too?" Sara asked.  
  
"Lets go," Stu grabbed Sara by the wrist. He pulled her out of the room.  
  
"It would be hilarious if we walked in my room to see Jenna and Randy having sex," Sara laughed.  
  
"Right," Stu pulled Sara down the hall.  
  
"You know what we should do? We should tell everyone we actually did have sex so we can end up gutted," Sara followed Stu unwillingly.  
  
"You scare me," Stu said.  
  
"When you asked me if I've killed anyone? I have," Sara said in an extremely serious tone.  
  
"Who did you kill?" Stu stopped and stared at her.  
  
"I killed two cats," Sara said with a grin.  
  
"Cats?" Stu repeated.  
  
"Yes. It was fun," Sara laughed.  
  
Stu started dragging Sara again.  
  
"I want to go see Randy," Sara said suddenly.  
  
"I want to go see Jenna," Stu kept dragging her.  
  
"We are acting like a couple," Sara said.  
  
Stu didn't say anything as he dragged Sara the rest of the way.  
  
Sara rolled her eyes and opened the door to the room.  
  
It was empty.  
  
"Where the hell are Jenna and Kayleigh?" Sara asked.  
  
Stu shrugged and walked in. He sat on the nearest bed that happened to be Jenna's.  
  
"Where the hell are they?" Sara asked as she laid down on her own bed.  
  
"Miss cat killer, I don't know."  
  
Sara threw a pillow at Stu, "Bite me."  
  
"No thanks," Stu breathed out deeply.  
  
"Have you ever killed someone?" Sara asked suddenly.  
  
Stu looked surprised as he nervously said, "Hell no."  
  
"You're so lucky I'm drunk and a dumbass right now or I'd be suspicious of you lying," Sara said.  
  
~*~*~  
  
I know this chapter doesn't have anyone but Stu and Sara but I felt like writing this crap. No worries, Ill try not to have Sara in the next chapter.  
  
Review please. 


	8. Detective Jones and Silent George

A/n I'm updating again. MUHAWAHA! All I have to say is, let the killings begin!!  
  
In other words Stevo's death want be mourned over. shrugs Like it wasn't obvious that Stevo would die.  
  
Hey Hey Hey, I forgot to tell you guys about this dream I had. (Did I tell you Jenna? I'm not sure.)  
  
Okay-I was in this supermarket on Halloween for some reason. And everyone was there like it was the hippest place to party. Then later on people were chasing Stu with knives, stabbing him just for fun. After they got bored of him they chased after me. I got away but in the end Stu stabbed me. How dare he.  
  
Anyway, I'm going to write the story now.  
  
Love you people!  
  
~Sara the evilly possessed Chucky doll  
  
~*~*~  
  
Jenna and Kayleigh walked down the hall towards Stu's room. It was morning now and they wanted to tell Sara something very important.  
  
"How are we going to tell her?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"Let's say it and not spray it," Jenna replied with a laugh.  
  
"You say that and I end up spitting on her," Kayleigh said with a shrug.  
  
Jenna smiled weakly as she continued to walk.  
  
"You don't think Sara will be all sad and crying, do you?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"Knowing Sara, yes."  
  
Both Jenna and Kayleigh suddenly stopped. Walking out of Stu's room was two men in suits.  
  
"We'll be seeing you soon, Mr. Killings," One of the men said to Stu who stood in the doorway.  
  
"It was nice meeting you officers," Stu said in false friendliness.  
  
"It was nice to meet you too. You also, Miss Black," One of the officers said in the false tone.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Stu and Sara slept next to each other in his bed. They faced away from each other and there was a huge gap between them.  
  
A knock came.  
  
Stu groaned as the knocking continued.  
  
"I'm up!" Sara yelled as she rolled off the bed.  
  
Stu sat up abruptly and groaned, "Who is it?"  
  
"Stuart Killings?" A voice asked formally.  
  
Stu blinked then said, "Oh yeah. That's me."  
  
He got up and opened the door to two men, "Can I help you?"  
  
"Are you the roommate of Stevo Pickle?" One of the men asked. (A/N-Im not sure if I gave Stevo a last name but I felt like this one would be perfecto!)  
  
Stu glanced over to the empty, unslept in bed of Stevo's. He nodded.  
  
Sara who had practically fallen asleep on the floor stood up and rubbed her eyes.  
  
Stu nervously glanced at Sara then back to the men, "Who are you?"  
  
"I am Detective Jones and that's Silent George, my partner," One of the men said. (A/N-I had to do that. I am sooooooo demented.)  
  
Sara stumbled around then said, "What happened?"  
  
"And you are, Miss?" Detective Jones asked Sara.  
  
Sara blinked then stuttered, "I'm Sara Black."  
  
Silent George glanced from Stu to Sara suspiciously.  
  
Sara, finally aware of her surroundings looked at Stevo's bed, "Where the hell is Stevo?"  
  
"That is what we are here about," Jones said.  
  
Stu sighed in relief. He then asked, "What happened to Stevo?"  
  
Sara's eyes filled with anxiety.  
  
"We found his body earlier this morning," Jones said slowly.  
  
There was a long pause until Sara began to sob lightly.  
  
"Was he murdered?" Stu stuttered.  
  
Silent George nodded.  
  
"Yes. His throat was penetrated with a knife," Jones said.  
  
"How do you know it was homicide? Couldn't he have stabbed his throat?" Sara asked as she rubbed her eyes.  
  
Silent George waved his hands to get attention. Then he ran his finger across his throat.  
  
"The way the throat was slit was from behind."  
  
Stu nodded but didn't know what to say.  
  
"Do you have any leads on who killed him?" Sara asked.  
  
Silent George shrugged and shook his head.  
  
"No. We have no leads yet. Did you know of anyone who wanted to harm Mr. Pickles?" Jones asked Stu.  
  
Stu glanced at Sara then began to think: Well, who didn't? I wanted to, Jenna wanted to, Sara wanted too, Kayleigh wanted to.  
  
"I have no idea. He was such a liked guy," Stu lied.  
  
Sara looked relieved for she thought he was going to say her name.  
  
Detective Jones looked at Sara and asked, "Did you know Mr. Pickles?"  
  
Sara sighed and said, "Yes, I knew him."  
  
"Do you know of anyone who might want to hurt Mr. Pickles?"  
  
Sara glanced at Stu and said, "Yeah. This girl named Shannon."  
  
Stu smiled weakly then said, "That's right. I heard her threatening him at this party last night."  
  
Silent George glared suspiciously at Sara and Stu. He paced in front of them slowly, stopping to point threateningly at them.  
  
"If you find out anything contact me," Jones said.  
  
Silent George glared at Stu and Sara as he handed them cards.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara hugged Silent George as he prepared to leave, "Silent George, you are my hero!"  
  
Silent George nodded then began to walk away quickly with Jones following.  
  
Jenna ran up to Sara and Stu with Kayleigh.  
  
"Were those cops?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"You know about Stevo, right?" Jenna asked.  
  
"Yeah. He got his throat slit," Stu said in a 'that's cool' tone.  
  
Jenna nodded, "Do they know who did it?"  
  
"It was Gerrit wasn't it?" Kayleigh laughed.  
  
"They don't know," Stu answered.  
  
~*~*~  
  
A/n  
  
I think I shall leave it there. I'm so sorry that it was dull as hell. No worries, the next chapter shall be better. Don't worry.  
  
Jenna- I'm going to tell you know so you don't bite me. You will be in the next chapter A LOT! Yes you will be with Stuart.  
  
Kayleigh- I think I'm going to have Sara punch Gerrit. MUHAWAHA! And no I swear it isn't cuz the real Gerrit said no. I'm going to gouge his eyes out with a plastic spoon.  
  
ROCK ON other reader! Your name is Shannon, right? See, I have a very strong relationship with my reviewers.  
  
I LOVE YOU GUYS! Oh yeah. I am very happy for I just saw Swimfan. Long live psychos who stock guys they have 'one night stands' with. Lol!  
  
I will update soon. Don't worry. 


	9. Whatever helps you sleep at night

A/n I'm updating yet again! I think I'm going to have Sara be all quiet and depressed for once. I'll have some Stu and Jenna action. You perverts! You better not be thinking of a different 'action' then me. This story is rated PG-13. Besides, I don't think I could handle Jenna stealing the essence of Stuart.  
  
Now, on to another subject that doesn't involve essence thieves. coughKayleighcough Lol! I'm only kidding. But then again who knows what Kayleigh did to Gerrit when he 'took her home'. LOL! I'm kidding. Thinks about it It would make sense though. Shrugs Oh well. I need to talk more to the 'readers' instead of myself.  
  
Hey, should I make the genre General/Humor? Or no? My favorite part of this whole story was when Jenna and Sara were showing everyone that Drama IS fun. Lol. It was so funny stealing the whole rat poison thing from 'The Curve'. Now I am going to write another dull boring chapter.  
  
~Sara the evilly possessed Chucky doll  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara stared at the floor and said slowly, "I am going to go for a walk. Don't follow me."  
  
"Too bad! I'm following you," Kayleigh followed Sara as she walked down the hall.  
  
Jenna sighed, "Thank god she isn't crying. You should see her. She mopes around all depressed and she yells at us when we do nothing."  
  
Stu nodded then remembered what he had to ask Jenna, "How did you get the movie 'How to Be and Beat the Killer'?" (a/n: Was that the title of the movie? I don't remember.)  
  
Jenna's eyes narrowed with suspicion, "How the hell do you know I have that movie?"  
  
"Sara told me," Stu replied.  
  
"Sara says a lot of things when she's drunk," Jenna said as she crossed her arms.  
  
"I'm not accusing you of anything, darling so calm down. Randy has that movie too," Stu said.  
  
Jenna relaxed a bit, "How did you get that movie?"  
  
"If I told you I would have to kill you," Stu answered half serious.  
  
"Not if I kill you first," Jenna laughed.  
  
"If the cops were listening then we'd become the prime suspects in Stevo's murder. You know that, right?" Stu said as he glanced up and down the halls.  
  
"And the fact that you and Stevo's ex were sleeping together wasn't suspicious?" Jenna asked.  
  
Stu looked shocked, "I hope you don't mean the same 'together' I'm thinking of right now!"  
  
"What exactly happened? Sara is a real idiot when she's drunk."  
  
"Isn't she always?" Stu laughed.  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes.  
  
"You really want to know what happened last night?" Stu asked.  
  
Jenna glanced around and said, "Why not."  
  
"Nothing, my dear." Stu answered in a British accent.  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes, "Do you think you can try and be a little subtle with your flirting?"  
  
"I can try, my darling," Stu grinned.  
  
"Didn't I tell you? I'm saving myself for Matthew Lillard," Jenna smiled.  
  
"Jenna?"  
  
"What?" Jenna asked.  
  
"My little cuppy cake, you wish to join me in a walk around the park?" Stu asked in the British accent.  
  
"You really need acting lessons."  
  
"My goal isn't to be a good actor. My goal is to be ridiculously good looking," Stu replied.  
  
Jenna laughed slightly, "Right."  
  
"Tell me, my little Lass. Do you think I'm really really ridiculously good looking?" Stu quoted Zoolander.  
  
"If it will help you sleep at night; Sure do," Jenna answered.  
  
"I want you to know that you just made my life complete," Stu smiled a big smile causing his dimples to show. (A/n: I love Matt's dimples! I LOVE MATT! He's mine despite the belief of his wife)  
  
Jenna gasped, "In that case we should get married."  
  
Stu raised his eyebrows, "I'm not ready for that kind of commitment."  
  
"What do you mean? You love me and I know it! We are going to be together forever!" Jenna yelled.  
  
Stu started backing away, "Did you forget your medication?"  
  
Jenna reached in her coat pocket and pulled out a gun, "If I can't have you no one will!"  
  
Stu smiled, "That wouldn't be the same gun you used in film class?"  
  
"No. This one doesn't shoot water," Jenna aimed the gun at Stu.  
  
Stu shook his head and grabbed the gun out of Jenna's hands, "I'm not stupid enough to fall for that again."  
  
Stu aimed the gun at Jenna and pulled the trigger.  
  
"NO!" Jenna yelled.  
  
A loud 'bang' sounded as he pulled the trigger.  
  
Jenna fell to the ground, "I told you it didn't shoot water."  
  
"Oh shit!" Stu yelled as he bent to the ground.  
  
Jenna had her had her hand holding her side, "I don't want to die! I just wanted you to love me forever!"  
  
Stu lifted up her hands to see blood.  
  
"Damn it!"  
  
Jenna's eyes drifted shut, "Stu. Always love me."  
  
Stu jumped up and paced around Jenna's body, "What the hell do I do?"  
  
As he paced around her body he suddenly was tripped.  
  
After falling to the ground he banged his head on the tile floor.  
  
~*~*~Flashback~*~*~  
  
"What are we going to do about Sidney?" Randy asked.  
  
"Why are you so worried? Everyone thinks she is out of her mind," Stu replied.  
  
"But she knows everything!"  
  
"Randy, Randy, Randy. No one will suspect us. I'm the boyfriend of one of the victims. You were shot. Who would suspect a cripple?" Stu asked with a grin.  
  
"I'm not a cripple!"  
  
"Sure you are! Anyway, we need to change our names for our new college because-"  
  
"I know why! I came up with the plan. We change our names so when people start getting killed we wont look suspicious. I mean how many times can one guy beat a cereal killer?" (A/n: Did you notice how I spelt Serial? You have to see Hackers to understand.)  
  
Stu rolled his eyes, "I know!"  
  
"My new name can be Clark Kent!" Randy said enthusiastically.  
  
"Please tell me you aren't going Superman on me!"  
  
"I would change my name to Charles Manson but that would be too obvious," Randy said with a shrug.  
  
"I am going to pick a very subtle new name. Stu Killings," Stu grinned.  
  
"I'll be Randy Doom," Randy said.  
  
"What a cool name you have there Mr. Doom," Stu sniggered.  
  
"I know. Der, Mr. Killings, der!" Randy mocked.  
  
"You better watch it or I'll gut your ass in a second!"  
  
"Stu!" Randy said.  
  
Stu looked at him.  
  
"Stu!"  
  
"What?" Stu yelled.  
  
"Stu get your ass up!" Jenna yelled.  
  
Stu's eyes shot open to see Jenna leaning over him.  
  
Stu blinked furiously to make sure he wasn't hallucinating.  
  
"Are you okay?" Jenna asked.  
  
"I shot you."  
  
"Yeah. You shot me with a Blood Cap," Jenna held up the gun.  
  
"A blood cap?" Stu asked.  
  
"It's shaped like a bullet but its plastic and filled with corn syrup," Jenna answered.  
  
Stu sat up and said, "You really scared the shit out of me."  
  
"When? When I 'died' or when I was talking about marriage?"  
  
"I was pretty damn freaked out at both times."  
  
"You handled killing me oh so well. You dumbass! You should have dragged my body in your room," Jenna rolled her eyes.  
  
"You sound like you know from experience," Stu eyed her suspiciously as he stood up.  
  
"No, I've just been friends with Sara for too long."  
  
"Are you saying that Sara knows from experience?" Stu asked.  
  
"No! She has seen way to many movies, that's all."  
  
"So, do you really love me?" Stu asked slyly.  
  
"Think what you want as long as it helps you sleep at night."  
  
"In that case. Let me see the tattoo you have. You know, the one with my name with a heart around it," Stu laughed.  
  
Jenna lifted up her sleeve to show the word 'Freak' printed on her arm.  
  
"Sara's says 'Evilness' and Kayleigh's is the Japanese sign for love," Jenna said.  
  
"What, I'm not good enough to have my name inside a heart?" Stu pretended to pout.  
  
"That's right."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Sara and Kayleigh walked side by side in silence. Sara looked sad.  
  
"Chester! You better smile!" Kayleigh ordered.  
  
"I can't smile. Its against my religion."  
  
"I like cheese!" Kayleigh squealed.  
  
Sara began laughing like a five year old.  
  
"You know what you should do, Snoopy McChester? You should go see Randy."  
  
"And you should see Gerrit," After Sara said this she made a 'Oooooh' sound.  
  
"Let's kill Katie for stealing Gerrit's essence," Kayleigh said. (A/n: No one but Kayleigh will think that one is hilarious. Kayleigh, We should kill Amy for stealing Joel's essence!!)  
  
Sara rolled her eyes, "I need to ask Jenna something."  
  
"Fine! Ignore me for your clone! I'll go see Gerrit," Kayleigh pouted.  
  
Sara began running off to find Jenna.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N  
  
I'm sorry that this chapter sucks. I know it sucks so don't lie to me and tell me it's 'good. Stop the lies!!  
  
Anyhoo. What did you lot think of it? I hope it wasn't too dull, boring, uneventful, unfunny.  
  
I must go. Good-bye! By the way. My new favorite thing to say is Lass. I dunt know what. 


	10. Kissing Doom

A/n Zoinks! I haven't update in forever. I shall do so now. Never fear!  
  
Why do people read this fic? By people I mean Kayleigh and Jenna. Too bad Jenna beat up her computer with a bat cuz the 'special' pictures of Matt took to long to load. LOL!!!  
  
Anyhow, I think that my story is disappointingly predictable. DON'T LIE! YOU KNOW ITS TRUE!!! YOU KNOW WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN! DON'T LIE!! Lol.  
  
Now that I'm done yelling at you lovely people I shall finally update..  
  
Much Love-Chester  
  
~*~*~  
  
Stu and Jenna stood together in the hall making small talk when Randy walked up to them.  
  
"Stu! We need to talk," Randy said in a serious as well as angry tone.  
  
Stu looked at Randy and said in a pissed off tone, "Yeah, we do!"  
  
Jenna eyed them both suspiciously.  
  
"I'll be right back, Jenna," Stu said as he dragged Randy in his room. He shut the door behind him.  
  
"I can't believe you killed Stevo.with out me!" Randy said in a harsh whispered.  
  
"What the hell do you mean? I thought you killed him," Stu whispered.  
  
Randy shoved Stu and yelled, "Don't fucking lie to me!"  
  
Stu glared at Randy as if ready to kill, "I swear on Tatum's grave that I am not lying."  
  
Randy laughed falsely and said, "If I find out that you are lying than your little girlfriend will find you're heart in her breakfast."  
  
Stu smacked the back of Randy's head and walked out of the room to see Jenna and Sara standing next to each other.  
  
Sara suddenly went silent as if Sara and Jenna were talking about Stu behind his back.  
  
"Hello, Randy," Sara said with a weak smile.  
  
"Why were you two yelling?" Jenna asked.  
  
Stu laughed nervously, "What are you talking about Willis?"  
  
"We heard yelling," Sara said bluntly.  
  
Randy looked at Stu quickly and said, "It was nothing."  
  
"She may be the blonde but I'm not. Why were you yelling?" Jenna asked.  
  
Sara pretended o be upset, "I am not a blonde! My hair is green! Cant you see?" Sara asked this as she pointed at her blonde hair.  
  
"We were not yelling about anything at all! Randy here just likes yelling so he thinks he has friends," Stu grinned, showing his very very very very very very very very sexy dimples.  
  
"Yeah, that's right. So, what were you two talking about?' Randy asked eagerly.  
  
Sara went pale as she looked at Jenna nervously.  
  
"We were talking about Stevo," Jenna answered.  
  
"I wonder who killed him," Stu said.  
  
Sara sighed and just walked into Stu's room without saying anything. Randy looked at Stu then Jenna and followed Sara. He shut the door behind him.  
  
"Damn it! I get locked out of my room," Stu said, annoyed.  
  
"Poor baby," Jenna rolled her eyes.  
  
"Let's go for a walk," Stu said dragging Jenna down the hall.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Randy looked around the room to see Sara lying on Stevo's bed, crying.  
  
"Go away, Stu! I don't care if this is your room," Sara snapped.  
  
Randy lay down on the bed next to Sara and looked at her. She looked at him and didn't say anything.  
  
"Whats wrong?" Randy asked bluntly.  
  
"Oh, I miss my hamster FiFi who died last year. What do you think I'm sad about?" Sara snapped.  
  
Randy smiled, "Don't cry over Stevo."  
  
She looked into his eyes, "I feel like I'm responsible for his death somehow."  
  
"You aren't responsible so don't worry about it," Randy rubbed her back.  
  
"Thank you," She said as she rubbed her eyes.  
  
Randy leaned over and kissed Sara lightly on the forehead. Sara smiled weakly and returned the kiss, on the lips.  
  
Sara sat up and Randy did the same. Sara laughed, "You are not getting anything from me in my dead boyfriends bed, Randy!"  
  
"Fine, Fine, Fine! Let's go over to Stu's bed then," Randy smiled.  
  
Sara kissed Randy on the cheek and stood up, "Thanks Randy."  
  
"No, no, no! Thank you, my Lady." (a/n: Notice how Randy is repeating things over and over and over again.)  
  
~*~*~  
  
Stu and Jenna walked together outside talking and 'stuff'. ((Do not ask why I put lil '' around the word stuff. MUHAWAHA!!))  
  
"So-" Jenna started slowly not really knowing what to say.  
  
"So?"  
  
"Isn't it odd that the night Sara wanted to make Stevo jealous he was killed?" Jenna said trying to make conversation.  
  
"Are you accusing your own clone of killing Stevo, Nancy Drew?"  
  
"No! I was just saying that its funny," Jenna said.  
  
((I really wanted to have Silent George waddle out from behind a tree and look at Stu and Jenna with a magnifying glass. Then he would ink at Stu and waddle off. Too bad I didn't. Hey, did you know I waddle. I dunno why.))  
  
"Yeah its so funny. Ah Ha Hoo Ha!"  
  
"Don't mock me, Stuart," Jenna said.  
  
"I will if I want, Jenna," Stu said as if he was five years old.  
  
Jenna laughed, "Okay Mr. Killings, what are we going to learn today? Oh yeah. We're going to learn to color. I know its tough but if you stay within the lines it will be all right."  
  
Stu shook his head, "Damn it! Why must you bring up the coloring? It's not my fault! Those lines were pretty damn tricky."  
  
Jenna smiled, "Stu, where are you from?"  
  
Stu stopped and glared at Jenna nervously, "Why do you ask?"  
  
"I was just wondering," Jenna answered.  
  
"I'm from.um.New York City. And you?"  
  
"Cleveland."  
  
"Tell me more about yourself," Stu commanded.  
  
Jenna leaned over to Stu and whispered, "I'm a vampire. Don't tell."  
  
"Please tell me your going to suck my blood," Stu said exposing his neck.  
  
Jenna started laughing and said, "Its not night yet."  
  
Stu glared up at the sky and yelled, "Sun, you bastard! Go down!"  
  
"You need to stop trying to seduce poor innocent me," Jenna said.  
  
"Only when the job is done," Stu said devilishly.  
  
Jenna raised her eyebrows, "I'll scream rape!" ((I just quoted Jay from Dogma!))  
  
"Anyway, you want to go watch a movie?" Stu asked.  
  
"Only if it has Matthew Lillard," Jenna smiled.  
  
"Lets watch your basic slasher movie like Jason."  
  
"And we can count how many times the dude outside in the car guys killed!" Jenna squealed excited.  
  
~*~*~  
  
A/N  
  
Sorry this sucked. At least I'm updating. Finally. Im sorry you aren't in this chapter Kayleigh. IM SORRY!!!! Lol. I hope this didn't suck much..  
  
Much love-Sara the Snoopy 


	11. Nearly Essencless

My clone inspired me here so If it sucks lets blame it on Jenna. Ha ha! Jenna was upset that She didn't get any 'action' with Stu. Its okay, I would be too.  
  
Ya know what would be funny? If they made a slasher flick where people who go into McDonalds die. They could call it 'No fries for you'. They kill people with pickles. I hate pickles.  
  
Anyway, this chapter has nervous breakdowns and 'action'.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Kayleigh woke and sat up to see Sara running around the room frantically. Jenna sat on her bed watching Sara in amusement. Sara was throwing things everywhere in frustration.  
  
"Looking for something?" Kayleigh yawned as she watched her crazy friend.  
  
Sara glared at Kayleigh and snapped, "Where the hell are my pills?"  
  
"Pills?" Kayleigh and Jenna asked in unison.  
  
Sara nodded violently, "My pills! If I don't take them I will seriously kill someone!"  
  
Jenna and Kayleigh exchanged horrified looks as they jumped up in search for the pills. Jenna looked under her bed and asked, "What are these pills for again?"  
  
"They control my temper," Sara punched the wall in anger.  
  
Kayleigh pat Sara on the back as she said, "Don't go killing anyone or you'll be looking suspicious."  
  
"Like I'm not suspicious looking already," Sara snapped.  
  
Jenna jumped up and said, "I think I found them!" She handed Sara the bottle.  
  
Sara glared at Jenna and said, "These are Flintstone Vitamins!"  
  
Jenna and Kayleigh started laughing childishly. Kayleigh squealed, "I've been looking for these! Jenna, how dare you steal them!"  
  
Sara glared at them before she collapsed on her bed, "You guys can go out and have fun. I'll stay in here completely isolated."  
  
A knock came at the door and Sara yelled, "Go away!" Kayleigh ran over to the door and opened it to see Stu.  
  
"Stu, this isn't a good time," Kayleigh warned as she nodded towards Sara.  
  
"Go away!" Sara yelled as she threw a pillow at Stu's head.  
  
"Calm down woman! I'm here to see Jenna," Stu entered the room.  
  
"What? Are you guys a couple now?" Sara glared at Stu.  
  
"No, were not a couple," Jenna walked toward the room's door.  
  
"That's not what I heard," Kayleigh laughed.  
  
"What have you heard?" Stu asked.  
  
"I heard that Jenna is having your baby," Kayleigh watched amusingly at Jenna's expression change.  
  
"Who said this?" Jenna sounded angry.  
  
"Just a bunch of preppy girls who like Stuart here," Kayleigh pointed to Stu.  
  
"They must die!" Sara laughed for the first time that day.  
  
"So are you saying that you're going to kill them?" Stu asked Sara.  
  
"You sound like a cop. I hate cops," Jenna commented.  
  
"Are you a cop?" Sara asked suspiciously.  
  
"Do I look like a cop? And what, you have a guilty conscious?" Stu returned the suspicious tone.  
  
"Shut up! I haven't killed anyone!" Sara screamed.  
  
"I didn't accuse you of killing anyone," Stu smiled arrogantly.  
  
Sara stood up and punched Stu in the face, "You bastard! I hate you!"  
  
Jenna moved in between Stu and Sara and yelled, "Enough! Stu, stop accusing Sara of killing Stevo! Sara, stop starting fights with Stu!"  
  
Kayleigh whispered to Jenna, "You should seriously take him out of here before Sara goes crazy."  
  
Jenna nodded, "Stu come with me and be nice!"  
  
Stu started walking behind Jenna. Before he exited the room he mouthed the word 'bitch' to Sara.  
  
"Sara, try and get along with Stu! You two keep fighting and it pisses me off!" Kayleigh sighed.  
  
"Kayleigh, please go so I can be isolated from people," Sara sat down on her bed.  
  
"I was going to see Gerrit anyway," Kayleigh said before she left.  
  
"I hate Stu!" Sara muttered.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Why do you have to piss her off?" Jenna asked as she walked down the hall with Stu.  
  
"Cuz' she pisses me off!" Stu tried to defend himself.  
  
"You two could be friends if you tried," Jenna sighed.  
  
"Jenna, do you like me?" Stu asked suddenly, changing the subject.  
  
"Yeah, your cool," Jenna answered.  
  
"No, that's not what I mean. Would you ever date me?" Stu looked at her eagerly.  
  
"I don't know," Jenna shrugged.  
  
At that moment Stu grabbed her face and kissed Jenna forcefully. Jenna was completely shocked but returned the kiss.  
  
Stu pulled away and grinned, "I guess you do know."  
  
Jenna started blushing violently, "So what know? Are we a 'couple'?"  
  
Stu grinned devilishly as he kissed Jenna again but this kiss wasn't as forceful. The kiss was gentle.  
  
Jenna pushed away and glanced down the hall. There were plenty of people there. She looked at Stu and said, "Can we go to your room?"  
  
Stu continued to smile devilishly as he led the way to his room. Once there he opened the door quickly.  
  
Jenna walked in the room and sat down on Stu's bed. Stu quickly sat down next to her. They sat there in complete silence for a few minutes.  
  
"So," Stu said as he looked at her in anticipation. Jenna looked at him and wrapped her arms around his neck.  
  
Stu grinned before he kissed her passionately. He picked her up and laid her on the bed. He crawled on top of her quickly.  
  
"He's like a dog that humps your leg," Jenna thought before she kissed him.  
  
Stu was moving quickly as if it had been years since he last had sex. He pulled off his shirt and threw it across the room He slipped his hands under Jenna's shirt as if about to take hers off but she stopped him.  
  
"Stu, I can't do this!" Jenna blurted out.  
  
Stu sighed as he asked, "Why not?"  
  
"I'm- I'm a virgin," Jenna looked at him in an ashamed way.  
  
"In other words you aren't ready?" Stu got off of her and she sat up.  
  
"I'm sorry," Jenna said uncomfortably.  
  
"Don't be," Stu sighed.  
  
"I got to go," Jenna stood up and left.  
  
Stu looked around the room to see a picture of Sara on Stevo's dresser. He glared at it for a moment before saying, "I hate Sara!"  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara sat in her room looking helpless when a knock came. She automatically yelled, "Go away!"  
  
"Open up! It's detective Jones," A male voice ordered.  
  
Sara looked terrified as she got up to open the door. Once the door was opened Sara burst into laughs. Randy stood there with a smile on his face.  
  
"You scared the shit out of me," Sara laughed as Randy walked in.  
  
"Kayleigh told me you are in a bad mood," Randy stated.  
  
"So you thought you could come and cheer me up?" Sara asked.  
  
"I'll do anything I can," Randy grinned.  
  
"I'm sure you will. And what do you think you can do to cheer me up?" Sara smiled weakly.  
  
"I can think of a few things," Randy started walking slowly towards Sara.  
  
Sara looked away from Randy and said, "Randy, tell me about yourself."  
  
He sighed and sat down, "What do you want to know."  
  
"First off, is Randy Doom your real name?" Sara sat next to him.  
  
"Yeah, it is. Anything else you want to know?" Randy didn't like having to lie about his past.  
  
"Why are you friends with Stu?"  
  
"Are you obsessed with him?" Randy asked.  
  
"No! I hate him! Why, are you jealous?"  
  
"What if I am?" Randy smiled.  
  
Sara returned the smile before she kissed him on the cheek, "You can do better then me."  
  
"I like you," Randy wrapped his arm around her.  
  
Sara enjoyed the feeling of being held by him. She felt so secure. Then the moment was ruined when Jenna and Kayleigh walked in. Kayleigh was crying.  
  
"What happened?" Sara jumped up and walked over to Kayleigh.  
  
"She saw Gerrit with another girl," Jenna answered.  
  
Randy stood up and patted Kayleigh on the back, "Don't cry over him. If he did it then he isn't worth it."  
  
"If Sara can cry over Stevo I can cry over Gerrit!" Kayleigh snapped.  
  
Sara looked a little taken back by Kayleigh's words, "If you want Randy will go beat Gerrit up."  
  
Jenna's eyes widened at Sara's words, "Randy, go beat Gerrit up. We need to talk alone."  
  
"Fine," Randy kissed Sara before leaving. Sara went slightly red as Jenna made a 'oooh' noise.  
  
"So you and Randy are a couple?" Kayleigh asked,  
  
"I don't know! I guess. But who cares about me. I want to know about Stu and Jenna."  
  
Jenna smiled and replied, "No comment."  
  
~*~*~  
  
HAHA! I just updated, I am so proud!! Did this totally suck? HAHA! You don't know what is going to happen! I do so haha! Do you still love me? I hope so!  
  
I think there will be another killing. MUHWAHA! Kayleigh, darling, im sorry about that hussy Gerrit.  
  
Much love, Sara 


	12. Virgins never die!

I hope you enjoy this chapter. And don't worry, Kayleigh. I shall show no mercy on that cheating hussy Gerrit!  
  
Much love-Sara  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sweetheart, don't cry. Pretend your okay but don't lie. You fall to the ground and I hear the sound- of a little girl crying. Forget the boy you once knew. Just love your trusted few  
  
"Forget Gerrit! He is a hussy!" Sara said sympathetically.  
  
"I hope Randy kicks his ass!" Kayleigh shook her head furiously.  
  
Jenna sat on her bed nodding, "Damn the man!" (That's an 'Empire Records' quote!)  
  
"Damn the day!" Kayleigh said half-heartedly.  
  
"Damn everyone in everyway," Sara said in a distracted way.  
  
Jenna smiled a wicked smile as she said, "I like Stu."  
  
"So your moving Matthew Lillard to the back of your heart for that turkey Stu?" Sara glared at Jenna as if she herself was Stu.  
  
Jenna opened her mouth but Kayleigh cut in, "Sara, did we interrupt anything between you and that nice Randy just now?"  
  
A sheepish grin appeared on Sara's face as she said, "Randy is nice but maybe too nice."  
  
"Oh god, is this you going through that whole 'bad boy' phase again?" Jenna asked.  
  
"I don't trust him. And if I can't trust Randy can you guess how I feel about Mr. Turkey?"  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Randy entered Stu's room without knocking. Stu looked startled but relaxed and asked, "What the hell do you want, ya big girl?"  
  
Randy narrowed his eyes into a glare as he replied coolly, "Sara doesn't think I'm a girl."  
  
"Oh shit, you raped that poor little girl, didn't you? Damn you! Now we'll look suspicious alright."  
  
Randy shook his head slowly and said, "Jenna was just crying about how you molested her to Sara and Kayleigh."  
  
Stu's eyes went wide, "She didn't! I didn't! I swear."  
  
Randy laughed, "You suck! You talk about how I 'raped' Sara when you were doing God knows what with her friend!"  
  
"I'll have you know I behaved! Don't want it to be the whole Tatum thing again. I slept with her and nearly fucked up the whole thing last time. Damn Sidney!"  
  
"Don't sleep with Jenna! This is a new movie and you're a new character. Remember! Virgins never die!"  
  
"Virgin's never die? Then I guess your safe," Stu snorted.  
  
Randy opened his mouth and paused before saying, "I came here for a reason! I found the perfect victim!"  
  
Stu raised his eyebrows slightly, "I'm listening."  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Kayleigh, me and Sara have to get to Film now. Will you be okay?" Jenna asked.  
  
"I'll be dandy. I'll sit here, get drunk, do some drugs, then maybe read the Bible," Kayleigh smiled.  
  
Sara nodded in agreement, "Well, have fun, dear."  
  
Jenna opened the door and started walking with Sara tagging along. She sighed and asked, "Sara, do you think Stu likes me?"  
  
Sara snorted, "Must you ask? He is like your stalker."  
  
Jenna grinned, "Stu is kinda cute, you have to admit."  
  
Sara made a disgusted face, "Don't make me barf. So, are you still a virgin? Cuz if you aren't your going to die! Remember, Virgins never die!"  
  
"Virgins never die? I don't think your safe then." (LOL! Can you say 'Deja vu'?)  
  
"I resent that!" Sara yelled right before she tripped on something and fell to the ground. She glanced up to see 'that turkey' Stu.  
  
"Looks like someone tripped you," Stu said arrogantly.  
  
"Jenna, make him stop," Sara whined as she stood up from the ground.  
  
"Stuart, stop it," Jenna said as she rolled her eyes.  
  
Stu glared at Sara and asked, "What are you going to do next? Tell my mommy?"  
  
Sara smacked Stu right across the face and said before walking off, "Stuart Killings, you will regret this day!"  
  
"I'm shaking," Stu called out to her. Then he coyly slipped his arm around Jenna.  
  
Jenna pulled away and said, "Stop being mean to Sara." With her words she ran off in the same direction as Sara.  
  
"Sara will pay," Stu declared.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara entered Film with a determined look on her face. Soon Jenna came walking in with a sad look. She waltzed over to Sara and sat down. Sara ignored her as she glared at the floor.  
  
"Sara, I'm sorry about Stu," Jenna said in a faltered tone.  
  
"Stu will suffer," Sara said with a nod.  
  
"Good to know," Said a cocky voice. Sara glanced up to see Stu to her dismay.  
  
"Stuart, shut up. Don't say anything," Jenna kept looking from Sara to Stu.  
  
"Okay, Mom," Stu took the seat next to Jenna.  
  
"Where's Randy at?" Sara asked.  
  
"He is sleeping around, you know how it is," Stu said in an emotionless tone.  
  
"Liar," Sara replied coolly.  
  
"You just wait and see if he shows up for class."  
  
"Stu, I told you to shut up!"  
  
He smiled and nodded as if to say 'I'll be good.' At that moment Mr. Connors walked in. He sent Sara and Jenna a terrified look before he rushed out of the class.  
  
Jenna grinned evilly, "Do you think we did something wrong?"  
  
"I haven't seen fear in the eyes of a grown man for days," Sara cracked her fingers.  
  
"That's a reassuring thought," Stu muttered.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Okay, I'm going to leave it there. Gerrit dies in the next chapter, I promise!! 


	13. Premurder Jitters

Okay, this chapter is w/ out Jenna, Sara and Kayleigh. How sad.. But, the good news is we all get to get drunk again! I don't know why but drunkenness is so fun to write. So you two know, this story had many many many chapters to come.  
  
Much love-Sara  
  
~*~*~  
  
Randy walked into to Stu's room to see Stuart Killing's himself sitting on his bed with an eager look on his face. Randy locked the door behind him as he tossed a black bundle on Stevo's unoccupied bed.  
  
"Our victim is going to a party tonight," Randy declared as he flopped down on Stevo's bed.  
  
Stu stood and walked over to his dresser. Once there he grabbed a box off the top of it. He placed the box on the floor between them.  
  
"You brought the outfits I brought the tools," Stu reached in the box and pulled out a knife.  
  
Randy grabbed the bundle he brought and shook it out. With the shake a 'Ghost face' mask fell into clear view. He shook his head and commented, "Why couldn't we do something a bit more original?"  
  
"Your mom," Stu replied as he searched through the box.  
  
Randy rolled his eyes before saying, "Sara is going to the party. You know that means Kayleigh and Jenna are going to be there, too."  
  
"For once I'm trying not to think of girls and you can't shut up about them!" Stu was getting annoyed that he couldn't find the fucking gun.  
  
"I was just wondering if that means we're going to be at the party as ourselves rather than creepy ghost faced killers."  
  
"Sure we'll go as long as we don't fuck up the plan by drinking," Stu answered as he still looked for the gun.  
  
"And as long as you don't fuck Jenna." Randy muttered.  
  
Stu's frantic searches came to a sudden stop. He glared at Randy and asked slowly, "What did you say, bitch?"  
  
"I already told you, Stu! This is a new movie meaning a clean slate, okay? Virgin's don't die! Therefore, stay a virgin," Randy rolled his eyes as though he shouldn't even be explaining this.  
  
"Virgins never die, huh? Sidney lost her 'essence' and is still living!"  
  
"She might as well be dead." Randy smiled somewhat evilly.  
  
"What the hell is your problem today, you big girl?" Stu asked as he returned to his search for that damn gun.  
  
"Nothing's my problem! Okay?"  
  
"Pre murder jitters, I suppose," Stu said as he kicked the box slightly.  
  
"You don't seem to be calm either, Stu."  
  
"I finally found it!" Stu exclaimed before reaching down to the ground and picking up the handgun.  
  
"Why do you get to carry the gun?" Randy asked.  
  
"Because its my fucking gun.."  
  
"Fine, then! If anything goes wrong tonight, I'll blame you seeing as you'll have the gun," Randy rubbed his head in frustration.  
  
"Good thing nothing will go wrong then, huh?"  
  
"Don't get cocky! It's a common mistake most killers make. They, thinking they've won reveal their modems to the 'victim' who gets away and end up dying in a totally ironic way."  
  
"Dude, your really paranoid. Maybe you do need to drink a little. Loosen up, okay?"  
  
"I am loose!" Randy responded tensely.  
  
"Whatever, man. Just get everything ready to go. We have a party to go to,"  
  
~~~  
  
Okay, that was short. But hey, I promise to update soon.. 


	14. Canadian Essence

Okay, dudeness! This chapter is going to be interesting. And, better yet- Us three are gonna be in.   
  
~Sara the psychotic Q-tip  
  
~*~*~  
  
Jenna, Kayleigh, and Sara stood in the entrance of party. Each sported a different look upon their faces. Kayleigh looked depressed and eager to drink. Sara looked emotionless as she rolled her eyes whenever someone looked her way. Jenna just looked everywhere; most likely looking for Stu.  
  
"Why did we come again?" Sara asked as she pushed someone out of her path as she made way to the kitchen.  
  
"I came to get drunk," Kayleigh answered as she glanced around.  
  
"I hope Stu comes," Jenna said as she looked around some more.  
  
Sara stopped walking so suddenly that Kayleigh walked into her, causing Jenna to walk into Kayleigh. Sara brushed herself off from the collision and glared at Jenna.  
  
"What?" Jenna asked in an annoyed way.  
  
"You better not even consider losing your essence, Missy!" Sara ((LOL! I almost wrote Satan)) shook her fist angrily.  
  
"Speaking of which, I lost my essence." Kayleigh said with a small smile on her face.  
  
"What?!" Sara and Jenna said in a shocked unison.  
  
Kayleigh reached in her purse and pulled out a bottle of water, "Found it!"  
  
Jenna took the bottle out of Kayleigh's hands and read out loud: "Canadian Essence.Bottled water."  
  
The three of them laughed a tad bit too demented for the sane people around them's liking. Jenna stopped laughing when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned around to see Stevo's "mistress", Shannon.  
  
Jenna's eyes glared at the preppy bleached blonde and asked, "May I help you?"  
  
"I heard you and Stevo's roommate are pretty hot and heavy," Shannon said in a 'I'm attempting to be subtle causing me to be even more obvious' voice.  
  
Jenna glanced at Sara to see her ready to pounce. Sara was shaking with rage as she yelled, "Why do you care, bitch? Stevo wasn't enough for you?!"  
  
"No, Stevo was plenty for me. Ask the other girls he was cheating with," Shannon said coldly.  
  
Jenna smiled evilly as she whispered to Shannon, "I suggest you run now."  
  
When Jenna finished the warning Sara didn't hesitate to lung at the poor unsuspecting bleach blonde. She immediately attempted pulling Shannon's hair out of her scalp as she kicked and kneed her.  
  
Soon, Shannon was bleeding, a lot, and Sara was being dragged off of her. She looked to see who was dragging her and saw Randy there. She pushed away from him and kicked Shannon in the face as she yelled, "BITCH!"  
  
Shannon was crying as some of her friends helped her off the ground and carried her as far away from Sara as possible. Sara was laughing sort of psychotically. She stopped when she looked back at her 'homies'.  
  
Jenna smiled a similar crazed smile to Sara's. Kayleigh a little uneasy at first then laughed loudly. Randy looked completely shocked.  
  
Jenna, noticing Randy for the first time, asked, "Where's Stu?"  
  
Randy, not taking his eyes off of Sara, replied, "He'll be here, I swear."  
  
"Dude, that reminds me!" Kayleigh said with a nod. She reached into her purse and pulled out a permanent marker and grabbed Jenna's arm.  
  
"What are you doing?" Jenna asked as Kayleigh rolled up the black sleeve of Jenna's shirt.  
  
"Writing something vital," Kayleigh answered as she began to write.  
  
When Kayleigh finished Jenna read aloud, "You take my essence, you take my life."  
  
Jenna laughed and said, "I'm sure it be worth it though."  
  
Kayleigh smiled evilly as she took Jenna's other arm, rolled up the sleeve, and began writing. When she finished Jenna read, "Beware, I have Krabs!"  
  
Jenna gasped and looked like she was gonna strangle Kayleigh as she said, "Run for life, Kayleigh."  
  
Kayleigh didn't hesitate before running off, with Jenna following.  
  
Randy still stood there, staring at Sara. Sara stared back with a mischievous look in her eyes. Randy broke the silence when asking, "Can we talk somewhere, alone?"  
  
Sara nodded slowly.  
  
~~~~  
  
I'm sorry! We'll get drunk soon! And it will get really really interesting. 


	15. The Scooby Gang

Okay, niftyness! Guess what? This chapter will be fun...  
  
~*~*~  
  
No words were spoken between Sara and Randy until they reached an unoccupied bedroom. Randy sat on the bed and Sara plopped herself down beside him. He starred at her in the silence.  
  
Sara kept on glancing at him then away until she finally asked, "What do you want, Randy?"  
  
Randy placed his hand on hers and asked, "You really beat the shit out of that chick."  
  
A dark look crossed over her face, "And she'd be dead if it wasn't for you meddling kids!"  
  
A small smile appeared and disappeared on his face as he asked completely seriously, "Do you really want her dead?"  
  
Sara leaned her head on Randy's shoulder and sighed, "Yes."  
  
"Do something about it then," Randy softly kissed Sara on the forehead.  
  
Sara scooted away slightly and asked, "Are you suggesting murder?"  
  
Randy looked at the ground and answered, "No, murder is bad."  
  
She rolled her eyes and scooted back next to him. She kissed him on the cheek and said, "I like you, Randy."  
  
He smiled and kissed her tenderly. When he pulled away he said, "I like you too."  
  
She frowned, "See, that is the problem! You are too good to be true. It's pissing me off!"  
  
He looked a little bit confused as he asked, "How the hell am I too good to be true?"  
  
"Your way too nice and compassionate. I don't deserve you," She answered with a distant look.  
  
He kissed her again but this time she pushed him away and yelled, "Stop it!"  
  
"What's your problem? We like each other!" He was sounded a little angry.  
  
She stood up and glared at him, "I am not in the mood! I'm pissed off right now! Besides, I have something to settle right now!"  
  
"FINE!" He stood up too and continued, "Forget this happened. Carry on with your life!"  
  
As he headed toward the door she said slowly, "Randy, stop it!"  
  
"Screw you, Sara!" Randy said angrily as he opened the door and left Sara standing there alone thinking 'What the fuck just happened?'  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Kayleigh and Jenna stood in the crowded kitchen, both holding half drank beers. Kayleigh was laughing at nothing in particular as she sipped her beverage. Jenna was still looking for Stu.  
  
Jenna glanced at Kayleigh and said, "That was awesome seeing Sara wail on Shannon. I really want to wail on someone. But who?"  
  
Kayleigh didn't really have to think about it. She answered quickly, "Gerrit!"  
  
Jenna thought about this and agreed, "Okay, as long as we can kick Shannon's slutty ass after!"  
  
"Agreed. Cheers!" Kayleigh said and bashed her plastic cup to Jenna's.  
  
Jenna chugged down the remainder of her drink and Kayleigh did the same. Once they were done Jenna said, "Lets go kick some ass!"  
  
They headed off to the living room and looked around the room at everyone. No Gerrit or Shannon. They wondered around aimlessly still not seeing a victim.  
  
Jenna asked, wonderingly, "What do you think Sara and Randy are doing?" She regretted asking it.  
  
Kayleigh laughed and answered, "They're probably taking part in some post- ass kicking essence losing."  
  
"God, I hope not! The death of our friend would be much mourned," Jenna wandered down to the living room again.  
  
"I think she has a little bit of sense! She knows if she loses her essence she will fall down dead. You on the other hand need to have 'I have Crabs' written on you for your own protection," Kayleigh looked around the room again with new results.  
  
Gerrit sat on the couch talking to random people. Jenna apparently noticed him too because she had a look of darkness overcome her as she headed toward him. Jenna was stopped when an arm wrapped itself around her waist. She looked to see whom the arm belonged to and was very happy to see it was Stu's!  
  
"Hey beautiful!" He sounded a little bit grave but he kissed her anyway.  
  
As Jenna returned the kiss Kayleigh asked, "What the hell, Crabs girl? We have an ass kicking to take care of."  
  
Both Jenna and Stu pulled away from kiss and said in unison, "Crabs?"  
  
Jenna laughed uneasily as a blush crept up her face. She kissed Stu quickly and explained, "I don't have crabs! She is just protecting my essence! But yeah, we are going to kick Gerrit's sorry ass for hurting Kayleigh."  
  
Stu's eyes widened but they didn't notice as he thought: If they kick his ass then they will look like suspects.  
  
"So, Stuart, you stand here because this wont take long," Kayleigh glared at Gerrit who was yet to see them plotting against him.  
  
Stuart said the first thing that came to mind, "I gotta secret to tell you two!"  
  
Kayleigh and Jenna both stopped their pursuit and asked in a curious unison, "What kind of secret?"  
  
Stu grinned and said, "Lets go talk about the secret in private, okay?"  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and led the way to the stairs so they could have privacy. Once they got in an empty room Stu and Jenna sat on the bed. They looked at each other with mischievous eyes. Kayleigh noticed this and said 'Make way!' before she sat down between them. Stu laughed a little.  
  
Jenna didn't hesitate to ask, "What's the secret, Stuart?"  
  
Stu had no idea what secret he would give them so he asked a question, "Where is the demon that completes the trio?"  
  
"Doing God knows what with Randy!" Kayleigh answered with a chuckle.  
  
"What?" Stu was freaking out because Randy was yelling at him with that 'Virgin's Never Die!' bullshit.  
  
"Sara kicked this chicks ass then she and Randy went upstairs together," Jenna answered, beginning to worry for Sara.  
  
Kayleigh smiled a cheerful smile and said, "She could have killed Shannon if meddling Randy hadn't pulled her off."  
  
Stu nodded and asked, "Isn't Shannon the one who Stevo was screwing? Poor fellow.. First he has to put up with someone like Sara then he gets killed."  
  
Jenna was annoyed that Stu, yet again, was mocking Sara so she decided to say something to scare him, "I personally think you have deep feelings for Sara. They say you hurt the one you love."  
  
Stu's eyes widened as he shook his head furiously, "You know what? I think we should go find Randy and Sara and save them from death."  
  
Kayleigh stood up, clapped her hands together, and said, "Agreed! It would be anti cool if they were killed in a freak accident!"  
  
Now that Kayleigh didn't block them from one another Jenna and Stu leaned in and kissed. Kayleigh rolled her eyes and said, "She has crabs!"  
  
They pulled away quickly and stood up. Jenna smacked the back of Kayleigh's head and said, "Lets go save our friends."  
  
Stu lead the way out of the room in pursuit of his enemy and his partner.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Okay, so its been forever since last I updated. Sue me! Except for don't 'cuz you'd get no money if ya did.  
  
Sorry Jenna that you have your essence. Sorry Kayleigh that Gerrit is still living. For three chapters now I've been promising to kill Gerrit in the next chapter. I'll just stop promising.  
  
Awww! I pissed Randy off. THAT ROCKS!!! 


	16. Doom Is Doomed

Authors note:  
  
Did you know I have seen Scream three times on television in the past week?  
  
It's been great. But each time I watch it I start right when lovely Stu says 'You bring the food, alright?' then does that little dance thing.  
  
Jenna, you lucky lucky girl... I could have had Stu but I've handed the torch down to you, Missy! And I get Randy. I think in the next chapter (Killing!!!!!) I will bring our two favorite killers to character more... Muhwaha! Sorry if this chapter is boring... I'm just defacing Randy and all...  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Sara sat on the bed, thinking. She shook her head and rolled her eyes and mumbled to herself, "God, can Randy be anymore melodramatic? I did this for your own protection, moron."  
  
She sighed and stood up from the bed, now standing in the dark, plotting against the world. Wait, not the world, but a stupid slut named Shannon. Suddenly, the darkness of the room disappeared as a flood of light came from the now opened door.  
  
"AHA! We found you!" rejoiced a familiar voice followed by Stu, Jenna, and Kayleigh entering the room.  
  
Stu started looking around the room and asked, "Where the hell is Randy?"  
  
Sara shrugged and answered, "I don't know. He ran off all angry around a half an hour ago."  
  
"Does that mean you're not going to die in a freak accident?" Kayleigh asked suspiciously.  
  
Jenna narrowed her eyes, stared at Sara for a few minutes then said, "She has her essence."  
  
"How do you know?" Sara asked, hating to be predictable.  
  
Jenna smiled, "Why else would a guy be angry? Obviously he wasn't getting any."  
  
"Randy was angry?" Stu asked then thought: If he starts killing people without me, he is going on the list!  
  
Kayleigh pranced around Sara, clapping and saying in a singsong voice, "Yay! You're not going to die! All is good!"  
  
Stu sent Sara a dark look that basically said 'Yeah your alive, until I do something about it.' He asked her with a tone to match his stare, "Where did Randy go?"  
  
Jenna, being annoyingly cheerful, petted Sara's head and said in a voice one would use when talking to a child, "Yeah Scooby, where is he? Sniff him out and maybe I'll give you a Scooby Snack."  
  
"Why should I bother him when he is being all pissy?" Sara shrugged as she watched Kayleigh (who still pranced slightly) out of the corner of her eye.  
  
"Aww no, did you and Randy break up?" Stu mocked.  
  
Kayleigh, placing her hand firmly on Sara's shoulder to prevent her from lunging at Stu and said, "Let's go find Randy or kick someone's ass."  
  
"Let's do both!" Jenna walked over to Stu, grabbed his hand and dragged him to the door.  
  
Stu draped his arm around Jenna's waist stiffly and said, "We will find Randy first, okay?"  
  
"Hey wait up!" Kayleigh called out pleadingly then added, "Come on, Scooby."  
  
Sara slowly followed and muttered to herself, "Darn those meddling kids."  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Okay, he isn't anywhere downstairs." Kayleigh said with a shrug of the shoulders.  
  
Sara, standing away from the group with her arms crossed over her chest said blankly, "Perhaps he is off sulking in one of the rooms. Or he might have left."  
  
He wouldn't leave, Stu thought, so he must be in one of these rooms. Stu glanced over to Jenna and said, "Let's go find him, Jenna."  
  
"Why is it so important? It's a party and usually around now we get drunk and you try to seduce me," Jenna arched her eyebrows skeptically.  
  
Apparently he wasn't going to say 'Oh, I need to find Randy so we can kill people' so he said, "I'd feel better to know where the little psycho is."  
  
"Whatever," Jenna said simply and took a step towards the closest door.  
  
"Wait!" Kayleigh squealed, "What if someone is in there doing something I don't really want to see?"  
  
"Just cover your eyes and ask if he is in there," Sara suggested.  
  
"Good plan, Snoopy," Kayleigh said giving her friend two thumbs up.  
  
Stu placed a hand over his eyes and opened the nearest door with the other. Still shielding his eyes he walked into the room and said in a blind way, "Randy, are you in here?"  
  
An out of breath male voice said, "Hey, get out of here, dick!"  
  
That definitely isn't Randy, Stu thought as he made a mental note of killing whoever the hell called him a dick.  
  
Stu quickly exited, uncovered his eyes, securely shut the bedroom door and said, "Unless Randy is getting laid he isn't in there."  
  
Sara, half tempted to make sure Randy wasn't getting laid just nodded in a 'whatever' way while saying, "Let's keep on trucking."  
  
Jenna led the way to the next door and gave Stu a look implying that he should go on in. Stu shook his head and said, "I'm not doing that again. You go."  
  
Jenna raised her hands in the air defensively while saying, "I am definitely not!"  
  
Kayleigh and Sara looked at each other for a moment before Sara, who wanted to find Randy and apologize said, "I'll go then, you pansies!"  
  
Kayleigh smiled in a relieved way and said with two thumbs up, "That's the spirit, Scooby!"  
  
Sara flashed her comrades an out of character cheesy smile and covered her eyes as Stu had. She opened the door with her free hand, walked in and closed the door so her friends wouldn't have to witness anything unholy. She heard familiar voices speaking and asked, "Is anyone having sex in here?"  
  
Whoever one of the voices belonged to quickly, with out thinking said, "No."  
  
Sara uncovered her eyes and looked absolutely shocked at what she saw. Her voice shook slightly as she called out, "Randy?"  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"Screw you, Sara!" Randy had yelled earlier, leaving Sara.  
  
He walked with an angry look on his face and thought: Sara needs to work on her issues. Maybe she should get some tissues. But whatever! I don't care!  
  
"Excuse me? Ummm, Randy?" A female voice said from behind him. The voice sounded familiar to Randy so naturally he assumed it was Sara.  
  
He whipped around and was greatly disappointed with who he saw. Standing in front of him was a very disgusting looking Shannon. Her face was red and swollen and her nose continued to bleed from Sara's attack. Her face was wet as though she splashed her face with water and some of her bleach blonde hair was brown and matted to her face. Her eyes still had their bitchiness to them though.  
  
Now that she knew she had his attention she said, "I saw you with Sara..."  
  
Randy, still pissed at Sara said defensively, "I am not with Sara!! Why do you care anyway?"  
  
Shannon, even looking ghastly, tried to put on a flirty air as she spoke, "I have some unfinished business with her. So, where is she, cutie?"  
  
Randy mouthed the word 'cutie', shook his head and said with a laugh, "Listen, I don't know why you hate Sara so much but I think you should leave her-..." Randy thought for a minute and realized he was pissed at Sara and added, "You go ahead and do whatever you want to Sara. I don't care."  
  
Shannon made a surprised expression and asked, "Did you two have a fight?"  
  
Randy, getting annoyed by her questions asked rudely, "Don't you have to go rape someone?"  
  
Shannon looked a little taken aback but quickly smiled the fakest smile and said, "You two did have a fight. I can tell. And if you ever want to make Sara mad, I'm here for you."  
  
You could tell she wanted to get back at Sara desperately and Randy wondered what she had in mind so he asked her. Her answer was, "You and I could make her jealous. You know, we could do stuff."  
  
Randy felt disgusted but still thought about it. He was really angry at Sara right now. Even if he didn't like Shannon revenge would be sweet... Before he more thoroughly thought of the possibilities he said, "Okay, lets do it."  
  
Before he knew it she led him back into an unoccupied room and watched him seductively while asking, "What do you want to do?"  
  
Randy cringed when he looked at her and shrugged while saying, "I don't know. What do you want to do?"  
  
"I might have a few ideas," She said as she plopped herself onto the flat surface of a wooden dresser. She motioned for him to come over to her.  
  
Randy moved without thinking until he was in front of her. He tried to avoid thinking and looking at her. She wrapped her legs around him gracefully and didn't hesitate to press as kiss on him.  
  
As they kissed Randy started to think about things. He didn't want to kiss Shannon in the least bit. He in fact was suppressing a laugh when he thought of how Sara kicked her ass. Then he remembered how gross she looked thanks to Sara right now. As he kissed her all he thought about was not thinking of her.  
  
'Try to forget who she is. Pretend she is Sara.' Randy repeatedly told himself. Then he stopped kissing her abruptly.  
  
She pulled away, looked at him and smiled a half smile. She placed her hands at the collar of Randy's button down shirt and pulled her hands apart until all the buttons off the shirt broke off.  
  
Randy, surprised by this action, said, "Stop! This doesn't feel right!"  
  
"Why?" Shannon said as she began to kiss his neck softly.  
  
Randy rolled his eyes and answered, "The only way I am able to kiss you is to think of Sara. Sure I'm pissed at her but you're a bitch."  
  
Right then the door open and light flooded into the room. Randy didn't even bother to look as a very familiar voice asked, "Is anyone having sex in here?"  
  
Shannon quickly answered, "No."  
  
Randy finally looked over to the new comer to see Sara uncovering her eyes. She stared directly at him and called out in a hurt way, "Randy?"  
  
A very pleased smiled spread across Shannon's face as she gently kissed Randy on the cheek. She shoved Randy away from her, looked over to Sara and said obnoxiously, "I guess payback is a bitch."  
  
Randy just stood there, staring at Sara and waiting for her to snap and beat the shit out of Shannon. But she didn't. She just stared into Randy's eyes for what seemed like hours. She finally looked over to Shannon while the slut hopped down from the dresser. She winked at Randy before leaving the room, walking against the wall to prevent from Sara kicking her ass again. She left the room with great haste.  
  
Randy nervously said, "Listen, Sara...-"  
  
"Fuck it! Fuck you! I hope you die! Randy, I fucking hate you!" Sara yelled before running out.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Author's Note:  
  
What do you think? I know it has been a while but I love you. Randy made a huge ass mistake, didn't he? Well that's my boy! Killing starts next chapter, I reckon. I'm not making any promises but lets hope we have some blood and gore goodness...  
  
Love you much....  
  
Sara 


	17. Murder Is As Murder Does

The three of them stood waiting outside the bedroom Sara had entered. Stu leaned against the wall with Jenna standing in front of him with his arms wrapped around her. Kayleigh stood a little away from the couple and kept glancing from the door to them.  
  
After a loud sigh escaped Kayleigh's mouth she said, "It's taking her a while."  
  
"Perhaps she found Randy and they're making up," Jenna shrugged.  
  
"That or she's easily aroused," Stu suppressed a large grin as Jenna elbowed him.  
  
"Let's go save her," Kayleigh suggested and then the bedroom door opened slowly.  
  
"Hey Sara, was Randy in-" Jenna began then quickly shut up when she saw who now exited the room.  
  
Shannon now stood in front of them with this very cocky smile plastered on her face. She looked around at each of them until her eyes settled on Stu. She said with a laugh hidden in her voice, "Hey Stu, if your anything like Randy then maybe you and I could 'talk' some time."  
  
Stu, not really getting what she was implying about Randy replied, "Me and Randy are nothing alike. First off, I am ruggishly good looking, unlike my partner. Secondly, I do not stalk Jamie Lee Curtis. Thirdly, I do not find Sara attractive."  
  
Kayleigh shrugged and said, "Well if Shannon was in there then at least we know Randy isn't in there."  
  
"Don't be so sure," Shannon said mysteriously.  
  
Jenna's eyes widen and she asked promptly, "What do you mean by that?"  
  
Shannon smiled innocently and answered, "Me and Randy just had a little chat, that's all."  
  
Stu's eyes quickly filled with awareness and he slowly said, "That dick! He was the one talking about virgins never dying."  
  
Kayleigh laughed then stopped quickly, gasped lightly and asked, "You mean Randy and Stevo are basically the same?"  
  
Shannon smiled a satisfied smile and said "That's right" before walking away quickly when noticing the malicious look in Jenna's eyes. That left the three of them sending one another suddenly aware looks. Stu looked extremely pissed off and Kayleigh and Jenna both looked uncertain of what to feel. Then this was broken when Sara ran out of the room with a very angry look in her eyes.  
  
She paused, glanced at everyone and ran down the hall and down the stairs with out saying anything. Kayleigh didn't hesitate to say 'goodbye' to Stu and run after her friend. Jenna walked out of Stu's arms and turned to face him and said, "That's my cue to leave, Stu."  
  
He nodded and said, "I'll see you tomorrow then?"  
  
"Yeah. Now, have fun but don't do anything I would do," Jenna leaned up and pecked Stu on the cheek.  
  
"Don't you mean 'Don't do anything I wouldn't do'?" He asked.  
  
"I said what I said," She grinned and started walking off after her cohorts.  
  
He took a minute to stare after her then quickly remembered his accomplice who he suddenly had the urge to kill. He quickly entered the room to see Randy sitting on the edge of the bed with his shirt unbuttoned. Stu glared at him and said, "Now I got to kill you, you know? I can't believe you fucked her!"  
  
Randy looked surprised at his friend's statement and said in a soft small voice, "I didn't fuck her! Whatever, man. Let's just kill people, okay?"  
  
Stu watched him carefully and said, "Sure, lets get to killing."  
  
"Let's," Randy said with a nod.  
  


* * *

  
They stood facing each other, both wearing black robes over their clothes. Both had a ghostface mask in hand and a crazed look in their eyes. They looked at one another and nodded before putting on the masks. Stu grabbed one of the knives he had set one the bed and said, "Knowing you you'll want to add some bullshit comment before killing them so remember to use the voice changer."  
  
Randy sighed and shook the little white voice changer irritably while saying, "I know..."  
  
"Remember if you end up in a crowd to bop around like you too are partying," Stu reminded.  
  
Randy picked up the knife off the bed as Stu had and said, "I know, alright! I know!"  
  
"I'm sorry. This is your first murder after all. Be careful and don't fuck up!" Stu replied.  
  
"Worry about yourself," Randy pointed the knife dangerously at Stu...  
  
Stu laughed and said, "Aren't you being a tad bit too knife happy, pal? I say you just go and gut the shit out of people and get rid of this suppressed rage."  
  
Randy sighed, clapped his hands together and said, "Good luck."  
  
"I don't need any luck. It's pure skill!" That was all Stu said before leaving Randy alone.  
  
Stu walked out of the room and hid the knife in his left sleeve. The hall was empty and Stu knew exactly who he wanted to kill first. He thought just how he would as he moved toward the room he had looked in earlier. His first victim would be the asshole who called him a dick just because. Stu stood outside the bedroom door and opened it quietly and slowly. He slipped in the room and shut the door as quickly as he could. His lovely eyes instantly adjusted to the darkness and what he saw didn't please him really.  
  
A guy, presumably the asshole, and a girl lay entangled in sheets on the bed. The girl had long straight whitish blonde hair and the guy had buzzed brown hair finished a kiss and rested. They were yet to notice Stu who thanked god that the sheets covered all but there faces. Stu hesitated and thought of how he was going to do this. An indecisive grin spread across his masked face as he moved slowly against the white walls.  
  
'How the hell do they not notice a guy in black sneaking against white walls?' Stu wondered.  
  
"So, baby doll, you want to go again?" The guy asked with a hint of eagerness in his voice. His voice sounded just like the asshole's, which made Stu glad to have the right victim.  
  
"Is that all you ever think about?" The girl asked annoyed.  
  
"Yes," The guy answered sheepishly.  
  
"Justin, you are an asshole," The girl snapped and pulled the sheet away from the guy, Justin. She wrapped the sheet all around her and stood up.  
  
Stu reached in his left sleeve and pulled out the knife as he stared at the unsuspecting blonde in front of him. As though to give justice to what he was about to do he told himself: She is a blonde after all and apparently not a virgin. Now she has to die. Rules are rules!  
  
Justin stood up wearing only a pair of smiley face boxers. He smiled at the girl and said, "Baby doll, don't be mad."  
  
Stu raised the knife slowly as he crept up behind her. He was unseen until Justin's eyes widen with terror. He stuttered out in fear, "Hilary... Behind you!"  
  
The girl, Hilary just rolled her eyes and said, "That's not even funny, asshole!"  
  
Stu smiled and tapped the girl on the shoulder. He could feel her go tense. His smile grew as she stiffly turned around. She stared into the ghost face with not total fear for the total fear didn't come until she saw the raised knife.  
  
Stu decided that was the ideal moment: The moment she realized she was going to die. He plunged the knife an inch or so underneath the breastbone and dragged it lower. As soon as he reached the lower region of her stomach he pulled the knife out and started at the breastbone again. He repeated this action three more times, her whimpering in pain every time before he let her and the bloody torn sheet fall to the ground.  
  
He was done with her completely and now he had to worry about Justin. Stu quickly looked up to see Justin running towards the door. He ran and extended his hand for the doorknob. He shook violently as he touched the knob but it was too late.  
  
A knife traveled swiftly across Justin's throat. Blood poured out as he collapsed to the ground. Stu let out a satisfied sigh and leaned against the door. Stu laughed and said, "Good thing this is a new movie or I wouldn't be able to chase you down."  
  
Stu kept kicking Justin's dead body until it was out of the way. He put his hand on the doorknob and thought about how Randy was doing.  
  


* * *

  
Randy stood there for a minute, breathing in and out and trying to mellow himself out. He knew who he wanted to kill but first he wanted to knock off a few people who obviously didn't catch the primary reason Jason killed his victims. He nodded out of determination and placed his knife in his right sleeve and the voice changer he held in his gloved hand.  
  
He placed the voice changer in front of his mouth and said just for the sake of hearing his voice changed, "What's your favorite scary movie?"  
  
He laughed tensely and put the voice changer in his left sleeve and started walking towards the closed bedroom door. Before he reached it it opened and a female voice was heard, "So, what do you want to do?"  
  
Randy quickly ducked out of the way of sight and hid in the corner of the room, between two dressers. He couldn't see the two people that clearly as they pushed into the room, closing the door behind them. The only thing he could tell was that the two were a boy and a girl.  
  
'This will be too easy,' Randy thought as he sat and waited for the perfect moment.  
  
The two sat on the bed and Randy suppressed the urge to yell 'Virgins never die!' The girl asked the boy, "What do you want to do now that we are alone?"  
  
The guy answered, "How about we talk and get to know each other?"  
  
The girl laughed and said, "You are such a virgin, Gerrit. Come on!"  
  
Randy grinned because he was going to kill Gerrit anyway. Then he frowned at hearing Gerrit was a virgin. He thought to himself, 'Damn it. I hope that they have sex otherwise I would go against the rules.'  
  
Gerrit shrugged and said, "I'm willing to do whatever you want to do."  
  
The girl clapped her hands together and said, "Yay! Let's have some fun."  
  
Randy started planning and decided he would kill the girl first because girls scream louder. Then he would torment Gerrit a little then kill him. His plotting paused as he listened to Gerrit say, "Whatever you want."  
  
Randy squinted to see the two roll back onto the bed and kiss. In a short time she was on top of him and Randy was growing impatient. He thought 'Screw this' as he slowly crept toward them. He wasn't going to wait for something he knew would happen...  
  
Gerrit had his eyes closed as he enjoyed the blissful feel of her kiss. His eyes shot open when the kiss stopped and a strangled gasp escaped her mouth. His eyes opened just in time to see a black-gloved hand and a knife quickly swipe across her throat. Blood dripped out, onto him as the body was tossed away from him. Before him stood someone dressed all in black wearing a ghostface mask.  
  
Randy quickly pulled the voice changer to his mouth and said, "If you scream I will kill you just like your little girly friend."  
  
Gerrit, whose mouth had been set to scream, quickly shut it and nodded in a fearful way. Randy still said in the raspy changed voice, "We are going to play a game, Gerrit."  
  
Gerrit said nothing so Randy continued, "You answer a question right you live. You answer one wrong then, well-" Randy pointed the knife dangerously at him.  
  
Gerrit took in a deep breath and said shakily, "What kind of questions are these?"  
  
"These are fun family questions about the bible.... WHAT DO YOU THINK? First I want you to sing Freddy's nursery rhyme."  
  
Gerrit glanced all over the room as though something would hold the answer. He remembered a few lines from that movie but that is all. He shrugged and sang uncertainly, "One, two- Freddy's coming for you...? Three, four- better lock your door... Five, Six-.... Oh crap, that's all I know."  
  
Randy cut in and said feverishly, "Five, Six- grab your crucifix. Seven, eight- Stay up late. Five, ten- never sleep again! Don't you know anything?"  
  
Gerrit covered his face with his hands and asked, "Are you going to kill me now?"  
  
Randy rolled his eyes and replied, "No! Was that a question? I think not. But if you get this question wrong I will kill you. And your question is: Who killed Jamie Lee Curtis in the Halloween films? And you better get this right!"  
  
Gerrit actually knew the answer and spat it out, "Mike Myers! It was Mike Myers!!"  
  
Randy shook his head slowly and said, "I'm sorry, but you are wrong. I gotta kill you now."  
  
"No! I just saw that movie! It was Mike Myers!" Gerrit yelled.  
  
"I'm sorry but the red haired comedian did not kill her. He would be too busy making friends with Conan O'Brien or dressing up as a cat in children films. Michael Myers killed her," Randy now had a menacing grin plastered on his masked face.  
  
Gerrit shook his head violently, "No! You know who I meant! Its not fair!"  
  
"Who said my movie was fair? Besides you and your girl let little Jason drown so you have to die like Kevin Bacon did. Since I don't have an arrow to spear through you your in luck I'm deciding to let you go."  
  
Gerrit's eyes lit up and he said, "Thank you. I wont tell the cops anything either."  
  
Gerrit slowly began to stand up with relief when Randy dropped the voice changer and said in his regular voice, "Oh wait. I promised Kayleigh I would kick your ass. And no ass kicking tops murder, does it?"  
  
Gerrit suddenly froze with terror and asked, "Who are you?"  
  
"A ghost faced murderer," Randy answered before lunging at Gerrit with the knife gripped in his hand.  
  
Gerrit reacted just in time to duck out of harms way. He stood a few feet away from the door and said, "I've heard your voice and I'm going to tell the cops."  
  
That's when the door opened and Gerrit had to blink to see through the foreign light. His eyes widened when he saw who stood before him. But he was too slow to react as a trigger was pulled and a bullet entered his head. He was dead before he hit the ground.  
  
The person who came quickly shut the door to reveal costumed Stu holding a gun in hand. He glared at Randy even though this couldn't be seen and said, "You are so lucky, dumbass!"  
  
"Why did you use the gun? Someone is bound to have heard that. Now lets go," Randy said, slightly panicked as he picked up the voice changer he had dropped.  
  
"Your right. I'll yell the shit out of you later," Stu agreed.  
  
They didn't say anything else as they fled from the scene still wearing their costumes.  
  


* * *

  
Author's note:  
  
Did you hate this? Did it suck? I think I rushed Stu's murders. Do you? Beyond that- how was it? Man, I'm sorry if I wasn't that original with the killing. Slitting throats and gutting is so traditional though so... Well, if you like how it is I will have more killings. I'll probably have more killings whether or not you like it...  
  
Um... I love you all! LOVE AND PEACE... Haha... I just found the irony in me saying 'love and peace' after writing murder and more murder... How about me saying: LOVE AND PIECES  
  


* * *

  
Love to all- Sara 


	18. Announcements, Invincibility & The Phase

Randy and Stu entered Stu's room still wearing their costumes. As soon as the door was securely shut and locked both of them removed their masks. Stu glared at him and said, "You almost fucked everything up, ya know!"  
  
"I know," Randy said with a defeated look on his face.  
  
"Why did you let him hear your actual voice?" Stu asked, angrily.  
  
Randy shrugged and answered, "I guess I was a little too confident."  
  
"Fuck yeah, you were! Next time don't do that because I wont always be there!" Stu dropped the knife he had pulled out of his sleeve on Stevo's old bed.  
  
"Why were you there? What? You didn't think I could handle it or something?" Randy asked, defensively as he too pulled his hidden knife out and dropped it on the bed.  
  
"I was just passing by and heard yelling so I listened in and it looks like I saved our asses," Stu answered.  
  
"Oh," Randy said, defeated then said enthusiastically, "Next time I wont need your help!"  
  
"Next time, Movie Master, you better not! What was with you tonight anyway?" Stu asked calmly.  
  
Randy started unbuttoning the black robes until they fell to the ground, revealing the clothes he wore earlier, including his unbuttoned shirt. He glanced down at this and said, "That damn Shannon broke my buttons...."  
  
Stu walked over and sat on his own bed and said sarcastically, "Oh, I guess a broken buttoned shirt gives justice to the fact that we could have been caught."  
  
Randy pulled off the black gloves and replied with a distant tone, "Sara was really mad, wasn't she?"  
  
Stu ripped off his gloves violently and lied, "No. She thought it was pretty funny actually. She was glad as hell that she wasn't bound to you any longer."  
  
Randy started staring at Stu as though to see if he was serious. He looked pretty serious even though he wasn't and Randy dropped his head slightly with a little, "Oh..."  
  
Stu suppressed a smile and thought to himself, 'Great! Don't have to worry about Sara anymore...'  
  
Randy's head shot up and he said in fake enthusiasm, "Give me all the weapons and the costume."  
  
Stu narrowed his eyes and asked suspiciously, "Why?"  
  
"The cops probably will come back thanks to Stevo. So give me the evidence," Randy answered.  
  
Stu nodded and stood up from his bed. He turned around and said in a girly voice, "Randy, care to unbutton me?"  
  
Stu laughed, shook his head and began to unbutton the black robes. He caught them as they fell off his body and tossed them towards Randy. Randy, slow to react, just barely caught them. He bent down and picked his own off the ground and said, "Don't forget the gun."  
  
Stu rolled his eyes and put his hand on the gun that was tucked half way into his pants with his red shirt covering the rest. He grabbed it by the handle and pulled it out. Randy extended his hand to receive the gun.  
  
Stu pointed the gun at Randy and said, "How am I supposed to know you're still are a virgin? I think I should shoot you and if you still live your a virgin."  
  
Randy eyed Stu and the gun then shook his head and said, "Give me the damn gun."  
  
Stu laughed and handed him the gun. Randy wrapped the gun up in one of the robes. He picked the still bloody knives up and did the same. He yawned and said, "I'll see you tomorrow. I'm tired."  
  
"Yeah, killing people take a shit load of energy out of you. G' Night," Stu said as he plopped himself down on his bed.  
  
Randy walked over to the door, opened it half way and asked, "Should I go talk to Sara?"  
  
"Definitely not," Stu answered and Randy left.  
  
"Tonight was good," Stu muttered as he lay down on his bed.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
No one had heard about the proceeding night's murders and this made Stu nervous a little. Randy just smiled and said, "Be patient!"  
  
The two were heading to film when Jenna joined them. She smiled at Stu then glanced awkwardly at Randy. Sara wasn't there. Randy instinctively asked, "Where is Sara?"  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes, threw up her hands dramatically in the air and said exasperatedly, "Now you care about her?!"  
  
Randy opened his mouth to say something but quickly shut it and began staring at the floor he treaded on as though it was fascinating. Jenna rolled her eyes again and asked Stu, "So, Stuart, what happened at that party after I left?"  
  
Stu shrugged and lied, "I don't know. I left shortly after. So did Randy."  
  
"Oh," She smiled and asked, "So I didn't miss anything?"  
  
"Nothing. The party was really dead," Stu answered, chuckling at his own little joke.  
  
Randy elbowed Stu and asked again to prevent the joke from sinking in, "Where is Sara?"  
  
Stu muttered an 'owww' and Jenna stared at the both of them as though they were psychos. Nonetheless, she finally answered, "She is in the room going through a phase. I love her little phases, too. All she does is sit there in the dark with a blanket wrapped around her and watch horror movies as well as anything with Matthew Lillard in it."  
  
"Why?" Stu and Randy asked in unison.  
  
Jenna answered with a sigh, "Think about it. Her heart has been broken like twice in the past few weeks and for the exact same reason. God! Randy, what were you thinking?"  
  
Randy shrugged, "Ummm... Hey- looky! We are almost at class. What an enjoyable walk we've had. I better get a good seat."  
  
With that, Randy dashed into the classroom in order to avoid the question because he honestly had no idea how to answer. He was very surprised at what he saw when he entered. A cop stood there talking to the teacher, Mr. Connors.  
  
"You mean, they were murdered? All five of them? By the same person?" Mr. Connors asked rather loudly.  
  
The cop glanced around the basically empty classroom and then noticed Randy. He looked back to Mr. Connors and said, "I trust you to notify your students."  
  
The cop turned away from the teacher and headed for the entrance that Randy now stood in. As he passed Randy on his way out they made eye contact. Once he was gone Stu and Jenna joined him at the entrance. Stu slapped Randy in the back of the head and said, "Sit down, why don't ya?"  
  
The three of them sat down in the back row of class, Stu sitting in the middle. Jenna sighed and commented, "Cops suck."  
  
Stu nodded in agreement and said, "I'll give anyone of you a nickel if you ask a cop for bacon and chase after them with a machete!"  
  
Randy, who wasn't even listening leaned forward in his seat, looked at Jenna and asked, "So how long will Sara be in this phase?"  
  
Stu stared at Randy with laughing eyes and smacked him in the chest while saying, "Randy, you are one indecisive crazy bastard, ya know that?"  
  
Jenna suppressed a laugh and suddenly stared at her black painted fingernails with interest. Randy glared at Stu then asked again, "When will her phase be over?"  
  
Jenna looked away from her nails and asked, "Are you asking when her phase will be over or when you'll be able to see her?"  
  
"I guess I am wondering when I can see her," Randy muttered as more people came into the room.  
  
"How about when all hell freezes over? Then you can come on over," Jenna added an odd innocent smile.  
  
More people filed in as Stu pointed out the obvious with saying, "That means she never wants to see ya, Randy ol' pal!"  
  
"I don't care! Who said I cared? I've forgotten about Sara! I mean, Sara who?" Randy crossed his arms over his chest and pouted slightly.  
  
"That's not what I've gathered, Randy," Jenna said.  
  
"I said, Sara who?!" Randy looked mad.  
  
Soon all the chairs around them were filled with students and Mr. Connors looked like he was about to throw up. And eventually he said very weakly, "Excuse me class."  
  
The class ignored him but gradually when they noticed his serious face they all went quiet. Then the teacher said in the same weak voice, "Its my solemn responsibility to inform you that five students were murdered last night."  
  
He paused to let this sink in and it did. Soon people turned to one another and whispered amongst themselves. Stu and Randy looked at each other and nodded in acknowledgement. Then Randy whispered so only Stu could hear, "Five? I only got one."  
  
Stu whispered back with pride in his voice, "I told you, Movie Master, it's all about skill. Got that, rookie?"  
  
Jenna eyed them both suspiciously then turned to the front of the room and asked loud enough to be heard over the class, "Who was murdered?"  
  
With her question the class went silent as they waited for the teachers response. Mr. Connors answered dramatically, "The five students were Hilary Duff...." (A/n: Told ya I would kill Hilary Duff, Jenna... Hahaha. She never thought she'd be killed by Stu, did she? Nope.)  
  
"She deserved it, I'm sure," Jenna whispered to the two boys beside her.  
  
Stu nodded in a 'you know that's right' way as the teacher continued "...Justin Tennent..." (A/n: Only Kayleigh will get that...)  
  
"He deserved it too, right?" Randy muttered.  
  
"Right," Jenna agreed.  
  
Mr. Connors continued still "...Nicki Stellar...."  
  
"She deserved it," Stu commented. (A/n: I swear if Stu hadn't beat me to it I would have killed that bitch! Grrrr... Sorry, she is this really annoying girl at my school...)  
  
"....Gerrit Nycamp...."  
  
Jenna gasped slightly and muttered to herself, "Oh my god..."  
  
"....and Sara Schmidt," The teacher finished. (A/n: For those who don't know, that's me! So I killed myself... Not Sara Black but my real self. LOL! Good times man, good times.)  
  
This too was left to sink in. Stu just laughed on the inside and thought, 'I killed Sara in some sense.'  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Class was over and the three walked together in silence. Stu put his arms around Jenna as they walked and said, "Are you okay, beautiful?"  
  
Jenna forced a smile and said, "I'm great. I just am wondering how Kayleigh will take this."  
  
Randy stuffed his hands in his pockets and walked in silence. Thats when Kayleigh joined them, walked beside Jenna and said 'hi' to everyone but Randy. Everyone noticed and Stu soon asked, "Hey, aren't you going to say hello to Randy?"  
  
"Who?" She asked, not looking at Randy.  
  
"Isn't that mature," Jenna commented with a laugh then went silent when she remembered Gerrit.  
  
Kayleigh walked, still avoiding looking at Randy and asked again, "Who?"  
  
Randy put his hands on his forehead and rubbed there as though he had a headache. He then said, "I'm sorry Kayleigh. Please don't be mad at me."  
  
She finally looked at him and spat, "Apologize to Sara!"  
  
Realizing she was talking to him she looked away quickly and Randy whined, "But Jenna said I can't see Sara until hell freezes over!"  
  
Jenna laughed and said, "Well, you could see her but I wouldn't recommend it."  
  
Stu, who looked at no one and sported a very serious look on his face said, "So, Kayleigh.... Five students were murdered last night...."  
  
Her eyes widened only slightly and she asked, "Did they deserve it?"  
  
Jenna raised a hand to high five Kayleigh and said, "Hell yeah, they did!"  
  
Kayleigh high fived her and laugh while saying, "Who was killed?"  
  
Stu pinched Jenna slightly causing her to say 'Owww!' and glare at him. Her face softened and she looked at Kayleigh sympathetically while saying gently, "Gerrit was killed...."  
  
Kayleigh stopped walking suddenly and stood there frozen for a minute. She simply said, emotionlessly, "I have to go..."  
  
Kayleigh ran off before anyone could say anything else to her. The three of them stared after her, silently. Then the silence was broken when Randy asked, "Is she going to be going through a phase too now?"  
  
Jenna nodded and answered, "Probably. Everyone is getting their boyfriends killed."  
  
Stu laughed to himself and said, "But don't worry about me being killed, Jenna. I'm invincible."  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and said, "Just learn to follow the rules."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
Okay, whoa... I've been updating like crazy, haven't I? Well, I had too cuz Jenna said she would gut me like a fish If I hadn't. Speaking of my clone, she is the reason I've been able to update at all. You see, my Microsoft Word died for some reason so I've been sending the chapters to Jenna and she has been fixing them and putting them on here. So everyone thank Jenna who rocks!  
  
Oh! Guess what? I had the greatest dream an hour ago. See, Matthew Lillard worked at a convenient store and I went there and bought some chips. I saw him and started freaking out but didn't say anything because I was sooo excited. I went back to the store (who wouldn't?) and I told him he was the greatest actor alive and he thanked me and thats all I remember... I think after that we went to church together... Lol... Oh the great irony it was....  
  
Love you all! Sara 


	19. Forget The Rules

Jenna and Stu still walked beside Randy, currently silent. The silence was broken when Jenna said, "Its sad about those poor people. You know, getting murdered and all..."  
  
"I thought they all deserved it," Randy commented, still sporting a frown on his face.  
  
"They do but its still kind of sad," Jenna replied.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah! It's sad and all. Hey Jenna, wanna go make out?" Stu asked slyly.  
  
Jenna looked at him as though he was crazy, shrugged her shoulders and answered with a simple, "Okay."  
  
"Yay!" Stu clapped and took Jenna by the hand. He glanced at Randy and said, "See ya later, pal!"  
  
Stu started dragging Jenna off in the direction of his room with a grin on his face. Randy stood there for a moment, staring after them. He muttered to himself, "Maybe I should go see Sara."  
  
He started heading off in the direction of Sara, Jenna, and Kayleigh's room.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Stu ran with Jenna in hand until they stood outside his room. Stu smiled and turned the doorknob, opened the door slightly then kicked it open. He ran into the room and tossed himself onto Stevo's bed. Jenna stared at the door for a second and asked, "Was kicking the door open really necessary?"  
  
Stu motioned for Jenna to join him and said, "A man has to do what a man has to do."  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and walked in the room, closing the door behind her. She smiled and slowly walked to the edge of Stevo's bed. She looked around and noticed a picture of Sara on the bedside table. "Hmmm...." She muttered as she turned the picture face down....  
  
"Come on!" Stu said as he leaned over, grabbed Jenna by the waste and pulling her onto the bed.  
  
Jenna giggled slightly and laid down in Stu's arms, She looked at him and frowned, "People are dead."  
  
"Yeah, so? We are on the verge of having a heated make out session!" Stu whined.  
  
Jenna smiled and tossed one of her legs across Stu's body and leaned close to him so her lips were only a few inches away from his and said, "Aren't you sensitive..."  
  
"I have my moments," he muttered and softly kissed her. She kissed him back and stroked his cheek slightly. He wrapped his arm around her and caressed her back gently thinking, 'Got to remember the rules!'  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Randy paced outside Sara's door, wondering if he should go in. After ten minutes of this he decided he would go in... He would just go in and apologize...  
  
He didn't knock, he just opened the door before he could debate anymore. He walked into the room to see a small television located on the opposing side of the room. Two blanket wrapped figures sat in front of the television set.  
  
"Jenna! Did you bring more movies?" Sara asked with out looking away from the TV,  
  
"Yeah! We're currently making fun of Halloween Resurrection," Kayleigh didn't look away either.  
  
Randy didn't know what to say but eventually said nervously, "Ummm, Sara..."  
  
Sara's head shot around and she stared at Randy for a moment, hurt in her eyes.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Stu leaned over Jenna, kissing her neck softly. Then Jenna pushed him away from her causing him to ask, "What's wrong?"  
  
She grinned and sat up and crawled on top of Stu. She looked at him innocently and said, "Nothings wrong."  
  
She pulled Stu up so they were face to face and she forcefully kissed him while placing her hands under his t-shirt and on his bare chest. He, not knowing what Jenna's intentions were, pulled away from the kiss for a second and pulled his shirt off over his head and tossed it to the ground. Jenna pushed him to lie down again and examined his shirtless body. Pale scars covered his stomach and she placed her hands on them, tracing them with her fingers.  
  
She looked at Stu's face and asked softly, "Where did you get the scars?"  
  
He didn't even bother to look down as he locked one of her hands into his, pulled it towards his lips and kissed it. Still holding her hand he answered, "You know how High School is..."  
  
She looked at him, confused and said, "I would have loved to attend your school..."  
  
"Wouldn't we all?" Stu asked sarcastically, getting a distant look in his eyes.  
  
They just sat there, in silence as Stu thought of the past. That's when he felt a little pain and he looked down. Jenna had her teeth sunk into his chest.  
  
"Are you biting me?" He asked.  
  
Jenna stopped biting him and said, "Well, you were ignoring me, Stuart."  
  
"I'm sorry... Allow me to make that up to you," Stu said.  
  
Jenna grinned and thought, 'Got to follow the rules or I get killed with a machete.'  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"Randy, what do you want?" Sara asked as she stood up from her place on the floor. Kayleigh sat there staring at Randy and paused the movie that played on the television screen.  
  
Randy stared at Sara and said, "I came to apologize."  
  
Randy looked at Kayleigh who gave him two thumbs up. Sara wobbled towards him and dropped the blanket that was draped around her. She wore a black t- shirt, black flannel bottoms and -oddly enough- Scooby Doo slippers. Sara stumbled toward him a little more and said, "Apology not excepted!"  
  
Randy glanced from her to Kayleigh who said, "Don't listen to her. She's drunk. Of course she accepts your apology. Now you two kiss and make up!"  
  
Sara frowned and took a few unsteady steps towards him until she stood a few feet before him. She glared and said calmly, "Maybe you should go kiss and make up with Shannon."  
  
Randy looked down at the floor and muttered, "Forgive me please!"  
  
"Of course I'll forgive you Randy," Sara said softly causing Randy to look back up. Then she added, "When hell freezes over!"  
  
Then she pulled her hand back and slapped him across the face, yelling, "I hate you!!"  
  
She stumbled slightly and fell forward. Randy caught her before she could hit the ground and commented, "I'm sorry Sara."  
  
Sara pushed away from him and ran out the still open door, yelling on her way out, "No! Leave me alone!"  
  
Kayleigh smiled at him and said, "That's just how she says 'I love you'."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Stu rolled them both over so he was on top of Jenna. He kissed her passionately as she wrapped her legs around him. Her hands traced his cool bare spine absent-mindedly.  
  
The rules, Jenna reminded herself. As they kissed she realized she was bound to get sliced in half with a machete any minute now. "Stu," She said, interrupting the kiss.  
  
He opened his eyes and asked, "Yeah? What's wrong?"  
  
She unwrapped her legs and pushed Stu over to the side and stood up off of the bed. She looked at him and said just to bring justice to preventing what (more like who) she wanted to do, "People were murdered!"  
  
Stu crawled off the bed and stood beside her. He frowned slightly then quickly grinned as he said, "I bet the were killed with a really big knife. Hey- speaking of big things.... Jenna, do you want to see my big knife?"  
  
Jenna laughed and glanced down at his 'knife' and looked at him with regret. Stu bit his lower lip and said, "Yeah... Death would suck, wouldn't it?"  
  
"Well I guess I should go," Jenna said as she leaned in and kissed Stu on the cheek.  
  
"Bye," Stu said, pecking her on the lips.  
  
They both paused and stared at one another longingly. Then, at the same time they both said, "Fuck the rules!"  
  
They looked at one another for a moment then Jenna jumped onto him. Stu, being caught off guard, fell backward on the bed with Jenna on top of him. He put his hands on the neckline of her shirt and commented, "What's with all these buttons?"  
  
She laughed as he started unbuttoning the top one, saying, "Damn, it's a tricky little bastard."  
  
"You know what? This might work better," Jenna said, pushing his hands away. She put her own hands in the center of the shirt, midway through the buttons and ripped her hands and the shirt apart. Buttons flew off the shirt and one hit Stu in the face causing him to say, "Ouchy! That sure did smart."  
  
He looked at the new scenery and said with a smile, "Oh happy day!"  
  
She pushed the opened shirt off her shoulders and it just fell down her arms and landed on the floor. Stu extended a finger and traced the lines of her ribs then put a hand on her shoulder, tracing a single black bra strap while asking, "Where are your scars?"  
  
She smiled and asked back, "Were you lying about having a big knife?"  
  
"I'll show you," Stu said putting his hands on his belt. He started unbuckling it when a knock came at the door.  
  
"Damn it!" Jenna snapped her fingers and Stu stopped what he was doing.  
  
Before they could react the door swung open and in walked Sara. She closed the door behind her and stared at them. She simply said, "Strange...."  
  
Jenna got off of Stu and looked around for some coverage. She picked up Stu's white t-shirt and pulled it over her head. It was rather large on her length wise but it worked its purpose. Stu sat up and asked, "Sara, what the hell are you doing here?"  
  
She glanced at both of them and said, "I'm apparently stopping some love makin'! You should thank me!"  
  
She wobbled over to the bed and sat next to Stu saying, "Stu, shame on you!" She pinched him on the arm.  
  
"Jenna! Shame on you!" She reached over and pinched Jenna on the arm.  
  
Jenna sat down the other side of Sara and sighed while asking, "Your drunk, aren't you?"  
  
"Yes, I am!" Sara said, starting to laugh at nothing really.  
  
"So, is your phase over?" Stu asked.  
  
"Hell no! Randy just visited me so I paused the phase," Sara said, looking around the room.  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and said, a little annoyed, "I told him to wait for hell to freeze over. God, no one listens."  
  
"Speaking of not listening! You two looked to be rather... Ummm... Together. You sluts!" Sara said, yawning.  
  
Stu stood up and stretched. He glared at Sara and replied coldly, "Have you seen Shannon lately? Oh yeah, I should ask Randy..."  
  
Jenna patted Sara on the back, looked at Stu in a way that told him to shut up and said, "So, did Kayleigh tell you?"  
  
Sara yawned again and glared fiercely at Stu while asking, "What happened?"  
  
"People got killed," Stu said, adding, "Oh yeah! And some drunk little girl interrupted me and Jenna!"  
  
Sara continued to glare and said calmly, "That's pretty cool... Hey, I'm tired!"  
  
She stood up and glanced at the bedside table, seeing the faced down picture frame. She reached over and lifted the picture and put it on its stand so she herself was being seen. With that she walked over to Stu's empty bed and laid down on it. She turned her back to them and said, "You kids have fun on Stevo's bed! And remember, I'm watching you!"  
  
"That's my bed!" Stu whined and turned to look at Jenna.  
  
She motioned for Stu to join her and he did. He sat next to her and kissed her on the forehead. She smiled and whispered, "Remember, she is watching us."  
  
Stu pouted and said, "Some other time then..."  
  
"I'm always watching so beware!" Sara said abruptly.  
  
"Damn it," Jenna and Stu said in unison.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
Hahaha! Jenna wanted some action and since she is helping me out I gave her this chapter. I hope you liked that even though it sucks... It wasn't the greatest thing I've written but I love you all!  
  
I'll try and update soon... Seeing as I have no life I will!  
  
Much love to all- SARA 


	20. Jones and Silent George Strike Back

The three of them slept peacefully in the late hours of the morning. Sara slept crunched up in a ball on Stu's bed with the pillow placed over her head. Over on the late, great, blue haired Stevo's bed Jenna and Stu laid peacefully together. Shirtless hot Stu lay on his back with an arm underneath Jenna's head, supporting her like a pillow would. One of her arms draped itself over Stu's bare chest limply.  
  
None of them would have awoken for a long while if a knock hadn't sounded. It took twelve loud booming knocks to wake Jenna who yawned and opened her eyes slowly. When she saw Stu she looked startled and forgot about the previous night where they almost broke the sacred rules (BUT DIDN'T!). A smile spread across her face as she shook Stu to wake him up. Her tired voice muttered, "Stu! Get up. Someone is at the door."  
  
He opened his eyes leisurely and whined back, "Then go open the door. I'm tired!"  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and kicked the blanket that only covered her legs. She got off the bed and slowly walked toward the door, glancing at the sleeping Sara as she walked. She opened the door a crack and asked groggily, "Can I help you?"  
  
"Yes! Is a Stuart Killings here?" A voice asked causing Jenna to actually look to see who it was, unlike what she did moments earlier. Before her stood the two men she had seen leave Stu's room the night he and Sara had 'slept' together. Before her stood Detective Jones and Silent George.  
  
"Ummm... Yeah!" She answered hesitantly as she looked over to Stu and said, "Stu! You have company."  
  
"Tell them to go away! I'm tired!" Stu said muffled as he placed a pillow over his head as Sara had.  
  
With that, Sara rolled off of Stu's bed and shrieked, "Ow! That's the second time I've done that..."  
  
Detective Jones pushed the door open more and walked in with Silent George following behind him. He looked from Stu to Sara and said, "Good morning, Miss Black."  
  
Sara jumped a little and stood up from where she had fallen. She looked at the detective, startled and said, "Hey there Detective Jones! Howdy Silent George!" She added a little salute to Silent George who saluted back.  
  
Jenna closed the door and mouthed 'Silent George' questioningly to Sara who smiled a goofy smile and said, "Jenna! This is Detective Jones and Silent George. They are detectives!"  
  
Jenna glanced at them nervously and muttered, "I've gathered that."  
  
She walked over to where Stu laid and shook him violently. She continued this until he threw the pillow off of his head, sat up and shrieked angrily, "WHAT?!"  
  
"Mr. Killings, may we have a word with you?" Detective Jones asked sternly as he continued to glance from Sara to Jenna, thinking 'This boy sure gets around.'  
  
Stu looked at the detective and muttered a little, "Oh..."  
  
Sara laughed and said, "Stuart! Commerce with your guests!"  
  
Stu leaped off of the bed and asked, "What is the problem?"  
  
"As you were informed, five students were murdered two nights ago at a party," Detective Jones said in an emotionless voice.  
  
"At the party?" Jenna asked.  
  
Silent George nodded and ran an extended finger across his throat and did the snoopy dance. Jenna nodded in acknowledgement and allowed Jones to continue.  
  
"Sounds like one bitchin' party!" Sara said, still sporting the goofy smile. Silent George looked at her sternly and she said, "I mean... Those poor people."  
  
Jones looked at Sara dismissively, stared back at Stu and asked, "Were you at that party?"  
  
"Yeah," Stu answered knowing he couldn't lie while Jenna and Sara were there.  
  
Jones nodded in a way that told you that that's all he wanted to hear. He smiled smugly and said, "I'm sorry, Mr. Killings but we are going to have to take you in and question you down at the station. You are the prime suspect in these, as well as your former roommate's murder."  
  
"Why? Because I went to a party?" Stu asked, his eyes widened in fear.  
  
"Wait! Stu, you are such a liar!" Jenna said, fake glaring at Stu.  
  
Everyone looked at her and Stu asked, "What am I lying about?"  
  
"You never were at that party!" Jenna said, pinching him slightly so he would get the hint to go along with it.  
  
Stu got the hint and managed to not look surprised. He opened his mouth to say something when Sara cut in and lied, "Jenna's right! I was at that party all night and I never saw you."  
  
Jones and Silent George looked at them all suspiciously. Then Jenna asked Stu, "Are you mixing up that party from like two weeks ago with this one?"  
  
Stu faked a look of contemplation and said, "Your right! I am, aren't I?"  
  
Detective Jones had this sudden look of disappointment as Stu asked with a hint of cockiness, "Is there anything else you need?"  
  
"No, there isn't," Jones said in a defeated tone. Then he added, his voice filled with paranoia, "I will be back before you know it. I think you have something to do with this!"  
  
"Bye then," Jenna said with an innocent smile.  
  
"See ya, Silent George!" Sara said, saluting him again.  
  
He saluted back and started walking towards the door. Detective Jones glared at Stu suspiciously and said, "I'll be back."  
  
"We got that part. Bye bye," Jenna waved.  
  
He didn't say anything as he turned, opened the door and walked out. Silent George shrugged and followed, closing the door behind him. Stu glanced from Sara to Jenna and asked, "Why did you do that?"  
  
"Because, I already told you, I hate cops," Jenna answered.  
  
"I was just following Jenna's lead," Sara said as she fell backwards on Stu's bed.  
  
"Plus, it would be a shame if you went to prison for a murder you didn't do," Jenna said, poking one of his lovely dimples.  
  
"Actually, I would find it funny if he made close 'friends' with a guy named Daisy," Sara said, laughing.  
  
Stu glared at Sara slightly and muttered, "Well, thank you to all."  
  
Jenna started laughing slightly. Then when Stu asked 'What?' she said, "We 'slept' together, Stu!"  
  
Stu nodded and muttered, "Right..."  
  
"Hey, Loser! Do you have any aspirin? I have a fucking headache," Sara complained.  
  
"Yeah. It's in the top dresser drawer over there. Try and take the whole bottle and die, please," Stu replied coolly.  
  
"Anything to make you happy, asshole," Sara smiled sweetly as she got up off the bed again.  
  
Jenna frowned and stated sarcastically, "I'm becoming so overwhelmed by all the love in this room."  
  
"Love? I'll show you love," Stu grinned as he leaned over and planted a kiss on Jenna's unsuspecting lips.  
  
Sara rolled her eyes and commented, "Stu, your a fucking dog that humps peoples legs. Just like that damn Tim." (A/n- Read Jenna's Witches of Eastwick Fic and you'll understand.)  
  
She glanced over at them to see the two groping one another. She just walked over to the dresser and opened the top dresser. She dug around for the aspirin, which she eventually found, along with a small white book, which she grabbed. She glanced at the book then at Stu and Jenna in disgust. She took the book and sat down and flipped it to a middle page.  
  
Pictures covered the pages with names underneath them making Sara realize it was a yearbook. One picture caught her eye and she muttered, "Randy Meeks...?"  
  
This made Stu stop what he was doing with Jenna and looked over to Sara who held his senior yearbook. He leaped up causing Jenna to be startled. He quickly moved toward Sara and grabbed the yearbook, closing it. He snapped, "Don't look through my shit!"  
  
Both Sara and Jenna jumped slightly and Sara asked, "Why does it say Randy's name is 'Randy Meeks'?"  
  
"Its a typo," Stu answered instantly as he tossed the book back into the open drawer.  
  
Sara stood up and yelled, "I FUCKING HATE YOU STU!"  
  
"GOOD!" He yelled back. She pouted and stomped towards the door, which she opened. She glared at him and yelled, "I HOPE THEY LOCK YOU AWAY!"  
  
She started stomping away, leaving Jenna to stare after her. She looked at Stu and yelled, "BE NICER!"  
  
He shrugged defensively and asked, "Your mad at me too?"  
  
"YES!" She yelled as she stood up from the bed and stomped towards the door.  
  
"So, I'll see you later?" Stu asked.  
  
"Okay, bye!" She said before she left, closing the door behind her.  
  
"Women are crazy," He muttered to himself.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
God, that was a really short chapter, wasn't it? I'm sorry... I just felt like writing it so I did. God, I'm updating a lot...I probably will update again soon.... Very soon... I hope you like this cuz I think it all sucks....  
  
Well, I have to go and watch Matty bleed and drool on himself... I LOVE STU!  
  
SARA 


	21. Theft

The two girls stormed out of Stu's room, angrily. Once they were a little bit away from Stu Jenna asked, "What was that thing you were looking at that made Stu mad?"  
  
"Yearbook," Sara answered dismissively.  
  
"And what about Randy?" She asked as she realized she was still wearing Stu's t-shirt.  
  
Sara noticed too that what she wore belonged to Stu the whore. She glared at the shirt as though it was it's owner and said, "Let's use the shirt for voodoo or something."  
  
"No!" She hugged the shirt slightly, "I love the shirt!"  
  
"Then why the hell did you storm out of there all pissed off?" Sara asked, still glaring at the shirt.  
  
"Oh! I was just following your lead," Jenna shrugged innocently then asked again, "What about Randy?"  
  
Sara sighed despairingly and answered, "In that yearbook it said Randy's name is Randy Meeks. Stu, the asshole who should be locked away forever, claims it's a typo."  
  
"Perhaps you read wrong," Jenna suggested.  
  
"There is only one way to find out," Sara began.  
  
Jenna grinned and said, "We can steal it!"  
  
"Let's get Kayleigh and rob Stu!" Sara said excitedly.  
  
"Yeah... Kayleigh probably needs a little havoc wreckage," Jenna nodded in agreement.  
  
Sara grinned mischievously and asked "Can I beat him up while were robbing him?"  
  
Jenna smiled and simply answered, "How 'bout no?"  
  
"Damn you to hell!" Sara fake pouted.  
  
~*~*~  
  
They crept into their room slowly. Why they crept, no one knows. Once they were inside they closed the door and noticed Kayleigh, wide-awake, staring across the room. The two girls followed her gaze to see something highly unexpected.  
  
There, lying on Sara's bed was Randy. He was covered in her black blankets and laid facing down, with his face embedded in a red pillow. Jenna whispered to Kayleigh, "Why is he here?"  
  
Kayleigh's eyes laughed slightly as she answered, "He was waiting for Sara to come back."  
  
"Awwww.... Isn't that sweet, Sara?" Jenna teased as her friend glared slightly at Randy.  
  
Sara slowly walked towards Randy's sleeping body, saying nothing. Jenna sat next to Kayleigh and whispered, "This is gonna be good."  
  
"Hell yeah! Do you got any popcorn?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
Sara stood over Randy and gently sat down on the bed. She stared down at him and shook him lightly. Softly she said, "Randy. Wake up..."  
  
He stirred a little until he turned onto his back. His eyes slowly fluttered open and he stared at Sara in silence. She asked softly, "Why are you sleeping in my bed?"  
  
He, figuring Sara had forgiven him, answered, "I wanted to apologize to you."  
  
Jenna whispered to Kayleigh, "Why isn't she bitch slapping him?"  
  
Kayleigh shrugged and said, "Maybe they'll kiss and make up."  
  
"Oh Randy," Sara said with a smile. The smile vanished and she asked angrily, "How is Shannon doing?"  
  
"See! That's what I'm talking about!" Jenna said happily.  
  
"I wouldn't know how Shannon is! She could be dead for all I care!" Randy shrieked as he sat up.  
  
"I hate you!" She snapped.  
  
"I'm sorry!" Randy yelled defensively.  
  
Sara glanced at her friends, sighed and strangely enough turned to Randy and kissed him. He, totally caught off guard, kissed her back at the last second. She pulled away and frowned. He looked at her strangely and asked, "You still hate me?"  
  
Kayleigh whispered, "See? They kissed and made up!"  
  
"Do I still hate you?" Sara repeated. She glared and said, "Hell yeah I still hate you!"  
  
"Why did you kiss me then?" Randy asked, highly confused.  
  
"TO GET IT OUT OF MY SYSTEM!! NOW LEAVE!" Sara screamed.  
  
Jenna laughed, "Yes! That's what I'm talking about! YEAH!"  
  
Everyone looked at Jenna and Kayleigh asked, "Are you drunk?"  
  
"No! How come everyone always thinks I am? I'm just crazy!" Jenna answered.  
  
"Anyway..." Randy started.  
  
"I told you to get out!" Sara pointed toward the door.  
  
"Fine!" Randy pushed the covers off of him and jumped off the bed. He walked to the door and looked at Sara who didn't even look back.  
  
"Ah... Young love," Kayleigh smiled and waved to Randy.  
  
"Bye, Sara!" Randy said as he opened the door.  
  
"Be gone!" Sara still didn't look at him.  
  
With that, he left, not bothering to close the door. Jenna stood up and slammed the door. She turned and looked at her friends and said, "Men today.... They are all so lazy and melodramatic."  
  
"Stu too?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"Forget about that!" Sara stood up and walked toward Kayleigh and Jenna. She nodded toward Jenna and said, "We have to wreak havoc!"  
  
"Oh yeah!" Jenna remembered, "We are going to steal something from lovely Stu."  
  
Kayleigh calmly asked, "What are we stealing?"  
  
"His yearbook," Sara answered with an evil grin on her face.  
  
"Oh! I get it. Jenna is going to have an unhealthy obsession with Stu! First she steals his shirt, now she is going to steal mementos from his youthful days," Kayleigh laughed.  
  
Jenna crossed her arms over her chest and said, "I am not going to have an unhealthy obsession with Stu! I'll have you know, obsessions are very healthy!"  
  
"Then why are we swiping the yearbook?" Kayleigh asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
Jenna shrugged and said, "Curiosity, I suppose."  
  
"Plus it said Randy's last name is 'Meeks'," Sara added.  
  
"Hmmmm... Strange," Kayleigh commented.  
  
Jenna looked toward Sara and asked, "How should we steal it?"  
  
"Why are you asking me?" Sara laughed evilly and suggested, "How about we kill Stu like Michael Myers would and take the book and run!"  
  
Jenna nodded in agreement and said, "Good plan, except... Killing Stu! Honestly... Like you aren't a key suspect already, Miss 'I-dated-Stevo-who- was-murdered-after-he-cheated-on-you'!"  
  
"Wow, good times. I'm so glad we are recapping such good memories," Kayleigh sighed.  
  
Sara glared at Jenna then shrugged and said with a hint of anger, "Fine! We wont kill the bastard. Just take away all my fun, why don't ya!"  
  
"How about Jenna distracts him and we swipe it?" Kayleigh suggested.  
  
"Good plan!" Jenna said instantly.  
  
"I bet you think it's a good plan for you, Miss Almost Broke The Rules!" Sara muttered bitterly, upset that she couldn't kill Stu.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Stu sat there in his room, lying on his bed with his hands underneath his head. He had an unfolded newspaper lying on his bare chest and he sported a huge grin. He muttered to himself, "Randy is such a rookie!"  
  
He chuckled and wondered how he would kill his next victim. As these thoughts ran through his head a knock came at the door and he jumped slightly. Him, being too lazy to get up called out, "Come in!"  
  
The door flew open and in walked Randy. He looked at Stu with annoyance as he closed the door. He frowned and asked, "Is that the paper? Hey, you actually can read!"  
  
"Your just mad because you got shot down!" Stu mocked.  
  
"Whatever!" Randy glared darkly then asked, "Does it talk about the murders?"  
  
"Of course. We are going to blow them all to oblivion when we strike again," Stu grinned.  
  
"Hell yeah we are," Randy agreed.  
  
A knock sounded again and Stu sighed exasperatedly asking, annoyed, "God! Who is it?"  
  
Randy, realizing Stu wasn't going to get up walked over and opened the door to see Jenna standing there. As soon as she saw him her eyes widened and she said very loudly, "Oh looky! It's Randy!"  
  
He didn't notice but she moved her hand in a beckoning way to someone in the hall. Suddenly Sara walked into the picture and looked at Randy with annoyance. Then Jenna leaned in and whispered in her ear so only she could hear, "You have to distract Randy!"  
  
"Damn it," Sara muttered then forced a smile and said, "Randy, can we go to your room or something? We need to talk."  
  
Randy spoke with surprise and eagerness, "Yeah. We can go to my room."  
  
He walked past Jenna, grabbed Sara's hand to her disliking and started dragging her off. Jenna stared after them and when Randy wasn't looking Sara glared at Jenna and, with her free hand, drove an extended finger across her throat like Silent George would do and pointed at Jenna while mouthing 'You'. Jenna laughed and waved to them when she heard Stu whine, "Jenna! Come in!"  
  
She walked in to the room, leaving the door open. She smiled at him and said, "Stu, you gotta come with me! I've got something to show you. Get up."  
  
Stu yawned and asked, "Can't you show me in here?"  
  
"No! Now get your lovely ass up!" Jenna ordered.  
  
He grinned and said, "Fine, fine, fine!"  
  
He stood up and opened his closet and grabbed a black t-shirt. He pulled it over his head and asked, "Where are we going?"  
  
"Just follow me," Jenna said as she walked out of the room. He shook his head and followed, closing the door behind him.  
  
As they walked down the hall the crossed paths with Kayleigh. Stu waved and said, "Howdy Kayleigh!"  
  
"Ummmm...Howdy?" She glanced at them dismissively as she passed them.  
  
She walked to where the door to Stu's room was and waited until he and Jenna were out of site. Once they were she opened the door, slipped in the room, and closed the door quickly. She looked around the room and laughed while reminding herself, "The object is in his top dresser drawer."  
  
She walked over to the said dresser and opened the drawer slowly as though if opened to quickly it would self-destruct. When it was open she saw the white thin book sitting on top of all the other things. She grabbed it and closed the drawer quickly, the opposite of how she opened it.  
  
A mischievous smile spread across her face. She would steal some Stu and Stevo artifacts...  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
I'm sorry if that was boring. I'll show what other things Kayleigh steals in the next chapter. Hahahaha. Sorry, I'm kind of crazy. But who cares? BAH HUMBUG!  
  
I love all my lovely reviewers. Jenna, you rock. Kayleigh, keep on truckin'! Dawnie-7, you really rock because you're the only person who reads this who isn't in the story. I think you rock much I will add a little cameo thing in a future chapter.  
  
I love all three of ya! Oh, another character will be added in the next few chapters. It's going to be freaking awesome who I bring. All I'm saying is 'Serial Mom'. That's all!  
  
Love you all,  
  
SARA the crazy 80's freak 


	22. Distractions

Sara walked into his room kind of pissed off. She stared at Randy for a moment, hate billowing behind the forced smile. Randy's room contained two beds, one presumably being Randy's roommate's. On one side of the  
  
room movies laid everywhere. A television set sat on a bedside table located at the end of the bed.  
  
"So, where is your roommate?" Sara asked, making conversation.  
  
"Most likely off smoking, selling cigarettes to children and pillaging the village woman," Randy shrugged and walked toward his bed after closing the door.  
  
His bed was littered with movies and he simply pushed them off and onto the floor. Sara sighed and walked over to his bed. She sat beside him stiffly. She cracked her knuckles absently and said, "So. You like movies."  
  
"Hell yeah. Life is just one big movie. Except this movie sucks," Randy replied.  
  
"Actually, I think it's just getting good," Sara replied as she picked up a DVD off the ground and looked at it.  
  
He glanced at what she held in her hands and quickly tossed it across the room saying nervously, "That's not mine."  
  
"Don't be ashamed of Scooby-Doo! That movie is awesome! You gotta love the Shaggster!" Sara grinned at his discomfort.  
  
He smiled at her then said, "You are right though. This movie is just getting good. So, what genre would you put our movie in?"  
  
"Well," Sara actually didn't want to kill Randy at this point as she said, "The genre, I would have to say, is horror for the murders, Comedy because Stu is funny looking, Romance just because, Drama for the melodramatic moments we all have, Family because I'm so sure Jenna and Stu almost having sex is good clean 'See-it-with-your-church-youth-group' fun. And, we can't forget this gem, Western as symbolism for the randomness that is."  
  
Randy's eyes widened in surprise as he said, "That's brilliant!"  
  
"Whatever. I try," She shrugged modestly.  
  
"Are you still mad at me?" He asked.  
  
"Fuck yes! I hate you," She said blankly.  
  
The hope in his eyes died and he asked sadly, "Why must you hate me?"  
  
"Because you are scum, much like my dead boyfriend Stevo! You followed exactly in his footsteps," She said adding a sigh of despair.  
  
"Why must you always bring it up?" He asked, annoyed.  
  
"IT ONLY HAPPEND TWO NIGHTS AGO!" She unintentionally yelled.  
  
"But I apologized!" He complained.  
  
"Just give me a second to think up a witty comment!" She said beginning to contemplate.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"Where are we going?" Stu asked.  
  
"My room," Jenna answered.  
  
Stu grinned and said, "I like the sound of that!"  
  
"Don't we all?" Jenna grinned as well.  
  
When they got to the room she opened the door a little and kicked the door the remainder of the way open just as Stu had done a day before. He laughed and walked in behind her, her closing the door behind the two of them. He grinned more and asked, "What did ya wanna show me?"  
  
She led him over to her bed and said innocently, "I just thought I would give you your shirt back."  
  
"Why couldn't ya give it to me in my room?" He asked, not getting what she was implying.  
  
She thought quickly and answered, "I needed a little change of environment."  
  
"Oh," He nodded then asked, "Don't you like my shirt?"  
  
"White isn't my color. How about we trade!" She said, eyeing his black t- shirt.  
  
A devilish look appeared on his face and he pulled off his shirt with great haste. She giggled slightly as he placed his hands at the hem of her (more like his) shirt. He slowly lifted it off of her, his hands grazing her skin. Once her shirt was off he pulled her into a kiss as he wrapped his arms around her. She kissed him back as her hands messed with his hair absently.  
  
He pulled away from the kiss and asked, "Where were we last night before Sara interrupted?"  
  
Jenna laughed and pulled out of Stu's arms a little so there was a little space between them. She lowered her hands to Stu's belt and started unbuckling. Soon she pulled the black belt out through the belt loops until it was out. She let it hit the ground and she kissed him softly.  
  
She laughed causing him to ask, "What's so funny?"  
  
"Nothing! I just know someone will walk in here any minute," She said, glancing at the door expectantly.  
  
He stared at the door in paranoia for a moment and sure enough it opened. Entered Kayleigh with her arms filled with things.  
  
Once she saw Stu she turned her back to him to hide her klepto inspired new findings. He naturally assumed it just was because both him and Jenna were shirtless.  
  
He scowled at Jenna and said, "See? You jinxed us!"  
  
"I'm sorry," She said with a pout, "I always do this! I can't watch Who Wants To Be A Millionaire because I always jinx the poor unsuspecting contestants."  
  
Kayleigh dumped her new possessions on the side of her bed that was unseen to Stu and suggested, "Perhaps you two should get dressed."  
  
Jenna bent down and picked up both the shirts and the belt. She handed the white shirt and the belt to Stu and pulled the black one on. She stuck her tongue out childishly and said, "It's mine now!"  
  
Stu grinned and shook his head while putting on his own shirt. He glanced awkwardly at Kayleigh and kissed Jenna on the cheek. He started heading toward the door saying, "I'm thinking that's my cue to go."  
  
"Good bye! Oh, can you go to Randy's and tell Sara to get over here?" Jenna asked.  
  
"What's the hurry?" Stu asked.  
  
Kayleigh shrugged and said the first thing that came to mind, "Ummm... I'm pregnant!"  
  
He looked at her with surprise then noticed her laughing eyes and said, "Whatever. I'll get her."  
  
He opened the door and left, closing the door. Jenna clapped excitedly and asked, "What did you get me?"  
  
Kayleigh grinned mysteriously and said, "I'll show you when Sara gets here."  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
"How's that witty comment coming along?" Randy asked.  
  
Sara shook her head disappointedly and said, "I got nothing!"  
  
"My apologies," Randy said insincerely. Then he asked, "Hey! Did you say Jenna and Stu almost had sex?"  
  
"Yeah," Sara spoke as though it was no big deal, "Luckily, I stopped them because..."  
  
"Virgins never die," They both said. Sara looked at him, amazed.  
  
"You and I... We're too compatible for our own good. Plus, the compatibility is going to waste by you hating me," Randy said, looking down at the movie littered floor.  
  
"Randy... Why did you do it?" Sara asked sadly.  
  
His eyes filled with dread as he answered, "Because my parents ignored the guidance councilor's suggestions of Anger Management."  
  
"Did you enjoy yourself?" Angriness and bitterness began to force its way into her voice.  
  
"No! God no! I would rather be on a Richard Simmons's Workout tape then do it again!" Randy said truthfully.  
  
She didn't say anything. She just moved a hand over to one of his and held it as she leaned her head against his shoulder. He stroked her hands and asked softly, "Have you forgiven me yet?"  
  
"No," She said instantly.  
  
He frowned but decided he was content and didn't want to ruin the 'moving' scene in the movie. The moment was ruined as a knock sounded. Sara sat straight up and quickly let go of his hand. He thought 'Damn it!' as he stood and walked to answer the door. He opened it and saw Stu.  
  
Stu smirked and asked, "Is Sara here?"  
  
"Why?" Randy narrowed his eyes out of suspicion.  
  
"Oh, I just wanted to know if she has yet to take my advice and swallow a bottle of aspirin," Stu replied coolly.  
  
"Fuck off!" Sara yelled out of anger as she leapt off of Randy's bed and stomped toward the door.  
  
"Awww... Aren't you just a peach and a half," Stu commented sarcastically?  
  
"Go light yourself on fire!" Sara snapped.  
  
"Right after you!" He said.  
  
"No, I insist! Ladies first!" She spat.  
  
"Ooh, burn," Randy muttered, laughing to himself.  
  
Not knowing what to say, Stu snarled angrily, "Look who's the whore now!"  
  
"It's still you!" She glared.  
  
"Well... YOUR A BITCH!!" He hesitated then yelled.  
  
"Yeah, that one sure will teach her," Randy shook his head, looking at Stu shamefully.  
  
Stu ignored Randy and asked Sara, "Don't you have a Muppet to rape, Vampira?"  
  
Sara, having no idea what she was saying yelled, "I would if all the freaking Muppets weren't already busy with you, bastard!"  
  
"You know what you just implied?" Randy asked her.  
  
"Probably not!" She yelled.  
  
Stu glared fiercely at her and said as calmly as he could (Not very calm), "Jenna and Kayleigh want you."  
  
Sara calmed down and said, "Oh. Okay."  
  
"You two are crazy!" Randy stated.  
  
"I prefer the term psychotic!" Both Sara and Stu said in unison.  
  
Sara glared at Stu and yelled, "STOP STEALING MY LINES!"  
  
He glared back and snapped, "It's not even your line!"  
  
"Bite me!" She pushed him out of her way and started heading back to her room to join Jenna and Kayleigh.  
  
"I would rather not!" He yelled after her.  
  
"Why aren't you on fire yet?" She yelled without turning around.  
  
Stu opened then closed his mouth angrily as she left sight with the turn of a corner. Randy looked at him amused and said, "You gotta love the crazy girl who wants your partner in crime to burst into flames."  
  
He just glared at Randy and shook a finger in a 'That's not funny' way.  
  
~*~*~  
  
She walked into the room to see Jenna and Kayleigh watch her expectantly. She closed the door and said, "Hunny! I'm home."  
  
"Who's your 'hunny'?" Jenna asked.  
  
"My imaginary friend, George. He's cool! He has blue hair, he can breathe fire, oh... and he's a Snowman!"  
  
The three of them laughed and Kayleigh soon said, "I shall show you guys the beautiful stolen artifacts now!"  
  
Jenna and Sara sat down on the bed next to Kayleigh's (Jenna's) and watched as she bent down and retrieved the yearbook. She tossed it over to them and Jenna caught it. Jenna smiled and said, "That's what I'm talking about!" (A/n: From now on Jenna, that is your saying. Yours' and the Glad people's.)  
  
"Oh there's more," Kayleigh laughed then said very Mr. Burns like, "Excellent!"  
  
"What else did you steal?" Sara asked.  
  
Kayleigh bent again and grabbed a small Zippo lighter with blue flames on it. She frowned at it and said, "Here Sara. This was Stevo's."  
  
Kayleigh tossed the lighter to Sara. She caught it and said sadly, "Thanks."  
  
"Why are you stealing things from Stevo?" Jenna asked, eyeing the Zippo.  
  
"He doesn't need it!" Kayleigh defended as she grabbed an unlabelled black tape. She tossed it to Jenna and said, "It's Stu's. I have no clue what it is."  
  
"I hope its not porn," Jenna said as she looked it over. She set the tape to the side, on top of the yearbook.  
  
"I stole some of Stu's shirts," Kayleigh admitted as she set five different colored shirts on the bed.  
  
"God, I think you have a problem, Miss Klepto," Sara muttered as she glared at the shirts.  
  
"And the final things I got was some of Stevo's hair dye. The dead bastard was holding out on me," Kayleigh dumped three boxes of red, blue and black hair dye on the bed.  
  
"Damn Randy to hell for making me miss out on the stealing," Sara pouted as she flipped her new lighter open and closed.  
  
"I don't mind missing out. Distracting Stu was glorious!" Jenna smiled.  
  
"You looked to be enjoying yourself," Kayleigh commented.  
  
"Eww! Stu disgusts me," Sara said bitterly.  
  
Jenna shrugged and said, "We should look at the yearbook."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Author's Note:  
  
Okay, that chapter was random. I don't like it. I like where I yell at Stu but I thought (as usual) it sucked. Did you like that chapter? I kinda did but didn't.  
  
Hey, ya know what rocks? The movie 'Cheats' does! Its main character Handsome (Yes, that's his name) is my newest favorite movie character. Go see it because it is great.... Cheaters rock...  
  
Well, I got to go attempt to update my Thirteen Ghosts fic.  
  
Love to all- SARA 


	23. The Yearbook

Quote: "I say rise up against them and stab them with your plastic forks!" Mark, Pump Up The Volume  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The three of them looked down upon the thin white book, reading the red lettering that read 'Woodsboro High School'. The date on it was only last year.  
  
Jenna opened the book to the first page, which was just covered with signatures and little 'Have a great rest of your life' things written on it. She glanced at Sara and Kayleigh who read the messages. Sara cringed and read out loud, "'Hey Stu, Your the greatest! I'm sorry about Tatum! Love ya, Lindie."  
  
"Who's Tatum?" Jenna asked.  
  
"What kind of name is Tatum? That's just crazy," Kayleigh commented.  
  
"'I know we have had a really bad year but at least school is out! When you go to college make sure you party like its high school all over gain! Keep it real, Mike," Sara read.  
  
Jenna snickered and said, "Look how many girls have things in common with you, Sara? There are like ten 'Stu, I hate you's' from Claire, Molly, Missy, Irene, Jamie and so on."  
  
"See? He is a slut! Why else would girls hate him?" Sara grinned, knowing she was right.  
  
"Maybe it's his bubbly personality," Kayleigh shrugged.  
  
Sara and Jenna mouthed the word 'bubbly' and shook it off. Jenna turned the page to see the words 'In Loving Memory of...' More signatures covered the page. As did four large photographs.  
  
Jenna's eyes widened slightly as she read 'Tatum Riley' underneath a picture of a girl. (A/n: You've seen her so I don't feel like elaborating on what she looks like. Why? Cuz I'm lazy!) Right beside the picture were the scrawled words that read, "I'm sorry about your girlfriend, Stu. May God bless Tatum's soul!"  
  
"That Tatum girl dated Stu," Kayleigh realized.  
  
"No wonder she's dead. She probably killed herself. I know I would!" Sara laughed then stopped when she noticed Jenna's serious expression.  
  
"That's not funny," Jenna said with a sad hint in her voice.  
  
Sara forced a laugh then asked, "How come you mocked the people murdered not two days ago but you're all serious and mournful for this chick you've never met?"  
  
"She too was murdered," Kayleigh, said.  
  
"How do you know that?" Sara asked, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Because it says 'These murders sure were a riot' and it's signed by Randy," Jenna answered.  
  
Sara rolled her eyes even though she was a tad bit taken aback about the whole thing. She looked at her friends then lied, "I don't give a damn about any of this."  
  
~*~*~FLASHBACK~*~*~  
  
"Hey loser, are you going to sign my yearbook?" Stu asked as he handed the book to Randy.  
  
Randy took and opened the book and glanced at all the signatures, "God, do any of these sheep know how to write their last names? There are about twenty Jennifers in this school yet each one think you'll know which one they are. Plus, none of them even write anything memorable! 'Have a great life' and 'Tatum and Stu forever in spirit' are written everywhere. Its fucking crazy!"  
  
"Just sign it!" Stu ordered.  
  
"Fine!" Randy flipped the page and let out a laugh as he looked at the 'In loving memory...' page and commented, "Notice how they didn't put up a picture of Mr. Billy Loomis? I wonder why."  
  
Stu grinned evilly and said, "Might have something to do with the fact that he is the 'killer'."  
  
Randy glanced around the cafeteria to see the many seniors clamoring around, having one another sign the 'significant' yearbook. He looked back at Stu and said, "I'll sign the magical book just like everyone else."  
  
Randy grabbed a black pen off of the table he sat at and ripped the cap off, throwing it to the ground. He looked down at the memorial page and wrote quickly, as though he already planned what he would write. He threw the book back at Stu. Stu read out loud what Randy wrote, "'These murders sure were a riot! Burn in hell, Stu! Your pal, Randy!' I will burn in hell, right next to you."  
  
Randy smirked slightly as he took the book back and flipped through it. He stopped on a page and wrote something down hastily. Before Stu took his book back Randy said, "I just stated the obvious."  
  
Stu snatched the book and chuckled at what he saw. The words 'Fucking crazy' were written with an arrow drawn pointing to Sidney Prescott. His smile vanished when he saw 'Man slut' with the arrow pointed to himself, whose picture was located a few down from Sidney's. He glared at Randy and snatched the pen violently from Randy and wrote 'Geek' across Randy's picture. His photographic face was covered. Stu grinned mischievously as he held the book in front of Randy so he could see he newly fashioned picture.  
  
Randy laughed and said coolly, "Good! I don't photograph well."  
  
Stu flipped the pages back to the memorial page and said kind of dementedly, "They can put up a picture of Tatum. They can put up a picture of out late principal, Principal Himbry, which might I add is larger then the rest. They can put up pictures of everyone's favorite dead couple, Casey Becker and football player Steve Orith. But where is the tribute to the killer who murdered them all? Huh?! Answer me that!"  
  
"Billy is unworthy of idolism and if there was a tribute to him the little munchkins who hate the world and slit their wrists will go off and steal his as well as our ways and then I would be pissed off!" Randy answered calmly.  
  
"I was talking about..." Stu glanced around then leaned in and whispered, "I was talking about the better killer. I was talking about me, man!"  
  
Randy shook his head slightly and asked, "What are they gonna do? Put a picture of the costume and entitle it 'The veteran who murdered our friends'?"  
  
Stu laughed and muttered, "Veteran... I like the sound of that."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Kayleigh watched Sara carefully and stated, "I think you do care, Sara. Randy is crazy! He just said that the murders at his high school where 'a riot' right after murders going on here. Strange, I think."  
  
"Shut up! I don't care! I don't even like him anymore," Sara lied.  
  
Jenna closed the book and said seriously, "I need to talk to Stu..."  
  
"Why? Because he probably is a murderer or because you want to lose your essence?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
Jenna jumped up off the bed and said, "Both!"  
  
"Oh no you don't!" Sara replied.  
  
"Why not? I need answers! I gotta know if my boyfriend likes killing people as a pastime!" Jenna started walking towards the door to leave.  
  
Both Sara and Kayleigh followed. Kayleigh saying, "How stupid do I look? We aren't going to have you kill yourself for sex!"  
  
"I'm going with you because I feel like pissing Stu off," Sara said  
  
"Be careful, he might kill you," Kayleigh teased.  
  
"Shut up!" Jenna snapped as she opened the door.  
  
"Fine! I'll piss Stu off then I'll go yell at Randy for killing people," Sara laughed.  
  
"Brilliant plan," Jenna commented.  
  
"I'm going to rob Randy while I'm at it...." Sara said innocently as she skipped down the halls.  
  
"Sara, did you forget your crazy pills?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"Yeah, I took them all for myself," Jenna answered.  
  
Sara laughed insanely and said jokingly, "Damn you, Jenna! Damn you like the bastards from AOL who are ripping you off because you use the free disc! Damn you!"  
  
Jenna grinned and said, "Lets go piss Stu off and make him all paranoid!"  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
AH! It's so short. Don't worry, I plan to update soon. Very soon in fact.... Next chapter will be interesting. 


	24. Revenge Is Sweet

The three of them walked until they reached Stu's door. Jenna glanced at Kayleigh and Sara then knocked on the door. They all watched the door expectantly in silence. Well, silence until Sara commented hopefully, "Maybe he's dead."  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and sighed. Kayleigh kicked the door for no reason and stared, "He's not there."  
  
"That's right! He's right behind you," A voice said from behind them, causing them all to jump.  
  
They looked to see the new intruder was Stu. He grinned and asked, "Miss me so soon, Jenna?"  
  
"Oh yeah," She replied sarcastically.  
  
"You two sicken me," Sara said in disgust.  
  
"Thanks pal!" Jenna flashed Sara a cheesy smile.  
  
Kayleigh bopped her head and asked Stu suspiciously, "Where were you?"  
  
"I was just talking with Randy," He answered.  
  
"I think your lying," Sara said, glaring at him.  
  
He rolled his eyes and said, "You saw me there, Vampira. How can you say I'm lying?"  
  
He moved through them and opened the door to his room. He walked in with the three of them following. Jenna closed the door behind her and said casually, "It's funny how you can know someone and they lie to you...."  
  
Sara laughed and jumped onto Stevo's bed. She glared at Stu as he sat on his own bed. She stuck her tongue out at him as if she was five and said, "You suck!"  
  
Stu rolled his eyes, looked to Jenna as she sat next to him and asked whining, "Why did you have to bring Sara? I mean, Kayleigh is cool but why Sara? Couldn't you give her a bottle of sleeping pills?"  
  
Jenna sighed and answered, "They followed me! For some reason neither trust me with you."  
  
Kayleigh glanced around the room mischievously, having the urge to steal more shirts. She snickered and said slyly, repeating what Randy had written in the yearbook, "These murders sure were a riot."  
  
"Oh yeah..." Stu answered uncomfortably, tensing up.  
  
Sara twirled her hair absently as she asked bluntly, "Kill anyone lately, Stu?"  
  
Jenna and Stu shared a horrified look. Stu was horrified just by the accusation, Jenna was horrified by her friends unsubtleness. Sara, realizing she shouldn't have asked that, laughed a forced laugh and said, "I was kidding! God! No one gets me."  
  
Jenna look relieved and asked Kayleigh, in order to change the subject, "So Kayleigh, how are you?"  
  
"I'm fine...." Kayleigh answered, sending her a look that said 'Your fucking crazy!'  
  
Stu wrapped his arms around Jenna causing Sara to yell, "Eww! Don't touch her, Man Whore!"  
  
"Man whore!" Kayleigh laughed, pointing at Stu only to stop immediately.  
  
"You know, in high school we were crazy. Were you crazy?" Jenna asked out of the blue, trying to get answers.  
  
"I bet he was a man whore," Sara stated, reaching in her jean pockets and pulling out Stevo's Zippo. She flipped it open and watched the flame.  
  
He glared at her and said, "And I bet you were arrested for arson, you pyro!"  
  
Jenna smirked knowing that was true. She elbowed Stu slightly and ordered, "Answer the question! Were you crazy?"  
  
"Yeah I was! High school was a great crazy party," He answered with an evilish look in his eyes.  
  
"Was Randy crazy too?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"Naw, he was a geek. He spent all of high school working in a video store," Stu answered, shrugging.  
  
Sara jumped up off the bed, pocketing the now closed Zippo. She pointed dangerously at Stu and said, "That is why Randy is god!"  
  
"I thought you didn't like Randy anymore," Jenna stated.  
  
Kayleigh patted Sara on the head and said, "Jenna makes a good point. I think you love Randy!"  
  
Sara glared at them all and said, "Well...Stu is a man whore!!"  
  
Stu blinked in silence as Jenna said, "We've already covered that! Stu is a man whore and you all think I'm going to seal my fate for sex. Can we move on to your denial now?"  
  
"I hate Randy so shut up!" Sara replied defensively.  
  
"Sara, you referred to him as god..." Kayleigh reminded.  
  
Sara fidgeted then stormed over to Stu and slapped him. She yelled, "Damn you!"  
  
He held his face where she slapped him. He glared at her and yelled, "YOU FUCKING BITCH!"  
  
He tried lunging at Sara but Jenna held him down, ordering him, "Stop it! Don't touch her!"  
  
He still tried lunging as Sara ran and hid behind Kayleigh, yelling, "Ah! He's going to kill me just like the rest!"  
  
This made him stop his failed attempts at killing Sara. A look of worry covered his face as he asked in an attempted 'calm' tone, "What the hell does that mean?"  
  
"It means nothing," Jenna insisted, "Sara is just a psychopath who forgot her medication."  
  
Stu still remained tense as he glared at where Sara hid which still was behind Kayleigh. Kayleigh glanced around nervously as she asked, "Why are you glaring at me, man?"  
  
"I'm glaring at Sara!" He explained.  
  
"Oh, great!" She sighed, relieved.  
  
"Stu, just calm down and stop freaking out! Sara, apologize for slapping Stu!" Jenna commanded.  
  
Stu frowned as Sara stuck her head out from behind Kayleigh and said, "I'm sorry, man whore!"  
  
"See, that's better!" Jenna nodded.  
  
Kayleigh turned around and looked at Sara, saying, "You should go see Randy."  
  
Sara narrowed her eyes and replied, "Why? Its not like I love him so... LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
  
"Either you leave or you make Stu get all violent and crazy. It's up to you," Jenna spoke calmly.  
  
"Jenna, your my hero!" Sara saluted Jenna and started walking toward the door. She smiled innocently at Stu and said, "Go to hell, Stu!"  
  
"Have fun with Randy but not too much fun. I'll stay here and watch these too," Kayleigh waved to Sara.  
  
She opened the door and Sara was gone. Stu looked over to Jenna and asked, "How do you put up with her?"  
  
"Lots of liquor..." Jenna answered.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara stomped her way to where she remembered Randy's room being. She glared at the door as she knocked, thinking bitterly, "I do not like Randy."  
  
Moments later the door opened but it wasn't Randy who greeted her it was a tall lanky boy with dark blonde hair. He wore a pair of black round sunglasses, which caused Sara to ask immediately, "Why are you wear sunglasses inside?"  
  
He smiled and said, "Because I look cool."  
  
She nodded and replied, "Fair enough. Is Randy here?"  
  
The guy pulled off his sunglasses and looked her up and down with his eyes. He smirked and said, "I'm Brock, Brock Hudson."  
  
"Umm... Hi! I'm Sara Black," She said uncertainly.  
  
His eyes widened slightly, asking, "Your Sara? Randy's Sara?"  
  
She frowned and asked again, "Is Randy here or not?"  
  
He put his sunglasses back on and said, "He's sleeping."  
  
"Oh..." Sara said disappointedly.  
  
Brock grinned causing dimples to show then said, "Well, I'm not sleeping."  
  
"I see that," She sighed.  
  
Brock moved out of the way and said, "Come on in and we can watch Randy sleep."  
  
"Fine..." She said, walking past him into the room.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Stu, tell me about what it was like for you in high school?" Jenna asked.  
  
Stu shrugged and answered, "It was a blast. Why do you ask?"  
  
"I'm just wondering. No need for the paranoia!" She got off of his bed and walked over to Stevo's side of the room.  
  
Jenna sat down next to Kayleigh who sat on Stevo's bed coloring her nails black with a permanent marker. Kayleigh glanced up and said, "I'm bored."  
  
"Me too!" Stu admitted then asked, "What do you want to do?"  
  
"Lets go drinking!" Jenna suggested.  
  
Stu's face lit up then darkened when Kayleigh said, "I don't have a car, do you?"  
  
Jenna and Stu both said in scary unison, "Nope."  
  
Jenna pouted and stated, "No one is crazy enough to give Sara a car."  
  
Stu thought then said, "Randy's prick of a roommate has a car."  
  
"We could steal it from him!" Kayleigh said excitedly.  
  
Jenna shrugged and suggested, "Or we could borrow it."  
  
"Ooh, good plan," Stu squealed.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara sat next to Brock on his bed, a large gap between them. He watched her watching Randy. Randy slept with the blanket pulled over his head. She glanced away from his sleeping body and noticed his roommate staring at her. She, filled with paranoia asked, "What is it?"  
  
"So your Randy's girl?" Brock asked.  
  
Sara glared at him in hatred and said coldly, "I hate Randy!"  
  
"Then why are you here?"  
  
"Oh, I'm here for you," She said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.  
  
"I thought so... Did you know I was on the Real World?" Brock smiled conceitedly.  
  
"That show sucks..." Sara replied honestly.  
  
Brock looked down, sad. Then he looked up and said, "I have a tattoo!"  
  
"Ooh! Me too. Let me see!" She smiled.  
  
He rolled up his gray t-shirt's sleeve and revealed a tattoo of himself. Sara laughed and asked, "You really like yourself, don't you?"  
  
"Well, I am Brock," He said as though this explained everything.  
  
"Right," She looked back to Randy and asked, "Do you think Randy would be pissed if I woke him?"  
  
Broke responded boredly, "No. You are his girlfriend after all."  
  
"No I am not!" She snapped.  
  
He grinned and said, "Then prove it and kiss me."  
  
"No," Sara said instantly.  
  
Then Brock leaned over and kissed her. She pushed him away and looked over at the heap that was Randy. She glared at Brock and said, "Randy is going to wake up and kick your ass."  
  
"He wont wake up," Brock insisted, leaning in and kissing Sara again. This time when their lips met the image of Randy and slutty Shannon together flashed through her head. Anger filled her mind and she kissed Brock back thinking, "Revenge is sweet."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Jenna, Kayleigh and Stu walked down the hall, heading toward Randy's room. They turned a corner and came face to face with Randy. Stu asked, "Where is Sara?"  
  
"How should I know?' Randy asked in confusion.  
  
"She went to see you," Jenna answered.  
  
Randy nodded then said, "Oh! Okay!" Then he turned and started walking in the direction of his room.  
  
The three exchanged looks and followed him. Kayleigh whispered, "He loves her."  
  
"I don't know why he should. She is like Satan except blonde," Stu replied.  
  
~*~*~  
  
They continued to kiss, Sara getting rather bored. She was still angry at Randy she continued the kissing. Every so often she glanced over at the Randy lump, expecting him to wake up. Then she heard the door behind her open. She didn't pull apart from Brock until she heard Randy's voice say in disbelief, "What the fuck?"  
  
She pushed away from Brock and glanced from Randy's bed to the door where he stood. She stood off of the bed and stared at Randy, Stu, Jenna and Kayleigh standing behind him. She walked over to his bed and pushed down on the blanket lump. With pressure she felt nothing but the cushiony feel of pillows. She looked back at Randy and said calmly, "Revenge is sweet."  
  
Randy walked in, glancing from Brock who looked rather cocky to Sara. He stood an inch or so away from her and repeated, "Revenge?"  
  
"Yes! You kiss a whore I kiss your roommate!" She yelled.  
  
"Shannon wasn't a whore!" Randy defended.  
  
Jenna, from the door way said, "Bad move Randy."  
  
"Agreed! If your going to try and win the girl back you don't defend the girl you cheated with," Kayleigh commented.  
  
Randy looked Sara straight in the eyes, hurt billowing behind his as he said, "I'm not sure I want to win her back."  
  
Brock stood up, put his hand on Randy's shoulder. He smiled innocently and said, "You can't blame the girl. I am Brock after all."  
  
Sara glared at Brock and suggested, "Go away, Brock."  
  
"Fine!" Brock turned and started walking out the door, winking at Jenna and Kayleigh on his way out.  
  
"Sara, I can't believe you!" Randy sighed in frustration.  
  
"I can't believe you!" She spat.  
  
Stu rolled his eyes and said, "Why don't you two kiss and make up?"  
  
The two looked at him and yelled, "No!"  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
I'll update soon, I hope... Who knows? 


	25. Conflicts and Comparisons

Stu, Jenna and Kayleigh still stood in the doorway watching Randy and Sara argue. Randy, glaring at Sara asked angrily, "Do you think we're even now or something?"  
  
Stu, who was thoroughly enjoying himself looked at Jenna and said, "I told you your friend was a slut. See how quickly she moves on?"  
  
Kayleigh rolled her eyes and said, "Shut up!"  
  
"Yeah!" Jenna smacked the back of Stu's head, not hard enough for it to hurt but just enough so she could get her point across.  
  
Even though he wasn't in pain he rubbed the back of his head nonetheless. He looked down at her and asked in an annoyed tone, "What was that for?"  
  
"I'm tired of you insulting her so shut the fuck up!" Jenna answered angrily.  
  
"I second that!" Kayleigh nodded.  
  
"See Stu, you suck!" Sara smiled at her friends then when back to returning Randy's glares.  
  
"I'm mad at you Stu!" Kayleigh said.  
  
"Are you mad at me?" Randy asked, pausing then continuing the glare fest.  
  
"Nope! Video geeks are gods!" Kayleigh answered happily.  
  
Jenna agreed, "That is so true."  
  
"What did I do?" Stu asked, highly confused.  
  
"You pissed me off!" Jenna explained.  
  
Kayleigh yawned then said tiredly, "I'm going to go get drunk. I'll see you whenever."  
  
"Have fun!" Jenna said, waving farewell to her.  
  
"I will! You have fun too," She sent Stu a cold look then started walking off. (Authors note: Kayleigh, I fear you have a drinking problem.)  
  
"Anyway," Sara shook her head then said to Randy, in response to his question, "No! I didn't kiss stupid Brock just so we would be even! Well, maybe but who cares!"  
  
"I care!" He yelled with a roll of his eyes.  
  
Stu rolled his eyes as well and ordered, "Just admit that you love each other already!"  
  
"Bite me!" Sara snarled.  
  
"You seem to be asking a lot of guys to do that," Stu commented menacingly.  
  
Jenna smacked the back of Stu's head again, this time harder. He glared slightly at her and yelled, "STOP IT!"  
  
"No!" She yelled back. She crossed her arms over her chest and said, "I'm leaving!"  
  
"Good!" Stu replied, crossing his arms over his chest as well.  
  
"I'll see you after me and Randy finish our dispute," Sara said oddly cheerfully.  
  
"Bye!" Jenna yelled, not really intending to yell. She turned from them and stomped off loudly, her stomps echoing.  
  
Stu shook his head in even more confusion, muttering, "Women... Can't live with them, can't live with out them."  
  
Randy turned from Sara and walked toward the door. He pushed Stu so he was completely out of the doorway. He sighed and said, "Me and Sara need to talk. Go off and play with yourself."  
  
"Fine, I will!" Stu yelled then said, "Wait! No I won't..."  
  
"Bye Stu," Randy closed the door on his friend, locking it.  
  
"Why did you lock it?" Sara inquired nervously.  
  
He turned back to her and answered, "Its to prevent you from storming away before I finish talking to you."  
  
She, still nervous, asked with an added nervous laugh, "Your not going to kill me are you?"  
  
~*~*~  
  
Jenna entered her empty room, slamming the door behind her. She collapsed on her bed thinking, "Stu is such a drama queen."  
  
She sat up, her back to the door and reached under her bed. She retrieved Stu's yearbook and flipped it open. She kept turning the pages until she got to the senior pictures. She continued to turn the pages until she got to the page with Stu's picture on it. She repeated his written name out loud, "Stu Macher."  
  
She heard the door behind her open but she didn't bother to see who it was. She figured Kayleigh would be too busy getting drunk to come home so soon. Sara probably would hurry back because she seemed pissed at Randy. Jenna grinned and said, "You sure got back quick."  
  
Silence...  
  
Jenna, still staring down at the picture of Stu asked, "Do you think Stu will claim 'Macher' is yet another typo?"  
  
"No," The familiar voice said with rage hinging on the tone, "I'm going to ask how the hell you got my yearbook."  
  
Jenna let out a gasp and dropped the book to the ground. She jumped up and turned to see Stu standing there looking rather menacing.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"Of course I won't kill you! I'll just yell at you," Randy insisted as Sara backed away.  
  
She narrowed her eyes out of suspicion and fumed, "I can't even believe you're mad at me."  
  
He waved his hands in the air and said, "Well you were making out with my roommate just to spite me."  
  
"Like you didn't do the same to me with Shannon," Sara pointed out, not backing away anymore.  
  
"You made out with Brock!" He said simply.  
  
She rolled her eyes and commanded, "Stop dwelling."  
  
"It just happened a few minutes ago!"  
  
"And you still won't let it go!"  
  
"Your unbelievable!" He sat down on his bed, sighing exasperatedly.  
  
"I'm taking that as a compliment," She grinned and sat beside him.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Jenna's eyes were wide with fear as she backed away from Stu. He walked around her bed, pursuing her. She, her heart pounding quickly said, "Stu... What are you doing here?"  
  
Fear sounded in her voice causing Stu to smirk evilly. With his eyes set on her dangerously he answered, "I'm here because I wanted to apologize for what ever made you mad."  
  
"Oh," She wanted to keep the subject away from the yearbook and said quickly, "Your forgiven."  
  
"Why do you have my yearbook?" He asked in an eerily calm voice.  
  
She couldn't think about a good lie so she decided to play dumb and asked, "What yearbook?"  
  
"'What yearbook?'" He repeated, still calm. Then his tone changed to a harsh angry tone as he again repeated, "'WHAT YEARBOOK?'"  
  
He reached over to the dresser in-between Jenna and Kayleigh's beds and grabbed a lamp. He pulled the cord out of the outlet and threw the lamp against the wall causing the bulb to break. Darkness overcame that side of the room and Jenna tripped and fell back on Kayleigh's unmade bed. She shook slightly as she insisted, "I didn't look at it I swear!"  
  
"Well, then tell me where you got the name 'Macher' from!" He walked until he stood over her.  
  
"I'm psychic," She chuckled nervously as she stared up at Stu.  
  
"Wrong answer!" He returned to his calm tone. Suddenly he clapped his hands together causing her to flinch.  
  
He frowned at her and turned and started walking away. He stopped and bent down and grabbed his yearbook. He shut it loudly and continued his way to the door. He opened the door and looked at her. He put his index finger to his lips and made a 'Shhh' sound. He laughed insanely and walked out, slamming the door shut behind him. Jenna, filled with terror slowly got up from the bed. She shook violently as she ran to the door and locked it. She looked down at the black t-shirt she wore and remembered it was Stu's. She quickly pulled it off and threw it on the ground. She walked to the closet and grabbed her SLC Punk shirt. The picture on it was Matthew Lillard's character and it said 'I am not a fucking hick' on it. She pulled the shirt on and said in a frail whisper, "Stu is a fucking nut."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Randy frowned and asked as he looked down at the movie littered floor, "Is Brock a better kisser then me?"  
  
"I don't know. Is Shannon a better kisser then me?" Sara asked back.  
  
He quickly looked up and a smile spread across his face. He said casually, "There is only one way to find out."  
  
She raised her eyebrows questioningly and blondly asked, "How?"  
  
"Comparing," He answered simply.  
  
She thought then said in realization, "Oh! Okay, I get it."  
  
"Good thing," He said as he put his hands on either side of her face. He breathed in deeply then leaned in and kissed her.  
  
Once their lips finally parted Sara asked, "Does the whore kiss better than me?"  
  
"Nope," He answered instantly then said, "Same question to you."  
  
"Well..... Nope," She smiled at his nervous look when she faked hesitation.  
  
He clapped his hands together happily and said, "We need a movie to celebrate!"  
  
"Anything but porn," She said as he reached down and grabbed a movie from the floor.  
  
He grinned and asked, "Is Heathers okay?"  
  
"Yes!" Sara squealed, "That movie is the shit!"  
  
He nodded in agreement and leaned over to the lower edge of his bed where the television set sat. He put the DVD in and quoted from the film, "'I love my dead gay son!'"  
  
Sara laughed and said, "JD is god!"  
  
"Everyone is god to you women," He commented as he moved back and laid down oh the bed, a remote in hand.  
  
Sara laid back putting her head on his shoulder. She laughingly said, "If it makes you feel any better I think movie store geeks are god, too."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Author's note:  
  
Hahaha, I'm such a freak. See, as one couple breaks another repairs. HEATHERS ROCKS! Enjoy! 


	26. Fear and Loathing in Film Class

Randy woke up to the sound of knocking. His eyes shot open and he tried to sit up but something weighed him down. He looked to what it was and saw Sara lying against him, asleep. He smiled and shook her gently, saying softly, "Sara, wake up."  
  
Sara stirred until her eyes fluttered open. As soon as she saw Randy she smiled dreamily then a look of worry covered her face as she shot up, looked around and asked, "What time is it?"  
  
The knocking continued and someone from outside the door who sounded a lot like Brock yelled, muffled through the door, "Let me in! I gotta get my book for class!"  
  
Randy looked around frantically for his alarm clock. When he saw it he said, "Damn it!"  
  
"What?" Sara asked, tiredness in her voice.  
  
"Film starts in five minute," Randy answered, shooing her out of bed.  
  
She got up leisurely and asked, "Do we have to go?"  
  
"Yes, or Stu, Jenna, and Kayleigh will think we are dead or something," Randy got out of bed and rushed to the door, opening it to Brock.  
  
Brock walked in, saw Sara and squealed, "Now I see why I got locked out..." He looked to Randy, "You've finally become a man. Congratulations, son."  
  
Sara glared at him as Randy said, "You got locked out because you're a dumbass who forgets his keys."  
  
"Don't talk to Brock that way!" Brock ordered, not offended in the least.  
  
"Sara, lets go!" Randy commanded.  
  
"We don't have time to change?" Sara asked whiningly.  
  
Randy shook his head and Sara asked, "How does my hair look?"  
  
"You look gorgeous. Your hair is fabulous! Lets go," Randy lied. Her hair was frizzy and stuck up in random places.  
  
She smiled and agreed, "Okay. Let's go! Brock, you suck!"  
  
Brock, searching for his book, distractedly said, "Thank you!"  
  
Randy took Sara by the hand and started running off, pulling Sara behind him.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Jenna walked alone to Film. Neither of her roommates had returned to the room last night. Jenna hoped at least one of them, if not both would show up to class. She entered the class slowly, herself being fairly early. She looked around and stopped breathing as soon as she saw the only person in the class besides Mr. Connors. Stu sat there in the front row, looking at her just as he had last night. He sported the same exact menacing yet calm look. He smirked evilly and said calmly, "Hello Jenna."  
  
She, realizing she wasn't breathing started gasping for air. Her eyes widened out of fear. Then she narrowed them in determination as she walked to the back corner of the classroom, sitting in the corner desk in silence. This caused Stu to start laughing to himself. He shook his head and muttered, "Jenna, Jenna, Jenna..."  
  
He walked to the back where she was and stood in front of her, his hands on the desktop. As he spoke his voice grew more menacing while saying, "Awww... Why aren't you sitting with me Jenna? Are you mad at me?"  
  
She avoided looking him in the eyes as she asked frailly, "Why do you keep bothering me, Stu?"  
  
"I thought we were going steady, baby!" Stu laughed loudly.  
  
Jenna, attempting to ignore him grabbed a pencil off the floor. She examined it with false interest as Stu continued with his psychotic comments, "Was it something I said?"  
  
"Leave me alone!" She commanded rather loudly.  
  
Stu without saying a word grabbed her pencil and snapped it in two. He smiled down at her with great innocence.  
  
"Mr. Killings, that will be enough!" Mr. Connors said loud and sternly.  
  
Stu turned around quickly and looked at the teacher. He, still sporting the false look of innocence asked, "Can I help you, sir?"  
  
Jenna, under her breath muttered, "Macher."  
  
Stu's head shot back to her instantly, glaring at her dangerously. She started to shake slightly before Mr. Connors ordered, "Return to your seat, Mr. Killings."  
  
Stu rolled his eyes and started heading back to his seat, saying with hate in his eyes, "This isn't second grade."  
  
"Maybe for you," The familiar voice of Kayleigh said as she wobbled into the class.  
  
She giggled then stopped dead in her tracks when she noticed how far apart Stu and Jenna sat. She glanced at both of them and asked, "Are you still fighting?"  
  
He glared at Jenna as though to say 'You best not have told her about our fight'. Jenna, getting what he was telling her said nothing. Kayleigh shrugged and started heading to the back to sit with Jenna. She sat and more people started coming in, all of them avoided the back row where the 'freaks' sat. Jenna watched the entrance, hoping and waiting for Sara to come.  
  
Kayleigh giggled and said, "I met a guy last night."  
  
"When you were drunk?" Jenna raised her eyebrows in skepticism.  
  
Kayleigh nodded eagerly and said, "Yeah! His name is Ryan and he's the greatest!"  
  
"And you were drunk?" Jenna watched as just about everyone took their seat in the large room. No Sara or Randy.  
  
"What?" Kayleigh inquired, "Are you implying that he isn't a great guy but that I was drunk and didn't know better?"  
  
"You said it not me," Jenna watched as Mr. Connors got ready to start the class. Still no Sara.  
  
~*~*~  
  
They stood outside the building where Film was held. Sara stopped Randy and stated, "Were going to be late."  
  
"Better late than never!" Randy shrugged as he entered the building.  
  
She pouted, following him in and whined, "But I wanna ditch!"  
  
"We're already here," He pointed out as they stood outside the room.  
  
Sara kissed him on the cheek then opened the door for Randy so he would have to enter first. Randy entered, all eyes on him with Sara hiding behind him. She took her book from him and looked around at all the staring eyes. She gave them all the evil eye then asked fiercely, "What?!"  
  
Some people started snickering as Sara took Randy by the hand and led him to the sacred back row, everyone still watching them. As she moved she muttered, "Fucking sheep."  
  
Sara sat down next to Kayleigh who, along with Jenna, grinned at them. Randy sat beside her and scanned the room for Stu. He shrugged and immediately gave up the search. The room was still silent until Sara ordered Mr. Connors, "Dude, do what you're being paid for. Teach us something rather than contemplating child molestation."  
  
This made Mr. Connors blush and start rambling on boringly about something or another. Jenna, still grinning at them asked, "So I guess you two made up."  
  
"Maybe," Randy said in attempt to be mysterious.  
  
Stu sat there alone, fuming on the inside. Jenna every now and then glanced in his direction fearfully. She thought each time, "I hate him..."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
Jenna is turning into me... Ahhhh! 


	27. The Tale of the Body Thief

Author's note:  
  
Oh crap! NO, damn it, NO! I totally forgot but Kayleigh isn't in Film. DAMN IT! Well, Fuck!!! Okay, how about we pretend she never was there... Damn it! I hate my little mistakes.... Okay, so we're going to act like she wasn't there in the last chapter.... Don't worry Kayleigh, I'll make it up to you!  
  
~*~*~  
  
Class was over and everyone left as Randy, Jenna and Sara sat there, talking amongst themselves. Sara asked unintentionally loudly, "Are you and the prick Stu fighting still?"  
  
Jenna looked to the front to see if Stu was still there but couldn't see through the group of standing descending classmates. She figured Stu had left so she answered softly, "I kind of hate him."  
  
"Just two days ago you were on the verge of essence loss," Sara pointed out.  
  
"What about you?" Jenna quickly changed the subject from her and Stu, "You don't come back to the room then you waltz in here with Randy doing the walk of shame."  
  
Sara grinned, looked at Randy and said in an 'I-told-you-so' tone, "We really should have changed!"  
  
Jenna, again changing the subject asked skeptically, "If you two weren't getting fresh with one another than what the hell were you doing?"  
  
"Watching movies," Randy and Sara answered in unison.  
  
"Ah," Jenna nodded understandingly, "Movie geeks are gods!"  
  
"I try," Randy shrugged modestly.  
  
Sara watched Jenna carefully as though scanning for emotion as she asked, "Do you really hate Stu? It's understandable but why the sudden change of heart? Is this another one of your Jedi mind tricks?"  
  
Jenna glanced around the basically empty room then stopped when her eyes widened and landed on Stu Macher who stared at the group as though he listened in. Noticing that he finally caught Jenna's eye he headed to the back where they sat. He glared at each individual, specifically at Randy and Jenna. Then, before he could be greeted he asked in a psychotic tone, "So you hate me Jenna? Why is that?"  
  
Sara stood up, noticing everyone else was gone and Mr. Connors awaited their departure. She looked at all her seated friends and said, "Lets go. By the way Stu, she hates you because you suck."  
  
Jenna didn't move as Randy slid out of his seat and stood on either side of Sara. Randy grinned goofily as he asked, "Where were you Stu? I was looking all over for you!"  
  
"Its understandable that you didn't see me," Stu began casually then added angrily, "You were to busy being led around by your whore!"  
  
Sara moved past Randy until she stood in front of the blocking Stu. She shoved him out of the way causing him to stumble backward slightly. Jenna shot out of her seat and yelled, "Sara, don't!"  
  
"I knew you still had feelings for Stu," Sara teased then went back to her pissed-off-at-Stu state.  
  
Stu moved swiftly toward Sara but stopped dead in his tracks as Mr. Connor's voice echoed, "You four, take it outside."  
  
"FINE!" Stu and Sara yelled back.  
  
They all walked out of the classroom, each one of them sending the teacher a dark look. Jenna with her arms crossed over her chest as though for safety kept a great distance between herself and Stu. They kept on walking in silence up until they were outside. Once they were there Randy asked, "Why do you two always have to fight? You're really pissing me off."  
  
"I agree," Jenna said in her frail voice.  
  
Stu glared at her and yelled as he waved his arms in the air frantically, "Jenna agrees, everyone! Yippee fucking skippee!" Then he jumped right up in her face and asked calmly, "I guess were breaking up, eh?"  
  
She looked to the ground causing him to scream, "LOOK AT ME!"  
  
Jenna quickly did as she was told and looked up, right into his menacing eyes. Hate became to overcome her fear as she screamed back, "GO TO HELL!!!"  
  
Sara and Randy exchanged confused looks. Then Sara walked over and stood between them. She shoved Stu away and asked, looking at Jenna, "What the fuck is up with the two of you?"  
  
"Yesterday you couldn't keep your hands off each other and now you can't stop fighting!" Randy pointed out.  
  
"Oh my god!" Sara squealed, her eyes widening as she said, "Your not turning into me, Jenna. You are me."  
  
"What?" Jenna questioned, confused.  
  
"You see," Sara explained, "You and I have switched bodies or something because you're pissed at Stu and I'm not. Jenna, you bad girl! You really shouldn't have kissed Randy in my body."  
  
Everyone sent her looks as though she was crazy and Randy muttered, "And I thought Stu was crazy."  
  
Jenna laughed then said, "I hate Stu. You've been wanting this, Sara. When I finally do what you want you accuse me of stealing your body. You never are happy!"  
  
"Why does everyone have to hate me?" Stu asked, looking to the sky for an answer.  
  
"Because you suck, Stu," Sara continued to scan Jenna for lies as she commented, "You replied just as I would have! You body thief!"  
  
Sara still had her back to Stu as she stared Jenna down with great suspicion. Jenna's eyes widened in fear as she saw it happen. She somewhat froze but still managed to whimper, "Sara..."  
  
Sara stood there then felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned around and almost immediately felt hands clamp around her throat. She let out a single strangled gasp as his hands tightened. Stu looked down at her in a way that told everyone he totally was out of his mind. He chuckled as he strangled her and said calmly, "Think of something more original then 'you suck', please. Its really getting old."  
  
Jenna screamed, "STOP HURTING HER!"  
  
Stu just tightened his grip with one hand on Sara's throat as Jenna leapt on him. With his now free hand he shoved her mid-leap causing her to fall to the ground. He returned both hands to Sara's throat, her eyes fluttering to the back of her head slightly. And he probably would have killed her right then and there if Randy hadn't stepped in and ordered, "Stop it! GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF HER RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"  
  
Stu frowned and said in an emotionless tone, "Fine! I guess I really know now who my friends are..."  
  
Randy rolled his eyes and said sort of pissed off like, "You are trying to murder my girlfriend after all."  
  
Jenna stood up slowly, backing away from Stu in fear. Stu glanced at her then Randy, sighed then took his hands away from Sara quickly causing her to collapse to the ground. Stu turned from them and stuffed his hands in his jeans' pockets as he huffed and said, "You all are so melodramatic. Take some pills already!"  
  
Stu started walking off in no particular direction, just wanting to leave. Randy stared after him and yelled, "We'll talk about this one later, pal!"  
  
Then Sara's loud gasping breaths filled his ears and he bent down to her level. He looked over to see that Jenna had done the same. Both looked down at her in worry as she rubbed her red throat. Once her breaths evened out she said with an added cough like laugh, "Man, Stu needs to get laid."  
  
Jenna and Randy laughed, relieved that Sara was okay. Sara sat up, looked at Jenna with worry as she asked, "Are you okay, Jenna?"  
  
Jenna nodded slowly and answered, "It was just a little fall. I'm okay."  
  
"You're bleeding," Randy pointed out as he eyed Jenna's blood covered elbow.  
  
Jenna looked around trying to find her bleeding part. She looked at her elbow, chuckled uneasily and muttered, "So I am."  
  
Sara stood up and the others followed suit, standing beside her. She turned to Randy and pleaded, "Please go beat up Stu."  
  
Randy thought for a moment then smiled at her and said, "Okay. I'll go and beat up my best buddy just for you."  
  
"Thank you!" Sara kissed Randy on the cheek as though to say 'Off with you'.  
  
"In case I don't survive...." Randy said dramatically as he leaned in and kissed her softly and quickly on the lips.  
  
Jenna grinned and said, "Don't worry, Randy. If you don't make it then we'll make sure the memory of movie geeks everywhere lives on."  
  
"Thank you, Jenna!" Randy said, taking a little bow. He started heading in the direction Stu had gone.  
  
Jenna and Sara looked at one another then at the leaving Randy. Jenna, rubbing her elbow, asked, "Are you sure you're alright and everything?"  
  
"Besides the whole be strangled thing today has been good," Sara answered then asked, "Now, what the fuck is up with you and Stu?"  
  
Jenna frowned sorrowfully and said, "I'll fill you and Kayleigh in in the safety of our own rooms...."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Author's note:  
  
That chapter sucked. I kinda wrote that impetuously. You know what song makes me think of the relationship between Jenna and Stu? "The Ex" by Billy Talent. Oh, GUESS WHAT?!?!?! I'm getting a SLC Punk t-shirt. So is Jenna! Aren't you oh so happy for us? I surely am.... Everyone, IM PREGNANT! No I'm not. You guys are silly! Okay, I think I will go then. GO OUT OF MY MIND THAT IS! BUHAWAHAHAHA! I'm just kidding. Or am I? 


	28. DOOMED

Stu walked into his room, slamming the door with anger behind him. He fell onto his bed, his face burying itself into his pillow. He closed his eyes, replaying his fresh actions in his head. He tried to kill Sara right then and there where anyone could have seen. He pushed Jenna to the ground.  
  
"Jenna...." He thought, knowing if there was any doubt in Jenna's mind before that he was a killer it was gone now. "She probably knows."  
  
Stu let out a loud sigh then asked out loud, "What the fuck is wrong with me?"  
  
Anger began to take over him as he punched the wall beside his bed with out even looking. Then he muttered into the pillow, "Sorry Jenna but you have to be put on the list. You'll be right next to Sara."  
  
A knock sounded but before he could even move or look up Randy stormed in, slamming the door with such force that a picture fell off the wall. Stu turned over onto his back and stared at Randy innocently, asking, "What ever is the matter, my friend?"  
  
"You tried to kill Sara!" Randy yelled.  
  
Stu shushed him then replied in an immature way, "She started it."  
  
Randy, ignoring Stu's comment snapped in a less loudly tone, "I swear if you touch her again I'll-"  
  
"You'll what?" Stu asked dangerously as he stood up from his bed and mocked, "You'll fail to kill me because I'm the killer, baby!"  
  
Randy began to feel slightly inferior to Stu but sure as hell wasn't going to show it so he glared fiercely and reminded bitterly, "I'm the killer too."  
  
"You wish," Stu snorted.  
  
Randy raised his eyebrows questioningly and asked, "You want proof?"  
  
"Yes I do," Stu said in a 'You-cant-do-shit' tone.  
  
Randy thought about it and decided he would prove Stu wrong later but now he would avenge Sara. He said in anger, "You need to treat Sara better! Also, what is wrong with you and Jenna?"  
  
"I think I'll murder Sara," Stu said simply to piss Randy off and to ignore the question.  
  
Pissing Randy off worked seeing as he began to shake with rage. He lunged at Stu, putting his hands tightly around his neck just as Stu had done to Sara. A look of worry overcame Stu's usual cocky facial expressions. He tried forcing Randy away but failed. Then, in a strangled, choked voice Stu said, "I was kidding!"  
  
Randy's grip loosened on his neck and the angry face gradually calmed. His hands dropped, he turned from Stu and said, "Don't kid about that..."  
  
"Why did you and her make up anyway? Its just a disaster waiting to happen," Stu rubbed his neck irritably.  
  
Randy grinned and replied, "Disasters are what make movies interesting."  
  
Stu rolled his eyes and muttered, "Well your movie is boring."  
  
"I'm sorry mine isn't as interesting as yours. Not everyone beats up their girlfriends and their friends'."  
  
Stu's irritability turned into anger as he snarled, "Jenna is no longer my girlfriend!"  
  
"Explain that to me," Randy ordered.  
  
"Fine! Here's the thing...." Stu began.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Sara and Jenna walked sadly to their room. Sara continued to rub her throat and Jenna stroked her elbow absently. They opened the door when they reached it and walked in slowly, closing the door depressedly. Kayleigh, sitting on her bed, jumped up and asked, "What happened?"  
  
"What makes you think something happened?" Jenna asked in a sad tone.  
  
"The fact that you two are all depressed," Kayleigh replied then asked, "What happened that's making you all sad?"  
  
Sara shrugged and said in a lofty tone, "I was almost killed."  
  
"What?!" Kayleigh exclaimed, "And I missed it? Who tried to kill you?"  
  
"Stu," Jenna answered simply.  
  
Kayleigh nodded understandingly as she asked, "What did you do now, Sara?"  
  
"Nothing!" Sara defended.  
  
"Yeah, Stu is just crazy," Jenna said distantly.  
  
Both Kayleigh and Sara stared at Jenna expectantly. Then Sara commanded, "Tell me about what happened with you and Stu!"  
  
"Fine! Here's the thing...." Jenna began.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Randy stared at Stu in horror as he asked, "So you think Jenna knows about us being killers?"  
  
"She's a smart girl. I'm positive she knows," Stu answered sadly.  
  
Randy sighed and asked, "What the fuck are we going to do?"  
  
"I don't know," Stu answered in a distant tone.  
  
"Are we going to have to kill her?" Randy asked.  
  
Stu answered in annoyance, "I don't know, Randy!"  
  
Randy gasped as he asked, "Do you think she told Sara?"  
  
Stu snapped, "I honestly don't know!"  
  
"Do you think Sara will hate me?" Randy asked nervously, his hands fidgeting crazily.  
  
"I DONT KNOW!" Stu yelled then added quietly, "Nor do I care."  
  
Randy shut his mouth then opened it again and asked annoyingly, "Are you gonna learn to keep your temper in check, man?"  
  
This question Stu did answer in all seriousness, "I hope so! Another attempt to kill your girlfriend and I'm off to prison."  
  
"One more attempt to kill my girlfriend and I'll kill you," Randy threatened.  
  
Stu laughed, took in Randy's serious tone and laughed even harder. The laughter quickly stopped as Stu asked, "Are you threatening me?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's what the kids call it nowadays," Randy nodded fiercely.  
  
"Big words!" Stu teased, "You are such a pansy!"  
  
"Fine! I'll go and prove who is a pansy!" Randy stomped over to the door and glared at Stu.  
  
Stu snorted and said, "It'll still be you no matter what you fail to do."  
  
"Trust me, I won't fail!" Randy insisted as he walked out of the room, leaving the door wide open.  
  
Stu remained in deep contemplation, thinking about Jenna and ignoring the opened door. It wasn't until he stopped thinking about her that he headed toward the door. Marjory belated, He yelled, "Close the door much?"  
  
That was when someone appeared in the open doorway causing Stu to jump out of surprise. The surprise immediately turned to loathing as Shannon the slut entered his room, pushing him aside. He looked around in a confused way and asked in a tone to match, "What the fuck are you doing?"  
  
"I just came to see you, Stu," Shannon smirked confidently.  
  
"Well," He responded, staring at the opened door waiting for her to leave through it, "I don't want to see you!"  
  
"Awww," She lied, "Your words hurt me, baby."  
  
Stu cringed and ordered sternly, "Don't call me 'baby'! Its just wrong!"  
  
She glanced around the room then noticed the still open door. She raised an eyebrow and said, "You can close the door, you know!"  
  
"Why?" Stu asked, "Your just leaving anyway."  
  
"What?" Shannon questioned, "You mean you honestly don't want to do anything?"  
  
Stu laughed unsurely then asked, "What are you talking about?"  
  
She rolled her eyes and answered, "I thought guys like you liked girls. Apparently, I was wrong."  
  
"I do like girls. I just don't really want to catch anything," Stu insisted, nodding toward the door.  
  
"I am not a whore!" She faked offensiveness.  
  
He laughed loudly, "I didn't call you a whore. I guess someone has a guilty conscience."  
  
"Shut up! I don't like you," She said coldly.  
  
"Then leave!"  
  
She walked to the door slowly and glared at him. Before she left she said, "Have fun with your freak girlfriend." (Authors note: Hahahaha, Jenna I just called you a freak. Am I now....DOOMED?)  
  
"I will!" Stu nodded happily, glad she was leaving.  
  
She walked out, sending him cold stares. Stu closed the door and locked it. Doing so he thought, "God, that was strange...."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"So yeah, Stu knows I at least stole the yearbook," Jenna stated in a detached tone.  
  
Kayleigh looked around in frantic paranoia. She asked, "You don't think he'll try and kill me too? I'm too young to die!"  
  
"He just tried to kill me because I'm a bitch. No need for you to worry," Sara smiled and strangely bopped her head around. Then she added dramatically, "Your not...DOOMED!"  
  
"DOOMED!" Jenna echoed with a laugh.  
  
"Shut up, Jesus!" Sara laughed as well.  
  
"Or what? I'll be....DOOMED!?" Jenna asked.  
  
"Oooh.....DOOMED!" Kayleigh echoed.  
  
"I think I'll go see Randy later and see if he is...." Sara began, seriously.  
  
"To see if he is.... DOOMED!?" Kayleigh inquired, cackling insanely.  
  
"DOOMED!" Jenna started thinking and laughing then stopped and added, "I just realized Randy's last name! Its Doom so that means he's...DOOMED!"  
  
"DOOMED!" Kayleigh teased, laughing at Sara's fake pout.  
  
Sara glared and muttered, "Go to hell!"  
  
Kayleigh gasped falsely, looked from Sara to Jenna with widened eyes. She pretended to be shocked as she said, "Sara, you can't talk to Jesus like that! Or else your...."  
  
"DOOMED!" Jenna and Kayleigh boomed in unison.  
  
Sara rolled her eyes and asked, "What is wrong with you both?"  
  
"I'm drunk," Kayleigh answered.  
  
Jenna shrugged and said, "I don't have an excuse. Um... Near death experiences excite me."  
  
"Oh," Sara shrugged, "Then I guess with Stu around you'll get excited a lot."  
  
"Why would Stu kill her?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
Jenna stopped laughing and answered, "We already covered this! He is gonna kill me because I know about him being Stu Macher rather than Stu Killings..."  
  
Sara snorted, "He is such a dumbass. What serial killer changes his last name to 'Killings'?"  
  
"Yeah.... He now is...DOOMED!" Kayleigh said, cracking up with laughter.  
  
Neither Jenna or Sara laughed. They just blinked excessively then Jenna said, "We've moved past that, Kayleigh."  
  
"Oh," Kayleigh blushed slightly then added with an insane laugh, "DOOMED!"  
  
Sara chuckled then asked, "So I guess we all are positive Stu is the killer, right?"  
  
"Yeah, I guess," Kayleigh shrugged.  
  
Jenna fell silent causing Sara to stare at her in anticipation. Finally Jenna answered, "I know he is the killer."  
  
"Haha, Stu sucks!" Sara clapped happily.  
  
"Where does Randy stand?" Jenna asked.  
  
Kayleigh yawned and commented, "They are best friends and if one is a killer the other will be a crazy conformist and do the same."  
  
Sara shook her head violently and said, "Randy Doom or Randy Meeks or whatever the fuck his name is is not a conformist! A killer, probably. But he is not Stu's lap dog!"  
  
"DOOMED!" Jenna laughed suddenly.  
  
Kayleigh patted her on the head and teased, "Jesus, we're already past that. Move on!"  
  
"DOOMED!" Jenna repeated just for the sake of repeating it.  
  
Sara looked down at her black nails and asked sorrowfully, "Do you think Randy will try and kill me too?"  
  
"Why do you ask?" Jenna wondered.  
  
Sara shrugged, "Killing me might become some crazy cool fad..."  
  
"Probably," Kayleigh replied with a cheerful nod.  
  
"Thanks," Sara muttered.  
  
Jenna looked at Sara and said, "Your crazy!"  
  
"I'm crazy?" Sara inquired then teased, "That means nothing from a chick who digs hobbits with hairy feet! You're a nut!"  
  
Kayleigh looked at both of them, herself cracking up as she said, "DOOMED!"  
  
"You and your paranoia are insane!" Jenna insisted then defended, "Hobbits are the shit! That's more then you can say about elves!"  
  
Sara crossed her arms over her chest and pointed out, "I'm a blonde! I'm bound to die."  
  
Kayleigh grinned sheepishly then said, "Not if your shagging the killer!"  
  
"'Shagging'?" Jenna and Sara repeated questioningly, Sara confused.  
  
"You've seen one to many Mike Myers films..." Jenna commented.  
  
"I'm not that kind of girl! No shagging until after the movie!" Sara replied.  
  
"Or you're DOOMED!" Kayleigh dramatized.  
  
"You know what? Guys suck! Stu can and probably will go to hell. Before he murders us lets go cry at Disney films," Jenna said.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Authors note:  
  
Okay, hello everyone! A lot of the stuff in this chapter only Jenna will get. I'll explain them now:  
  
The DOOMED thing: Ever seen that one FedEx commercial? The one where they keep saying DOOMED? That is what made this chapter what it is.  
  
The calling Jenna Jesus thing: Me and her took a quiz thing and her results were Jesus. I got Simon because Jesus hates me... Hahah, sorry. I'm insane.  
  
Other than that, I guess you guys got it all. Everyone, I love you all! Now go to hell! Okay... Sorry! I have Tourettes so PISS OFF! Sorry, Drop Dead Fred wrote that, I swear!  
  
Now I shall leave you a quote I just thought of, currently viewable in Jenna's Eastwick Fic:  
  
"Jesus stole my tennis shoes!" 


	29. In Need Of Professional Help

Authors note:  
  
Okay, I thought we all need a little pointless random things seeing as its been plot after plot here. DOWN WITH SERIOUSNESS! So this chapter, for the most part is just the pointlessness we all need. I love this chapter! It's so random and awesome!  
  
I love you all so keep on trucking!  
  
Sara the handsome man!  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Jenna, Kayleigh and Sara sat around the television set watching the end credits for The Little Mermaid. Sara stretched her arms up over her head. Jenna looked at her boredly and asked, "What do you want to do next?"  
  
"Lets vandalize something!" Kayleigh suggested enthusiastically.  
  
"YES!!" Jenna and Sara agreed excitedly.  
  
"Shame on you, Jesus!" Kayleigh shook a finger at Jenna in a 'shame on you' sort of way.  
  
Sara looked at them in amusement and said, "No! Jesus is exempt from shame! She is special!"  
  
"Special ed!" Jenna added with a laugh. When no one else joined in she looked down and said defeatedly, "Not funny..."  
  
"But anyway..." Kayleigh said, sending Jenna unsure looks, "I say we attack people with plastic sporks."  
  
Jenna nodded then suggested, "How about we dump pigs blood on the homicidal teen as she gets her one shining moment at the prom."  
  
"Or we could spray paint things," Sara suggested dully with a shrug of her shoulders.  
  
"Ooh, aren't we rebellious!" Jenna waved her hands around in mockery.  
  
"I think we should do things to people that are highly ineffective. That's always fun to do," Kayleigh thought out loud.  
  
"Or we can find a genie who lives in a coke can and we can capture her giving us threw wishes. I of course would firstly wish Stu would drop dead. Then I would wish for all the Jolt cola in the world. Then I would wish for things to exactly the same as they are but for us to go back before I wished so I could get more wishes," Sara rambled.  
  
Jenna blinked blankly and asked, "Why destroy Stu firstly?"  
  
Sara shrugged and answered, "I don't like him. He should burn in hell and burn fast!"  
  
"Why, Jenna?" Kayleigh asked, "Do you love Stu after all?"  
  
"NO!" Jenna answered instantly, "He is a fucking nut!"  
  
Kayleigh was still wondering things but decided to let it go with a little, "Okay then...."  
  
"Whatever. Lets go wreak havoc before I become a fucking nut," Sara said as she stood up from the ground.  
  
"Too late, you already are," Jenna laughed crazily.  
  
"DOOMED!" Kayleigh shrieked for no reason really.  
  
Sara cracked her knuckles and said, "Everyone loves crazy people! Now lets go out in the world and become loved!"  
  
"Don't we have classes?" Jenna asked, boredly as she stood up beside Sara.  
  
Kayleigh stood as well and said wrathfully, "Damn education!"  
  
"You know what? I was just thinking...." Sara began, a grin on her face.  
  
Jenna cut in, talking so quickly she drooled on herself, "We should have a hand shake thing!"  
  
"Damn you Jesus! Stop reading my mind," Sara yelled in fake anger.  
  
Kayleigh stroked her chin as though she was in deep contemplation. She glanced at Sara then Jenna who now was wiping the drool off her own chin. Kayleigh clapped her hands together causing her comrades to jump slightly. She said, "We can just put our fists together and yell so people think we're insane 'Go, Go Power Rangers!'"  
  
"YES!" Sara and Jenna agreed.  
  
Kayleigh put her clenched fist in the area between her friends. Sara slowly, unsurely did the same. Jenna smiled at them innocently as she bashed her fist into theirs. Sara laughed then yelled at the top of her lungs, "GO, GO POWER RANGERS!!!"  
  
Jenna and Kayleigh exchanged looks then Kayleigh shook her head and said, "We have to say it together."  
  
"NO!" Jenna shrieked, "Anything but unison!"  
  
With Sara's free hand she shook Jenna slightly, saying, "Its okay! If we can survive a random attack from Stu we can yell in unison."  
  
"Okay, if you say so..." Jenna said, grinning wider.  
  
"Okay, on the count of three we say it! 1.... 2....." Kayleigh laughed then started counting.  
  
Before Kayleigh reached three Jenna yelled out, "SHAGGY PACKAGE!!!!"  
  
Sara grinned and yelled, "I'M A HANDSOME MAN!"  
  
"Awwww.... What the hell do I have to lose?" Kayleigh reasoned then yelled, "SATAN FOR PRESIDENT!"  
  
They laughed then Sara said, "Apparently Stu isn't the only one who is insane."  
  
"Well, lets go prove to society that not only do we not contribute to anything but we vandalize and terrify!" Kayleigh said, bouncing toward the door.  
  
Jenna grabbed random things and stuffed them in her pockets. She sighed and laughed then agreed, "Lets do exactly that!"  
  
Kayleigh opened the door and started walking out, Jenna following closely behind her. Sara looked around the room menacingly, in search of a tool to scare people. A light bulb lit up in her mind and she dashed to her bed. She looked around in a paranoid way then pulled a shoebox out from under her bed. She grabbed something out from the box and hid them quickly in the pocket of her black hooded sweatshirt. Sara walked out of the room, closing the door securely.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Randy walked back to his room slowly, deep in thought. He wondered who he could kill in order to prove Stu wrong, to prove that he too was the killer. When he finally walked in his room he was highly disappointed when he saw Brock there. Brock who laid on his own bed with his arms behind his head, supporting it watched Randy carefully. Of course Brock didn't say 'Hey Randy! Good to see you! How is the family?' Instead he asked cockily, "How is my lady friend Sara?"  
  
Randy glared at Brock with complete hatred. He tried to keep his voice calm and even but ended up doing exactly the opposite. In a voice that was furious and uneven he snapped, "DROP DEAD!"  
  
"Are you angry with me, buddy?" Brock asked, sitting up in his bed.  
  
"Why the fuck did you kiss Sara?" Randy asked angrily.  
  
Brock shrugged and answered, "Oh, I did it for you! I wanted to see if she was worthy of your affection so therefore I kissed her. If she was worthy she wouldn't have kissed me! I say you end things with her and find someone else."  
  
"What?" Randy inquired, "Why the fuck should I end things with Sara?"  
  
"Because she's a whore," Brock answered instinctively.  
  
Randy began to think. He considered his options then decided he had to do what he had to do. He thought, 'Brock has got to go...'  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Kayleigh and Jenna walked down the hallway, side by side. Sara skipped behind them. Jenna without even looking at her asked Sara, "Why are you skipping? Who gave you sugar?"  
  
"No one, I swear!" Sara stopped skipping and started walking beside them.  
  
Kayleigh shrugged and asked, "What mischief do you want to do first?"  
  
"Kill Stu!" Sara suggested instantly.  
  
Jenna looked down to the ground and said, "Sara, how about just for fun you tell us exactly why you hate Stu."  
  
"He's a jerk! He also tried to kill me incase you forgot. He is a.....BASTARD!!!" Sara started speaking calmly then yelled in fury. The noise she was making caused a door they were walking past to open, a brunette girl stared out glaring at them.  
  
The brunette said in a tired, annoyed voice, "Shut the fuck up! I'm trying to sleep here!"  
  
"DROP DEAD!" Sara shrieked back, stopping dead in her tracks.  
  
Jenna stopped as well, eyeing the brunette dangerously. After looking the girl over Jenna asked, "Your in our Film class, right?"  
  
The girl squinted at them then smirked an 'I'm-a-bitch' smile as she said, "Oh yeah! You-" She pointed at Sara "-are the chick who did the walk of shame today with that loser, Randy!"  
  
"You slept with Randy?" Kayleigh asked Sara.  
  
Sara looked at her sheepishly then whispered, "I'll explain later Kayleigh, don't worry!"  
  
Jenna who didn't take her eyes off the brunette asked coldly, "What is your name?"  
  
"Danielle, why?" The girl answered reluctantly.  
  
"Well Danielle.... I thought you should know something. Jesus hates you!" Jenna answered, her menacing eyes widening as though to fill Danielle with terror. It kind of worked to some extent.  
  
"Go to hell, sluts!" Danielle quickly closed the door and they could hear the lock click.  
  
Kayleigh looked from the door to her friends in confusion. She asked, "How am I a slut?"  
  
"Lets bother her," Jenna suggested.  
  
"Yes!" Sara agreed. She stomped over to where the door was at arm length. She started spitting on the door.  
  
Jenna and Kayleigh exchanged skeptical looks then moved to Sara's side. Kayleigh tapped on Sara's head and asked, "Why are you spitting on her door?"  
  
"I think in Greece when you spit on people and their doors or something you're cursing them," Sara answered, continuing to spit on the door.  
  
"Really?" Jenna questioned. Sara nodded and Jenna started spitting on the door too.  
  
"You guys! Stop!" Kayleigh ordered. They both stopped mid-spit and looked at her as she continued to say, "The spit on people for good luck in Greece, I think."  
  
"You think? I think I'm right!" Sara started spitting on the door again.  
  
"Yeah! Sara could be right," Jenna spit too.  
  
Kayleigh sighed exasperatedly then muttered, "If you can't beat them to death, join them!"  
  
As soon as Kayleigh too started spitting on the now 'cursed' door it swung open and someone appeared in front of their target. Slow to react they all got one final spit on her. It wasn't until Danielle screamed that they looked at her angry face. Kayleigh chuckled nervously and said, "Look at the time! We have to take Sara in for her Rabies shot."  
  
"That's right! We all need them! In case you didn't know, Rabies causes people to spit on other people's doors," Jenna went along, adding an overly innocent grin.  
  
Jenna and Kayleigh grabbed one of Sara's arms each and started dragging her away. Sara stuck her tongue out at Danielle and yelled after her, "You have Rabies too now! So in your face!"  
  
They continued to drag her away until they turned a corner. Then they both let go causing her to fall to the ground. Sara whimpered in pain then stood up, saying, "Thanks for the warning!"  
  
"No problem," Kayleigh shrugged modestly.  
  
Jenna grinned and commented, "We are insane!"  
  
"Speak for yourself, Jesus," Sara crossed her arms over her chest.  
  
"Lets return to our evil doings!" Kayleigh said, her friends nodding in agreement.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Randy moved over to his bed. He reached down and grabbed what he was looking for by its handle. When he turned and looked back at Brock he hid his freshly retrieved item behind his back. Randy asked, "Brock, when you die what do you want to be known for?"  
  
"What kind of question is that?" asked Brock, thinking over the question.  
  
"Its a good question. Now answer it," Randy said calmly.  
  
"I guess I want to be known as the hot dude from the Real World," He shrugged then smirked as he added, "And to be known for kissing your girl."  
  
Randy's eye oddly twitched as he asked calmly, "Brock, can you stand up for a minute?"  
  
"Why?" Brock asked in suspicion.  
  
"I want you to show me a really cool dance move," Randy lied as he clenched onto the knife behind him.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"Where are we going?" Kayleigh asked as she followed Sara who followed Jenna.  
  
"You'll see," Jenna grinned mischievously as she reached in her pants pockets and pulled out a pack of Juicy Fruit gum. She took three pieces out of the pack and put it back in her pocket. She held onto a piece and handed two back to Sara with out stopping. She ordered, "Take one and pass it back!"  
  
Sara did as she was told and handed the third piece back to Kayleigh. All three started chewing the gum and Sara asked, "What is with the gum?"  
  
Jenna glanced back at her and answered, "We're going to spit gum in people's hair!"  
  
"What's with all the spitting today?" Kayleigh questioned.  
  
Sara shrugged in answer to Kayleigh's question then asked, "Jesus, who is our victim?"  
  
"Shannon!" Jenna answered.  
  
Sara stopped walking abruptly and Kayleigh collided into her. Jenna, hearing only her own footsteps walking stopped, turned and looked at Sara and Kayleigh. She raised her eyebrows and asked, "Is there a problem?"  
  
"Not with me! Its all-" Kayleigh pointed at Sara. Sara looked down at the tiled floor.  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and asked, "What's wrong Sara?"  
  
"Nothing," Sara muttered, not looking up.  
  
"Cheer up, Sara!" Kayleigh said cheerfully, "We'll make sure you don't kill anyone yet!"  
  
Sara nodded, looked up and smiled. She said softly, the roughness usually in her voice gone, "If you guys see me try to be subtle and sly just remember that I'm probably up to no good."  
  
"Oh okay! And if we see you doing the obvious we'll know you really aren't doing evil. We won't worry if we see you sharpening a machete or forcing toxins down Shannon's throat," Jenna smiled darkly, envisioning her blonde friend trying to get her blonde foe to drink poison. She let out a loud laugh.  
  
Sara gave Jenna two thumbs up and said, "Groovy plan!"  
  
"So we're going to spit gum in her hair as payback?" Kayleigh asked, making sure that's what they were doing.  
  
"Well, yes!" Jenna simply answered.  
  
"Oh! Cool! Can we cut her hair too?" Kayleigh asked excitedly.  
  
Jenna started walking again and answered, "Sure."  
  
~*~*~  
  
"You want me to show you some cool dance moves?" Brock repeated, confused.  
  
Randy nodded slowly causing Brock to jump off the bad and stand in front of him. Brock smirked and asked, "What do you want me to show you?"  
  
"Hmmmm...." Randy pretended to think about it. He pointed behind Brock and gasped, inquiring, "What's that?"  
  
"What's what?" Brock turned around, looking all over for something suspicious.  
  
This was Randy's moment, his perfect moment. He took his perfect moment and took it quickly. Swiftly he took the knife he hid behind his back and moved it centimeters away from Brock's throat. Randy hesitated then pulled the blade into Brock's throat, pulling it across and off. Randy held the bloody knife in his hand shakily. It took a moment for Brock's body to collapse to the ground. Randy sighed and let go of the knife thinking, 'That was easy.'  
  
The knife fell with a thud just as Brock's body had done. Randy thought of what he just had done and muttered, "Fuck!"  
  
He quickly backed away from the body until he bumped into the door. He jumped around and relaxed slightly. He shook his head and whispered to himself, "I hate to have to do this but it needs to be done...'  
  
Randy opened the door, crept out then closed it quickly. He grabbed his key out of his pocket and locked his door. He looked around to see if anyone was watching and no one was. He returned the key to his pocket and started heading in the direction of Stu's room.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"You knock!" Sara insisted to Kayleigh as they stood outside Shannon's room.  
  
"No, you knock!" Kayleigh replied, stuffing her hands in her pockets.  
  
Sara got ready to insist that Kayleigh knock again but Jenna knocked on the door before she could. Jenna rolled her eyes and asked, "Was that so hard?"  
  
"More than you know," Sara answered.  
  
The door swung open and Shannon entered the picture. Kayleigh snickered when she noticed Shannon's failed attempts to cover up her newly gain wounds from the party with makeup. Shannon glared at Kayleigh then Jenna then finally settled her angry looks on Sara. Shannon asked, "What do you freaks want?"  
  
"Exactly that!" Kayleigh answered smugly, "We're being freaks."  
  
"Go be freaks else where than, you freaks!" Shannon tried shutting the door on them but Jenna quickly put her foot in the way. The door bounced off her foot causing Shannon to look down and whined, "What do you want?"  
  
"We are here to go crazy!" Jenna said insanely, pushing the door open. Jenna walked in, pushing past Shannon. Sara walked past her, avoiding everyone's gaze. Kayleigh hissed at Shannon and bounced past her.  
  
Shannon closed her door and glared at them all. She asked, fear hinging on her voice, "Why are you going crazy here?"  
  
"Because your our most favorite person!" Kayleigh answered sarcastically.  
  
Shannon shook slightly and responded fearfully, "Are you going to try and hurt me again? If you are I'm ready! I know some super bad moves!"  
  
Jenna moved all up in Shannon's face and said menacingly, "Boo!"  
  
Shannon flinched and Jenna backed away. Kayleigh laughed and mocked, "Aren't you fearless!"  
  
"Leave me alone!" Shannon ordered.  
  
"NEVER!!!" Kayleigh yelled dramatically moving closer to Shannon. When Kayleigh was close enough to be an arms length away.  
  
"Back off!" Shannon shrieked in fear.  
  
"We don't have to!" Jenna joined Kayleigh and moved closer to Shannon.  
  
Shannon decided to play tough as she asked, "Who do you think you are?"  
  
"Well, I personally am Alanis Morissette's daughter. She is my daddy!" Jenna answered looking at her black fingernails with false interest.  
  
Kayleigh laughed then shrugged and answered, "I'm Satan on my good days."  
  
Jenna reached in her mouth and pulled out her gum. She placed it on top Shannon's head and smashed it in there. Their bleached blonde foe's eyes widened in terror and shock as she yelled, "LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
  
"DROP DEAD!" Sara yelled back as she moved beside Jenna.  
  
Kayleigh looked at Sara and said, "I was worried about you! I thought you went mute or something."  
  
"No, I was just taking a nap..." Sara lied, pulling her gum out of her mouth and doing as Jenna and Kayleigh had done.  
  
Shannon shrieked and whimpered as she stroked her gum filled hair sorrowfully. She glared at them and yelled, "LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!!"  
  
"I think you need a hair cut," Jenna commented.  
  
"YES!!" Kayleigh and Sara agreed.  
  
Shannon shook her head furiously, not really sure what was to come. Sara reached in her hoody and pulled out one of the things she had retrieved from under her bed.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Author's note:  
  
Okay, I lied, there is some plotness in this chapter! I liked it though. I intended it to be longer but I think I'll end it there. More chapters are soon to come, I swear. You all rock! This was boring so don't hate me! 


	30. The Scream Queens

Randy knocked on the door slowly, sighing loudly. Soon the door creaked open a crack and half of Stu's face peered out at him. Stu asked boredly, "What do you want, loser?"  
  
"Could you be anymore paranoid?" Randy questioned, referring to Stu's peeking out the door all shifty eyed paranoid actions. Randy pushed the door open the rest of the way causing Stu to turn from him and stalk back to his bed.  
  
Stu collapsed flat on his bed tiredly. He asked in a whiningly annoyed tone, "What do you want, dork?"  
  
Randy closed the door securely, looked up at Stu with pride and said with a proud tone, "I killed someone! I'm the killer!"  
  
"Who?" Stu sat up with great interest.  
  
Randy smiled wickedly and answered, "Brock!"  
  
"What?" Stu's tone was now in a mixture of disbelief and frustration.  
  
His comrade's overly confident tone and mannerisms stopped and were replaced with a confused, venerable inquirement of, "What's wrong?"  
  
"You killed your roommate! If Sara, Jenna and Kayleigh didn't know already they sure as hell know now that you're the killer!" Stu answered, rolling his eyes.  
  
"That's right!" Randy's confidence returned, "I am the killer!"  
  
Stu rolled his eyes again and asked, his tired and bored voice to be heard, "Is that all you came here for? To brag?"  
  
"Not exactly...." Randy looked to the ground in shame and muttered just loud enough so Stu heard, "I need your help!"  
  
"Disposal of the body, right?" Stu asked trying to pretend to be uninterested though excitement hinged its way into his question.  
  
Still ashamed to have to ask, he muttered, "Yeah...."  
  
"Then lets get to it!" Stu stood up.  
  
"Okay!" Randy was so sure Stu would mock him so now found himself to be surprised at Stu's immediate agreement.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Kayleigh peeked out the door, saw that the halls were empty and whispered, "Okay! Let's go!"  
  
She crept out of the room followed by Jenna then Sara. Sara looked back into the room with a menacing grin and said while laughing, "Goodbye Shannon!"  
  
"FOREVER!!" Jenna yelled dramatically, snickering.  
  
"What was the point in sneaking out if your gonna yell and draw attention to us?" Kayleigh wondered.  
  
Jenna smiled, "I feel so alive! Lets continue our mischief!"  
  
"We should! Jesus, good plan!" Kayleigh agreed, excited.  
  
"What do you want to do?" Sara asked, closing the door to Shannon's room quickly.  
  
(Authors note: Let me guess, you want to see what we did to Shannon? Guess what, I think I'll save that for later! You'll see what it is! Its a total scream! Muhawaha...)  
  
"Mischief," Jenna answered simply with a shrug.  
  
Kayleigh thought then suggested, "Let's go spray paint something!"  
  
"Do we even have spray paint?" Jenna asked.  
  
"Yeah..." Sara reached in her hoodies' pocket and pulled out (of the many things in there) a thing of red spray paint. Jenna and Kayleigh sent her curious looks and she replied their looks defensively, "What? You said we were going to vandalize stuff! What is vandalism without spray paint?"  
  
Kayleigh sent Sara two thumbs up and said, "Your right! Let's paint peoples doors!"  
  
"YES!!" Jenna agreed excitedly as she snatched the spray paint out of Sara's hands and turned to Shannon's door with it. She ripped the lid off of it and tossed it behind her to the ground and started painting.  
  
Kayleigh bent down, picked up the lid and asked, "What are you going to put?"  
  
"You'll see!" Jenna said with an evil laugh.  
  
Sara grabbed the paint cap from Kayleigh and commented teasingly, "Knowing Jenna she'll probably put Stu's name with a heart around in."  
  
"Guess again!" Jenna said as the sound of spray paint ceased.  
  
She backed away from the door so her friend's could see. Now in the middle of the door the word 'Redrum' was written across in a fairly neat way. They all grinned wickedly and Kayleigh muttered, "Let the mischief really begin!"  
  
"What? Spitting on doors and teaching whores a lesson isn't good enough for you?" Sara wondered.  
  
"Poor Shannon! God bless her soul!" Jenna said sarcastically.  
  
"Hmmm...." Kayleigh said all shifty eyed. Then she yelled, "YOINK!"  
  
She grabbed the spray paint out of Jenna's hands and started running ahead of them, laughing madly. Jenna and Sara exchanged amused looks and Jenna said, "I guess we should chase after yelling random things...."  
  
"Agreed!" Sara started chasing Kayleigh down then yelled, "ITS HIP TO BE SQUARE!! NERDS FOREVER!"  
  
Jenna blinked blankly at Sara's statement, shrugged then ran after her yelling, "KIDNAP MR. SANDY CLAWS!!!!"  
  
Sara stopped once she noticed Kayleigh had already started spray-painting a door. Jenna stopped too and asked, "Who's door is this?"  
  
Kayleigh shrugged and answered as she continued to write something, "How the hell should I know? I'm not psychic!"  
  
"Then why this door?" Jenna asked, eyeing the door with wonder.  
  
"It looked boring so I'm making it look cool!" Kayleigh answered distractedly, still writing.  
  
Sara laughed and said, "I bet I know what your writing!"  
  
Kayleigh stopped painting and backed away to admire her work. Jenna looked at the door, laughed and read out loud, "'The Scream Queens strike again!'"  
  
"I knew it!" Sara squealed, happy as hell to read those words again. All three of them exchanged the same menacing proud looks.  
  
~*~*~Flashback~*~*~ (A/N: Yep! I finally am writing a flashback of us to explain what Kayleigh wrote.)  
  
The two of them walked side by side down the empty hallways of their high school. Sara's golden blonde hair bounced in curls with each step she took. She watched her hair with hate as she said to her friend, "Remind me to straighten my hair after this whole thing ends."  
  
"We have more important things to do then get your hair done!" Jenna replied boredly as idly she eyed her own brown hair that fell in her face. She brushed her hair away and sighed loudly.  
  
Sara looked down at her t-shirt with the face of Stevo from one of her favorite films SLC Punk on it and smiled dreamily. Noticing what Sara was doing Jenna glanced down at her favorite Thirteen Ghosts t-shirt and said suddenly, "Sara! We should so rape our shirts!"  
  
They both noticed that the classroom they passed had its door wide open and the teacher, Mr. Phillips silently stared at them, wide eyed. Both girls started laughing after Sara glared at him and said, "Child molesting is bad!"  
  
He quickly looked away and the girls continued walking down the hall. Sara barely glanced at Jenna and asked, "Why do you think we're being called to the office?"  
  
"Think about it, Snoopy!" Jenna rolled her eyes at her friends ignorance, "It's that time of the month!"  
  
Silence fell for a moment then they both burst in fits of laughter. Jenna blushed only slightly and muttered, "You know what I mean!"  
  
"Of course," Sara shrugged and smiled in amusement.  
  
Jenna suddenly stopped walking as they stood in front of the glass door that said in black print 'School Office'. Sara opened the door and held it as Jenna entered first. She followed close behind and whispered, "Act cool."  
  
Jenna nodded and rolled her eyes as she moved to the front desk that a senior stood behind. She had light blonde hair tied back in a ponytail and wore all pink including makeup. Jenna cringed at the pinkness and greeted in an overly innocent way, "Hello Bertha!"  
  
"Freak..." The girl, Bertha said in disgust as she glanced at Jenna and Sara and the blackness they both wore.  
  
Sara forced a cough then said quickly but clearly enough, "Bitchy Bertha!" She added another cough.  
  
Jenna looked around the office thoroughly then asked distractedly, "Hey, where is everyone?"  
  
"There is a meeting, if you must know!" Bertha answered coldly, sending Sara the angriest of stares.  
  
Sara looked pleased then asked evilly, "So no one will here your screams?"  
  
Jenna started moving away from them, off to the side. She watched all the doors carefully as she moved quickly to the filing cabinets located beyond the desk and next to the door with the plaque that read 'Guidance Councilor' on it. As she touched the handle on the center drawer of the metal cabinets she heard Bertha ask, "What the hell are you doing?"  
  
"Ooh! You said 'hell'! I bet your mommy is going to make you eat soap for that one!" Sara mocked, glancing from Jenna to Bertha.  
  
Jenna ignored Bertha and opened the drawer and started looking for their names. Bertha just glared at Sara with complete hatred as she spat, "Your a fucking freak!"  
  
"Ooh! You said 'fucking'!" Sara taunted, enjoying herself. "Not only are you eating soap tonight but you also won a one way trip to hell! Congratulations!"  
  
Bertha tried thinking up a clever comeback then widened her eyes. She said as she remembered, "Your mom is here to take you two home."  
  
"Goody!" Jenna said, closing the drawer with two folders in hand.  
  
"Nice talking to you as always, Bertha!" Sara said sarcastically as Jenna moved next to her.  
  
As Sara walked to the office door Jenna smiled sweetly at Bertha and said darkly, "If you tell anyone of this I'll kill you in your sleep!"  
  
Sara left the office and Jenna followed.  
  
~*~*~  
  
"I remember Bertha!" Sara said suddenly causing Kayleigh to raise her eyebrows in confusion as though to ask 'Who the fuck is Berth?'  
  
Jenna answered Kayleigh's unspoken question, "Bertha is just another victim of the Scream Queens!"  
  
"Interesting...." Kayleigh muttered, not really caring.  
  
~*~*~Flashback~*~*~ (A/N: Okay, This time I honestly will explain the Scream Queens thing!)  
  
The both of them ran out of the building, glaring at the large sign at the entrance that read 'Meadow Brooks High School.' Jenna murmured darkly, "Damn public school system."  
  
Sara glanced around the parking lot as they entered it, searching for the familiar car. As they stepped onto the asphalt and off the sidewalk the familiar orange-red '69 camaro sped toward them. Both girls laughed as the car screeched to a stop about a foot away from them. The driver's door opened and Kayleigh stepped out of the car. She looked at them both then said in amusement, "Ah! It's the children of the corn!"  
  
"Oh, hello there 'mother'!" Sara greeted, emphasizing the word mother and adding little finger quotations around it.  
  
"Hello child of the corn #2!" Kayleigh waved to Sara.  
  
"Greetings and salutations!" Jenna said distractedly as she eyed the car hungrily.  
  
"Hello child of the corn #1!" Kayleigh waved then noticed Jenna's looks towards the car and said sternly, "Your not driving!"  
  
"Awww..." Jenna pouted and inquired, "Why the hell cant I?"  
  
"Because your bound to run down the elderly, Child of the corn #1!" Kayleigh answered. She glanced at Sara to see her looking at the car mischievously and said quickly, "Same to you! No one but me drives."  
  
Jenna slowly crept over to the passenger side of the car. Slowly she moved her hands to the front passenger seat's handle. Sara noticed this and Jenna noticed that she noticed and yelled, "I call shotgun!"  
  
"Damn it!" Sara snapped her fingers and started heading toward the backseat as Jenna opened the door to her seat, sticking her tongue out at Sara as she passed.  
  
Sara dived into the back seat and slammed her door just as her comrades had done. She sat up and glanced between the two and commented, "I see you stole your daddy's car again."  
  
"Pretty much, corn child two!" Kayleigh answered as she turned the key in the ignition, starting the car.  
  
"And where the fuck did you steal that trench coat from?" Jenna asked as she looked at the black trench coat Kayleigh wore.  
  
They started driving off at high speed as Kayleigh answered with a chuckle, "Your mom!"  
  
"Zoinks! That's original," Sara commented sarcastically.  
  
Jenna sent the school one last glare as the sped out of the parking lot and away from the school. Jenna sighed, relieved that she was free for the day. She then said, "Remind me again why we even go to school when you just kidnap us, Kayleigh."  
  
"Because," Sara answered, "It's a lot funnier this way!"  
  
"Zoinks! Good answer!" Kayleigh teased.  
  
"What movies are we watching on our lovely movie day?" Jenna asked, glancing from Kayleigh then back at Sara.  
  
"Drop Dead Fred for sure!" Sara suggested.  
  
Jenna nodded and replied happily, "Fuck yes!"  
  
"I want to do something evil!" Kayleigh laughed menacingly.  
  
Sara raised her eyebrows and asked, "Like satanic evil?"  
  
"Or like having an affair with a priest evil?" Jenna wondered causing her friends to send her skeptical looks.  
  
"Has that happened to you lately, corn child one?" Kayleigh still sent her skeptical looks when she every so often glanced away from the road as she drove.  
  
Sara snickered as she teased, "Yeah Jenna, been to church lately?"  
  
"Leave me alone or I'll have Matthew Lillard attack you!" Jenna grinned.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Sara, relishing in the memory retorted, "Not if I sick Matty on you first, Jenna!"  
  
Both Kayleigh and Jenna stopped walking down the hall and stared at Sara in confusion. Jenna pat Sara on the head and said, still completely confused, "There there, little psychopath! You just need to lie down for a bit, I'm sure..."  
  
"So I'm guessing guys like Randy make girls lose their minds," Kayleigh commented dully. She pointed at Sara and accused, "You slept with Randy!"  
  
"I slept with him but I didn't sleep with him," Sara shrugged then started savoring thoughts of the past.  
  
~*~*~Flashback~*~*~ (A/n: Sorry.... I'll explain the scream queens thing though there isn't much to say. I'm just really liking these flashbacks! They are groovy to write!)  
  
"I should join a cult!" Jenna said randomly as she laid on the old brown couch lazily.  
  
Sara who sat on the concrete basement floor with a quilt wrapped around herself looked back at Jenna skeptically. She asked, "Why is that?"  
  
"I don't know! I would be an experience to add to my resume," Jenna shrugged as her eyes boredly landed on Kayleigh who sat in front of the television as she looked through a box of movies.  
  
"I can picture you in a cult! Your one of those people who would let everyone else drink the poisoned punch, laugh at their misfortunes then run," Kayleigh said distractedly, adding a laugh as she searched for a movie.  
  
Jenna smiled as she imagined herself doing exactly that. Then Sara suggested, "We should start a cult!"  
  
"What would we call it?" Kayleigh asked, still searching.  
  
"The scream queens!" Jenna eagerly suggested.  
  
"Okay.... I'm taking back the cult idea! Lets start a gang instead!" Sara said, imagining 'rumbling' with all the other gangs and beating up cops.  
  
Jenna considered the idea and said, "Yes! And we could vandalize things!"  
  
"You don't need to be a gang to vandalize things, you know," Kayleigh commented.  
  
"UNITY!!!" Jenna yelled.  
  
Sara grinned and thought out loud, "And every time we do evil things we can write 'The Scream Queens strike again'."  
  
"Yes we shall! For years and years to come," Kayleigh laughed insanely.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Stu and Randy walked in silence, glancing at one another boredly. As they turned the corner they saw Jenna, Kayleigh and Sara looking rather guilty as they crowded around a random door. They heard snickering and a semi-loud 'Pssssst' noise as they moved closer to the girls. Jenna whispered, unaware of the enclosing predators, "Don't write that, Sara!"  
  
"Too late!" Sara grinned as she reread what she just spray-painted, "'Every time you think impure thoughts Jesus kills another kitten.'"  
  
"Damn it, Sara! You're going to give me a bad reputation! Why couldn't you say God kills the kitties? I wash my hands of this!" Jenna joked as she stared at the word 'Jesus'.  
  
Kayleigh turned to smile at Jenna then noticed Randy and Stu and yelled, "Ah! Its the children of the corn number three and four!"  
  
"See? I remember good times as well!" Kayleigh said to Sara who now looked at Randy with a grin on her face.  
  
Sara slowly moved toward Randy, ignoring Stu completely. She squealed happily, "Your alive!"  
  
"So Kayleigh, which one of them is child of the corn number three?" Jenna asked in order to avoid Stu's staring eyes.  
  
Kayleigh looked from Randy to Stu, consideration and contemplation apparent in her eyes. She laughed then answered, "Randy is three because he rocks and Stu is lucky to be four since he tried killing my friends!"  
  
"What's with the vandalism?" Stu asked, changing the subject quickly.  
  
"None of your fucking business, bastard!" Sara snapped viciously at him.  
  
"Ummm...." Randy glanced from Stu to Sara nervously then asked, "What is with the graffiti, dearest?"  
  
"The Scream Queens strike again!" Jenna said as she darkly stared back at Stu.  
  
"What?" Stu inquired in confusion.  
  
"Its still none of your fucking business, asshole!" Sara snapped again.  
  
"Ummm....." Randy again glanced around nervously then asked unsurely, "What is with the scream queens thing, sweetie?"  
  
Jenna smiled in amusement at Randy's attempts to calm Sara that actually worked. Kayleigh shrugged and answered blankly, "We are the Scream Queens. There isn't much to explain. That's what we call ourselves."  
  
"Sometimes memories just come back to you randomly," Jenna added.  
  
Randy looked at the three girls in a mixture of skepticism and detection as he stated, "You girls don't look much like Jamie Lee Curtis...."  
  
"Jamie Lee Curtis can kiss my ass!" Jenna said defiantly.  
  
Stu looked Randy over, waiting for him to get pissed of as he commented, "Randy is like obsessed with Jamie Lee Curtis. Its sick!"  
  
"Well....." Kayleigh started laughing as she quickly said, "In your face because she dies in the Halloween series!"  
  
Randy looked darkly at everyone then looked at Sara's smiling face and relaxed. He smiled back at her and said softly, "Your my favorite scream queen."  
  
"Awwww...." Sara delicately wrapped her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek.  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes in misplaced disgust as she continued to glare at Stu every so often. Randy leaned in and kissed Sara on the lips, her continuing it. Stu rolled his eyes at them as he moved away from them and stood next to Kayleigh, staring at Jenna. Kayleigh smiled kindly at Stu then asked dully, "So Stuart, have you tried to kill any of my friends lately?"  
  
"That's right you fucker!" Sara pulled away from Randy's kisses but still remained in his arms as she glared viciously at Stu.  
  
Impatient to hear what else Sara planned to snarl at Stu she said listlessly, "If you ever touch anyone of us again you will pay."  
  
"Touch!" Stu said mockingly as he poked Kayleigh on the shoulder.  
  
"Go date rape someone!" Jenna snapped as she started walking off, away from Stu.  
  
Kayleigh looked at Stu in frustration and started walking after Jenna. Before leaving she said, "The Scream Queens strike again!"  
  
"Damn you Stu!" Sara said, annoyed. She pulled out of Randy's arms and chased after her friends with out saying good-bye to Randy.  
  
Randy looked after her longingly then looked at Stu in dislike then muttered sarcastically, "Aren't you a popular guy? I see all the girls love you!"  
  
'Let's just go take care of this Brock thing!" Stu said, annoyed and frustrated.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Author's Note:  
  
What did you think about the little flashbacks? I really liked them! Its going to be bitchin' to write the prequel which I plan to do as soon as I finish up this fic and start my sequel. Aren't you all so excited?  
  
Ummm....Was this chapter boring? It might have been.... I'm not sure.  
  
"Call the freaks up and apologize!" ~Handsome Davis, 'Cheats' 


	31. Whatever

As Randy unlocked the door to his room Stu remembered the phone call he had received earlier that day and said dully, leaning against the wall beside the door, "Hey, guess what? Stevo's family is coming in a few days to get Stevo's shit!"  
  
"Really?" Randy asked, uninterested.  
  
"So that means you keep your psychotic girlfriend in the dark about it!" Stu glared darkly into space as he thought of his blonde nemesis. With the thought of her in his head he murmured angrily, "That bitch."  
  
Randy unlocked the door and pocketed the key. He stared at Stu for a minute then asked in confusion, "Why can't Sara know?"  
  
"Because that girl is a fucking emotional nut!" Stu said coolly. Then he added, "I surely don't want her crying around me, mourning the death of her late but not great boyfriend, Stevo."  
  
"She wouldn't cry for him! She is over him," Randy insisted, trying to convince himself more then anyone really.  
  
Stu laughed wickedly then asked causing Randy to grow inferior, "You think she's over him because she fucked you?"  
  
"We didn't do that!" Randy snapped.  
  
"Your probably the only one who hasn't!" Stu stared at his nails boredly as he lied about Sara.  
  
Randy slapped Stu across the face angrily. Realizing what he did he apologized then said, "Don't talk about her like that!"  
  
Stu rubbed the cheek that fell victim to the slap and mocked, "You don't slap me, man! That's something a girl would do! Your girlfriend is a whore, you big girl!"  
  
"I don't think a girl is capable of what I did!" Randy said proudly as he opened the door to his room slightly, creeping in.  
  
Stu rolled his eyes as he followed Randy into the room, closing the door behind him. His eyes traveled the dark room, firstly landing on Randy's proud menacing face then noticed the lifeless body on the ground. He locked the door then moved over to the body and asked, "Why did you kill him of all people?"  
  
"He annoyed me..." Randy shrugged.  
  
Stu glanced up away from the body and looked at Randy with amusement as he taunted, "You just are mad because your bitch kissed him and liked it!"  
  
"You're just pissed because Jenna hates you now!" Randy retorted angrily.  
  
Stu looked down at the body again and changed the subject coldly, "So, what do you suppose we do about the body?"  
  
"I say," Randy enjoyed seeing Stu's discomfort at the mention of Jenna, "We do something about Jenna. She knows to much."  
  
"No!" Stu instantly said then added casually, "You wouldn't want Sara to go insane and kill me, would you, you big girl?"  
  
"I don't think I would really care!" Randy replied coolly.  
  
Stu rolled his eyes, forgetting for a moment that he stood over a dead body. He glared at Randy and said, "Sometimes I really don't like you!"  
  
"The feeling is mutual!" Randy glared back.  
  
Stu sighed aggravatedly then snapped, "See what that whore has done to you?"  
  
Randy bent down and picked up the knife he had used to kill Brock and pointed it dangerously at Stu as he spoke. He said slowly and threateningly, "Don't call Sara a whore!"  
  
"Sara is a whore, Sara is a whore, Sara is a whore!" Stu repeated in an immature tone.  
  
"Well..." Randy glanced around for something clever to say then snapped, "Your MOM!"  
  
"Anyway..." Stu blinked blankly then said emotionlessly, "Maybe we do need to do something about Jenna."  
  
"Yeah," Randy nodded.  
  
"Only if we do something about Sara as well..." Stu added casually.  
  
Randy began to nod then quickly stopped when Stu's words hit him. His eyes widened as he asked in bewilderment, "Why do we have to do anything to Sara?"  
  
"Because girls cant keep a secret even if their life depended on it," Stu answered then asked curiously, "Why does anything need to be done to Jenna?"  
  
"I'm pissed off at you and need to vent my frustration, " Randy answered in a sarcastic tone though it was true.  
  
Stu shrugged innocently, "Then you should just kill your whore!"  
  
"Same to you, buddy!" Randy smiled innocently as well.  
  
Stu crossed his arms over his chest and muttered, "Jenna is not a whore!"  
  
"Either is Sara!" Randy defended, shaking the knife at Stu again.  
  
"You know what we should do? You should talk to Sara then kill her! Then I'll do the same to Jenna!" Stu said, glaring at the knife in suspicion.  
  
Randy shook the knife more frustratedly as he responded, "I'm not hurting her! I love...." He trailed off, shocked at his own words then quickly said, "Lovely weather we're having...."  
  
"You love her!" Stu's eyes widened in horror, "Disgusting! Your in love with a whore because she fucked you!"  
  
"No she didn't and she isn't and I don't!" Randy defended.  
  
Stu began to plot then said mysteriously, "Don't you worry, Randy. I'll take care of your love."  
  
"The hell you are!" Randy rolled his eyes then pointed down at Brock with the knife as he said in annoyance, "Let's take care of the dead guy in my room before we try and levitate our body count."  
  
"If we must," Stu said, bending down to examine the body. He scowled and said in disgust, "He smells dead! Oh wait, that's you!"  
  
Randy rolled his eyes, unamused as he suggested blankly, "I say we just stash the body in the closet for now. We'll take care of him later."  
  
"Good! I'm too tired right now," Stu shrugged poked Brock's body with an extended finger, smirking at the lack of movement.  
  
"You grab his feet and I'll grab his head," Stu ordered as he bent down and put his hands under Brock's limp arms and lifted.  
  
Randy grabbed his legs and lifted at the same time. They slowly moved to the closet on Randy's side of the room. The door was already open so all they did was enter the walk in closet and drop the body. Stu walked out and noticed the blood the covered the floor. He glanced at Randy as he exited and asked, "What are you going to do about the blood? Are you going to clean it up?"  
  
"Hell no! Like I clean," Randy laughed at the thought then reached underneath Brock's body and pulled out a brown rug.  
  
He laid over the blood, clapped his hands together and said again, "Like I clean...."  
  
"Okay! Now lets get to plotting," Stu said enthusiastically.  
  
"Fine..." Randy pouted.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Jenna stood before a mirror as she pulled her thirteen ghosts black t-shirt over her head. It was long enough to wear as a dress if she wanted so she thought it worked nicely with her black skirt. As she modeled her outfit off to the mirror Sara who laid on her bed, reading the back of the SLC Punk DVD case asked, "Who are you getting dressed up for?"  
  
"No one!" Jenna answered truthfully as she flattened her cherished shirt down.  
  
Sara rolled her eyes in disbelief as she looked away from the movie case to Kayleigh who stared back. She asked boredly, "Do you think she's dressing up for Stu, Kayleigh?"  
  
"Who else is there?" Kayleigh shrugged as she flipped through the pages of a magazine as she stared everywhere else but at the magazine.  
  
Jenna pulled her hair out of her loose messy ponytail and ran her fingers through her hair. She laughed and insisted, "There is no one!"  
  
"Maybe she's going to steal Randy from me," Sara said in the same bored tone. It took her a moment to laugh at the thought of Jenna and Randy together. She laughed louder and louder then suddenly stopped and stared at Jenna oddly in suspicion.  
  
Jenna glanced away from the mirror and noticed Sara's paranoid looks and reassured, "Randy isn't my type, you jealous barracuda!"  
  
"Randy and Jenna forever!" Kayleigh teased.  
  
Sara sent her a dangerous look then said, "You all need to shut up or I'll bite you both!"  
  
"How is wearing my favorite t-shirt dressing up, anyway?" Jenna wondered as she looked back at the mirror.  
  
Sara rolled her eyes and said, "You all are boring me!"  
  
"Thanks so much for that," Jenna muttered sarcastically.  
  
Kayleigh finally looked down at the magazine she read and replied blankly, "If we're so boring then why don't you go see your killer boyfriend."  
  
"No.... If I go see him then I'll have to be around Brock then everything will be all awkward," Sara sighed drearily.  
  
"Fine!" Jenna snapped, tired of her complaints, "I'll go get him and tell him to come here!"  
  
"Whatever...." Sara muttered, her way of saying yes when she didn't want to.  
  
"Fine... I'm leaving!" Jenna walked toward the door then stopped once her hand was on the doorknob. She glanced at both of her friends and said emotionlessly, "If I end up dead just you two remember that I loved you both."  
  
"Yeah...Whatever...." Sara muttered, her way of saying 'I love you too, man!'  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes then grinned as Kayleigh said happily, "Child of the corn number one, you won't die. You're still a virgin! Virgins never die. Besides, Randy rocks. He wont try and kill you."  
  
"You never know with crazed murderers...." Jenna pointed out.  
  
Sara grinned mischievously as she said, "I'm sure you'll find a way to survive. You always do..."  
  
"Damn straight!" She said as she turned the doorknob and opened the door. She walked away, closing the door after her with a smirk on her face.  
  
Sara looked at Kayleigh who stared at her and inquired, "What's wrong?"  
  
"You're being a bitch right now..." Kayleigh informed.  
  
"Fine! I see how it's going to be! I'll just go wander the halls so I don't disturb you," Sara tossed the DVD case aside and got off her bed. She stomped over to the closet and pulled out a black trench coat and put it on.  
  
"If you're leaving what was the point in sending Jenna out to get Randy?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
Sara sported a look of deep contemplation until she said with a shrug, "When he gets here tell him he's boring and I'm breaking up with him...."  
  
"What?!" Kayleigh's eyes widened in surprise.  
  
Sara laughed wickedly, "I'm kidding. Just keep him busy until I come back. I need to pick up some Jolt."  
  
"Oh... Okay," Kayleigh smiled, relieved.  
  
"Remember to keep him busy! I need to talk to the bastard," Sara smiled as well as she moved toward the door.  
  
"Yeah, I'll keep him busy. But you better hurry because I only have so much to say," Kayleigh watched as Sara opened the door and left. As she watched Sara close the door behind her she muttered, "My friends are insane...."  
  
~*~*~  
  
Author's note:  
  
Okay... That's it for this chapter. The next chapter shall arrive soon, I promise! Guess what? Next chapter I'm introducing a new fucking awesome character. You all should be excited. 


	32. Who's He?

Sara walked through the doors of the main office building. She was bored out of her mind and wanted to create some mischief. She pushed through the glass doors that led to a room with a row of chairs ahead of a large white marble counter. Behind the counter stood a girl with short shoulder length blonde hair. She had a blank look on her face as Sara walked up and leaned on the counter. Sara grinned devilishly as she said, "Hi... I'm taking a survey and guess what? You're my first victim! Do you mind answering a few questions?"  
  
"Uhhh...." The girl hesitated then shrugged, "Sure. What kind of questions are they?"  
  
"You'll see," Sara looked down at her hands and thought before asking, "First off, Do you take part in unholy things?"  
  
"'Unholy?'" She repeated.  
  
Sara put on a businessperson type of voice as she said, "Unholy things include sex, drugs, rock and roll, and drinking. It very vital that I know if your the devil."  
  
"How can someone do Rock and Roll?" The girl wondered.  
  
"You just can! Now answer the question!"  
  
The girl leaned over and whispered to Sara with an embarrassed smile, "I've done all of them!"  
  
Sara gasped loudly then yelled, "You fucking groupie!! Just say no!"  
  
The girl looked taken back as she asked in confusion, "What does this have to do with the survey?"  
  
"I'm the one asking the questions here!" Sara snapped then asked politely, "What is your take on the murders?"  
  
"I think its like super sad..." The girl answered.  
  
"Okay.... Do you think you're possibly the next victim?" Sara asked, widening her eyes dangerously.  
  
The girl looked down at her feet and considered the question, her body going rigid with fear. She looked back up and asked back, "What makes you think I am?"  
  
"Because I'm dating the killer and he told me," Sara said dangerously, tilting her head back and laughing madly.  
  
"Excuse me...." She heard a male voice mutter and turned to look at him. He stood behind her and smiled. He was a gangly boy with shoulder length light brown hair. His teal eyes eyed Sara slightly as he smiled a dimpled smile. Sara, a little dazed, wondered, "Who are you?"  
  
"I'm Chip," He answered as he moved next to Sara and leaned against the counter. He looked at the girl behind the counter and said awkwardly, "Yeah, I'm Chip Sutphin and-"  
  
"Oh yes," The girl cut in, "The administrator told me tell you that you have to come back in like two days..."  
  
"Why is that, groupie?" Sara asked curiously.  
  
The girl sent Sara a cold glare then looked back at cute Chip and answered, "You see, we only have so much space here so we currently are making room for you."  
  
Chip looked around deep in thought then asked, "Where the hell am I gonna stay?"  
  
"A hotel, perhaps!" The girl rolled her eyes in a way that said she didn't care. She glanced at her watch then smiled overly nicely at them both and said, "You know, where your staying isn't my problem. My hour is up. Good bye!"  
  
The girl just started walking around the corner and out the door with out saying anything else. Chip looked over at Sara then asked, "What's your name?"  
  
"Oh... I'm Sara Black!" Sara answered boredly, eyeing him with great interest.  
  
He nodded in acknowledgement as he sighed and sat down in one of the chairs after moving away from Sara. He stared at her for a minute then asked, "Where do you suppose I can stay for the price of $3.76?"  
  
"Cardboard boxes sell pretty cheap now a days," She answered as she moved and sat beside him.  
  
He smiled slightly then asked, "Why do you think its taking them so long to prepare me up a room?"  
  
"Because someone is getting all knife happy and slicin' and dicin' in their way of seeking attention," Sara answered sarcastically, laughed slightly then answered seriously, "Its taking so long because they have to clear out the victim's junk and what not. Do you know who your roommate might be?"  
  
"Oh..." Chip looked up at the ceiling as he tried to remember. When the name finally came to him he answered quickly, "I think his name is Stu Killings."  
  
"NOOOO!!!!!!!" Sara shrieked in horror then realized that all of Stevo's stuff soon would be gone and she frowned.  
  
"Why? What's wrong?" He stared at her in confusion.  
  
Sara shrugged then answered in a slightly dark tone, "Stu is my much hated enemy. Hey, you want me to introduce you to the bastard?"  
  
"I guess you can introduce me..." He shrugged unsurely.  
  
Sara sprang up from the chair she sat in and said happily, "Before I introduce you to the bastard I'll have you meet my insane friends!"  
  
"Okay..." Chip stood up as well.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Jenna walked to Randy's room slowly as she watched the tiled floor with interest. When she finally found herself standing outside his door she hesitated before knocking. She wondered what a psychotic killer did in his spare time, out of the public eye. She knocked then quickly opened the door without waiting for him to answer. She walked in and said, "Hello Randy!"  
  
Randy laid on his bed until he saw Jenna enter. Then he jumped up and hurried toward the opened closet and slammed it shut. He stood in front of the door, guarding it. He smiled nervously, "Hey..."  
  
"What are you hiding?" Jenna narrowed her eyes in suspicion.  
  
Realizing Sara wasn't going to follow behind Jenna Randy asked, "Where is Sara?"  
  
"Why do you want to know?" Jenna teased, "Do you love her?"  
  
"My movie is not a romantic comedy, why thank you..." Randy answered.  
  
Jenna teased again, "Awww.... Wait until I tell Sara. She'll probably cry her little eyes out over you not loving her."  
  
"Maybe I do love her. You don't know!" Randy defended.  
  
"Was that a confession?"  
  
"Definitely not..." Randy muttered.  
  
"Anyway..." Jenna eyed the closet again with suspicion then remembered and stated dully, "Sara wants to see you."  
  
"Oh, really?" Randy grinned and relaxed as he moved away from the closet and toward Jenna. He wondered, "Is she in your room?"  
  
"Yeah..." Jenna answered distractedly as her eyes stared at the closet. Quickly and impetuously she ran toward the closet and opened it.  
  
Randy was slow to react as he turned and saw Jenna scream as she looked into the closet in terror. She saw Brock's body laying in the middle of the floor with most of his upper body covered in blood. Not really knowing what to do he just said nervously, "Shut up, Jenna!"  
  
She looked at him in terror and noticed him moving slowly toward her. Relieved that the door was still open she ran out of it, trying to make it as far away from Brock's lifeless form as possible. Randy closed the closet door and muttered in frustration, "Fuck!"  
  
He quickly decided on what he would do and thought, "I guess I'll go follow her and kill two birds with one stone and see Sara while I'm at it."  
  
~*~*~  
  
"I have a question for you, Chip." Sara stared as she led him down the hall, "What is your favorite movie genre?"  
  
"That's an easy question. Horror!!" Chip answered, excited just at the thought of it. "Blood and gore is what I live for!"  
  
"I have another question! Have you ever worked in a video store?" Sara asked, very happy by his answer to the previous question.  
  
He eyed her in suspicion then answered slowly, "Yeah..."  
  
"AH! Your exactly like Randy but your prettier," Sara grinned.  
  
He smiled from the compliment then asked, "Who is Randy?"  
  
"You'll see," She answered simply, a devilish smile creeping up her face.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Kayleigh slowly and tiredly moved toward the door after the sound of knocking filled the room. She yawned as she opened the door to a frantic looking Randy. Instantly Randy looked over her shoulder and asked, "Is Jenna here?"  
  
"I knew it! You and Jenna are lovers!" Kayleigh pointed at him accusingly.  
  
He looked over her shoulder still in an attempt to see who else was in the room. He replied nervously, "I just need to talk to Jenna...."  
  
"Come in...." Kayleigh muttered as she started walking back to her bed, leaving the door open for Randy. He walked in and closed the door behind him as Kayleigh laid down on her bed. She said with a sigh, "Sara went out to get caffeine and I don't know where Jenna is."  
  
"Oh....Then I guess I should go," Randy put his hand back on the doorknob.  
  
Kayleigh glanced at him then quickly said, "Wait! Sara told me to tell you to wait here."  
  
"Fine... Then I guess I'll wait," Randy said nervously as he moved toward Sara's bed. As he sat down he wondered where Jenna could be.  
  
~*~*~  
  
Jenna ran down the hall as fast as she could, not believing what she had just seen. She made the basic horror movie mistake and looked behind her as she ran to see if Randy was chasing after her. She saw nothing behind her but couldn't look forward as she continued to run. It wasn't until she ran into something and fell backward to the floor that she looked ahead of her.  
  
"What's wrong?" She heard his voice ask in confusion.  
  
She stared up at Stu fearfully as her heart pounded harder. She stood up slowly with her eyes wide in terror. He looked her down and mocked, "You look like you've seen a ghost."  
  
"I have..." She muttered as she attempted to sneak around him.  
  
He stared in the direction she came from and considered where she could have been and why she was so afraid. He asked her suddenly, "Were you in Randy's room?"  
  
"No..." Jenna lied, frightened by the question.  
  
She looked around and noticed that beside her was Stu's room. Firmly he put his hands on both of her shoulders, looked her square in the eye and said, "You saw him and I know..."  
  
"You know?" She looked back at him, a frown covering her face.  
  
He tightened his grip and whispered calmly, "I know!"  
  
"Leave me alone," Jenna glanced around the semi-busy hallway.  
  
She opened her mouth and yelled, "Leave me ALONE!"  
  
He opened the door to his room and pushed her in, not caring about anyone seeing anything. He slammed the door then yelled, "SILENCE!!"  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"So Randy, what is happening with you?" Kayleigh ask in attempt to make conversation. He had been sitting there for over an hour now.  
  
He sighed, looked at the door then answered, "Absolutely nothing."  
  
The door swung open and Sara said, "Okay Chip, this is my room..." As she entered she saw Randy and said, "Hello!"  
  
He looked at Chip in suspicion then asked, "Who is he?" 


	33. The First Cut Is The Deepest

Sara allowed Chip to enter the room before she closed the room's door. She smiled at everyone happily and said as she motioned to Chip, "Everyone this is Chip. He's starting here in a few days."  
  
"I'm Randy..." Randy said as he stood from Sara's bed and looked at Chip with immediate dislike. He glanced at Sara then just stared at Chip with a look of hate.  
  
Chip returned the look of dislike as he questioned, remembering Sara mention him, "You're Randy?"  
  
"Yeah. Why? Did Sara mention me?" Randy asked hopefully.  
  
Chip smirked and said, "She just said I'm prettier then you."  
  
Sara's eyes widened as she quickly looked away from Chip and Randy and said to Kayleigh, "So Kayleigh, Chip is staying with us for a few days, okay?"  
  
"Why?" Both Kayleigh and Randy asked, Kayleigh simply curious and Randy not wanting Chip to be anywhere near her.  
  
She smiled at him and answered, "His room isn't ready yet."  
  
"Can't he stay at a hotel or something?" Randy asked, a whiney tone inching its way into his voice.  
  
"Nope..." Sara answered, "It takes money."  
  
Randy rolled his eyes and Sara pointed to Jenna's bed and said to Chip, "You can sit down over there if you want."  
  
"Okay," Chip muttered simply as he sat down on Jenna's bed slowly.  
  
Sara sat down on her own bed and Randy sat next to her. Randy, still looking at him out of hate asked Sara, "Why couldn't he sleep in a box or something?"  
  
"Because I'm a nice person," Sara answered with a smile.  
  
"Since when?" He muttered.  
  
Sara looked at him in annoyance then grabbed Randy by the arm and stood up, dragging him over to the door. She smiled at Chip and said, "I'll be right back!"  
  
She opened the door and pulled Randy out of the room with force, slamming the door behind her. She glared at him and asked, "What is your problem, man?"  
  
"What is your problem?" He asked back, looking around the fairly empty hallways.  
  
"Why are you being all bitchy?" She asked, rolling her eyes.  
  
He rolled his eyes back and answered calmly, "I don't like Chip."  
  
"How can you not? He's basically you but..." She trailed off, stoping herself from saying that Chip was prettier.  
  
When she didn't finish her sentence he finished it for her, repeating what Chip had said, "But he is prettier."  
  
"I didn't say that," She defended, looking down at the ground.  
  
"GOD!" He snapped causing her to look back up at him. She raised her eyebrows questioningly and he added, "You are a whore"  
  
She gasped and slapped him. She snapped, "Drop dead"  
  
"Ladies first," He replied coldly.  
  
A smile crept up her face as she looked him over with amusement. When he sent her questioning looks she said happily, "Your cute when your mad."  
  
"Your crazy," He said, a small smile gradually replacing his frown. She kissed him on the cheek then smiled up at him as she said, "Now go away Randy I am not a whore."  
  
He stared at her in confusion as she walked back into her room, closing the door securely behind her. He blinked in confusion and muttered, "That girl is crazy."  
  
As Sara entered the room again she looked from Kayleigh to Chip then back. She sighed in frustration and said, "Randy is crazy." She smiled then realized Jenna wasn't there and asked, "Kayleigh, where is Jenna?"  
  
"I don't know. She hasn't come back yet," Kayleigh answered, realizing as well that Jenna hadn't returned.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
He stared at her tensed figure menacingly as he asked, emotion gone from his voice, "Are you frightened of me, Jenna?"  
  
She looked down at the ground, taking in a deep breath. She looked up again and looked him straight in the eyes with fake courage and answered, "I'm not afraid of you! I hate you!"  
  
"Interesting how you're not afraid of me..." Stu calmly commented, moving closer to her. He then yelled, "LIAR!"  
  
Jenna flinched slightly, backing away from him. He moved closer as she insisted shakily, "I am not lying!"  
  
"BOO!" Stu screamed in her face. She shielded her face with her hands.  
  
"See? You were lying!" Stu spoke calmly as he pulled her shielding hands away from her face with force.  
  
She eyed him in fear then responded coolly, "So I'm afraid of you. Who cares?"  
  
"Why are you afraid of me?" He asked dangerously, trying to induce fear as he spoke.  
  
She rolled her eyes and snapped, "Because your a murderer!"  
  
Stu backed away, taken back by her words. He avoided looking at her as he reasoned quietly, "You know too much."  
  
"Your going to kill me aren't you?" Jenna asked with a cringe, staring at him in paranoia, waiting for him to make a move.  
  
Stu stared at her blankly then said listlessly, "I see! I try and kill your friend and suddenly you think you're on my list as well."  
  
"Am I?" She asked curiously.  
  
He thought then gave a short laugh after answering, "Oh wait! You already are on my list!"  
  
Her eyes widened again as she asked, "Why am I on your little list?"  
  
"Because you know too much!" Stu answered exasperatedly.  
  
Jenna was bored of this situation already so she rolled her eyes. She asked dully, "Just so we all are clear, your going to kill me, right?"  
  
Stu thought about it then nodded with a shrug. Jenna just laughed causing him to ask, confused like, "What's so funny?"  
  
"You can't kill me!" She insisted, an innocent smile on her face.  
  
"Why is that?" He asked her, intrigued, "You don't think my conscience will let me?"  
  
"You probably don't have a conscience because you're a bastard!" Jenna answered then added, "Besides, virgins never die!"  
  
Stu thought about this, his eyes wide with contemplation. Slowly he said, "You're right!"  
  
Jenna smiled proudly up until Stu said, "I have to change that!"  
  
"Change what?" She questioned, already knowing the answer. Her smile was replaced with an uncertain frown.  
  
Stu turned from her and grabbed the knife off the bedside table. He clenched onto it as he quickly turned and moved toward her, knife raised. She couldn't react quickly enough as he pushed her back until she was pressed against the door. Stu, with his free hand locked the door as he said menacingly, "I'll have to alter you until your killable!"  
  
She opened her mouth and let out a shrill scream. Mid scream he cupped his free hand over her mouth and muffled the scream. Her eyes shook slightly in terror as she breathed in through her nose. Stu aggravatedly snapped, "Don't scream!"  
  
He glanced around until his eyes fell on his bed. He stuck his knife in- between his teeth temporarily as he used both hands, one still covering her mouth to push her over to the bed. He threw her on the bed, finally uncovering her mouth and taking the knife out of his own mouth. He threatened when he saw her prepare to scream, "You scream and I'll kill you now!"  
  
She closed her mouth instantly as her fearful eyes watched him open the middle drawer to his dresser and pull things out. One of the things she saw was a roll of duct tape. He dumped the things on Stevo's bed, turning his back on Jenna. He set down the knife and grabbed the duct tape, pulling a fairly long piece off. He dropped the roll and turn to Jenna who eyed the door longingly. He moved until he towered over her. He held the tape in a way, ready to apply it to her mouth. He sighed and asked, "Any last words, Jenna dear?"  
  
"Go to hell," She snarled fearlessly, not giving a fuck if she died.  
  
"That's all?" He raised his eyebrows questioningly.  
  
He moved the tape closer to her face, when it was an inch or so from her mouth she said, "Sara should have killed you when she had the chance! And your not hott, you psycho!"  
  
He narrowed his eyes in confusion, wondering what the hell that meant. He shrugged and put the tape over her mouth. She glared at him angrily as he turned away from her and moved back to Stevo's bed to retrieve something. Quickly Jenna moved her hands to the tape, trying to pry it off. Stu turned around and she quickly folded her hands in her lap. He eyed her suspiciously as he returned to her side with rope in hand. Upon noticing the rope Jenna shook her head feverishly. Stu smirked and said psychotically, "That's right, Jenna baby, I'm going to tie you up!"  
  
Her eyes pleaded 'No!' as Stu pushed her back, flat on the bed. He reached out his hand and asked politely, "Can you give me your hand, please?"  
  
She quickly, forcefully kicked in between his legs, harming his package. He yelled out in pain as Jenna pushed him away from her, jumped up and started running toward the nearby door. She fiddled with the lock frantically, stopping immediately as she felt Stu behind her and a point at her throat. Slowly and dangerously he said, "I could kill you right this second, slitting your throat."  
  
"But, I wont!" He added calmly, grabbing her by the hair and dragging her backwards. She tried to scream in pain but couldn't thanks to the tape covering her mouth securely. He threw her on the bed violently, so violently that she banged her head against the wall on the other side of the bed.  
  
Stu picked up the rope he had dropped and yelled, "HAVEN'T YOU LEARNED? I WIN! YOU LOSE!"  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and extended a middle finger at him, telling him with her hands to 'Fuck off'. Stu laughed in amusement as he got on the bed and moved closer to her. He snatched her hands before she could do something and wrapped the rope around her wrists tightly. He sighed and said, "Lie down."  
  
She shook her head and Stu held up the knife dangerously causing her to lie down. He crawled on top of her so he could move her hands to the headboard of the bed. He tied the remainder rope, attached to her tied up hands and wrapped it to the headboard.  
  
Stu looked down at her darkly. Her eyes closed tightly as she waited for the worst to happen. Her eyes shot open again as she felt sudden pain sear through the inner part of her arm. She looked to see Stu artfully moving the knife in her arm. He looked into her eyes and said blankly, "The first cut is the deepest."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Author's note:  
  
Chip is great. I love Chip. Hahaha, as Jenna said to me, me and Randy need counseling. I already wrote the next chapter so you get to read it. Good for you.  
  
I must go polish a machete or pine for the movie SLC Punk.  
  
Sara the psycho 


	34. The Last Cut Is Deeper

Author's note:  
  
The following chapter isn't that graphic but it kind of is, I guess. I thought I would warn you. You all rock my socks off and deserve a cookie.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The blood ran down her arm and onto the bed, staining the white sheets and pillowcases. He looked down at her black 13 Ghosts t-shirt that she cherished so much and smirked wickedly. He moved the bloody blade in his hand to her neck. She stopped breathing for fear that any movement would receive a slit throat. Stu moved his hand to the neckline of her t-shirt causing her to tense up even more then she already was. His wicked grin widened as he pulled the knife downward into the fabric of the shirt. Once the top ripped the rest of the shirt parted, right down the middle.  
  
Her eyes widened in shock as she shook furiously under his weight. She tried to lift her head but with her hands restrained she only could lift up her head an inch or so. She shook her head feverishly and he only looked amused. He faked sympathy as he asked, "What's wrong, Jenna dear?"  
  
She glared as his hands pushed the remains of her shirt off to the sides. He laid the knife down on the bedside table. He lifted his own shirt off over his head, tossing it across the room. She cringed as she stared at the scars she once pitied him for. She closed her eyes and turned her head to the side, tears leaking out. She wasn't crying completely for herself; she cried for her shirt. Her poor shirt that did nothing to no one but look greater then all. Noticing her tears Stu tilted his head back and laughed insanely.  
  
Stu moved down her body up till he sat on her knees. Her knees buckled under his weight as she continued to let silent tears fall. His cold hands slowly placed themselves on both of her legs. Her tears paused as his hands crept up her bare legs, stopping for a moment at the hem of her skirt. Her mind screamed 'NOOOO!!!' as she shook madly. She could just barely move her legs beyond a slight jiggle. She tried forcing the ropes off as she tugged and pulled her arms forward. This action only caused the ropes to tighten around her wrists.  
  
"Stop resisting!" Stu ordered sternly, "Give up!"  
  
Jenna shook her head to say 'Never' as she continued to glare at him. He smiled at her innocently, moving his hands further up her short skirt. She looked up at him pleadingly causing him to pause his hands and inquire, "What? I suppose you would much rather die then sleep with me, right?"  
  
She stared up at him in remorse, remembering the feelings she had for him before, she then pushed her attraction for him aside as she nodded her head to his question. He felt slightly offended but forced an evil smirk and said, "Too bad!"  
  
He prepared to move his hands again but instead pulled them out from under her skirt, making her look relieved. He looked at her tear stained face for a moment then said, "If you scream, I'll kill you!"  
  
He quickly moved a hand to her taped mouth, instantly pulled the tape off her mouth. He discarded it and watched as she glared and muttered, "Owww!"  
  
"You see Jenna, I want to hear what you have to say. What are your opinions?" He asked calmly.  
  
"Your a fucking lunatic! You should drink acid and just all around perish!" She snapped angrily, mustering fake courage and hatred like she had a few minutes before.  
  
He rubbed his chin as he pretended to be thinking hard about something. He made a long 'Hmmmm....' then said, "I respect that! I'm glad you were honest. Good work! If I wasn't going to kill you I would give you a cookie!"  
  
She looked at him, completely unamused. She frowned and said, "Go hire a prostitute! Leave me alone!"  
  
"I would but Sara's busy with Randy," Stu laughed loudly, unable to resist insulting Sara even at a time like this.  
  
"If you kill me Sara and Kayleigh sure as fuck aren't going to let this slide!" Jenna pointed out, anger still in her voice.  
  
"Why do you keep resisting?" Stu asked in frustration as one of his hands traced her stomach absently.  
  
Jenna stared at him to check to see if he was serious. When she realized he was she sighed to herself with uncertainty, refusing to answer him.  
  
Stu rolled his eyes and whined, "Just have sex with me, please?"  
  
Jenna glanced him over in confusion then questioned critically, "What kind of question is that?"  
  
"It wasn't a question!" He answered in a husky deep voice.  
  
She cringed slightly at his tone then asked confusedly, "Why did you say 'please' then?"  
  
"Because I'm nice!" He answered with a false modest shrug.  
  
"BECAUSE YOUR A BASTARD!!!" She yelled without considering the fact that this could be considered a scream. She then added to distract him from her yelling, "Plus, you need to get laid!"  
  
"I do need to get laid! Your right!" Stu nodded. He bent over her face and watched her for a moment.  
  
He kissed her forcefully, easing his tongue into her mouth. As soon as she felt his tongue she impulsively bit down then released. He sprang backward with the taste of blood in his mouth.  
  
"That wasn't very nice, Jenna dear!" He said as calmly as he could. He bent back down over her face and smirked. He then whispered softly, "Don't bite..."  
  
His tone sent chills throughout her bound form, making her shiver beneath him slightly. He pressed his lips against hers softly as his hands touched her, one rubbing her cheek the other moving up her leg. She resisted at first, remembering all the things he had just done to her, but she then thought about all the times she had had the urge to do the exact same thing with him that they were now doing. Thinking of when she didn't hate him and when she was attracted to him she gradually started kissing him back. He was surprised that she wasn't trying to bite his face off so he furthered the kiss by hesitantly easing his tongue in her mouth. More surprise came when he didn't receive another bite. Instead she furthered the kiss, trying to forget the things he had done and make the best out of the situation.  
  
His hand went higher up her leg until it went under her skirt again, she then began to move her legs in protest, moaning against his lips as if to say no. He suddenly broke from their kiss and leaned up, sending her a curious look as he asked, "What's wrong?"  
  
"You'll kill me..." She answered with a sigh, looking off to the side.  
  
He grinned and leaned down and kissed her neck softly. Between a kiss he whispered, "I wont kill you."  
  
He could feel her relax beneath him and turn her head back to face his. He kissed her quickly then asked, "Are you still afraid of me?"  
  
"Not at all," She answered in slight truth. She feared him but believed him when he said he wouldn't kill her.  
  
Glad to hear her words, Stu kissed her happily, starting out tenderly then settling in an aggressive kiss. He wrapped his hands around her thighs firmly. She completely forgot her fear of death as she groaned longingly, grinding against him slightly. He squeezed her thighs more as he grinded back. She felt more and more longing and heard less nagging in her head. Soon she forgot completely about her fear. She nibbled down on his lower lip as his hands moved from her thighs to back up her skirt. He pulled away from their kiss and started kissing and nibbling on her ear as his hands moved as high up her skirt as possible. Suddenly she said, "Untie me."  
  
"Why?" He asked, pulling his hands out in the open.  
  
She smiled devilishly and said, "Just untie me."  
  
"Fine..." He muttered uncertainly as he reached over and grabbed the knife off the nightstand. She eyed the blade nervously as he moved it toward the ropes. With a swift movement the ropes were cut and he put the knife back where he retrieved it.  
  
"Thank you!" She muttered politely as she let the ropes fall and rubbed her wrists. He saw her doing this and took both her wrists up into his. On each wrist he placed a soft kiss. He smiled at her then whispered softly, "A kiss to make things better."  
  
The devilish smile appeared again on her face as she kissed him forcefully. She rolled him over with her body so she was on top and said, "Hold on one second!"  
  
She got off of him and moved toward Stevo's bed where more rope lay. She snatched up the rope and turned back to him and said enthusiastically, "Let's do this Spanish Judges style!"  
  
"What the hell does that mean?" He asked in confusion, eyeing the rope cautiously.  
  
"You'll see soon enough," She said menacingly as she crawled on top of Stu once again. She grinned and said politely, "Now give me your hands, Stu dear."  
  
Slowly he put his hands in front of her and allowed her to tie the rope around his wrists tightly. Then she tied them to the headboard, just as he had done to her. He grinned and said, "I take it someone is into bondage."  
  
"It's a Spanish Judges thing," She shrugged as she touched Stu's scars gently.  
  
He felt like saying something 'hot' or whatever so he stared into her eyes and asked in a husky voice, "What's your favorite scary movie?"  
  
"Porn," Jenna answered instantly, laughing at the tone of his voice.  
  
He blinked at her in confusion then smiled longingly as Jenna unbuttoned the top button of his blue jeans. They didn't look away from one another's' eyes as Jenna slowly unzipped the bronze zipper to his pants. She stood off the bed and stood at the end where his feet just about hung off. She grabbed both the legs on the jeans and started pulling back quickly. Soon she fell backwards to the ground with the jeans in hand. She tossed the jeans aside and stood up. Once Jenna returned to view he began to grow impatient. He glanced down to his navy blue boxers and saw that his 'package' gave away his impatience. He didn't want to wait and he didn't think he had to as he forced his arms forward in attempt to loosen the ropes. He used more force when he felt the ropes' hold on him weaken. Finally the ropes just fell off his wrists and he was free.  
  
"Awww.... No Spanish Judges style?" She pouted slightly.  
  
He didn't say a word as he got off the bed and moved toward her quickly. She wasn't afraid of him in the least as he moved with her until they were pressed up against the cool pale walls. He nibbled on her neck as he tried to find the zipper to her skirt. Unable to find a zipper but continuing to search anyway Stu made Jenna roll her eyes. She quickly lifted her skirt slightly to reveal a pair of short Nightmare Before Christmas boxers with many little Jacks covering it. He looked down at her choice of underwear and grinned. Quickly he moved his hands to the waistband of the boxers and started kissing her forcefully in passion. As she felt his kiss she also felt him pull her boxers down slightly. Only being pulled down they fell to her ankles. She stepped out of her boxers and left them on the floor. She flattened her skirt down for a remote amount of coverage.  
  
She felt him pull down his own boxers and lift her up by her thighs as she wrapped her legs around him. She closed her eyes tightly as she felt him enter her. He continued to kiss her as he thrust into her. She, not knowing where exactly to put her hands wrapped them around his neck. The thrusts began to come quicker and more forceful. Each one caused her to press up further against the wall. He moaned softly into her mouth. It wasn't until Jenna grinded into his thrusts that she let out a very pleased moan.  
  
After trying out many different locations in the room they finally settled on the bed and Jenna was again tied up. She bit down on her lower lip as she felt him thrust into her again. He had his arms underneath her and pressed against her bare back, tracing her spine slightly. He planted soft kisses on one of her shoulders, leading the kisses up to her throat. Both had gotten the hang of it by now and were in sync with each other, grinding and trusting and moaning as if in clockwork. Jenna let out a loud shuddering moan as she tightened her leg's wrap around him. He groaned and gave a thrust of finality as he collapsed to the side, his head planted on Jenna's heaving stomach. They both sighed in satisfaction. After a moment of silence Stu laughed and said, "I love Spanish Judges!"  
  
"How many hours have we been at it?" Jenna asked, trying to look around for a clock but failing thanks to the restraint of the ropes.  
  
He shrugged and answered, "Quite a few..."  
  
"So we probably are destined to die," Jenna stated drearily.  
  
Stu reached over to the little table and grabbed the knife. As he cut her ropes he commented, "I think it was worth it."  
  
"Was it that long of a winter, Mr. Big Knife?" Jenna laughed loudly as her wrists were freed.  
  
He laughed as well then dropped the knife on the pillow between them. Jenna quickly grabbed the knife and pointed it at him threateningly. His eyes widened in surprise as Jenna cut across his stomach swiftly. She tossed the knife to the other side of the room. She relaxed and pulled a sheet over her while muttering, "No one ever touches my t-shirts!" 


	35. The Mourning After

He woke up to see Jenna sitting up and pulling one of his shirts over her head. He stared at her silently for a moment then greeted tiredly, "Good morning."  
  
She jumped slightly then relaxed upon realizing it was just Stu. She stood up from the bed, fully dressed and smiled at him. She simply said, "Hi."  
  
"You were going to sneak away, weren't you?" He looked at her with his eyes narrowed.  
  
"Yeah..." She answered, slightly ashamed.  
  
"I see how it's going to be," Stu laughed, "You slice a guy up and run away."  
  
"Well, we're even! You killed my shirt, remember," Jenna complained.  
  
He sat up and scooted toward the edge of the bed. The sheet was tangled around him as he motioned for Jenna to sit on his lap. She grinned modestly as she sat on his lap slowly. He grinned at her and said, "Stop bitching about it."  
  
"Your the one who's bitching about a paper cut!" She grinned back.  
  
He brushed her hair back and kissed her neck softly. She shuddered slightly and ordered with a laugh, "Stop it!"  
  
"No..." He kissed her again.  
  
"Santa, all I want for Christmas is to sneak back to my room before Sara goes psycho," Jenna laughed.  
  
He grinned and teased, "All Santa wants is a little lovin'...."  
  
"Can't you be patient? Didn't we do enough last night, horny bastard?" She teased, turning her face to face his.  
  
"It's been a long winter!" He answered. He kissed her tenderly on the lips.  
  
She quickly pulled away from the kiss and stood up. She replied happily, "I have to go now or I never will."  
  
"Don't leave me!" He whined.  
  
"I'll see you later, I promise," She bent down and kissed him quickly.  
  
As she turned to leave he said, "If you don't come back I'll go on a killing spree."  
  
"Aww... Isn't that sweet, Santa," She spoke sarcastically as she walked toward the door.  
  
He laid back down as Jenna left and muttered to himself, "God, I love crazy people!"  
  
#  
  
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#  
  
It was early the next day and Jenna had replaced her destroyed Thirteen Ghosts t-shirt with a shirt of Stu's. She knew Sara and Kayleigh would be asleep at this early hour of the morning so she decided to sneak in. She opened the door very slowly as she entered the dark room slowly and silently. She grinned devilishly as she closed the door behind her. She thought happily, "All I need to do is act like I was sleeping the whole time and they will never know what happened."  
  
She stared at Sara and Kayleigh's sleeping forms as she crept toward her bed. She saw Sara roll around violently in her sleep which caused Jenna to stop moving. She realized Sara was still sleeping so she continued her journey to her bed. Once she stood at the side of her bed she fell backwards. As she fell onto something she heard a tired voice say, "Hey! Watch it!"  
  
She jumped up and let out a quick scream. She looked him over and asked immediately, "Who the fuck are you?"  
  
"I'm Chip... Who the hell are you?" He responded tiredly, rubbing his eyes.  
  
A light went on from where Kayleigh was and she noticed Kayleigh stared at her tiredly. She smiled and said, "Hey there Jenna! I thought you were dead."  
  
"And you didn't have any problem sleeping with the thought of my death, I see!" Jenna smiled back, forgetting completely about Chip.  
  
Jenna glanced over at Sara to see that not even her scream woke her blonde friend. As she continued to look at Sara in paranoia Jenna heard Kayleigh ask, "Where were you?"  
  
"Who is he?" Jenna nodded toward Chip as she quickly evaded the question.  
  
Kayleigh looked over at Chip, laughed then answered, "He's Chip!"  
  
"Right..." Jenna looked down at the boy and wondered what the hell she missed last night.  
  
Chip moved out of her bed and questioned, "Your Jenna?"  
  
"Yes...." She answered slowly.  
  
Chip nodded while yawning and said, "Sara and Kayleigh told me plenty about you."  
  
"It's all lies!" Jenna replied quickly, her eyes glancing at Kayleigh suspiciously.  
  
Kayleigh continued to smile as she asked again, "Where were you?"  
  
"Um... Who is he?" Jenna again motioned toward Chip as she tried to evade the question again.  
  
"I'm Chip!" He answered, slightly annoyed from tiredness.  
  
"Stop avoiding the question, Jenna!" Kayleigh insisted.  
  
"ASSHOLE!" Sara screamed in fury as her eyes shot open and she sat up. Everyone stared at her in confusion and it took her a moment to realize where she was. She grinned goofily at their questioning stares and said, "I had a nightmare about Stu where he..." She stopped mid-sentence and stared at Jenna for a minute then asked abruptly, "Where is your shirt?"  
  
"Why are you wearing Stu's shirt?" Kayleigh questioned.  
  
"Why are you just getting back?" Sara asked, her eyes narrowed.  
  
Chip just shrugged, not really knowing what to do. Sara stood up from her bed after kicking the covers away. She moved so she was right in front of Jenna and she asked, her face filled with complete seriousness, "Were you with Stu?"  
  
"Yes..." Jenna admitted quietly as she avoided all eye contact.  
  
"What were you doing with him?" Sara asked, already figuring what Jenna's answer would be.  
  
Jenna sighed and decided she might as well not lie for Sara most likely would find her out soon enough. She looked Sara directly in the eyes and answered, "We did everything...."  
  
"NOOOOOOOO!!!" Sara and Kayleigh yelled together in disbelief. Chip just stood there uncomfortably, looking down at the carpet with false interest. Jenna collapsed on her bed and stared at her shoes in shame.  
  
"Did you eat a brain tumor or something? YOU'RE GOING TO DIE!!!!!" Sara yelled insanely as she punched a wall.  
  
Jenna looked at her in confusion and asked, "Why are you so mad? Its not like your going to die now."  
  
"Because your going to die, silly!" She answered in frustration.  
  
Kayleigh stood from her bed, walked over and patted Jenna on the head while saying, "Don't worry. You're not going to die if your screwing the killer."  
  
They all realized Chip was there so Kayleigh laughed nervously and said, "If only Stu was a murderer. Too bad he isn't."  
  
"Right...." Chip just looked at them in confusion.  
  
Sara glared at Jenna slightly then yelled, "SHAME ON YOU!"  
  
"I'm sorry...." Jenna apologized then said defiantly, "You know what? I'm not sorry! It was fun!"  
  
"SHAME ON YOU!" Sara yelled again. She grabbed her black trench coat that she had set on the end of her bed and put it on. She glared at everyone then said, "I'm going to pay Stu a visit."  
  
Jenna watched her carefully as Sara walked out of the room, slamming the door behind her angrily. Jenna glanced at Chip curiously and asked him, "Why are you here?"  
  
"Sara brought him here," Kayleigh answered.  
  
"Why?" Jenna wondered then asked him with her eyebrows raised, "Your not homeless are you?"  
  
"No, I'm not homeless yet," He answered with a tired smile.  
  
#  
  
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Sara stomped the full extend of the way to Stu's room. Once she stood outside his door she pounded on it with both of her fists. She didn't stop pounding until the door swung open to reveal a tired Stu looking back at her. All he had to cover himself was a single sheet and when Sara noticed this she said as she pushed past him, "Put some clothes on, man."  
  
"Why should I?" He asked defiantly as he stared at her in confusion, wondering what the hell she wanted.  
  
Sara looked around his side of the room and noticed the cut ropes on his bed's headboard and Jenna's mangled Thirteen Ghosts t-shirt. She then glared at him and yelled, "I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!"  
  
"Really?" He closed the door as he spoke boredly, "Then I'd best dress for the occasion."  
  
Sara rolled her eyes, looked over at Stevo's side of the room and asked instantly, "When Is Stevo's parents coming?"  
  
"In a few days, why?" Stu asked as he picked up a shirt from the floor and put it on while still keeping the sheet around his waist.  
  
"I was just wondering when Chip will be moving in," She shrugged as she picked up a picture of herself and looked upon it with disgust.  
  
"Who is Chip?" Stu asked suspiciously as he entered the closet to dress the rest of himself.  
  
She put the picture of herself in her trench coat's pocket and lied, "Chip is Jenna's whore."  
  
"Really? Is that so?" He questioned sarcastically as he left the closet fully dressed.  
  
"Speaking of whores...." Sara began then quickly lunged at him, her hands reaching for his throat. He was tired and slow to react as Sara started strangling him. He easily pushed her away and mocked, "That's all you got?"  
  
"You think your so tough cuz you sliced and diced some sluts, don't you? Well, FUCK YOU!" She glared at him as she kicked him in the shin.  
  
He whimpered slightly then threatened, "Your next!"  
  
He looked over the room until his eyes landed on the silver blade that lay on the ground toward Stevo's bed. He quickly moved around her and dived for the knife. He snatched it and stood up again. He turned toward Sara, pointing the knife at her dangerously. He threatened her darkly, "I'm gonna kill you."  
  
"You cant," Sara laughed right in his face then simply said, "Virgins dont die, dumbass!"  
  
"Like I'm going to believe a slut like you is a virgin!" He poked her lightly with the knife, not even cutting through the trench coat.  
  
Sara looked from the spot he poked her then back at Stu. She growled slightly as she punched him in the nose while yelling, "DONT TOUCH THE TRENCH COAT!!"  
  
"You wanna play, Sara?" He asked as his eyes widened in insanity.  
  
"Not really!" She snapped as she kicked him again.  
  
#  
  
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"Oh..." Jenna nodded as she spoke to Chip. "So you are going to be Stu's roommate?"  
  
"Yeah, I guess so," Chip answered simply.  
  
"What a shame...." Jenna thought aloud.  
  
As Chip looked at Jenna questioningly Kayleigh answered his stares, "Jenna is sad because now she cant go get fresh with Stu whenever she wants."  
  
"I'm sorry," He muttered insincerely, feeling slightly uncomfortable.  
  
Jenna sent Kayleigh an annoyed look and said in a tone to match, "Your making me seem like a whore, Kayleigh! Thanks so much!"  
  
"Any time, buddy!" Kayleigh grinned then looked at Chip and wondered, "Do you think we're totally insane, Chippo?"  
  
Both him and Jenna mouthed the word 'Chippo' then Chip answered, "I don't think you guys are completely insane, yet."  
  
"Well Chippo, it was lovely taking to you..." Jenna stood up and started walking toward the door as she added, "I have to go visit someone."  
  
"No you don't! Chippo, stop her!" Kayleigh ordered as she tried to get up and stop Jenna herself.  
  
Chip did as told and jumped up and leaped toward the escaping Jenna. Using a little too much force he tackled her to the ground until she was on her back and he was on top of her. They both stared at one another for a minute then began to laugh nervously. Chip quickly got up and helped Jenna up without taking his eyes off of her. He grinned slightly and said, "No escaping for you."  
  
"Thanks for tackling me, Chippo!" Jenna grinned back.  
  
He said back immediately, "Any time.... Really!"  
  
#  
  
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#  
  
"Slice and dice, baby! Slice and dice!" Stu laughed insanely as the blonde ran jumped on Stevo's bed to evade Stu's swift knife movements.  
  
Sara glared fiercely and snapped, "I can kill you now because your no longer a virgin! I seriously doubt you were a virgin before though, you whore!"  
  
"Your not the killer, silly child!" Stu eyed her as she jumped on the bed. He stood on the side of the bed with his knife raised as he tried to prepare for the perfect moment to attack.  
  
She quickly kicked him in the face with ease, thanks to her levitated 'shelter'. He felt blood rush down his face from his nose as Sara yelled crazily, "That's for Jenna's shirt!"  
  
She confidently kicked him again in the same place. She laughed dangerously as she yelled, "That is for basically killing Jenna, you bastard!"  
  
"Bitch...." He muttered weakly as he dropped the knife to the ground. He shielded his face with his hands and turned away from her. She screamed 'ROCK AND ROLL!!!!' then leapt of his back, wrapping her arms around his throat. He wailed about violently trying to get Sara off of him. He yelled, "Stop!"  
  
She let go and rolled her eyes while muttering, "Your no fun! Your supposed to let me kill you, dumbass. Don't you know anything?"  
  
She landed on her feet and started walking toward the door. She stopped, turned back to face him and said with amusement, "Never play with a virgin! You're gonna lose, whore boy!"  
  
"Jenna didn't mind playing," He replied proudly.  
  
Sara ran towards him, waving her arms in the air madly as she shrieked, "OOGA BOOGA!!"  
  
He flinched unintentionally as Sara reached down and picked up Jenna's mangled 13 Ghosts shirt. She smiled evilly and said, "We're having a funeral and your not invited!"  
  
"Good!" He spat as Sara turned and left.  
  
Once she was gone he muttered in annoyance, "God, I hate crazy people!" 


	36. Freaks For Funerals

Author's note:  
  
I have finally seen Mad Love so yay for me! It bothers me hearing Matt call someone else 'Matt'. When he first started calling the other dude 'Matthew' I was like 'Stop talking to yourself, Matty! People will talk!' I am a freak! Anyway, on with the story! Funerals for this chapter! It's all good. I wanna rape Randy and Stu.... Don't judge me on that! Usually (when I remember my medication) I'm quite the sane one.  
  
"I am a TRL virgin!" Matthew Lillard  
  
#  
  
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#  
  
"What is taking Sara so long?" Jenna wondered out loud in a worried tone.  
  
Kayleigh glanced at her and answered with a shrug, "She's probably murdering Stu around now."  
  
"I guess I'll get a room to myself then?" Chip asked hopefully.  
  
That's when the door swung open and Sara skipped in happily. She smiled at everyone cheerfully which caused Jenna to ask in slight horror, "You didn't kill Stu, did you?"  
  
"Sadly, no..." Sara glared darkly at the carpet as though it itself was Stu. She smiled again and said happily, "We're having a funeral, everyone!"  
  
"Who died?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
Jenna grinned and asked back, "Who hasn't died?"  
  
"We are mourning the lose of Jenna's virginity. And...." Sara added dramatically, "The murder of Jenna's 13 Ghosts t-shirt."  
  
She held up the torn shirt and Kayleigh gasped slightly. Chip glanced around the room uncomfortably until his eyes settled on Jenna. Then suddenly Sara turned to him and said quickly, "Of course you merit an invitation to the festivities, Chip!"  
  
"Is Stu coming?" Jenna asked.  
  
Sara laughed meanly at the question and replied, "Of course not, silly rabbit."  
  
"Should I bring flowers?" Chip asked out of amusement.  
  
Sara nodded in answer to his question then tossed the shirt to Jenna and said, "Find two caskets, Jenna! One for your purity and the other for the blessed shirt."  
  
"Okay..." Jenna muttered slowly.  
  
Kayleigh thought then wondered, "How the hell do we bury her virginity?"  
  
"Put pure things and a casket that represent her better days and we'll bury it," Sara answered.  
  
She turned toward the door and started walking toward it. When Chip asked where she was going she responded, "I'm going to invite Randy to the funeral. Oh! You guys need to wear all black! We must mourn."  
  
"We have to wear black?" Chip repeated as Sara left.  
  
Kayleigh and Jenna looked over each other's dark outfits and said together, "Done!"  
  
"Does anyone have any caskets on them?" Jenna asked, looking specifically at Chip.  
  
He chuckled and said, "I'm sorry. I left all my caskets in the back of my hearse."  
  
"You have a hearse?" Jenna and Kayleigh asked with great interest.  
  
"I was joking..." Chip laughed at their sudden interest. It fell silent for a moment and Chip blurted out in order to stop the awkward silence, "Huge appendages!"  
  
The two girls near him sent him strange, confused looks. Jenna slowly in confusion asked, "Why did you just say that?"  
  
"The truth hurts..." He answered and shrugged.  
  
Kayleigh looked him over then laughed loudly. She quickly stopped her laughter and said, "You guys, we have a funeral to prepare!"  
  
"Why must everyone torment me?" Jenna asked, whiningly.  
  
"Because its fun!" Kayleigh answered happily.  
  
#  
  
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Sara walked into Randy's room without even knocking. She was happy to see that Brock wasn't there and thought Randy just looked so adorable as he slept. She took her trench coat off and dropped it on the floor carelessly. She sat on his bed gently, sitting beside him in great amusement and feeling somewhat sneaky for some reason. She had to bite down on her bottom lip to prevent herself from laughing. She poked Randy a few times until his eyes fluttered open. As soon as they opened she asked, "You wanna have sex?"  
  
"What?" He sat up as his eyes widened in surprise.  
  
"Let's have sex, Randy!" Sara insisted with a crazy look on her face.  
  
"What? Why?" He questioned in confusion, rubbing the tiredness away from his eyes.  
  
She laughed nervously and didn't want to give her motive away so asked back, "Why not?"  
  
He looked to think all of this over, bewilderment still in his eyes as he stated, "We cant! We'll die."  
  
"So? Jenna is going to die so I figured I go with her," Sara smiled innocently.  
  
His confusion transformed into full fledged bewilderment as he asked, "Why is Jenna going to die?"  
  
"God..." Sara said in annoyance, "I wanna have sex and all you can do is talk about Jenna. Damn you, Randy."  
  
"Your the one who brought her up!" He defended.  
  
She looked at him frustrated and asked in a tone to match, "Why are you sending accusations at me?"  
  
"Sara, you need to stop mixing medications! Your crazy!" He shook his head in confusion.  
  
"I see how you are!" Sara stood up and prepared to stomp away. Randy grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her backwards. She fell back on the bed and he kissed her roughly.  
  
When she pulled away Randy eagerly said, "Okay, lets have sex!"  
  
"I'm not in the mood anymore! You ruined the magical moment we could have had," Sara stood up again and was pulled back down. She rolled her eyes and said, "I'll just have to wait for someone else to kill me..."  
  
"What?!" He questioned, jealousy and confusion in his tone.  
  
"It was a joke," She kissed him on the cheek.  
  
He rolled his eyes at her then asked, "Why must you offer sex then give me a weak kiss on the cheek? We are so boring!"  
  
"Do you wanna burn each other? There is nothing boring about that!" Sara suggested.  
  
He laughed then asked suspiciously, "Why suddenly did you want to have sex?"  
  
"Oh!" Sara decided she might as well tell him. She spoke blankly, "Stu and Jenna had sex so Jenna is going to die and I'm going to die with her."  
  
"No! NO! They didn't! They had sex? What? Doesn't Stu listen?" Randy rubbed his forehead tensely.  
  
Sara sighed then said all excitedly, "Randy! Let's have sex!"  
  
"Why?" He became confused again.  
  
"You see, I'm such a good friend that I'm willing to die so Jenna isn't lonely in hell. Plus, it will be fucking great to torture Stu even while I'm dead!"  
  
"You and your friends..." Randy shook his head in amusement.  
  
"As the beautiful Shaggy once said 'Friends don't quit!'" Sara quoted. Sara thought then remembered the funeral and asked, "Hey, do you want to go to a funeral with me?"  
  
"Who died?" Randy asked.  
  
"You'll see," Sara replied menacingly, "Oh! You have to wear black!"  
  
"Okay..." Randy said but he didn't move. He just stared at Sara for a moment, considering things he could do at that moment. He kissed her softly as he wrapped an arm around her.  
  
Sara pulled away from him and stood up. She glanced toward the door and whined, "Let's go! Dead things don't bury themselves, you know."  
  
"See? We're so boring!" He stood up as well and followed her to the door. She stopped, turned and looked at him and felt him kiss her while pulling her into him. She started kissing him back then stopped and said, "No! We have a funeral to attend!"  
  
"I'm not going," Randy pouted and turned away from her and started lurking back to his bed. A devilish grin spread across Sara's lips as she crept up behind him. As he collapsed backward on his bed Sara crawled on top of him. His eyes were wide as she kissed him.  
  
#  
  
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Jenna found a couple of empty shoe boxes in the closet and questioned, "Do you think these are casket enough for our crazy blonde friend?"  
  
"I guess so," Kayleigh shrugged, not really having an opinion on the subject.  
  
Jenna sat down on the floor and set the boxes side by side after taking their lids off. She, without looking, raised a hand in Kayleigh's direction. With out saying anything Kayleigh handed Jenna her own mangled 13 Ghosts t-shirt. Jenna took the shirt and hugged and kissed it before putting it in one of the boxes. She sighed sorrowfully and said, "Tragedy has struck!"  
  
"What happened to your shirt anyway?" Chip wondered.  
  
Jenna blushed slightly as she lied, "Sara's SLC Punk t-shirt went on a killing spree and 13 Ghosts Shirt was the first to fall victim to it's attacks."  
  
"In other words, Stu and her had crazy mad sex where he ripped her shirt to shreds...." Kayleigh summed up.  
  
"She lies," Jenna instantly said in embarrassment as she avoided Chip's wandering eyes.  
  
Kayleigh grinned slightly at Jenna's discomfort and tossed Jenna a black permanent marker while saying to her purple haired friend, "Well Jenna, if you have sex while being friends with crazy celibates your sex life becomes a major topic of discussion. You should have seen this coming."  
  
"You all are celibates?" Chip's eyes widened slightly.  
  
Jenna snorted then reassured, "No Chippo, we aren't celibates! It must be Kayleigh's word of the day or something. Sex is just frowned upon."  
  
"Apparently," Chip muttered as he watched Jenna pull the cap off the marker.  
  
Kayleigh looked at her bare wrist as though there was a watch there and wondered out loud, "I wonder what's taking Sara so long."  
  
"Maybe Randy murdered her. What a pity...." Jenna said emotionlessly.  
  
Chip laughed at her tone and asked sarcastically, "You can only hope, right?"  
  
Jenna started laughing loudly then stopped suddenly when she saw the skeptical looks she received. She raised and lowered her eyebrows repeatedly then said in a deep voice, "Did anyone here order a Love Burger?"  
  
Kayleigh joined in when Jenna started to laugh again and Chip just sighed as he thought, "Obviously someone forgot their medication!"  
  
#  
  
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Randy kissed her back and she pulled away. She grinned at him menacingly and said, "I'm no longer in the mood. Let's get to the funeral!"  
  
"Don't do this to me, Sara," He whined as she got off of his bed.  
  
Still grinning She replied, "Buy me something!"  
  
"Okay! What do you want?" He asked eagerly, watching her as she grabbed her trench coat off the ground and put it on.  
  
She laughed at him and insisted, "I'm kidding! I'm not a whore!"  
  
She started moving toward the door, rolling her eyes at nothing in particular. She looked at him again and smiled as she reached in her coat pocket. She pulled the framed picture of herself that she had taken from Stu's room out of her pocket and tossed it on the ground. She shrugged and said, "Use it for voodoo or something."  
  
He grinned as Sara continued to speak, "Put something black on and come over to my room when you're done. And just remember, you psychopath, chaos didn't kill the dinosaurs! Sex did!"  
  
"Your the one who wanted sex!" He pointed out.  
  
"We need to watch The Shining!" Sara said with a nod. When he asked her why she answered, rolling her eyes as though he should have known this, "You know! The dude tries to get fresh with the chick in the room and she turns into a decomposing ugly woman who's old!"  
  
"Maybe that's the kinda thing I'm into," Randy joked, laughing at Sara's horrified expression.  
  
Upon realizing he was kidding she joked back, "Then I guess things are over between us seeing as I can't give you what you really want."  
  
"I guess we should end it. It was good while it lasted, Oh lady Scream Queen!" He blew her a kiss.  
  
Sara laughed and opened the door. She didn't even look at him as she said, "Hurry up and prepare for the funeral!"  
  
She left, closing the door behind her. Randy sighed and looked after her longingly. He thought out loud, "She's out of her fucking mind! I like that..."  
  
#  
  
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#  
  
"So, your into horror movies, right?" Jenna asked Chip as she held the two shoeboxes in her hands.  
  
Chip opened his mouth to answer but Kayleigh cut in, "Like Sara would invite him to stay here if he didn't. He is basically Randy."  
  
"Why does everyone keep saying that?" He shook his head, not seeing any resemblance at all.  
  
"You both are video store geeks," Kayleigh explained.  
  
Chip pretended to be offended as he inquired, "How am I a geek?"  
  
"Take it as a compliment," Jenna insisted as she stood up from the floor, setting the shoeboxes on the nearest bed.  
  
As she stood the door swung open and Sara entered with goofily dreamy smile on her face. When she noticed everyone, especially Chip she frowned and asked, "Are you guys ready? Are you all wearing black?"  
  
"You have eyes," Kayleigh pointed out as she eyed everyone's black outfits.  
  
"Well, my dears, I shall change as well," She sighed and walked into the closet, closing the door behind her.  
  
Jenna stared after her in suspicion and whispered to Chip and Kayleigh, "I think she and Randy were up to no good."  
  
"I heard that!" came the muffled voice of Sara from the closet.  
  
Chip grinned and commented, "You girls are very entertaining with your constant accusations."  
  
"Well, you really wouldn't blame us if you knew us more," Kayleigh exchanged menacing grins with Jenna.  
  
Sara walked out of the closet, buttoning up her trench coat quickly. Chip stared at her oddly then said, "That was quick."  
  
"Yeah.... I'm as quick as the Flash," Sara got a childishly awed look in her eyes as she thought of the comic book super hero.  
  
"Nerd..." Jenna commented with a shake of her head. She grinned then asked, "What are we going to do now?"  
  
"We are waiting for Randy," Sara said, a cheerful smile taking over her face.  
  
Chip rolled his eyes, immediately feeling dislike for Randy. Kayleigh noticed this and said, merely to spite his eye roll, "Randy rocks!"  
  
"Its okay, Chippo!" Jenna said happily, "I'm sure you rock, too!"  
  
"Drop dead!" Sara said suddenly, not even listening to what anyone was saying. They all sent her stares that told her she was crazy and she smiled innocently and said, "I have issues..."  
  
"We all know," Kayleigh insisted with a slow prolonged head nod.  
  
Chip grinned as he said with child like innocence, "If you have an issue, don't worry because so does everyone around you. If you have many issues buy yourself a box of tissues. You can't say tissue without issue!"  
  
"Right..." Sara eyed him strangely then jumped slightly when she heard a knock sound from the door.  
  
"A little jumpy, aren't we?" Jenna teased as she walked toward the door and opened it to see Randy.  
  
He waved a silent greeting and peered into the room to see everyone ready to go. Sara smiled at him happily and said, "Your so slow, Randy!"  
  
"Its not his fault! Not everyone can be as fast as the Flash," Jenna grinned as her blonde friend returned to her awed childish trance at the mention of her favorite hero.  
  
Kayleigh rolled her eyes and asked, "What are we going to do with the deadness?"  
  
"We're going to bury them, Silly!" Sara picked up one of the shoeboxes and started heading toward the door. She moved past Jenna and pushed Randy out of the doorway carelessly.  
  
Kayleigh grabbed the remaining box and questioned, "Why are we burying them?"  
  
"Because they are dead," Jenna answered as Sara opened her mouth to speak. Sara nodded happily then stopped and stared at her purple haired friend and asked in a paranoid tone, "Are you reading my mind again, clone person?"  
  
"Yes, I am," Jenna replied sarcastically as she walked out of the room as well. She tried thinking of something witty to say and when it came to her she mocked, "There isn't much in there to read."  
  
Sara sighed, disappointed at Jenna's slowness and said, "You guys really are no where near being as fast as the Flash."  
  
Kayleigh left the room and Chip followed close behind her, closing the door behind them. Chip glanced around at everyone as they all began walking and asked, "Where are we going to bury the things?"  
  
"Who died?" Randy asked as he eyed the shoe box Sara held. Then he guessed, "Did you guys have a pet hamster no one knew about or something?"  
  
Sara glanced back at Chip and answered, ignoring Randy completely, "Well Chip, I think we'll bury them out side, in the earth."  
  
"Who died?" Randy repeated after everything fell silent. He glared at Sara slightly for ignoring him. Sara just smiled at him sweetly, blew him a kiss then stuck out her tongue at him in silence.  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes at them and answered, "In one box is my shirt that kind of ripped." She made it a point not to mention Stu as she continued, "In the other box is my lost innocence...."  
  
"Sara already told me about you and Stu," Randy said once he realized who she avoided mentioning. Sara's eyes widened as she smacked Randy in the chest, mad at him for saying what he did.  
  
"Sara, did you tell everyone?" Jenna asked in frustration. She then yelled loudly, "That's right people! IM A WHORE! Jenna Lively is a whore! Whore, whore, WHORE!"  
  
Kayleigh pointed at Jenna as she laughed and teased, "Whore!"  
  
"Whore? Me? IM A WHORE?!" Jenna questioned in a yell. Then she shrugged and said calmly, "Your right."  
  
"I need to meet this Stu fellow," Chip commented as he walked along with them, slightly startled by Jenna's outburst.  
  
Sara shook her head persistently and said, "No you don't! He deserves to BURN! Just like your cookies!"  
  
"Cookies?" Everyone repeated in confusion.  
  
Sara shrugged, "Cookies! You know, you bake them and eat them and puke them up because they're poisoned. You all are so perverted!"  
  
"What kind of cookies are you baking?" Kayleigh asked.  
  
"Apparently, poisoned ones," Chip commented.  
  
They pushed through the doors when they arrived to them and left the building. Jenna sighed and asked, "Aren't we going to look suspicious burying something?"  
  
"Hey, how the hell are we going to bury stuff? We don't have shovels," Randy added. Sara's eyes widened as she realized she forgot that minor detail as she muttered, "Ummm...."  
  
"Never fear! I have just what we need," Kayleigh reassured, patting the pocket to her trench coat. Chip eyed her pocket skeptically, "Riiight..."  
  
Cold wind whipped around them as they walked on the cement sidewalks, following Sara as she headed toward her ideal burial spot. She glanced at Randy, sending him devilish looks. He slyly placed his arm around her, which made Jenna roll her eyes at them. Then she teased, "I bet twenty bucks that you two end up dying just like me."  
  
"Never!" They said in unison as they exchanged looks that agreed that they probably would. Kayleigh shook her head in disappointment and muttered, "We all are going to perish by the end of this semester, I bet...."  
  
"So anyway," Jenna looked at Chip and asked, "Chippo, are you planning on running away from us out of fear?"  
  
"I'm considering it," Chip replied with a grin. Randy just rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to say something cruel. Then Sara stopped walking and announced in a piratey accent, "Alas, my pirate mates! We have reached our destination! Below my feet lay a buried treasure!"  
  
Everyone sent her odd looks and she tilted her head back and laughed insanely. Jenna looked to Kayleigh's pocket and said, "Okay Kay, what do you have that will dig a hole?"  
  
"I have...." Kayleigh reached in her pocket and pulled out a set of silverware: a fork, spoon, and butter knife. Randy raised an eyebrow and asked, "Why do you carry around silverware?"  
  
"I carry around silverware too, ya know!" Sara mentioned, patting her trench coat pocket. Jenna did the same, nodded and said, "We all carry around eating utensils of doom."  
  
"That's quite strange," Chip commented then asked, "How are we going to dig with those?"  
  
The three girls exchanged devilish looks then Sara looked at Randy and asked him, "Randy, will you be my slave?"  
  
"Slave?" He repeated. Jenna and Kayleigh glanced Chip over then stared at each other questioningly. Kayleigh wiggled her eyebrows and Jenna sighed, rolling her eyes. Jenna looked at Chip and asked in a strangled voice, "Chippo, be my slave?"  
  
"Yeah!" Chip answered immediately and impetuously. Jenna smiled and looked toward Sara and Randy expectantly. Sara kissed Randy on the cheek and asked again, "Will you be my slave, dork?"  
  
"Why?" He asked. Sara reached into one of her pockets and pulled out a crumpled up dollar. She placed the dollar in his hand and said, "Fine! I'll buy you!"  
  
"Okay...." Randy finally agreed, pocketing the dollar. Sara moved away from Randy, pointed to the ground and ordered, "Okay Slave boy, dig a hole!"  
  
"What she said!" Jenna pointed to Chip the ground. Both Randy and Chip looked confused and questioned in unison, "Are you serious?"  
  
"Fuck yeah!" Sara and Jenna answered together, nodding toward the ground. Kayleigh handed Randy a spoon and Chip a knife. They both just stared at the utensils until Jenna ordered, "Get to it, slaves!"  
  
Randy shook his head, laughing as he got down of his knees and drove the spoon into the ground. Sara moved toward him and petted his head while saying angelically, "That's a good slave boy!"  
  
"I think I'm going to regret this," Chip mumbled as he got down on the ground next to Randy, stabbing the ground with the knife.  
  
#  
  
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Stu hung up the phone and said as though Sara was there, "Fuck you, Sara!"  
  
He laid back down, cracking his knuckles impatiently as he wondered when Jenna would be back. He smiled at the thought of last night then thought of what Randy would say. He probably would start ranting about how he was going to have to kill Stu and what not. Stu shook his head slightly, amusement in his eyes. He wondered what Jenna was doing right now.  
  
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Randy and Chip stood up from the ground once they finished digging up two shallow holes. Randy stared at Sara for a moment then asked sarcastically, "Will that be all, Mistress Sara?"  
  
"Fine, you big baby!" Sara rolled her eyes then looked toward Jenna and said, "We shall bury the shirt first because all shall miss it, you big whore!"  
  
They had set the two shoebox caskets on the ground so Kayleigh now retrieved one of them. She handed it to Jenna and muttered, "God speed, wing commander!"  
  
"I'm not on speed, I swear!" Jenna replied instantly as she accepted the box. Chip grinned and whispered to Randy, "Your lucky. Your mistress isn't taking speed."  
  
Randy just stared at Chip in annoyance and moved away from him. Chip sighed and muttered to himself, "Tough crowd."  
  
"Indeed," Kayleigh muttered back.  
  
Jenna sighed and took a step toward the new hole in the ground and set the box in there. Not knowing what else to do she looked at Sara expectantly. Sara rolled her eyes and moved beside her while ordering everyone else, "Get over here! Show some respect to the dead!"  
  
They all huddled around the hole, Randy standing next to Sara and having Kayleigh stand between him and Chip who gladly stood by Jenna. Sara eyed her own, Jenna's, and Kayleigh's trench coats and commanded, "Coats off."  
  
Both Jenna and Kayleigh took off their coats and waited for Sara to do the same. Sara smiled a big, evil smile as she removed her coat to reveal a bright white outfit. Everyone glared slightly and Kayleigh questioned, "What's with the outfit? I thought we were all to wear black and mourn."  
  
"As if I'm gonna be a sheep and do whatever everyone else does," Sara shrugged innocently then said, "Let's get to the funeral. You all can attack me later."  
  
Everyone reluctantly stared at the ground in silence. Kayleigh bent down and took off the lid of the shoebox casket. She stood up straight and held the lid tightly in her hands. Everyone sent her questioning stares and she said, "I think the shirt deserves an open casket."  
  
"Lets all say a few words starting with Jenna!" Sara suggested. Jenna nodded and said in a serious tone, "We are gathered here today to mourn the death of the greatest goddamn t-shirt there ever was-"  
  
"My SLC Punk shirt is better," Sara cut in then silenced herself by placing a hand over her own mouth.  
  
"Right," Jenna rolled her eyes at Sara than continued, "All I want to say to you, shirt, is that I'm sorry I can't sew."  
  
After a moment of silence Kayleigh said in the same seriousness Jenna had, "We shall avenge your death."  
  
"I loved you, shirt!" Sara said, "I loved you like you were my own. If you were I wouldn't have let this happen to you. I'm sorry I never got the opportunity to molest you."  
  
Silence fell and Sara elbowed Randy to get him to talk. He thought for a moment then said with uncertainty, "I'm sorry I couldn't get to know the shirt better."  
  
"What he said," Chip nodded. Randy glared at him while Sara said, "Onto Jenna's lost essence."  
  
"Why are you here anyway?" Randy questioned Chip, dislike in his voice.  
  
"What's it to you?" Chip asked back.  
  
Randy glared and said, "I don't like you."  
  
"Awww. Break my heart, why don't you!" Chip replied sarcastically.  
  
"Gladly," Randy shoved Chip slightly. Chip, surprise on his face, shoved back. The three girls just stood there watching with amusement.  
  
"Slaves, stop!" Sara ordered as Randy punched Chip in the stomach. Jenna rolled her eyes and wanted to leave before they buried her virginity. That's when she decided she would.  
  
Kayleigh tried to break them up by slapping them both on their heads. Sara just stared at the two boys in annoyance. With her friends busy, Jenna decided that this would be the perfect moment for escaping. She started slowly backing away then just started running away with out anyone noticing.  
  
"Stop it, losers or I'll rape you!" Sara said, saying the first thing that came to mind. Randy stopped what he was doing and turned to Sara. She raised an eyebrow at him, questioning why he stared at her.  
  
"Are you going to rape me?" Randy asked, a smile appearing on his face. Sara winked at him and said in a slightly sarcastic tone, "Oh yeah, baby!"  
  
"We're here mourning the death of Jenna's essence and you two just wanna have sex. Well, down with date rape!" Kayleigh shook her head in disappointment at the two.  
  
"Hey!" Chip looked around then asked, "Where'd Jenna go?"  
  
This made everyone look around in search of their purple haired friend. Sara snapped her fingers and said, "Damn it! She escaped!"  
  
"Well?" Randy asked uncertainly, "Should we go after her?"  
  
"She's gonna go see Stu, I bet," Kayleigh thought out loud. Sara looked to be thinking up until she said, "We'd best not. I for one don't want to walk in on those two whores doing whatever they do."  
  
"Should we continue the ceremony without her?" Chip asked. Sara slowly nodded.  
  
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Stu was about to doze off to sleep when he heard a knock at the door. His eyes shot open and he jumped up feeling kind of paranoid. Slowly he shuffled toward the door and opened it. When he saw who it was he smiled and said is an overly confident tone, "Hey Jenna! I see you came back for more."  
  
"Whatever you say," She rolled her eyes and walked into the room. She stared at Stu for a moment and admitted, "Everyone knows."  
  
"I figured as much when Sara tried to kill me," Stu nodded and closed the door behind him. He grinned at her eagerly and she just returned the smile in a shy way. He slowly crept toward her while asking, "Does Randy know yet?"  
  
"Yep," Jenna nodded, sighing loudly. When he finally stood in front of her he wrapped his arms around her and asked, "How did you manage to sneak away?"  
  
"I killed them!" She joked. He moved his face closer toward her's and muttered approvingly, "Good."  
  
She stared into his eyes, wonderingly until they closed when he kissed her. He started moving her backward as they kissed until he moved her onto his bed. He felt her laugh through the kiss and asked, "What's so funny?"  
  
"You are such a man whore!" She pointed out.  
  
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Sara sat on the ground with the second shoebox on her lap. She opened the lid and tossed it aside. Randy stood as far away from Chip as possible after Kayleigh had separated them. Kayleigh stood over Sara, staring down at the box. She asked her blonde friend, "What's in there?"  
  
"Drugs!" Sara lied as she lifted a white envelope out of the box. She ripped open the envelope and pulled out what was inside and saw that they were pictures of people she didn't recognize. Sara wondered out loud, "Who the hell are they?"  
  
Both Randy and Chip came over to her and looked at the pictures. Almost in unison they both answered, "That would be the virgin survivor of Friday the 13th part five." They glared at each other for a moment then moved back to their separated spots. Sara stared at the picture and exclaimed, "You're right!"  
  
She viewed all the pictures and pointed out, "These all are virgin survivors of horror movies!" When she came across a picture of Jamie Lee Curtis she waved it in the air and teasingly asked, "Hey Randy, do you want this since you love her oh so much?"  
  
Randy squinted at the picture, grinned and replied sarcastically, "Oh yeah!"  
  
"Fine!" She tossed the picture towards him but it didn't go very far. Sara returned the pictures to the envelope and set it off to the side. Kayleigh bent down and picked up the a video tape that was labeled 'Evil Porno' and laughed while saying, "Poor Jenna."  
  
"What is it?" Chip questioned. Kayleigh grinned at him then Sara and answered simply, "Just a scary movie Sara made Jenna watch. It scared her out of sex for a long time."  
  
"Porn does that, you know..." Sara grabbed a small leather black bible and gasped. She yelled for no reason, "Jenna owns a Bible! What is the world coming too?!"  
  
"You know what," Randy began after a moment of silence. He stared up at the sky and said, "I bet it'll rain soon."  
  
"Good," Sara and Kayleigh said simply.  
  
#  
  
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Jenna glared at the ceiling as Stu kissed her neck. Unable to resist she said seriously, "You owe me fifty bucks."  
  
He stopped kissing her for a moment, pulled his head back and stared at her questioningly. He laughed unsurely and asked, "Why?"  
  
"You owe me money for the shirt and the emotional trauma you've caused me," She answered, still serious.  
  
"No!" He said simply.  
  
"Come on, man whore!" She teased, "You owe me!"  
  
"I'll get you the money eventually...." He rolled his eyes. She laughed and said, "Thanks, loser!"  
  
He quickly returned to kissing her neck.  
  
#  
  
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They felt sprinkles of water fall from the sky after they had covered the now sealed shoeboxes with dirt. Kayleigh stared at Randy with surprise and asked, "Are you psychic?"  
  
It quickly began to rain harder and Sara leaned on her back on the cool grass and let the rain fall upon her. She laughed happily and everyone stared at her in silence. Then she ordered, "Slave boy Randy, come here!"  
  
He walked over to her with out resisting and stared at her questioningly. She patted the spot of grass next to her and he sat down beside her. She pulled him backwards so that he was laying down too. They stared at each other in silence.  
  
"I'm melting!" Kayleigh shrieked. This didn't even get Randy or Sara's attention as he slowly kissed her. Kayleigh rolled her eyes and turned toward Chip. She said in annoyance as he watched them uncomfortably, "Chippo, we might as well return to the room before I melt away into nothingness."  
  
"Okay," He agreed as Kayleigh started heading in the direction in which they came. Sara and Randy didn't even notice as they continued to kiss in the rain.  
  
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Author's note:  
  
Wow.... Long chapter. That probably sucked but never fear for I will edit it later on... 


	37. The Latin Lick

Author's Note and such:  
  
does the Snoopy dance There! I haven't done that in a great while... Now, on with the story! Also, you all should listen to The Living End's son 'Prisoner of Society'. It's good!  
  
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Stu sat on Brock's bed as Randy sat on his own and stared at Stu. Stu stared back and asked, annoyed, "What do you want, loser?"  
  
"Tell me about you and Jenna," Randy commanded. Stu laughed nervously and said, "No, you pervert!"  
  
Randy rolled his eyes and said, "I'm very disappointed in you."  
  
"Cry me a fuckin' river then!" Stu sighed loudly and looked at the floor. Randy said nothing which made Stu look back up and saw Randy glaring at him.  
  
Randy began to rant angrily, "You fucking idiot! You aren't supposed to have sex because you're gonna die now! I really should kill you now! You and Jenna both have to die!"  
  
"No!" Stu replied simply and Randy continued to rant, "You two should be more like me and Sara! Abstinence!"  
  
Stu shook his head and said bitterly, "Sara is a slut."  
  
Randy stood up suddenly and paced around while saying, "That's funny seeing as you're the whore! Sara didn't do anything so there!"  
  
"That's right... " Stu said with a cool, calm tone, "That's all she'll ever do! Nothing! You loser!"  
  
"Yeah? Well apparently Jenna does too much!" Randy replied angrily.  
  
"Hey, man!" Stu stood up as well, "Don't say anything about Jenna! We're not going to talk about her!"  
  
"Then don't talk about Sara!" Randy snapped, "It's like your obsessed with her!"  
  
"Who?" Stu asked in confusion, "Sara? I'm obsessed with Sara?"  
  
"Yeah! All you do is plot against her and call her a slut!" Randy explained. Stu shrugged and muttered, "If I am obsessed then its in a bad way!"  
  
"How about we not talk about our little lady friends and we take care of Brock?" Randy suggested. Stu nodded, "Fair enough."  
  
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Chip sat on Sara's bed as she stared at him. Jenna glanced between them with an amused smile on her face as she sat on her own bed. Kayleigh sat beside her and whispered, "Sara raped Randy."  
  
"No, I didn't! Barely," Sara defended in an irritated way. She still stared at Chip until she ordered, "Chip, give me your hand!"  
  
"Why?" He asked hesitantly as he noticed both Jenna and Kayleigh shaking their heads while mouthing the word 'No!'  
  
Sara reached over and grabbed a bottle of white out from the top of the bedside table. She shook it and explained, "I wanna paint your nails."  
  
"Why?" He repeated in even more hesitation as Jenna and Kayleigh shook their heads more violently.  
  
Sara smiled innocently and said, "I'll love you always."  
  
"Fine..." Chip reluctantly gave permission and gave her his left hand. Sara took the lid off of the white out and started painting his nails with it, starting with his middle finger. As she painted away in great concentration she asked, "Jenna, why'd you leave before the funeral was over?"  
  
Jenna grinned shyly and answered in a slow, slightly ashamed tone, "I promised Stu I'd return to him."  
  
"You had just seen him a few hours earlier!" Kayleigh pointed out.  
  
Jenna didn't really wanna talk about Stu so she blurted out, "Stop fucking dwelling! It's over with!"  
  
"Fine," Kayleigh stood up and walked over to her own bed and laid down while muttering, "Be that way."  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to apologize then decided against it. Sara started to stare at Jenna as she continued to paint. With her eyes away from her 'canvas' she sloppily got white out from Chip's nail to his knuckle. It wasn't until Chip exclaimed, "Hey there!"  
  
"How goes it?" Sara asked in a dazed voice as she looked back at him. He motioned with his eyes to his hand and she followed his directional stares. When she noticed the mess she made she laughed loudly and said insincerely, "I'm sorry."  
  
"I'm tired!" Jenna shared. Sara sent her a look that said 'Then go to sleep' and she laid down flat on her mattress.  
  
Sara went back to staring at Chip and he stared back. She put the white out off to the side and put her hands on his face and turned it in the other direction slowly. With his cheek facing her she licked it which made Chip mutter in a confused way, "Oh, okay..."  
  
"Ego amor tu!" Sara said happily which made both Jenna and Kayleigh sit up from their beds and stare at her in shock. Chip just asked in a lost tone, "What?"  
  
"I can't believe you just said that!" Kayleigh still stared in shock, ignoring Chip when he repeated his lost question, "What?"  
  
Jenna just pointed an accusing finger at her blonde friend and said, "Whore!"  
  
"Ego silens amor Randy," Sara shrugged innocently.  
  
Chip glanced around in confusion and questioned in a solid voice, "What does it mean?"  
  
"Its Latin for 'I love you'," Kayleigh answered. Sara laughed and explained, "I was kidding!"  
  
An awkward silence embraced the room and soon Jenna and Kayleigh laid back down. Finally Chip asked, "Where will I sleep?"  
  
"Right here," Sara answered innocently as she patted her bed. When Jenna sat up again Sara explained, "I'm sleeping on the floor, okay!"  
  
Jenna once again settled back into a comfortable sleeping position. Sara licked the side of Chip's face again then crawled off of her bed until she was lying on the floor. Chip hesitantly laid down on her bed as Sara said, "Good night, Kayleigh! Good night, Chip! Good night, whore!"  
  
Kayleigh grunted back, Chip just nodded and Jenna replied, "Right back at you, slut!"  
  
#  
  
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"Fuck! We're late!" Randy pointed out as he and Stu dashed toward the film building. Stu just tiredly grunted as he glared at the early sun light. They soon made it to the doors of the building and entered through them hastily. They quickly made there way to the class room and were surprised to see what they did.  
  
Now staring into an empty classroom Stu asked, "Where is everyone?"  
  
Randy slowly looked down at his watch then murmured in a very embarrassed voice, "They won't be here for another hour."  
  
"Why?" Stu questioned.  
  
"Because we're an hour early," Randy muttered. He thought Stu would yell or something but he didn't. Stu just fell to the ground, curled up in a ball and said, "Wake me up in an hour."  
  
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"So, it'll be okay for me to go to class?" Chip asked as he followed behind Jenna and Sara. Sara just nodded dismissively as she asked Jenna, "Are you gonna ditch me and sit next to Stu?"  
  
"Nope," Jenna answered after considering it then deciding against it. Sara smiled happily and said, "Ego amor tu, Jenna!"  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes, looked toward Chip and teased, "Since your arrival she's returned to her Latin craze! Damn you, Chippo!"  
  
"I'm sorry?" He insincerely apologized in a lost tone.  
  
They slowly made their way to the doors to the film building. Chip held the door open as Jenna and Sara entered the building. Chip followed them in and noticed as Sara ran towards Randy. He just rolled his eyes and followed Jenna.  
  
Sara raced toward Randy, kissed him on the cheek then started dragging him into the half full classroom. She smiled at him and asked, "How goes it, loser?"  
  
"It goes good," He answered as she lead him to back seats they always sat in. Once they sat down, him in the desk next to the wall and her sitting beside him. They didn't say or do anything until Sara kissed him.  
  
Still standing in the hallway, Chip just stood there not knowing what to do. Jenna nodded for him to follow her and he did as she walked. She stopped suddenly as she noticed Stu's sleeping figure on the floor. Chip stopped close behind her and eyed the Stu not knowing who the hell he was. Jenna quickly moved toward Stu and Chip just stayed where he was.  
  
"Stu!" Jenna crouched down and poked him. Chip nodded, finally realizing that he now stared at his potential roommate.  
  
Stu stirred until he his eyes shot open and he stared up at Jenna. He smiled tiredly then asked, "Did we have sex again?"  
  
"Not quite," Jenna answered with a laugh. She offered him her hand and helped Stu off the ground. The smiled at one another until Jenna glanced toward Chip with realization and exclaimed, "OH! Stu, this is Chip!"  
  
As Jenna motioned toward Chip, Stu just raised an eyebrow in confusion. Chip waved as Jenna explained, "He'll be your roommate soon."  
  
"Really now?" Stu eyed Chip in the new light of wonder. Stu greeted, "Hey there Chip! I see you've met Jenna."  
  
"Yeah," Chip nodded then glanced around with shifty eyes. Stu leaned in and whispered, "Whatever you do stay away from this one psycho named Sara. She is fuckin' evil!"  
  
"Too late, Stu," Jenna rolled her eyes at him, grabbed Chip by the wrist and started dragging him into the classroom. Stu was too tired to notice this and followed behind them.  
  
When they entered everyone's eyes were on Chip but he didn't seem to notice. Jenna looked at the teacher then yelled to him, "Hey, Mr. Connors!"  
  
The teacher looked up from the book he was reading and asked, "What?"  
  
"This is Chip Something and he's gonna be attending this class so screw you," Jenna said meanly then led Chip back to where Sara and Randy sat, still kissing. Jenna motioned for Chip to sit in between her and Sara and he did. Stu sat beside Jenna and casually put a hand on her leg. She snorted and muttered, "Whore."  
  
"You know you like it," He wiggled his eyebrows.  
  
Sara started making gagging noises then said in disgust, "Get a fuckin' room!" She thought about this then corrected quickly when Jenna and Stu grinned menacingly, "Wait! Don't get a room!"  
  
"Make up your damn mind!" Jenna replied with a roll of her eyes.  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
It now was the end of class and Stu was sound asleep on Jenna's shoulder. Jenna slowly moved Stu so that his head was on his desk and didn't seem bothered by this movement. Randy sat there staring at the departing people with great interest. Sara, mad that Randy wasn't paying any attention to her, turned to face Chip. He looked back at her. She grinned, turned his head so it pointed directly toward the door, and licked the side of his face.  
  
Jenna leaned forward and watched as Chip glanced around without moving at all from fear of Sara or something. Jenna noticed his discomfort, looked over at Stu to see him still sleeping then quickly turned toward Chip and quickly licked the side of his face that faced her. He narrowed his eyes as the two girls licked him. As they continued he said, "This should bother me but it doesn't."  
  
Randy finally looked to see what was happening and when he saw it his eyes widened and he stood up and asked, "What the hell is going on?"  
  
"Finally notice me, do you?" Sara asked back after she stopped licking Chip. She stood up too and poked Randy in the chest.  
  
"Take it outside!" Mr. Connors instantly called out in an unamused tone. Sara continued to poke Randy as she stomped towards the exit. Randy followed close behind. Before Sara left she said to the teacher, "Fuck you!"  
  
Mr. Connors shook his head and muttered to himself, "And mother told me to be a doctor and I said 'No mother, I want to teach punk ass kids to succeed in life'. I should've been a doctor...."  
  
Jenna stopped licking Chip, smiled at him innocently and started shaking Stu without even looking at him. Stu shot up in his seat and said tiredly, "Fuck you Billy!"  
  
"Excuse me?" Jenna questioned blankly. Stu just smiled at her when realizing where he was and said, "Let's go." 


	38. How About That Rain?

Chip, Jenna and Stu walked together down the hallway. Stu was wide-awake now as he asked, "So Chip, how are you liking things so far?"  
  
"Everything's fine," Chip answered simply. Stu nodded then inquired, "Sara sure is a bitch, isn't she?"  
  
Jenna rolled her eyes as Chip answered, "She's okay."  
  
"HEY!" Kayleigh called out as she chased them down. They stopped walking and waited for her. When she caught up she asked, "Any interesting new developments, my little psychos?"  
  
"No," Jenna's eyes shifted around in paranoia. Stu began to tickle Jenna's sides and she quickly slapped his hands away. Kayleigh noted this and then asked Chip, "You wanna go buy some caffeine, Chippo?"  
  
"Sure," Chip answered with a bored shrug. The two began to walk in the other direction and Stu and Jenna exchanged devilish looks.  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
As Randy led Sara tightly by the arm to his room she kept poking him in the chest. Reaching the room he threw open the door and pushed her inside. Sara glared and asked, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"  
  
"You're a whore!" Randy said calmly. Sara slapped him across the face and said, "Well, so are you!"  
  
"No, I'm not!" He defended. She rolled her eyes and said, "Fuck you!"  
  
"No thanks!" Randy replied.  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
(A/n: This little section is graphic so if you don't want to read it then you don't have to.)  
  
Jenna walked in front of Stu and he stared after her eagerly. He speeded up his stride and started tickling her again. She again slapped his hands away carelessly. A pout formed on Stu's face, "Fine! Deny me all pleasure, why don't you!"  
  
He started walking in front of her and began to realize how close they were to her room. He looked back at her to see her charging towards him. She tackled him until he was pinned against the wall. She kissed him and started moving towards her nearby door. She opened it and entered the room. He followed behind her.  
  
He closed and locked the door then turned around to face her. Jenna no longer stood at his side. Now she sat on her bed rigidly as she looked down at the floor. He slowly moved towards her while asking, "Why so tense?"  
  
"Oh?" She quickly looked up at him and forced a smile as she denied, "I'm not tense! I'm as relaxed as I can get!"  
  
He sat down next to her and stared with craving eyes. He brushed her hair away from her neck and slowly moved in and kissed her neck softly. She smiled genuinely then asked, "Is this going to be a daily routine for us, Stu?"  
  
"I sure as hell hope so," He answered then continued to kiss her. She lifted his head so it was level with hers and kissed him. He eagerly kissed her back forcefully as he eased her backward so that he was on top of her.  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
Sara glared at Randy and yelled defensively, "I'm not a slut, you bastard!"  
  
"If the shoe fits!" Randy yelled back.  
  
She rolled her eyes and said calmly, "Fine, we're breaking up! I hate you!"  
  
"I'd hardly say we were dating, you psycho!" He smarted back.  
  
She barred her teeth and slapped him across the face and screamed, "FUCK OFF!!"  
  
"Just leave then!" Randy pointed furiously at his door. Sara frowned and kept standing there for a moment. Then she suddenly tackled him until she was on top of him and he was on his bed.  
  
She smiled innocently, kissed him and said, "I'm sorry!"  
  
"Excuse me?" He asked in confusion. She repeated, "I'm sorry."  
  
"Okay..." He muttered, glancing around. Sara just got off of him and walked toward the door. She waved and said, "I'll see you later..."  
  
She opened the door and walked out. Randy stared after her in confusion and muttered, "That was odd."  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
Stu laid flat on his back as Jenna sat on top of him. She modestly glanced around as his hands traveled up her shirtless back until they reached the clasp of her bra. When he skillfully unhooked it and Jenna felt her bra loosen around her she blushed slightly. Noticing her embarrassment he asked, "What's wrong?"  
  
"Ummmm," She answered awkwardly, "I have a problem with nudity."  
  
He sent her an odd look then asked teasingly, "Then should I get my pants back on?"  
  
"No!" She insisted, "Your nudity is fine."  
  
Stu grinned devilishly as he moved one of his hands to her neck and pulled her downward into a kiss. Distracting her with the deep kiss Stu moved the straps of her bra down her arms as much as he could with her chest pressed against his. He rolled her over so he was on top of her. He grinned as he quickly removed the bra and tossed it off to the side. They stared at one another for a moment then Stu licked her cheek. She laughed and licked him back. Then in unison they both pointed out, "Needs salt."  
  
They both grinned until seriousness came over them as Stu moved both hands down to her thighs. He caressed her thighs as he kissed her. She wrapped one of her arms around his neck and kissed him forcefully and longingly. Her chest heaved against his as she wrapped her legs around him. He slowly entered her and stared down into her eyes as he slowly and gently moved inside her. She continued to kiss him as she grinded into him. She moaned slightly and he thrust harder into her.  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
"So Chip, do you like Jenna?" Kayleigh asked curiously as they walked down the busy hallway.  
  
Chip sent her paranoid stares and asked back, "Why do you ask?"  
  
"Because I think you have a little crush on her," Kayleigh accused.  
  
He nervously rubbed the back of his neck and pointed out, "I just met her."  
  
"Then I'm gonna accuse you of liking Sara," Kayleigh shrugged as she noticed they already were at the door. Kayleigh tried opening the door but it was locked and commented, "That's strange. Usually no one ever locks the door."  
  
Kayleigh began to search her pockets for a key as Chip said, "Both Sara and Jenna are taken."  
  
"You caught that, did you? Good job! I'm glad you realize that." Kayleigh reached down and reached into her striped socks and pulled out a single key. Chip stared at her oddly and she explained, "Socks are like portable safes, man."  
  
She put the key into the lock and turned it. When she heard the clicking noise of the door unlocking she pushed it open and walked in while asking, "Why was the door-"  
  
Kayleigh gasped as her eyes fell upon Jenna's bed. Jenna stopped mid-moan and screamed slightly. Stu stopped doing the dirty deed and muttered, "Fuck!"  
  
"You guys aren't doing what I think you're doing," Kayleigh told herself. Stu crawled off the bed and held the blanket up to shield his lower and better half. Jenna flattened the blanket against her and blushed violently. Kayleigh glanced at the two of them anxiously then Stu unintentionally let go of the shielding blanket just as Chip entered through the door. Kayleigh gasped slightly after getting a good look of all of Stu and collapsed to the floor unconscious. Chip looked frantically from Kayleigh to Stu. Noticing Stu's bareness Chip yelled, "What the hell, man!"  
  
Stu squatted down to the floor so that the bed blocked Chip's view. Chip looked to Jenna, opened his mouth to ask her something then thought against it and silenced himself. Stu uncomfortably looked around for his clothes then realized they were on the other side of the bed. Stu peeked over the bed and asked nervously, "Chip man, can you hand me my pants?"  
  
"Do I have to?" He asked, his eye wide. Jenna noticed the door was wide open and squealed, "Close the door first!"  
  
He closed the door and slowly grabbed Stu's pants from the floor and tossed them to him. Stu caught them and quickly began to put them on. Jenna held the blanket against her as she looked around for her clothes. She saw that everything was out of her reach and stared at Chip for a moment. She pointed to her bra and asked shyly, "Can you hand me that?"  
  
"Sure," He slowly picked it up then stared at it and realized it was her bra. He bit down on his lower lip to stop him from laughing as he handed it to her. She pulled the straps up her bare arms. She glanced up at Chip and noticed that he was staring at her. He blushed and pulled the blanket over her head and hooked her bra around her.  
  
Chip continued to stare as Jenna came back out from under the blanket. She let the blanket fall to her waste which caused her barely covered chest to be visible. He took in all of her features as she asked in an embarrassed tone, "Hand me my shirt, will you?"  
  
He handed her her shirt and she pulled it on quickly. Her and Chip locked eyes for a moment then she laughed. That's when Stu stood up wearing everything but his left sock. Chip quickly looked down at the floor to avoid Stu's unaware stares. Jenna yawned and asked, "Give me the rest of my clothes!"  
  
Chip bent down to get it and Stu insisted, "I've got that!"  
  
Stu moved over to Chip, bent down and picked up Jenna's remaining clothes. He then handed them to Jenna and kissed her on her forehead. She grinned and hid under her blanket to finish redressing. There was a great awkwardness between Stu and Chip and no one said anything until Chip uncomfortably tried to make conversation, "How about that rain yesterday? That was crazy!"  
  
"Yeah..." Stu nodded as he glanced over at Kayleigh. Then Jenna lifted the cover and said, "This never took place!"  
  
"Sure it did," Stu said, a little defensively as he wondered why she was ashamed or whatever. Jenna shook her head and said slowly, "No, it didn't."  
  
"Awww, you no longer love me Jenna?" Stu asked in a mocking tone though he was serious. Jenna grinned and explained, "I'm just saying that we shouldn't tell Sara unless you want her to kill you."  
  
"What about me and murder?" Sara asked as she leaned in the now open doorway. This made everyone jump slightly and made both Jenna and Stu panic. Sara closed the door then moved so she was standing over Kayleigh. She looked down so that her hair dangled in her face then turned and looked sideways at everyone and asked, "What happened here?"  
  
"Nothing," Jenna and Stu answered quickly then Chip explained, "She fainted."  
  
"Cool!" Sara nodded and shrugged. 


	39. A Much Healthier Therapeutic Expression

Kayleigh sat in the waiting room fidgeting madly. She didn't blink once as her widened eyes darted around the room taking in all its features. She jiggled her leg nervously against the leg of the wooden chair. She stared at the wooden door with the sign that read 'counselor' on it, awaiting it to open.  
  
Then she heard the other door, the entrance to the waiting room opened and she looked towards it immediately. Her blank expression didn't change as she saw Shannon walk in with a pink ski cap pulled down over her forehead. When Shannon saw Kayleigh she glared, pointed and shrieked, "YOU!"  
  
Kayleigh remained silent as she tilted her head to the side innocently. Shannon rolled her eyes and sat down in the farthest chair away from Kayleigh which was closest to the counselor door. No one said anything and the room was silent.  
  
After about ten minutes of this the counselor door flew open and a boy stomped out while snapping, "I don't have a fucking gambling problem!" The boy had dark hair that fell flat on top of his head. His teal eyes shifted around the room. In his left ear was a large diamond earring that would usually make Kayleigh snicker. The boy turned around and faced the door he exited.  
  
A middle aged woman appeared in the doorway with a plastic neon pink flyswatter in hand. Her emerald eyes rolled slightly as a smile appeared on her narrow face. She wore hot pink lipstick that contrasted greatly against her emerald dress suit. Her graying red hair was pulled tightly back in a bun. (A/N: Holy shit! I think I just described this one character with more description then anything else in this story. Why, you ask? Because I'm in perfectionist mode!) The woman's icy voice said to the boy, "We shall discuss your denial in our next session, Mr. Fishman."  
  
The woman scanned the room, turned towards Shannon and said, "You're next."  
  
The boy, Fishman shrieked to no one in particular, "I bet you ten bucks she tells you that you have a gambling problem!"  
  
Shannon just stood up and walked into the woman's office behind her. The woman closed the door and the waiting room fell silent again. Fishman looked at Kayleigh one last time then started walking out while rambling about how he was not a poker addict.  
  
# - # - #  
  
Stu and Jenna walked towards Randy's room. Stu poked Jenna's sides slightly and commented, "That was very awkward."  
  
"I agree!" Jenna nodded and slapped his hands away. After a moment of silence Jenna randomly asked, "Have you ever had any pets?"  
  
"Yes. Have you?" Stu asked, trying to get the discussion away from himself. Jenna nodded happily and answered, "I used to have cat named Emma. Sara used to torture her."  
  
"I accidentally killed my dog Cujo," Stu said blankly. Jenna stopped walking and inquired, "What? How?"  
  
"Oh! I hit him with the car on accident," Stu shrugged. Jenna hesitantly started walking again and muttered, "Okay..."  
  
"He was mean anyway," Stu tried to justify his accidental murder.  
  
"You fucking psycho...." Jenna shook her head and started to walk ahead of Stu. He speeded up as well and insisted, "You know you like it."  
  
# - # - #  
  
"Well, Miss -?" The woman sat in her chair still gripping the flyswatter as she stared at Shannon in a way that questioned her name. Shannon sat on the leather couch and stuttered, "Oh, I'm Shannon. Shannon Richie."  
  
"Well, Miss Richie, I am Doctor Almonds," The woman introduced then questioned, "What can I do for you today?"  
  
"Well..." Shannon slowly moved her hands up to her hat and pulled it off to reveal a shaved head. Shannon explained, "I have a bit of a problem."  
  
"I am not a hairdresser," Doctor Almonds pointed out as she looked around her office in paranoia.  
  
# - # - #  
  
Sara and Chip sat next to each other on her bed in silence, not knowing what to say. Then Sara said, "Stu is a bastard."  
  
"He seems okay," Chip shrugged as they both stared at a wall. Sara rolled her eyes and insisted, "Trust me, he is."  
  
"So," Chip wanted to stop talking about Stu, "What's with you and Randy?"  
  
"Oh! He's my slave," Sara answered. She thought then continued, "We have a funny relationship."  
  
"How is it funny?" He asked.  
  
"Hmmmm...." Sara thought again which never was a good thing then answered, "I like to piss him off and he becomes a bastard sometimes. I love it when he gets all mad and junk."  
  
"You're strange," Chip commented. She nodded and muttered, "You know you like it!" (A/N: Gasp! Deja vu!)  
  
# - # - #  
  
The door to Doctor Almonds' office flew open again and Shannon walked out with a depressed look on her face. Kayleigh stared at the now depressed girl and thought to herself, "The rumors were true! All therapists either are child molesters or ramble on about their meaningless lives."  
  
Doctor Almonds watched as Shannon walked out of the waiting room silently. Then she looked to Kayleigh, the only person left in the room and said, "You're next, miss!"  
  
Kayleigh silently stood up and followed the woman into her office. Dr. Almonds closed the door, pointed to a couch located against the wall and insisted, "Please, sit down."  
  
Kayleigh did as she was told after taking a good look of the office. Many framed pictures of old movie actors and actresses with their autographs littered the walls. Dying plants were placed in each of the four corners of the room. The desk which Dr. Almonds sat behind was cluttered with loose paperwork and family photographs, plus a tangled up slinky. The couch Kayleigh sat on was made of black leather, which made her wonder what the school's priorities actually were: fancy couches or the students. Her money was on the couches....  
  
Almonds smiled kindly then asked, "May I ask what your name is?"  
  
Kayleigh just stared at the woman blankly and said nothing.  
  
"I'll need to know your name before I can help you, dear!" Dr. Almonds tapped her foot impatiently as she waited for Kayleigh to speak.  
  
Kayleigh continued to stare silently.  
  
"You can call me Joyce if you wish," Dr. Almonds offered, trying to get Kayleigh to speak.  
  
Kayleigh still just stared.  
  
Joyce started questioning the intelligence of the girl in her office and impatiently asked, "What is four plus five?"  
  
Kayleigh quickly raised nine fingers then slowly returned to her staring.  
  
"Are you mute or something?" Joyce asked in irritation.  
  
Kayleigh decided this would be amusing so quickly nodded "yes".  
  
Joyce's eyes widened as she questioned in disbelief, "Are you serious?"  
  
Kayleigh nodded again.  
  
"Well then...." Dr. Almonds reached underneath her desk and grabbed a white dry erase board with the marker for it. She stood and handed the objects to Kayleigh and said, "Write on that..."  
  
Kayleigh quickly scribbled down something then held it up for the doctor. It said "Greetings and salutations! My name is Jenna Chipman!"  
  
"What can I help you with, Jenna?" Joyce asked.  
  
Kayleigh started writing up till the point where she was drawing stick figures. She sighed, tossed the board aside and said, "Screw it! I'm not mute, silly. God, its too early to write...."  
  
"You lied about being mute?" Joyce asked in confusion.  
  
"Yeah..." Kayleigh shrugged innocently, "Don't blame me... I've been traumatized!"  
  
Joyce just stared at her in shock for five minutes straight. Then she rolled her eyes and ordered, "Tell me what's wrong!"  
  
# - # - #  
  
Stu and Jenna sat beside each other on Brock's bed. Randy was the cause of the tension that filled the room as he sat across from them, glaring. Stu stared blankly back as Jenna eyed her black fingernails in false interest, trying to ignore the angry stares flying in her direction. No one had said anything for the longest time until she asked in a nervous yet calm voice, "Are you two going to kill me?" She glanced at Stu then Randy and added, "Because that would suck!"  
  
Stu laughed and said "Of course not" as Randy stiffly said "Probably..." They looked at one another in shock and questioned in unison, "What did you say?"  
  
"Rules are rules!" Randy replied simply.  
  
Stu sarcastically said, "Then Sara has to die! Blondes always have to die!"  
  
Randy looked offended as he pointed at Stu and said, "Don't add on to my rules, bitch!"  
  
Jenna looked at the seriousness the two shared and started laughing madly. Both boys looked at her as though she was crazy (which she is) until she stopped laughing. She became serious again as she asked, "Are you going to kill me or not?"  
  
"You saw Brock's body," Randy pointed out.  
  
Jenna pouted slightly as she looked at her shoes. Then she looked up again with her face lit up as she insisted, "I can keep a secret!"  
  
"Yeah she can," Stu agreed as he started petting her head slightly.  
  
Jenna grinned and said in a falsely innocent tone, "Besides, Sara wouldn't really want to date my killer."  
  
"Well," Randy considered this dilemma then said, "Stu can kill you!"  
  
"I'd much prefer her alive! I'm not Ted Bundy!" Stu continued to pet her head.  
  
She started petting his leg while saying, "That's a good boy."  
  
The two locked eyes and Randy noticed the lustful longing that passed between the two. Quickly he stood up and yelled, "NOO!"  
  
"'NOO' what?" Stu looked away from Jenna finally. Randy frantically replied, "There will be no sex in my room! We are having a serious conversation here!"  
  
"Weren't we debating my murder or something?" Jenna questioned.  
  
"Yeah!" Stu nodded then stared at Randy and announced, "We aren't killing my Jenna!"  
  
"Damn you! Fine!" Randy snapped his fingers then sat back down. He relaxed then asked casually, "What's with this new Chip guy?"  
  
"Oh... He's Sara's new play thing..." Jenna teased. She shrugged and answered, "I don't know much. For all we know he could be some psycho killer..." The three exchanged looks and she added, "You two probably covered that..."  
  
"So..." Stu began, "What do you think about me being the killer?"  
  
"At least you aren't a giant chicken man..." She commented. Realizing he finally admitted to being the killer she squealed, "Clark Kent! You finally have shown me your secret identity!"  
  
"I guess I have," Stu rubbed the back of his neck as he looked Jenna over in a hungry manner.  
  
Jenna smiled widely then quickly reached up and kissed Stu. Randy watched and rolled his eyes. Stu smiled through the kiss as his hands automatically moved down her stomach to the bottom of her shirt. He, forgetting about Randy, started lifting Jenna's shirt off of her. Randy covered his eyes and yelped, "Hey, man!"  
  
"Oh?" Stu muttered distractedly through his kisses. His eyes widened and he quickly returned Jenna's shirt to the way it was. He looked at Randy after pulling away from his and Jenna's kiss, pointed at him and asked accusingly, "Why were you watching us? Are you one of those perverts?"  
  
"What? No!" Randy stuttered awkwardly, "You are the one who is trying to get freshy freshy in a dead guys bed! Perv boy!"  
  
"Fine!" Jenna's eyes shifted around madly, "We'll get freshy freshy in your bed!"  
  
Randy just moved to his dresser, opened the top drawer, grabbed something then turned back towards them. "Stop ignoring me!" Randy whined as he waved the freshly retrieved knife at them.  
  
Jenna eyed the knife and said fearlessly, "Put that shit away before I kick your ass!"  
  
Randy stared at Jenna blankly then eventually dropped the knife while saying, "You all suck!"  
  
"You need to get laid!" Was all Stu said in response. Then he and Jenna exchanged the same lustful looks.  
  
Randy just shook his head and started walking towards his door. He opened the door, looked at them angrily and ordered, "Stay away from my bed!"  
  
He left, closing the door behind him. Jenna and Stu looked after him, looked at each other and said in unison, "He needs sex!"  
  
"So do I!" Stu said after a moment, then started pulling at her shirt again. She kissed him passionately then said, "Horny bats unite!"  
  
He grinned and began the dirty deed with a longing, eager kiss.  
  
# - # - #  
  
Joyce Almonds stared at Kayleigh with an obligated look of care as she awaited Kayleigh's explanation of why she was so troubled. In her emerald eyes it was obvious she was a little upset with the girl in front of her for the lie of being mute. Jiggling her leg impatiently she questioned, "Well? What's troubling you?"  
  
"Sex! Sex is evil! Sex is bothersome! Sex is the problem!" Kayleigh answered shakily as Joyce stared at her dubiously.  
  
"We are all doomed!" Kayleigh shrieked madly.  
  
Joyce blinked blankly for a few minutes and asked, "Care to elaborate?"  
  
"Jenna and Stu had sex! They are gonna die and that'll be sad!" Kayleigh replied in a sad tone. She raised her eyebrows at the doctor and added, "I saw the whores!"  
  
"Who are Jenna and Stu?" The shrink asked curiously.  
  
"Well... Jenna is my roommate and homie and Stu is her bitch. His dead roommate used to date my other roommate, Sara," Kayleigh explained.  
  
"Oh? This Stu fellow's roommate was one of the murdered kids?" Joyce asked, curiosity more apparent in her voice.  
  
"Yes," Kayleigh answered carelessly. Then she pointed out, "We are supposed to be talking about me!"  
  
"Oh yeah....." Joyce rolled her eyes boredly and asked, "What's wrong again?"  
  
"I've been traumatized!" Kayleigh exclaimed. Then she grumbled, "You suck..."  
  
"You know... I know exactly what you are going through," Almonds said which made Kayleigh's face light up. Then she continued dramatically, "When I was ten I walked in on my parents going at it. I never looked at them the same."  
  
"Right. What does that have to do with anything?" Kayleigh questioned boredly, wishing she was somewhere else.  
  
"You know..." Joyce began. She thought then accused, "I think you are so bothered by seeing your friends together sexually because you like Stu."  
  
Kayleigh said nothing for five minutes straight; she just stared at the woman in shock. Then finally she protested, "You are so wrong! I don't like Stu like that, man!"  
  
"Ah... Denial is natural. Of course you like someone that you can't have." Joyce insisted.  
  
"I don't like Stu, man! That is just wrong! He is Jenna's territory," Kayleigh pointed out defensively.  
  
Joyce looked at Kayleigh with narrowed eyes, as though she was trying to see write into Kayleigh's mind. Then she asked, "You mean you don't even find this guy attractive in any way or form?"  
  
"Well..." Kayleigh considered this then finally answered, "He is kinda cute but-"  
  
Joyce cut in, "Ah ha! I knew it! You love your friend's boyfriend!"  
  
"NO I DON'T!" Kayleigh yelled in frustration.  
  
Joyce looked at Kayleigh in disgust then said, "Its not nice to steal other peoples boyfriend. I know it happened to me often when I was in high school..."  
  
"GOD! I don't care!" Kayleigh yelled as she stood up and started stomping towards the exit. She sent one last look towards the crazy woman and spat, "Bitch!"  
  
She opened the door and started stomping away, deciding that she'd rather be mute then ever talk to that damn woman again.  
  
# - # - #  
  
"You like Jenna, don't you?" Sara questioned as she continued to stare at the wall blankly.  
  
Chip looked away from the boring wall to the blonde who sat beside him. He asked back, "Why do you ask?"  
  
"Because you always are staring at her. You could even be considered as her stalker," Sara answered, envy apparent in her voice.  
  
He noticed her tone and asked, "Are you jealous or something?"  
  
"Sort of..." She thought then answered truthfully, "Everyone always likes Jenna! Even in high school she was always the peoples first choice to rape.... It's not fair, man!"  
  
"Rape?" He repeated in bewilderment. Sara grinned and said, "Yeah. That's actually a funny story. I'll have to tell you about it sometime..."  
  
"You have Randy," Chip reminded her, forgetting about the whole rape thing. She wrinkled up her face in displeasure and said, "I don't know. Randy is simply Randy. There isn't anything godly about him."  
  
"Are you bipolar by any chance?" Chip wondered. She thought, shrugged and answered, "Probably...." She looked at him then asked suddenly, "You want to make out?"  
  
"What? Why?" He questioned in bewilderment.  
  
Sara shrugged again, sighed sorrowfully then muttered, "Randy isn't Scotty......"  
  
"Who is Scotty?" He wondered.  
  
Sara looked at him in a startled way and lied, "He's no one! Shut up!" She stood from the bed and glared at him slightly  
  
"What? I thought we were going to make out," Chip raised an eyebrow at her.  
  
She smiled wickedly then said, "Okay, lets make out!"  
  
"What? We're gonna make out? When? Why?" Chip looked Sara up and down in complete confusion.  
  
"Well...." Sara sat back down beside him. She looked down at the floor as she prophesized, "We probably will end up kissing eventually. By then when it happens everything will just turn all insane...."  
  
"So we might as well get it over with now?" He finished. She nodded and answered simply, "Yup!"  
  
Chip considered this then agreed, "Okay. We should kiss and get it over with."  
  
Sara glanced at him nervously as he stared at her expectantly. Slowly, in an unsure manner, Sara moved her hands to both sides of his face and started moving her face closer to his. He wrapped an arm around her waste as he bent his face to hers. They both paused when their lips were near one another's. Sara quickly leaned in and kissed him. He had no chance to kiss her back as she pulled away, shrugged and asked, "Did you feel any magic?"  
  
"Honestly? I didn't have the chance to feel anything," He pointed out. She patted him on the head, touching his long hair with joy as she said, "We'll just be friends."  
  
"That's fine with me!"  
  
# - # - #  
  
Jenna and Stu lay side by side on Brock's bed, a relaxed look on both their faces. The sheets were wrapped around their bare bodies. Stu sighed and wondered, "Do you think we'll die?"  
  
"No..." Jenna answered with little thought. Stu stared at her and asked curiously, "What makes you say that?"  
  
"I doubt Randy will kill us," Jenna stared back at him. He stroked her cheek slightly then wondered in a morbid tone, "What if death comes after us and we die like the people did in Final Destination?"  
  
"Like getting decapitated at rail road tracks?" Jenna asked, grinning at the thought of the movie.  
  
Stu nodded then asked, "How do you think you'll die?"  
  
"I'll probably die from an overdose after I take pills thinking they are vitamins and candy...." She answered in a sad, serious tone. Then she added, "Or I'll get hit by a bus."  
  
Stu looked around the room sorrowfully and said, "I bet anything a television set falls on me and crushes my bones for its bread." Jenna stared at him blankly then started laughing at the thought. She paused her laughter and asked, "What kind of death is that?"  
  
"Its mine!" Stu shrieked defensively. Jenna started petting his head as she said, "Be kind and rewind!"  
  
"Rewind what?" He asked in confusion. A look spread across her face which made it apparent that she didn't know what she meant when she answered, "Your actions."  
  
He considered what she meant when a menacing look spread across his face. He started to kiss her as his hands traveled down her sheet covered body. Through parted lips she moaned longingly then ducked under the sheet and pulled him down under with her.  
  
# - # - #  
  
Once she heard a knock on the door, Sara quickly got up from the bed and opened it. She smiled when she saw Randy standing outside her door and greeted happily, "Hello Randall!"  
  
"Hey...." Randy looked into the room and saw Chip sitting on Sara's bed. An immediate look of dislike covered Randy's face as he asked Sara, "You want to go for a walk?"  
  
Sara looked at him suspiciously and answered uncertainly, "Sure." Randy started backing further back into the hall as he waited for her to join him. Sara looked at Chip and threatened, "If you go through my junk I'll kick your ass.... Have fun, Chip!" She waved and walked out of the room, closing the door behind her. She started following Randy down the hall when she wondered, "Why do you want to walk?"  
  
"Because I like fresh air and exercise!" Randy answered. She instantly accused, "Liar."  
  
# - # - #  
  
Author's Note:  
  
Everyone, I have decided what the "theme song" for the sequel shall be! It shall be "Hey Driver" by Lucky Boys Confusion! Right on? It's a cool song! 


	40. Cafeterias Create Chaos

Sara and Randy walked outside on the windy fall afternoon. Sara stared at her passing classmates with great dislike as she muttered, "They walk around as if they are unaware of their possible demise."  
  
Randy reached over and grabbed her hand, holding it within his once it was in his reach. He grinned and asked, "Are you plotting against them?"  
  
"Naw..." She finally looked at Randy as she answered, "I save most of my great plots for Stu."  
  
Randy nodded carelessly as he began to walk, tugging on her arm like it was a leash. She followed him and asked, "Why do you want to walk and breathe in the toxic fresh air?"  
  
"We need to talk..." Randy answered simply. Sara stopped dead in her tracks, her hand slipping out of his. She questioned sarcastically, "Uh oh! Is the wedding off?"  
  
"No, the wedding is still on," Randy stared at her with a smile on his face. She smiled back with innocence in her eyes as she knew not what he might wish to speak of. She quickly asked in a goofy voice a five year old would use, "Then what?"  
  
"I just want to talk and maybe get to know you more," Randy shrugged. Sara snorted and teased, "What are you? A girl?"  
  
"It's just that you and I never really talk. We always are just fighting and breaking up and talking about how much a bastard Stu is. We should just talk...." Randy shrugged  
  
"Speaking of Stu..." She began as she walked in front of Randy. She took both of his hands into hers and started leading him somewhere as she walked backwards to their destination. As she walked she continued what she was going to say about Stu and asked, "Do you think Stu and Jenna are in love?"  
  
Randy laughed uncertainly as he considered the question. Finally he answered, "Maybe they are. Who knows..."  
  
"I doubt Stu is capable of loving someone," Sara responded, hate for Stu apparent in her voice. She shook her head violently, in a way that made it seem like she was casting Stu away from her mind. Finally, she grinned and asked, "What do you think of redheads?"  
  
"Why?" He was confused by her question. She just rolled her eyes and ordered in a giggly voice, "Just tell me what you think of redheads!"  
  
"They are fine..." Randy answered uncertainly then quickly added, "They are nothing compared to lovely blondes though."  
  
Grinning, she said, "Good answer; just not the one I was looking for."  
  
"Why was is wrong?"  
  
"Blondes used to include Shannon the slutty whore, you know? You've just proved that you want to jump her bones!"  
  
"I don't wish to jump any girls bones!" He defended, meaning to say the only girls' bones he wanted to jump were those of the girl walking with him.  
  
Sara sent him a skeptical stare as she shrieked, "YOU WANT STU'S BODY! I KNEW IT!"  
  
"What?! No, no, no! Just shhh! Where did that come from?" Randy glanced around at the passer-byers nervously.  
  
"Don't you read fan fictions, man? It's a little thing called slash. You never EVER want to read Harry Potter junk about Snape and little Harry. It's DISTURBING!" Sara explained, "You and Stu would be perfect!"  
  
"Oh god... Oh god! OH GOD! That is wrong on so many levels. Why would you say such an evil thing?" Randy replied, bewildered.  
  
Sara kissed Randy quickly and said, "Don't worry, baby! I don't mind if your gay..."  
  
"I'm not-"  
  
She cut in and suggested, "I'm hungry. We should eat."  
  
"Okay," He agreed. "And then you have to tell me why you think that I am Harry and Stu is my Snape."  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
They sat in the crowded cafeteria beside each other at one of the many long, rectangular tables that covered the red and white room. Both Sara and Randy had plates of mysterious food items set on their blue plastic trays. They were silent as they listened in their surrounding classmates trivial conversation.  
  
Then Kayleigh silently sat across from them, letting her tray echo as it slammed itself down on the table. Sara stared at Kayleigh and asked, "What's up?"  
  
"If ever you walk in on Jenna and Stu having sex never turn to the guidance counselor for help!" Kayleigh insisted.  
  
Sara and Randy exchanged confused looks then Randy asked in amusement, "Was it like porn?"  
  
"There wasn't any porn music or blondes," Kayleigh replied. Right on cue, Sara imitated porn music as she twirled her hair pointlessly. Kayleigh snickered then ordered, "Let's just drop the whole thing."  
  
"So..." Sara absent mindedly stabbed her food with the plastic fork as she asked with a laugh, "Did you see Stu naked?"  
  
"Sara! I'm not talking about it again. Ever!" Kayleigh replied in a firm voice.  
  
Randy looked at Sara and asked suspiciously, "Why do you care if she saw Stu naked?"  
  
Sara sent him a look that was annoyed and menacing. She stood up from her seat, the chair scraping against the floor. She walked behind Randy, her arm gliding across his shoulders. When she made it to his side she leaned against the spot of the table where no one sat. She smirked before a look of false, yet great pleasure spread across her face. She laid back on the table and stared moaning loudly, "Oh GOD! STU! Your body is ORGASMIC! I want it so bad!"  
  
Kayleigh, along with other nameless random people stared at Sara in slight horror and confusion. Randy just looked unamused as he said, "Just shut up and eat your potatoes."  
  
Sara looked shocked as she questioned in disbelief, "That white crap was potatoes?" Randy nodded and she added, "I thought it was skinless chicken."  
  
Randy stared silently and blankly at the blonde for a minute then looked at Kayleigh and asked, "See any good movies lately?"  
  
"Naw... Just shitty Meg Ryan movies," Kayleigh shrugged. Randy nodded and said, "Shame on you!"  
  
Sara, ignoring everyone else, started moaning loudly again as she yelled, "OH MY GOD! Randy! Take me now! I WANT YOUR BODY!"  
  
People stared at the girl as though she was crazy, which she was then continued with their meaningless conversations. The corners of Randy's mouth turned up slightly into a smile. He poked Sara in the side and asked, "Why do you always make a scene?"  
  
She quickly got off the table and returned to her seat. She then asked, "If this was a scary movie who would be more memorable? Me or Nameless Teen #1?"  
  
"Nameless Teen #1 is always in our hearts and minds," Kayleigh answered teasingly. Randy looked Sara over and inquired, "Who are you again?"  
  
"Damn you all!" Sara shrieked, drawing attention to herself once again.  
  
That's when they all noticed Stu and Jenna making their way towards the small group with dreamy, mellowed looks on their faces. Jenna sat down beside Kayleigh and Stu sat next to her, draping an arm around her shoulders as he ignored his tray of food. Sara ignored Stu as she spoke, "Jenna! You're just the ego booster I wanted to see! Tell me, who is a more memorable character? Me or Nameless Teen #1?"  
  
"Nameless Teen #1 owns," Jenna replied, shrugging happily.  
  
"That means nothing coming from the girl who is turned on by Hobbits!" Sara stuck her fist up at Jenna. "Damn you all!"  
  
"I actually think you beat Nameless Teen #1, Sara..." Stu said as he stared blankly at his food.  
  
The blonde narrowed her eyes in suspicion and asked, "Why is that, Stuart?"  
  
"Because...." Stu answered, "You are so god damn annoying that everyone spends all their time plotting your demise. Nameless Teen never gets noticed, thanks to you."  
  
Jenna shook her head at them, looked at Kayleigh and asked, "Are you okay?"  
  
Kayleigh stared at her blankly then glanced at Stu and muttered, "I think I'm gonna go talk to Chip..."  
  
"Awww... Don't leave me, Kayleigh! What will the children think?" Jenna said dramatically as she held on to Kayleigh's wrist to keep her there with them.  
  
Kayleigh just pet the top of Jenna's head and answered in the same dramatic way, "The children will be fine. Well, they'll be fine until they find out that I'm leaving you for other men."  
  
Sara, ignoring everyone else as usual asked, "Do you guys think the killer is plotting to slice and dice me up into a pizza?"  
  
"It depends.... Are you allergic to Italian?" Stu asked, a wicked grin on his face. She shook her head and he said with a definite nod, "You'll definitely become tomorrows lunch."  
  
"No she wont!" Randy defended sternly, sending Stu a knowing look. Stu just replied, "Whatever. As if you have any say in it."  
  
Randy kicked Stu from under the table as if to say "I have more of a say in it then you do." Then he heard Jenna yelp in pain. She looked at him and asked in pain, "Did you just kick me, Randy?"  
  
Everyone looked at him curiously as he answered with the first thing he could think of, "I like your shoes. I just had to touch them."  
  
"Right...." Jenna just stared at Randy blankly for a few minutes then said, "No more playing footsie, okay?"  
  
"Fair enough..." Randy muttered. Sara glared at him and shrieked, "Damn you all!"  
  
"Hey..." Kayleigh said, drawing attention to herself. Her eyes shifted around as she asked casually, "Who do you think is gonna kill our dear friend Sara?"  
  
"Who's the killer?" Stu repeated in an unnoticeably nervous voice. He, Randy and Jenna exchanged all knowing looks.  
  
Before anyone could send random accusations at anyone they all heard a male voice call out from the distance, "HEY SARA!" Random people, most likely with the name "Sara" looked his way. Sara didn't look; she just stared at her food blankly. Randy suggested, "Maybe he's calling you."  
  
"I doubt it..." Sara shrugged and reminded, "Sara is a really common name, you know."  
  
"He looks like he's coming your way," Stu said as he stared at the guy who dashed towards them.  
  
Rolling her eyes, Sara finally looked up just as the guy stood at the edge of their table. She smiled weakly at the familiar face and greeted, "Hi Paul."  
  
Kayleigh, who had been off in her own little world looked up at the newcomer and immediately recognized him to be the Fishman guy with the large earring from the waiting room. Her eyes lit up with interest.  
  
"It's Fishman," The boy corrected Sara as he glance over at Kayleigh, acknowledging their "meeting" earlier that day.  
  
"Whatever you say, Paul..." Sara sighed as she asked, "What do you want?"  
  
Jenna, deciding to ignore the new fellow who joined them, turned to Stu and asked, "Why do guys do that?"  
  
"Do what?" Randy wondered as he glared at Fishman.  
  
She glanced his way before repeating her question in a less vague way, "Why do guys always call each other by their last names?"  
  
Stu looked to actually think the question over before answering simply, "Because we are jackasses...."  
  
"Right..." Fishman eyed Stu questioningly then spoke to Sara, "I was just wondering if you were going to the funeral."  
  
"What funeral?" Sara asked in a lost tone.  
  
"Stevo's funeral..." Fishman answered slightly gravely, still sounding sort of giddy.  
  
Sara fell silent as she looked down at her unfinished plate of food in a reflective manner. Stu said happily, "We'll definitely be there. It sounds like fun...."  
  
"Okay! Cool, man!" Fishman nodded happily.  
  
Sara slowly looked up at him and asked in a distant voice, "Why are you so happy?"  
  
"Oh..." Fishy Fish answered proudly, "I just won a shit load of money!" He looked and winked at Kayleigh as he said, "Gambling problem, my ass...."  
  
They all nodded silently and Jenna mumbled something to herself that sounded strangely like "Toad licker...." Fishman nodded awkwardly and said, "I have to go, I guess..."  
  
"Okay... When is the funeral?" Sara asked.  
  
"Thursday!" He answered and added, "Same day as the big poker game."  
  
Kayleigh grinned slightly, not knowing why exactly. He smiled at her as he said, "Maybe I'll see you around Joyce's office."  
  
Then the boy started skipping off, his large earring blinding random people. As he left they all heard him say to himself, "Shit! I smell like Quigley!"  
  
Jenna stared at Kayleigh in bewilderment as she asked, "Who the fuck is Joyce?"  
  
Sara turned head sideways as she looked upon Kayleigh. She quickly asked accusingly, "You like Mr. Fishy Fishy, don't you?"  
  
Kayleigh just silently smiled as a way to say "Yes...."  
  
"Oh..." Sara said carelessly, "He's dating a girl named Dawn."  
  
Kayleigh looked down at her food sadly. Then Sara said with a head tilt in a preppy, cheerful voice, "Like, Fishman is the new Gerrit."  
  
Rolling her eyes, Kayleigh got up from her seat. She declared blankly, "Sara wants Stu's body."  
  
"I really don't blame her. I mean, look at me!" Stu stroked the top of his head confidently. Sara made a disgusted face then glared at Kayleigh slightly. She blurted out, "Kayleigh saw Stu naked and liked it!"  
  
"It's there to please," Stu shrugged with a grin. Jenna unknowingly started nodded in agreement.  
  
Kayleigh rolled her eyes and blushed out of embarrassment. Clearly upset Kayleigh started walking away silently. Jenna, trying to make everything better called after their departing friend, "I'm sorry, Kayleigh! It's not Sara's fault she's a bitch! She just is sexually repressed!"  
  
"That's right! Just blame me..." Randy mumbled. "... and Meg Ryan movies."  
  
Stu yawned tiredly and said, "Sex is fun... You two should try it."  
  
Randy rolled his eyes and muttered, "Sandra Bullock, Murder By Numbers...."  
  
"What?" Stu questioned in confusion. Jenna and Sara just nodded knowingly. Randy explained, "Murder By Numbers. You know, the movie that is more of a 'How To....' then 'Murder is bad' kind of movie. Well, Sandra says something almost exactly like what you said when she tries to seduce her cop friend."  
  
"Sandra," Jenna repeated, snickering. "You sound like you have a personal relationship with her."  
  
"Who's to say I don't?" Randy raised his eyebrows mysteriously.  
  
"I don't even know why I put up with you," Stu muttered in an annoyed yet mellowed out kind of way. "You are such a geek."  
  
"You say that like its a bad thing," Jenna replied absently as she stared at the others in the cafeteria.  
  
Sara snickered and accused, "You know you want Randy's body. Don't deny it...."  
  
"No. That's just you," Stu replied. His eyes shifted as he added, "...and Sidney...."  
  
"Who?" Sara and Jenna asked instantly. Jenna immediately forgot about the people she was spying on and stared at Stu questioningly. Sara's eyes looked between Randy and Stu, unintentional anger in her eyes.  
  
"Shut the fuck up, man!" Randy reached across the table and smacked Stu in the side of the head. He turned to Sara and reassured, "He's lying..."  
  
Sara looked him over in lostness and asked in a matching tone, "What exactly is he lying about?"  
  
"Randy can have had past girlfriends. Can't he, Psycho?" Stu shrugged innocently.  
  
"Besides.... It's not like you two are really dating," Jenna thought out loud. When Randy and Sara looked at her in a slightly offended way she explained, "You two just break up, cheat on each other, then make up like a day later."  
  
Sara and Randy exchanged offended looks, nodded and silently stood up from their seats. She wrapped one of her arms around of his and declared, "Whatever. Now we'll go off and violate each other since our relationship bothers you all so much."  
  
"Just remember who'll be the first one to go when the killer comes around," Randy shook a fist at Stu and Jenna then walked away with Sara.  
  
Jenna stared after them and commented, "She kind of forgot all about the Sidney chick."  
  
"Was that what you were trying to make happen?"  
  
"Yeah...." She nodded.  
  
Stu's body shifted forward in an odd way. He looked over at Jenna lustfully and asked, "Are you too tired?"  
  
"For what?" Jenna's eyes stared at him in a lost way.  
  
"You know what," He answered, wiggling his eyebrows and making a beast like moaning noise. He leaned over and licked the side of her face.  
  
She, in a slightly offended way, jumped up from her seat and yelped, "God! You horny bastard..." Jenna rolled her eyes and started walking away. Stu didn't really understand what was going on and simply called after her, "Don't leave me, Baby. I'll give you a cookie!"  
  
She continued to exit and he soon chased after her eagerly.  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
Sara and Randy stood outside in absolute confusion as they saw a mass of news vans scattered in front of their eyes. The many member of the local media consisted of big-haired women running around in high-heeled shoes with microphones in hand as a cameraman taped them questioning the random students. Only one news van stuck out from the rest, the only one that wasn't from channel's one through ten. Randy recognized the logo printed on the white van and immediately knew it to be the van of Top Story.  
  
"What the hell is going on, man?" Sara asked, hoping that Randy held all the answers.  
  
"That's what I wanna know!" Came Jenna's familiar voice from behind them. She soon stood at their side, looking at the media people in lostness.  
  
Randy, still staring at the Top Story news van, answered, "They probably are just now trying to get the scoop on the murders."  
  
"It's been forever since it happened though," Sara pointed out.  
  
Jenna nodded and replied, "The school probably has been trying to keep it from the media."  
  
"Holy shit!" Stu suddenly appeared beside Jenna in a mysteriously ghost like way.  
  
Randy eyed Stu acknowledgingly then suggested, "One of you girls should go and get interviewed."  
  
"There will be plenty of time for that later," Jenna said with a grin.  
  
Randy still kept his eyes on that one News van. His eyes widened when the sliding side door slowly flew open. After seeing who was crawling out of that van he blurted out in shock and dismay, "Fuck...."  
  
The familiar face of a woman he had seen not long ago emerged from that van. A woman everyone knew to be Gale Weathers.  
  
#  
  
#  
  
#  
  
Author's Note:  
  
This is my last update until I leave for Florida tomorrow. I'll be back in a little while. I hope you like the chapter. Keep on trucking. 


	41. Blood Feast

**Author's Note:**

Good news everyone!

My computers entire memory was erased (including all my numerous files) and everything was started a new. I have Microsoft Word again! So I can write comfortably again. Too bad Stevo doesn't remember the good times we've had.

Anyway… I'm sorry I haven't written in forever and a day. I'm sorry that I left you all with a smidge of a cliffhanger. I mean, since my last chapter I've been to Texas and Ohio (where I went to my friend Arielle's house. You hear that Kayleigh? If you picked up your phone you would know!).

Thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing! You all rock! Now, I dedicate this chapter:

_To Peggy Sue and one starry night._

**0-0-0-0**

**0-0-0-0**

"Gale fucking Weathers!" Stu paced back and fourth in Randy's room, waving his hands around emphatically. He repeated slowly, "Gale fucking Weathers!"

Randy was seated on his bed as he leaned his chin on his clenched fist with a sigh. He looked at the frantic Stu and commented calmly, "Yeah. I get it. Gale is here."

"But why is she here?" Stu paused his pacing, faced Randy and looked at him as if the video store geek knew all.

"She's out for world domination!" Randy answered. He added sarcastically, "It's not like six murders have anything to do with it."

"Six? Since when are there six?" Stu questioned as he returned to the back and fourth steps he was making before he stopped. "I mean, how could they know about Brock already?"

"They consider Stevo one of the victims, I guess…" Randy answered unsurely.

Stu stopped, once again facing Randy. He eyed the sitting boy suspiciously and commented, "I'm not so sure Stevo isn't one of the victims."

"Well…" Randy considered everything then supposed, "I guess he is one of the victims. Just not ours."

"How can I believe that?" Stu scoffed. Randy stood up and insisted, "I didn't kill him!"

Stu rolled his eyes and retorted, "I think you did! You _did_ want him dead, after all."

"So did you! So did everyone!" Randy reminded persistently. Stu's eyes narrowed paranoid-like until they shifted into amused shapes. He let out a short laugh and realized, "We shouldn't be fighting like this. We have bigger things to think about."

"You are absolutely right!" Randy slapped his hands together before ranting, "Why would they not have a cast commentary on the DVD for Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed? I mean… They had one for the first movie. Why not the second? The second movie was pretty good, too. I personally liked it."

Stu stared at his accomplice questioningly, wondering what the fuck made anyone rant about Scooby-Doo DVDs. The answer came to him quickly enough as he suggested, "Maybe you and Sara need to take a little break."

"Why?" Randy asked quickly, lostness in his voice. Stu simply reminded, "You're talking about Scooby-Doo, man…"

"You're right…" The movie geek looked down at himself disapprovingly, suddenly feeling ashamed. He sighed like someone who just quit smoking only to find some punk ass kid blowing the beckoning fumes into his face. He knew what he had to do.

Randy turned from Stu and moved towards a large bin that was located near his television set. Bending over the bin with a loving look in his blue eyes, he let out another "I-just-quit-smoking-so-back-off-my-grill-and-stop-taunting-me-Bitch!" sigh before violently digging in the bin. After a minute he stood back up with a DVD in hand, cradling it as if it was the little baby Jesus. Stu raised a single eyebrow before asking, "What's that?"

"It's _True Lies_," Randy answered, stroking the movie box. When Stu's skeptical eyebrow ceased to lower Randy explained, "The first step in the path of healing is remembering you're a man." Still stroking the box, he continued his explanation, "The scene where Jamie Lee Curtis is sexy dancing for the Terminator makes me remember that I'm a man. I'm a MAN, man!"

"That's debatable…" Stu taunted in a serious tone of voice. He rubbed the back of his neck, looked down at the floor and remembered Brock's corpse. The thought of Randy murdering a guy from The Real World gave him an idea. He tilted his head up, a wicked look on his demented face.

"What?" Randy questioned fearfully. He mistook Stu's menacing stares for looks of arousal and stepped back a bit. Stu smirked at Randy's alarm, figuring that he and his twig-likeness intimidated the geek. Stu tapped his own chin in a contemplating fashion before declaring, "I have an idea!"

"Does it involve Jamie Lee Curtis?" Randy asked hopefully. Stu simply shook his head and Randy thought, _Damn…_

**0-0-0-0**

Jenna walked between Kayleigh and Chip, a relaxed look on her face. She wasn't really troubled by the fact that Stu and Randy were freaking out over some news reporter with nice streaks. She knew that it wouldn't be difficult to find things out from Stu. She had something Stu wanted (like most girls did) and would use that to her advantage.

"You know…" Kayleigh began in a stoner-like accent. This made both Jenna and Chip look at the girl as the traveled to their soon to be reached destination. Kayleigh looked at each of them, making sure they were paying attention before she dived into a label-filled ramble. Seeing that she had the green light she continued (still using the stoner voice), "Our little Scooby Gang is like completed. We've got the Fred character, also known to us as Stuey. Jenna, I hate to say it, but… You're like a Velma-Daphne Twizzler…"

She paused and waited for the purple haired girl to comment. Immediately the offended Jenna inquired, "Why am I part Daphne?"

"Because…" Kayleigh thought about it and answered (adding random hand gestures to emphasize her absent point), "You are the one everyone wants to split up with when we all go look for clues. Fred wants you to hold his flashlight, Chip wants you to carry his torch, and Randy probably wants you to help him with his magnifying glass!"

Chip mouthed the word _torch_ in amusement before laughing silently to himself. Jenna peeked at Chip, a fleeting grin on her face. Then she waved her hand dismissively as a way of giving permission to continue. Kayleigh did continue, "Don't tell Sara but I fear that she may be the Scrappy character. Randy is…-" She looked lost as she questioned, "Who would Randy be?"

Jenna considered the question then answered in a lost voice, "I just don't know, Velma…"

"I'm Velma?" Kayleigh wondered. Jenna answered with a nod, "Your underplayed like Velma." When Kayleigh looked offended Jenna apologized, "I'm sorry but its true."

"I know…" Kayleigh admitted in defeat.

**0-0-0-0**

Randy listened intently to every word Stu said from his seat across from Randy, on Brock's bed. Stu's sense of humor had taken a momentary pause during his explanation of "the plan". It took him a few months after the incident in Woodsboro to realize that he no longer was going to be the little "lapdog" sidekick to a greasy haired little bitch. If this were a scary movie (which it was n the minds of the two college killers) there would be no doubt in the audiences' minds that he was the big, bad, Puff Daddy killer and was in charge of the operation. Back in Woodsboro it would be easy to become mistaken with who played the role of killer and who played the sidekick. Sure, Billy had major "Look-at-me-I'm-a-killer" qualities but that didn't mean anything. It's like no body even cared who was doing the actual murders. Who's bright idea do you think it was to kill Casey or Principal Himbry? Who do you think actually succeeded in killing their girlfriend? Who do you think killed Kenny the Cameraman and stabbed Deputy Dewey while someone was playing dead? It sure as fuck wasn't Billy Loomis…

Once Stu finished talking of "the plan" Randy just nodded, thinking over everything with a wincing look of silence disapproval. Noticing his need to say something, Stu asked annoyed, "What's wrong?"

"Well…" Randy glanced at Stu then down to his own folded hands and replied, "You're going in the right direction with this but…" He searched for the perfect words and they finally came to him. "In the first Nightmare On Elm Street when all of Nancy's friends started getting killed by Freddy and she was the only one to survive why do you think no one suspected her during her return in the third movie?"

Stu waited a moment, making sure this wasn't a rhetorical question then answered uncertainly, "She was a victim still."

"And what will we look like to the media?" Randy nodded with a smile, glad that Stu understood.

"Killers!" Stuart (that's right, I used his Christian name) clapped his hands together proudly.

Randy frowned and sighed, shaking his head with the knowledge that he himself was the actual killer. Sure, he kind of fucked up with the actual murdering thing but that wasn't the point. The point was that he was definitely the more visual member of the duo. In his mind, he was the real killer just playing the temporary role of sidekick. It was kind of like a job: you have to start from the bottom to make it to the top.

He corrected Stu, trying to make it simple and easy, "No. We'd look like victims, just like Nancy. Just like anyone else who survived."

"But everyone knew Freddy was the killer!" Stu pointed out in an "I'm-smarter-than-you" tone, a smug look on his face. The smugness quickly vanished as soon as Randy pointed out, "Not everyone believed in The Dream Demon…"

Stuey's mouth hung agape as his eyes shifted around in search of a clever response that would launch him to the top pedestal of killers again. Finally he said, "Shut up, you big loser."

Before Randy could defy his newly received command a knock sounded at the door. He moved to open the door but the knocker beat him to it and flung open the door. Jenna entered the room, skipping in cheerfully. She looked around and when her eyes landed on an annoyed Randy her happiness subsided and a child-like pout appeared; it was a look that silently asked for permission to enter the territory she already envaded.

Randy rolled his eyes and said in a way that he would to his sister Martha, "Jenna… You gotta quit doing that. I need my privacy."

Their eyes were locked until Jenna replied insincerely, "Sorry." She then skipped over to Stu and kissed him on the cheek. She explained simply, "I'm just here for a little day care drop off."

She made a beckoning motion and Chip and Kayleigh entered. Chip sent Randy a "That's-right, It's-me!" look before moving beside the two girls and Stu. Stu looked everyone over and asked confusedly, "What do ya mean?"

"Well..." Jenna sighed, twisting in his arms so that she was facing her friends. "Sara is demanding that we bond and junk with just us girls so we're dropping Chippo off."

Stu raised his hands in the air and wiggled his fingers to emphasize sarcasm, "God knows we can't oppose Sara." Jenna grinned and whispered in the same sarcastic way, "Do you really think you should be talking about God?"

He grinned wickedly and lowered his head into neck, kissing it affectionately. No one else heard as he whispered back in a husky voice, "You're right. I shouldn't speak of the big man upstairs. I've been naughty. Teach me a lesson, Jenna."

She closed her eyes for a moment, with the pleasurable thought of giving him a lesson. Then when Randy made an "Ahem" casual coughing noise her eyes shot open and she leapt away from Stu, knowing what they'd _have_ to do if she stayed near him. She grabbed Kayleigh's wrist and started tugging, heading to the door while saying, "We got to go. Bye!"

Kayleigh twisted her wrist out of Jenna's grasp and used it to waved farewell to Chip. She looked to Randy then Stu and threatened, "Be nice. He's fragile. And if you hurt him I'll sick Sara on you." Randy smiled and she added, "In a bad way!"

Jenna left the room, standing outside and waiting for her companion. As she did this Stu asked, "What do you want us to do?"

"Chip's not five. You don't have to baby sit him. Just entertain each other in a non-_Deliverance_ kind of way." Kayleigh smiled innocently then did as Jenna had and left. This left the three boys looking at one another curiously.

Chip felt kind of like a child who couldn't handle being on his own for a single second. Well that's how he was being treated anyway. He felt a bit uneasy that he was being pulled into a group of friends so easily. Sara thought a three to three ratio would be better for everyone, hence her friendliness towards the newest member of the Scooby Gang.

"So…" Chip looked from Randy (who had returned to looking for a film to watch) to Stu and back again. "What are you guys doing?"

"Nothing really," Stu answered, not acknowledging the plotting they had done. He looked over at Randy and said boredly, "Randy's gonna watch a few movies, take a few notes. Perhaps get rid of the taint Sara has put on him."

Randy sent him a "shut-the-fuck-up" look and defended, "She hasn't tainted me. I'm just revaluating myself."

Chip searched his mind for a good movie and grinned when it finally came to him. He suggested, "I'd go with a classic. Perhaps Blood Feast?"

Randy scowled, ready to bash the boy's idea then realized what movie Chip was talking about and his eyes lit up slightly. "Now… That is a good movie."

Chip nodded happily, and asked as he looked in Randy's bin of movies, "Do you have it?"

"No, man…" Randy's face fell then lit up again as he questioned, "Do you?"

Stu immediately recognized the look they both had on their faces; it was a look Randy had oh too many times. It was the look of "The Video Geeks".

"Yeah! I have it in my car. If you want, I can go and get it…" Chip gestured toward the door.

Randy nodded with that crazed "I-like-movies!" look in his eyes as he moved toward the door. "Lets go…" Chip went with Randy and left, leading him off to his car.

They left so quickly that Stu had to take a minute to realize what happened. Finally he said in disbelief, "The fuckers ditched me!"

**0-0-0-0**

Author's Note:

Sorry! That chapter is kind of pointless. The next chapter should be up in a little bit.


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